A Whole New Life Part 4

A Whole New Life
Part 4: More Trouble
By SJ 12-23-01/ (skyjade@globetrotter.net)

________________
Disclaimers: Nothing in the Star Wars Universe belong to me; everything belongs
to George Lucas. I'm only writing stories for fun.
See my homepage for more details.
http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Quasar/3702

Special thanks to my shy, secret beta-reader and best friend, Adrianne, for her
help with the final editing of my new stories. Thanks for giving
me some of your precious time, my friend :)

WARNING: this part also deals with terrorism; you are warned.

__________________

Luke was still weeping, more out of tiredness than anything else, when his
nearby comm station went off with a priority one signal.

For a moment, he stared at the turned-off device, debating with himself if he
wanted to answer it or not, then berated himself for a lazy Hutt if he didn't
get up and fight. He tiredly pushed himself off the couch, then straightened
and dried his eyes on his way to the comm.

"Skywalker," he answered the moment the screen lit up--- He took a step back in
shock as he identified who was calling him.

"Not so victorious now, 'Skywalker', are you?" Mara sneered at him, her eyes
blazing with barely contained anger.

"Mara?" he gasped in disbelief. "What--- Why--- How---" he stuttered
incoherently, a thousand questions pressing themselves into his mind.

He hadn't expected her to contact him, let alone on a military, top-secret and
internal frequency.

"I hope you're happy of your 'peace and justice', Skywalker," she snarled,
ignoring his attempt to figure the reason of her call.

"Do I look happy?" he asked her forlornly, then locked his gaze with hers. "Why
are you calling me?"

His friend eluded his question and instead asked him a new one.

"Do you know how many innocents died today because of your 'coup'?" she inquired
lowly.

"Too many," he answered seriously.

"Ten thousand three hundred and fifty three souls," she retorted coldly,
providing him with the exact number. Before he could answer something to this,
she spat: "You're worse than the Emperor was, 'Jedi'."

"Hey," he objected, suddenly having enough of being insulted for something which
he 'was' trying to fix. "First, I am not 'behind' those orders like Palpatine
was, and second, I'm working on it, okay."

Mara haughtily raised her chin in answer; her shoulders came into range of the
comm video... and he noticed for the first time that she was draped in one of
his former black cloak and cowl.

'What looked like a woman dressed in black,' the report had said---- Suddenly
understanding what was going on, he steadied his stance and straightened to his
full height.

"Where are you at the moment?" he inquired seriously.

"Cleaning up Ord Mantell," she answered shortly, then challenged him with her
eyes to berate her for her actions.

He rose up to the challenge.

"Then you too are responsible for the death of innocents, Jade," he stated
coldly, pointedly reminding her of the peace volunteers she had coldly killed
throughout the past days.

"At least I'm doing something about it, Jedi," she countered caustically. "What
about you? Are you, yes or no, going to put an end to this chaos?"

For a moment, Luke could only glare at her. How dared she scold him for what
was going on? He 'was' trying to stop it.

"If you noticed, Jade," he finally begun with some animosity, "the situation
'is' improving, although slowly---"

"Well, do it faster then," his girlfriend interjected rudely.

"It's not that easy," he retorted instantly, slowly growing irritated with her
patronizing attitude. "Unlike you," he said, pointing an accusing finger at
her, "I don't want to kill those people... not all of them at any rate," he
finished more somberly, lowering his hand back to his side.

Even though Mara was furious at her ex-lover, at this very moment, she felt her
anger falter thanks to his genuine earnestness to keep the damage to a minimum.

For a brief instant, their eyes met--- she swiftly averted his gaze to avoid
more bad surprises from her call. She had meant to berate him, to insult him
until he admitted his mistake, but the moment that he had answered her call, her
resolve had lessened in intensity.

Still, she reminded herself with professional pride, she had not shown him any
kindness nor compassion; everything that was currently going wrong in the galaxy
was 'his' fault.

'He' was responsible for the death of those children and innocent citizens, she
reminded herself for the tenth time since he had appeared on the screen. 'He'
alone carried the weight of those wasted lives. 'He' had to pay for them.

