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Part Six: Final Day
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Series: Zetsumei no Yochimu
Part: Six of Six
Part Title: Final Day [unedited]
By: Shinigami Goddess (Lionna)
E-mail: shinigami_goddess@netzero.com
Rating: PG-13ish
Pairings: 3x4/4x3 (implied and hinted), 2+1 mildly
Warnings: EW has not and will not happen for this story, MAJOR Relena bashing, some language, MAJOR angst. Shonen-ai hints.
Background song: Track 14 of "Evita" CD Song: You Must Love Me. Ask me and I'll send you an MP3 of the song! :)
Started: September 12, 2000 Completed: September 19, 2000
~~~~~
The coughing in the morning was day by day getting worse and it served as a wakeup call for everyone. The first day only one of the boys would go in to help Duo up and about. As a few days passed it was crystal clear that he wouldn't be standing at all for much longer.
"Duo?" Heero asked while helping Duo up from the bed in one of the earlier days. Duo gave a weak smile. "Cut the crap, Duo."
The American still smiled weakly but bowed his head. "Gomen nasai, Heero."
He sighed and moved Duo to a sitting position before perching on the edge of the bed. "Duo…" he began, for once unsure of himself. "Listen, I know how you feel about me…"
"Oh, yeah, I kinda slipped that night, eh? Stupid pain meds." Duo chuckled softly and coughed.
Heero winced. "No, Duo, daijoubu. Really. It's just that I don't think I feel the same. I… haven't really developed emotions fully." He felt slightly embarrassed and looked away. "I've never really understood emotions. Throughout the war I began to relearn them again." A bony hand still warm with lifeblood wrapped about Heero's arm. Heero looked into the smiling face of Duo and for the first time in a long while the boy looked normal. /Duo./
"Heero, it's okay. I understand this now." He gave a smile full of content and no regrets. "Thank you for telling me." He flicked a lock of hair from Heero's eyes and laughed quietly when it fell right back into place. Heero smiled too and watched with fading hope as Duo began to look once again like the skeletal figure that a poison was devouring. His skin was even tinting a sickish gray.
Sally stopped by at least once a day and sometimes even three times. Often she'd find the boys gathered in the living room playing a board or card game. Sometimes they'd be chatting or just sitting and relaxing. Though underneath all the seemingly perfect scenes the tension was still there. It would break, as Quatre said, if anything went wrong. And much too many things could go wrong.
One morning Duo requested them all to stay in his room and just hang out and talk for the day. He snuggled up in a half-sit in the middle of his bed while the other four sat on the edge around him.
"Don't you guys ever wonder about some of the others we met during the war?" Duo questioned, putting on an inquisitive face. The others shrugged.
"We obviously know about Relena. Noin's with her, Sally's here, Catherine's at the circus and Trowa's always around her, then who's that leave?"
Heero answered for Wufei, "Dorothy and Hilde."
"Hilde is fine," Duo spoke up. "I don't know about Dorothy though. Are those loony doctors still alive?" The others exchanged weary glances. "Er… I wouldn't think they would be but…"
"They survived all the time throughout the war," Quatre pointed out. "They kept on being safe during all that time on the Lunar Base. The one I'm wondering about is Zechs. He couldn't… really be dead… could he? I don't know why it seems impossible but it does."
Heero shrugged, "He didn't seem to have much of a chance in that fight."
"But neither did you," Trowa pointed out. "He was the stronger one, you realize. You became stronger throughout that last battle though and caused the damaging hit… your last battle was still cut off." He smirked a bit with the irony. "I don't think you were ever meant to battle one another."
"Perhaps so," Heero responded with a shrug.
Duo grinned and waved a finger in Heero's face. "Tro's right, you just hate to admit someone's better than you! Hate to believe you weren't the only perfect soldier!" He laughed at the indignant look on Heero's face.
"You may think what you want," Heero growled back. "That's not it, though!" His eyebrow twitched in annoyance as Duo just smirked at him.
They talked long into the afternoon and ate dinner in Duo's room. They mentioned their thoughts on where they'd be after the war and how their ideas had completely altered. They remembered good and bad times with friends and pondered over what the others thought now. They joked and laughed; they smiled, they gossiped. They were their inner, true selves for the first time in ages. Depressing moods were cleaned away with the glad memories, and wistful regrets came with the sad.
It was a relief and blessing to have that day of bonding. And later, four of the boys might perhaps believe Duo had known somehow - known what soon was to happen. Known that soon he'd tear them apart at the seams and scatter them to the harsh wind. Perhaps he had known he needing to give at least one more good memory to their time together.
