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Deciding
"Deciding"                                        1999-10-22
     AN: this is very short. Something I just came up with for fun and slightly a test… stick with me all the way through okaies? ^_^ I'm using a TON of Japanese in here… don't ask me why… just felt like I was up to finally using some Japanese that I know. (no, I don't have everything memorized, I have a nice handy-dandy printout from the net.)
     Oh yeah, this is partially alternate-reality. There *are* however Senshi though they aren't like exactly the same. (as in Mamo-chan and Usa do not know about Crystal Tokyo I'm not even sure if I'd be having one in this story either…)
Disclaimer: Sailor Moon no mine.
          By: Sailor ClearMoon a.k.a. Princess Lionna

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
     Why couldn't she decide? Why couldn't she end everything now? Usagi ran to the park and didn't ever stop, she walked on as evening fell and the sunset. She walked as dinnertime ended. She continued to walk and think. Her thoughts jumbled and confused.
     <They've all returned after three years…> one name flashed through her mind, <Seiya…> shaking her head again, Usagi scolded herself.
     "What can I do?!" She cried to the sky, "Mother… who is it?"
     No answer came and finally Usagi sank to the ground.  "Mamo-chan or Seiya…" she trailed off. She had started to grow out of the habit of crying all the time, yet this time she was so confused she didn't know what else to do.
     "How can I decide? What am I supposed to do?"
     Suddenly Usagi remembered something that her mother had mentioned earlier, 'And your aunt in Paris said that you could come visit soon!'
     That's what she'd do… quickly she stood up and ran back to her house. Once she was safely in her own room, Usagi locked the door and kneeled down by her study table. She took out her crescent-moon-bordered stationary and began to write:
 'Dear Mamo-chan,
     I know this may sound completely strange, but I must get away for a while. Senshi business has slowed so I do not believe that I am needed here for now. I'll be visiting my aunt in Paris for a while, just remember that I'll be back soon. I need to think some things over if you're wondering why I'm so desperate to leave. Later I will explain.
          Aishiteru Mamo-chan,
               Usa'
     Usagi took out another piece of paper and pondered what to write finally she just wrote as it came to her:
 `Seiya,
     I cannot forget the day that you told me you cared for me… you have begun to get me wondering about some things as you and the Starlights have returned to Tokyo. I need to think things through so I am going to Paris to visit my aunt. I'll be back soon, please say you'll still be here.
          Ai,
             Usa'
     She sealed the letters in separate envelopes and quickly jotted down the address for each. Finally she went downstairs and told her family that she would love to visit Paris…
                         §
     Mamoru stared at the letter in front of him, rereading it again. He hadn't believed the senshi when they had told him Usagi had suddenly left, <Usako…> he thought.
     "Why did you need to be alone? I could have helped you…" he murmured. Whatever was bothering her had to be big.
     "Aishiteru, Usako… aishiteru."
                         §
     Seiya was sitting in his bedroom since Taiki and Yaten were in the other room fighting, as usual. As he reread the letter he couldn't understand everything, <Have I somehow confused Odango that much? I thought for sure she wouldn't leave Mamoru's side… does she really know how much I care for her? >
     "Odango… why do you run to hide?" he heard a loud crash from the other room and Seiya winced, "Aishiteru, Odango… Usa…"
     "TAIKI-SAN! YATEN-SAN! What did you do?!" Seiya cried.
     "Uh… um…" came Yaten's voice, "the lamp kinda fell over?"
     "Shimata…" Seiya muttered while locking away Usagi's letter.
                         §
<<<Six months later>>>
     Usagi sighed as she exited the airport. She took a taxi to her house and her parents greeted her warmly. Ikuko, though, noticed something wrong, "Usa, doo shitan desu ka?"
     "Ano…" Usagi started, "I just have something to do… Itte kimasu!"
     "Okay, Usa, just be home soon!"
                         §
     Usagi ran as fast as she could, she needed to get everything said before she lost the nerve to do so. Her first stop was the Starlights were staying. She silently prayed that Taiki and Yaten would be out, but as she knocked on the door she heard Taiki calling.
     In reply she called, "Tadaima!"
     "Usagi-chan! Okaerinasai!"
     "Arigatou Taiki-san, is Seiya-san here?" Usagi asked.
     "Hai, come in," Taiki told her, "watch out for Yaten-san, he hasn't shut up ALL morning!" Usagi laughed lightly as she waited just inside the door to the apartment. "Seiya-san!" Taiki shouted as he walked towards the bedrooms.
     Usagi faintly heard a reply then some noise, "Usagi-chan! Hisashiburi desu ne! Yoku irasshiaimasta!"
     "Hai," was her reply as she smiled. "Seiya-san, could I please talk to you alone for a while?"
     Seiya looked at her strangely before turning to Yaten and Taiki who were now standing and watching, "Sayonara Taiki-san, Yaten-san!"
     "Nani?"  Yaten asked, "Why should we go?" Taiki leaned over and whispered something into his ear. A look of understanding and amusement played across Yaten's face, "Sore dewa…"
     Usagi blushed slightly, "Yaten-san…" she growled. Finally Yaten and Taiki went out into the hallway and then down to the main floor to take a walk.
     "Ara?" Seiya prompted.  
     "Saa…" Usagi wasn't sure where to start. "You did get my letter, Iie?"
     "Hai…"
     "Saa… I've decided after thinking things through what I want…"
     Seiya looked at her, "Nani?"
     Usagi looked slightly up at him, "Seiya…" she started, "I've decided on something I'm not sure is right or not…"
     "Continue…"
     "Ai- aishiteru… Seiya-san…" Usagi bit her lip in fear.
     Seiya stared at her with his mouth half-open, "Yoi!" [I'm so glad!]
     Usagi snapped her head up, "Nani?"
     "Yoi!" Seiya repeated, smiling. Usagi grinned back, her face fell though as she remembered Mamoru. "Daijobu Usa-chan?"
     "Daijobu…" was the dazed response, "I must talk to Mamo-chan though…"
     "Oh!" Seiya looked at her with worry, "so what did you mean?"
     "What I mean is… I… love both of you… I don't know what to do! I was so confident and now…" Usagi trailed off. She looked up into Seiya's once hopeful and happy eyes now turned confused and disappointed. "Ojama shimashita…ja ne…"
     "Matte! Usa!"
     She was already gone though and Seiya wore a worried frown as Taiki and Yaten came in to find out what was wrong.
                         §
     "Naze?"  Usagi asked aloud, "I go away to think about it… I come up with my decision and then I can't even follow through! It's not fair! Naze?"
     Usagi shook her head, she wasn't ever sure if she'd be able to decide. If she chose one, then the other would be hurt. She didn't know what to do. "Mother… I don't know what to do… I can't decide…" softly she added, "I won't decide…"
     "Aishiteru Mamo-chan… aishiteru Seiya…" Usagi looked up at the almost cloudless sky. Though a beautiful day she hardly noticed. "Naze?"
~~~~~~~
The End
~~~~~~~