Considering that she couldn't kill him, she had decided to torment his 'kind'
soul by not showing him 'any' mercy, but, she conceded reluctantly, the more she
was speaking with him, and the more difficult it was for her to keep this kind
of attitude.

While she made sure to avoid directly gazing into his eyes, she took advantage
of her call to study him. He looked tired, she noticed once again as her eyes
encountered lines around his eyes. He also seemed deeply concerned about what
was going on everywhere around them. Not really surprising, she dimly admitted
to herself; she didn't need any proof that he cared about the others. Their
friendship had been her first proof... and the last one had been his sister's
corruption of him. Feeling a fresh surge of frustration at this thought, she
averted his features completely and looked at the rest of what she could see on
her screen. As she focused on his bare chest, she belatedly noticed the bacta-
bandage which was loosely wrapped around his biceps.

Her natural instinct was to worry about him--- but she caught herself and told
herself that it was only his due for what he had caused.

"Your good heart is your weakness, Skywalker," she finally commented in the long
silence that had just stretched between them. "You won't get anywhere with
that, nor will the galaxy."

She discovered that Luke wouldn't listen to her this time.

"And I suppose that the Emperor achieved much with his slavery?" he spat
defiantly at her even as he crossed his arms across his bare chest. "Open your
eyes, Mara," he then continued more beseechingly at her, "the only ones to blame
for the current losses of lives are slaves who don't want their freedom."

Instantly recognizing herself in his description, she looked up at him and
pinned him with one of her deadliest glare.

"We were happy and content with our lives, Jedi. Who were you to decide what
was best for the rest of the galaxy?" she asked him vehemently.

When her ex-companion remained silent, she knew that she had stung him where it
hurt. However, her victory was short-lived.

"I did what I felt was best," he answered, then continued despite her snort of
derision: "and I'll continue to do so. I could use your help if you want to put
an end to the violence."

"So that you don't have to see action yourself, Skywalker?" she sneered at him.
"Think again."

For a long moment, they both gazed defiantly at one another, then Luke nodded in
acceptance of her decision; he shifted on the screen, obviously reaching forward
to terminate the communication.

"Take care of yourself then, Mara... and," he added hesitantly, "beware the Dark
Side."

Then he was gone before she could shoot more insults his way.

Distraught and angered by his last statement, she flicked her own comm off, then
turned away from it and clenched her fists. Who was he to tell her what to do?
He couldn't even choose a workable path of action for himself, she wanted to
send to him through their remaining bond, so how could he even think that he
could dictate her actions to her?

At least, she reflected in dark satisfaction, she now knew now what he was
planning.

Nothing.

Chaos would continue to reign where peace used to be; farmboy just wasn't strong
enough to rule an Empire. Well that had got to hurt, she thought meanly as she
pulled her hood over her head once again and headed out of her ship. She had
more 'hunting' to do.

On Coruscant, Luke gazed for a long time at the silver screen where the image of
his lover had been.

She was slipping toward the Dark Side. Something had happened to her since he
had last seen her, and instead of refraining her anger, she had given in. He
also understood that her powers had somehow been restrained by their late
slaver. She could now be a full-fledged Jedi Knight... or she could very well
become a new Dark Jedi and threaten the galaxy instead of helping it.

No, he denied the vision that then came to him. It was impossible. He turned
his thoughts to the Force and asked if had he broken free from the Dark Side
only to end up facing his girlfriend in a life or death duel? Surely, he tried
to reassure himself, it wouldn't come to that. What would be the point? His
love for her had saved him... why wouldn't it be the same for her.

He knew that she still loved him, he reminded himself hopefully. She might not
have been aware of it, he conceded, but he had seen it in her eyes. No, he
shook his head in new denial, Mara wouldn't become a full-fledged dark Jedi; her
heart was too good for her to give into this lie again. Wasn't it??.. he asked
once again to the unseen Force and his sister's spirit. No one answered him.