~~~
Quatre cleared away the breakfast dishes after washing and drying them. Placing them back in the cupboard, he smiled as he remembered Aika coming over the other day to talk with Duo and fill him in on how the children were doing. It had also been decided then that Aika would take over the house once… the inevitable happened. Duo had seemed only a tad wistful as he announced this but didn't seem as disturbed as perhaps others would have been.
/Such strength, no wonder he was a gundam pilot,/ Quatre thought to himself. He was going to talk with Wufei and Heero while Trowa played some chess with Duo. Later on all five would find a card game to play.
"Is he okay?" Wufei questioned with a frown as Heero shut Duo's door quietly. The Japanese boy lowered his eyes and shook his head sadly. "What's wrong…?"
"He can't hold anything down at all. He's fallen asleep. I think we should let him keep his rest," Heero replied softly. The two Asian boys headed into the living room where Trowa and Quatre were snuggled up on the couch. Wufei made a face at the two.
"Uh-uh, Wufei," Quatre grinned and wiggled a finger in the air, "no teasing!"
Wufei rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. "Whatever you say, sir. Of course, sir. I only listen to you, sir…" Again he rolled his eyes and let out a snort. Quatre grinned at him and disentangled himself from the most of Trowa's embrace.
Finally glancing over to Heero's face, Quatre frowned. "Ne, Heero, what is the matter?"
"Don't you…" Heero began. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and then attempted a small smile that only made his cheek muscles rise. "Never mind. It must be nothing if you haven't felt anything."
"No, no! Heero, what is it?" Quatre asked again, biting a lip nervously.
Heero sat down and frowned. "Can't you feel it in the air…?"
All were silent and still, as if waiting for something - a sound, smell, sight… anything to hint at what was going on. For some reason a small breeze passed through the room and climbed up Quatre's spine in a chill. Apparently it was the same for Heero for he shivered slightly. "I… think I can feel it."
~~~
Duo woke up in the early evening hours. He was rather drowsy and still not recovered from his long nap. He yawned and winced at the soreness it caused. /Damn… headache's bad…/ He shut his eyes and rested his head back more firmly in the pillow. He didn't feel like getting up yet.
The ache throughout his body was too much, his feet numb as were his hands. Something crawled up at him through his middle and was biting evilly at his chest and abdomen. He just wished it would stop so that he could rest again.
With his eyes closed, everything was dark and blocked out. He didn't have to see reality - or not usually at least. As he lay there, flashes of blue crossed his `inner-sight' under closed eyelids. He frowned and opened his eyes but his room was comfortably dark.
He closed his eyes again and waited. This time the blue flashed followed by red, and brown, and black, and white… the colors began spinning quickly and taking on blob-like forms of objects and eyes. Slowly be began to see the repeat of his friend's faces.
Trowa staring at him with cool eyes of green, one covered with long, brown bangs. Quatre gazing worriedly with crystalline eyes and a strand of blonde getting in the way. Wufei and his hard, yet concerned ebony look with no hair marring his bronze face. Heero with his cobalt blue and locks of messy-brown hair that slightly obscured his features.
Duo thrashed about on bed as best he could, but he felt so weak and his eyes did not want to open. /Nnn… what is this?/ He was spinning within colors again and this time he found himself staring at the outline of Deathscythe Hell. The tall gundam's dark wings cast deep shadows bringing the ominous feeling of death and destruction. The outline changed, growing smaller and slimmer.
To the figure of a human wearing billowing robes of gray and black. Lavender eyes pierced out from a shaded face and dark, dark hair of brown in shoulder length blew about the face. A hand produced a staff and held it out, offering to pull Duo in. Duo stared, wondering now if he was a dream. He reached and paused. His hand again moved, but of its own accord. Worried, Duo tried to pull back but couldn't make himself.
Slowly the struggle fell from his face and his lips parted in amazement as he touched the dark staff. His fingers glowed gold and the shine traveled throughout his body, filling him and making him gasp for air. Everything about him exploded into silver particles and he felt himself being pulled sharply into pain.
He found himself awake and leaning painfully on his elbows with his head thrown back in a silent scream of pain. Duo leaned against the headboard, panting heavily in the air of the night. It was dark and obviously night as he tried to gather his senses. A glance at the clock confirmed his believes. It was the first time that he had woken around midnight.
He assumed the others were still up, they usually mentioned talking late into the night. He grimly smiled but winced as a bout of pain took him. His chest ached and he felt like he was being ripped apart. It was as if his vocal cords were ripped from his throat, though, and he wasn't able to voice anything.
