From his birth, he made friends easily. Furniture, walls, toys, all these loved his company. Unfortuantely, getting along with humans proved tougher. One of the lucky few and occasional co-conspiriter on the Files, is Mattheq.
He was raised for several feet by loving, kind parents; until he decided that he wanted to be a bigger person and left them.
Doing so, he entered many different universities, managing to stay in some for several days before they found him. Despite this and his complete lack of English he managed to secure a job as villiage idiot; to the entire British Isles.
Ten years later, finally realising that he would never be paid, he realised a childhood ambition and became a writer. He is currently working on ideas for his second sentence, while suffering from infrequent attacks of Real Life. This rare disease can strike at any time, forcing people to interact with other humans, make vauge attempts to run their life properly and generally pretend that they don't spend too much time at their computer. At this time, there is no sign of a cure.
Any resemblence to any person, living or with good lawyers, mentioned in the K Files is entirely uncoincidental, although rather suprising. The K Files is not a sinister, secretive and corrupt organisation, writing meaningless gibberish in an attempt to become famous and immortal. Probably.
No part of this internet site was coherent. The rights to transmit, copy, reproduce, edit, improve, or publish are none existant, but bear in mind that the author will be a bit miffed if anyone uses the funnier lines to try and pull the girl he's interested in. Any spelling mistakes are due to an error with the program used to transmit it.
All stuff here is free, with no intent to make a profit, simply because you would all go somewhere else if I tried it. However, that also means that I can say:
No responsibility is taken for anything on this site damaging your computer, social life, family or mental health.
No animals were intentionally harmed in the making of this web site, although my hamster died and my friend ran over a rat called Fluffy.
Legal Note:
No Gravity Productions is a non-corporate, multi-national, holding, subsiduary, sattalite, mutal non-trust company; that has been completely made up by the author to make his stuff seem more professional and important and because he liked the name.