Disappointed, he closed his eyes and lowered his chin to his chest. Well, then,
he decided, he himself would make sure that his dear Mara wouldn't fall to the
darkness. He would monitor her very closely just in case he needed to seek her
out to extinguish her dark fire before it was too late.

In the meantime though, he admitted that her stinging remark had started him
thinking again and he now knew how he could put an end to the riots and
terrorist actions. It would be long and time consuming, he thought glumly, but
as he had told her, they were not the Empire anymore.

He sent a message to the Freedom, then prepared himself for a long leave from
Coruscant.

******

Unaware of his son's difficulties, Anakin concentrated on his piloting.

He had been following his instinct for a few days now, setting courses through
hyperspace while never really knowing where he was going. The only thing he
knew for sure was that the Force was guiding him, although through curvaceous
paths.

With no other option available, he had decided to seek Master Yoda, aware that
it might be a dead-end but he was unwilling to give up just yet. Besides, he
had reminded himself, he couldn't heal himself; his healing powers had been
tainted by the Dark Side for too long.

Of course, he conceded as he prepared to exit hyperspace, he didn't know if Yoda
would be able to help him, or even if he would accept to help him, but he was
his only hope. He wouldn't give it up.

A proximity alarm suddenly went off; he took hold of the hyperspace levers and
gently pulled them down. His shuttle re-entered normal space--- in sight of a
greenish brown world.

Dagobah, he realized in slight stupor. Up to now, he hadn't 'really' believed
that he would find it, but now, he knew exactly what he was nearing: the hiding
place of the greatest Jedi Master ever. With only a slight hesitation, he
adjusted the course of his shuttle and began his descent.

While he monitored his instruments, more out of habit than true necessity, he
reached out to locate the master's presence; he didn't feel anything. Puzzled,
he tried again, with the same results--- then his ship suddenly bucked as its
engines died while its scopes went totally dead.

Cursing under his breath, Anakin took a firmer hold on the navigation stick,
then reached out and toggled the ignition switch with the Force to 'reanimate'
his ship. He knew that he needed at least the repulsors to manage some kind of
landing. His shuttle remained unresponsive.

Meanwhile, the landscape in the viewport remained dangerously clouded, keeping
him from estimating how far he was from the ground--- Suddenly feeling imminent
danger, he switched his focus outside of the shuttle and worked on slowing down
his descent with the help of the Force. He first tried to pull on the hull of
the ship, then, when it didn't work, to apply a resistance under it--- Then he
hit a sturdy obstacle and could only brace himself for a crash landing.

Between his own personal shield and the ship's shield, he managed to remain
conscious enough to avoid serious injuries, but he wasn't aware anymore when the
shuttle began to sink in the unstable ground.

******

Meanwhile, oblivious to his father's predicament, Luke rejoined his flagship The
Freedom. Unlike his first visit after their bitter-sweet victory, troops
weren't gathered to welcome him; only his first admiral, a few officers and a
platoon of volunteers were present.

While he reflected that it was still too much considering the 'great' results
that he had gotten so far, he conceded that he would have to accept it as
necessary for the troops.

"Welcome back, Sir," Piett saluted him.

"What is the status of Devarona?" he asked without preamble, inviting his
officers to walk with him.

"The riots are still going on, Sir," an officer answered seriously. "We
informed Commander Mabar that we would rejoin her in ten hours. For the moment,
her volunteers and troops have managed to keep the trouble from growing, but
they can't stop it anymore."

"Did she use the shield tactic?" he queried, turning toward his tactician.

"Her ship didn't have the resources, Sir. We had counted on the local allies to
help her," he reminded him.

"Did they give any reason why they don't want to get involved?" he inquired as
his group entered the main corridor that led to a bank of turbolifts.

His public relation expert spoke up.

"They say that they will suffer even more damage if they get involved with us,
Sir," the newly promoted woman told him professionally. "They gave us some
information about the identity of the groups that were responsible for the
trouble, but they stopped all cooperation after another attack."