He began to cry, tears rolling down his cheeks and glistening in the dark. He couldn't make a sound even though he desperately wanted to. He had wanted to say goodbye, explain what he wanted. He'd -
But the pain was moving to his abdomen and putting flames to his mid section. Weak, thin fingers gripped at the wood of a bedpost but he couldn't grab. He slipped, falling silently to his knees on the floor with his body pressed awkwardly against the side of the bed. He couldn't feel anything and he felt dazed.
His pupils were dilated and his breathing harsh. His arms and legs were numb and soon he couldn't even feel air filling his throat. Wondering what was wrong with him, Duo closed his eyes. If he could just sleep he'd be okay… he'd get his strength back. He smiled over the intense pain that was being driven like a stake repeatedly into his chest. He closed his eyes.
Within the dark of Duo's bedroom the harsh sounds of intake and outtakes of air sped up to an abnormal speed. With not even a second, silence droned the room and deafened any listening. Cloth against cloth sounded and a very dull thump hit the ground as a weak body began to grow chill.
~~~
Quatre screamed.
Wufei was in the middle of a sentence and suddenly the scream escaped the blonde's mouth as he collapsed to the floor and began gripping at his chest. "NANI?! Quatre! Daijoubu?! QUATRE!" Trowa shouted, shaking his lover that wouldn't stop.
It hit suddenly and Trowa was up on his feet and leaping over the couch in a fluid movement in a matter of seconds. Heero was close behind, heart racing and fear choking his throat. Trowa was the first within the bedroom and the lights were immediately turned on.
He didn't even bother going in.
Duo was collapsed on the floor at an odd angle and was completely still. Everything just seemed to freeze as Quatre's screams died. Trowa turned away and walked calmly down the hall back to his lover. His chin was shaking with the suppressed tears, however. Wufei had also guessed and was already sitting with his face hidden.
Heero stayed just outside the doorway with absolutely no feeling whatsoever. His limbs were numb, his body seemed nothing, not even a mist. He couldn't feel anything, physically or emotionally. His vision fogged around the only clear shape in the room - Duo's body. It was slumped and obviously had been previously been in pain.
The Japanese boy's fingertips touched the door handle and closed the door and turned the lights off. He didn't even realize he was doing anything or that tears were streaming from his eyes as his mouth hung open a gape. He walked like a robot and didn't focus on anything. He walked into the living room and just stopped, denying. No one dared to look at him.
He fell. He couldn't hold it anymore. Heero went to his knees and curled up as he sobbed and cursed the whole world and the Romerfellar Foundation. His tears never seemed to stop, burning onto his cheeks like permanent scars.
~~~
No one had strength to move let alone announce the news. It was nearly two in the afternoon of the next day when Wufei got himself to call Sally. She took the news with a pained expression and whispered an apology.
The boys remained in the living room in various positions. Quatre curled up beside Trowa on the couch, both fairly still and silent. Wufei was sitting in a meditative position and was tuned out from his surroundings, needing the escape. Heero sat off on his own, staring at the far wall with his hands clasped in his lap. His eyes were large and empty as if the life had been sucked from him.
The house was a pressing silence that nothing could break.
Aika and Sally came over later within the afternoon but no one could force themselves to speak. It wasn't until the next day that notice of the ex-gundam pilot's death was sent out to the various odd-and-end friends they had picked up during the war.
Throughout the whole time, everyone moved with lethargic and robotic movement. Everything seemed more automatic than anything. Quatre prepared the meals but would stop nearly every other minute as he reminded himself he need not prepare a pain pill in any of the dishes. Had to repeatedly remember the morning when Duo joyfully went about looking for what to cook for everyone.
Tears were shed when one was private. Matters were slowly taken care of in impervious moods. After long days last details were taken care of and notices were once again sent off. Aika moved her few positions into the house with the help of Sally. The four ex-pilots packed their own things and cleaned up the house while figuring out what to leave of Duo's things.
Aika, Sally, and the remaining pilots stood before the house and stared at it in silence as memories flooded back. Duo jogging along the path, children standing by the door and cheering when Duo stepped out…
Almost reluctantly, as if this was admitting the truth, they turned once again and headed to the space port where they would be taking a shuttle to Earth. This would be goodbye.
And up in the man-made sky of the colony of L2, clouds moved slowly and filled with tears as they realized the loss. There had been no actual good-byes verbally spoken. Indigo eyes teared sadly as lips turned upward in a parting smile.
~~~ Owari ~~~
Hilde: We have all been informed of the departure of a great friend. Partings are sad but necessary.
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