AN: "THE END??????" is that what you're all thinking? Well that's what I'm thinking but hey, I don't really care! Anyone want to continue with this? I mean it's a weird story but again I'm into the Seiya-Usagi-Mamoru thingie… ^_^
Here's translation for you poor unfortunate ones with lil' knowledge of Japanese (like most of us, ne?):

Senshi = soldier/warrior/sailor scout
Aishiteru = "I love you"
Ai = "love"
Ai no senshi = "soldier of love"
Odango = dumpling/dumpling head
Shimata = damn/oops
Doo shitan desu ka = "What happened" "what's the matter?"
Ano… = "um…;er…;well"
Itte kimasu = "good bye! (and I'll be back)"
Tadaima = "Hello! (I'm back)"
Okaerinasai = "Hello! (welcome back)"
Arigatou = "thanks"
Hai = "yes"
Hisashiburi desu ne = "it's been a long time (since I saw you last)"
Yoku irasshiaimasta = "welcome!" "I'm glad you could come!"
Sayonara = "good bye"
Nani = "what?"
Sore dewa = "well then; in that case"
Ara = "huh?"
Saa… = "gee…; well…"
Iie = "no"
Yoi = "I'm so glad"
Daijobu = "what's wrong"/ "I'm fine"
Ojama shimashita = "I'm sorry to have bothered you"
Ja ne = "good bye"/ "bye"
Matte = "wait"
Naze  = "why?"