"Understandable," he nodded, then stepped in the lift. "We have ten hours to
prepare for this, lady and gentlemen," he began coolly. "When we leave
Devarona's sector, it must be safe again. I will meet all of you in three hours
in my quarters to discuss our options."

The others saluted, then he was alone and winded down. The game was set now.
He had returned aboard his ship and would take his hand-picked troops from
besieged planet to besieged planet, and he 'would' restore peace and justice on
each one of them.

Personally.

If he couldn't do it from Coruscant, he reflected once again, then he would do
it his own way, in the thick of the action. It wouldn't take more time than if
he were to rely on politics anyway, he shrugged slightly, and even better, he
knew that it would show his true commitment to the population; he would also be
able to discuss senatorial matters with the local governments during the clean-
up procedures.

Perhaps then, he thought glumly, he would have an idea as to how to proceed with
this next step which would bring him one step closer from withdrawing from the
political spotlight.

******

On Dagobah, Anakin slowly woke up, groaning as a herd of banthas desperately
tried to trundle their way out of his skull. What happened?, he wondered
confusedly. Slowly, he called up his most recent memories.

The long flight in hyperspace... the arrival on Dagobah--- the crash landing, he
suddenly remembered even as a surge of adrenaline invaded his senses. The ship
hadn't exploded yet, but it still might, he reminded himself even as he strove
to recover his senses.

Slowly testing himself to identify injured limbs, he opened his eyes and rolled
on his side, then used a nearby seat to pull himself to a sitting position. He
then glanced up at the viewport--- and froze. The shuttle wouldn't explode
anytime soon, he surmised, but it was sinking under the ground.

Instantly jumping to his feet, he called his lightsaber to his hand, then jumped
and slashed the ceiling open. Dirt immediately found its way inside the ship;
Anakin ignored it, focused his strength once again and jumped. He cleared
himself from the sinking ship, then closed his blade and caught hold of a tree
branch that was some ten meters above his crashing site.

There, he hung from his left hand. When he glanced under him, he was just in
time to watch the tip of the highest fin of the shuttle disappear as the planet
'ate' the whole ship. Wherever he was, he reflected grimly, he was here to
stay. As if to contradict him, his chosen branch suddenly gave slightly under
him, dipping him back toward the 'hungry' ground.

Still hanging from one hand only, Ani quickly studied his options and chose one.
He stuffed his weapon in his belt, then took hold of his temporary refuge with
his two hands and gathered an impulse; he swiftly swung himself back and forth
until he felt that he had built up enough speed, then swung himself forward one
last time, and let go of the branch. With a nudge of the Force, he balled up
and tumbled in the air until he opened up once again; he landed a good fifteen
meters away from the dangerous area.

He turned around to gaze one last time at his lost ship. Luke wouldn't be
happy, he reflected glumly, then felt a new pang of regret at the thought of his
son. He hadn't meant to abandon him again, he comforted himself as he turned
away from the sight of where his sole mean to return to him had been. He hadn't
wanted to leave like a coward instead of facing the upcoming hardships with him.

How was he doing?, he found himself wondering as he began to pick his way
through the surrounding marsh. Was he finally enjoying a much deserved rest?
Or were thing worse than worst? Whichever it was, he wasn't about to find out,
he reflected glumly as he stopped to survey his new surroundings.

Everywhere he gazed, he saw mist-blanketed, strangely twisted trees which were
growing from the muddy ground. When he reached out with the Force, he could
feel life around himself, but no Jedi Master... and no tug in the Force to guide
him onward. As if, he suddenly reflected, the Force had brought him here only
to leave him on his own...

A condemnation for life, he understood, feeling his hopes dwindle even as his
regret and guiltiness resurfaced to torment him. Suddenly bereft of his sole
reason to keep going, his hopes, he sat down on a nearby rock, then bowed his
head until he could bury it in his gloved hands. He should have known, he
thought sadly, glumly, in defeat... There was no other issue for him but to be
left alone with his past and his mistakes.

He didn't move from his chosen rock for a long, long time...
He wanted to die.

******

In transit toward Devarona, Luke finished his meeting with his advisors, then
motioned to Piett to stay for a longer while; he had to discuss about something
in private with him. The older man remained in his seat while he himself stood
up and stretched, working out the cramps which were resulting for hours of
planning.

"Do you think it will work?" he asked his admiral.

"Your strategy worked well everywhere else, Sir," Piett answered him
respectfully. "With you on the field as well, I can't see how we cannot
succeed."

Luke gave him a slightly amused glance at this, remembering their earlier
debates about his taking part to the 'battles'. Piett and Theen had argued that
he couldn't risk himself like this, but himself and his two other head officers
had reminded them that he wouldn't be useful if the renegades continued to make
trouble.

"I just hope that the enemy hasn't developed a counter-attack to it," he
admitted, gauging his admiral's reaction to his admission that he was worried
about something.

As he had expected, the other was surprised, but he had been in the imperial
army for too long to allow himself much reaction. Hence, Luke waited for him to
express himself.

After a continued silence, the other finally understood this and spoke up.
"Even... if they have, Sir," he began hesitantly, "you will be backed by the
specially equipped TIE fighters and the waiting reinforcement."

"Well, that's the idea at least," Luke agreed before he sat back at the planning
table, locking his gaze with the one man he trusted almost as implicitly as he
trusted his father. "However, if you feel or see anything that makes you doubt
this, Admiral, I want you to follow your instincts and override the chain of
command," he told him, dead serious.

Despite his rigorous training, Piett's jaw hit the top of the table even as he
worked hard to cover his improper reaction.

"Sir?" he finally asked.

"I trust you, Piett," Luke explained simply, "otherwise, I wouldn't have chosen
you as admiral of the entire fleet. You have experience, and you know the
troops abilities better than anyone else involved in this operation. If you
detect a clue that our current strategy and back-ups won't suffice," he repeated
his previous order, "I want you to override everything. Only restoring safety
matters here."

"But, Sir..." the older man began instantly.

Luke glanced at him with a raised eyebrow, expressing his quiet confidence that
this decision was the right one to make at the moment.

"I... I know that you chose me because of this, Sir," Piett began formerly, "and
I am honored to have your trust, but... I... I can't overrule your orders. I
can only execute them, I---"

"You will have a wider point of view than I will during the battle, and you have
more experience than even Commander Mabar does. The tide of the battle will
rest with you more than anybody else, Admiral," Luke finished seriously,
emphasizing the man's title.

Aware that the other man was growing used to the looser protocol around him,
Luke almost smirked when the other gaped more openly at him, struck speechless
by his statement.

"Up to now, you have done a very good job overseeing the procedures of our first
strategy, but it is now time to do more, Admiral," the youth informed him as he
stood to his feet. "It is time for you to truly use your whole potential
because we need it, all of us." The other remained silent, still under shock.
"I don't read minds, Piett," Luke informed him seriously, "but I know that you
have ideas, here," he commented, tapping the side of his head with his right
index, "and that your decisions are led by what you feel, here," he finished,
indicating his own heart. "For years now, you have been prohibited from using
those, but I can feel, as evidently as I can see you, that it is time to pull
free from those 'bonds' and fulfill your destiny."

The older man was still silent, but he nodded slightly as he understood where he
was going with this.

"You don't need to have special powers to develop your potential, Sir. All you
have to do," the young Jedi thought wistfully as he dimly remembered his own
training, "is to free your mind from old beliefs and use it."

He fell silent; only the low buzzing of the nearby holo projection answered him.
In front of him, Piett lowered his eyes, obviously taking a moment to reflect on
his words.

Luke gave him that moment, and even an extra one.

Finally, the other slowly stood to his feet, then squared his shoulders and
gazed up at him.

"I will be ready for trouble, Sir," he answered as steadily as he could, "and I
will modify our strategy if need be."

Luke smiled at him, then offered him his hand for a shake. The other seemed to
hesitate, then he firmly took hold of it.

"I knew I could count on you, Admiral," the young Jedi told him seriously, then
let go of his hand. "I will inform the rest of the officers of this new
procedure."

As expected, the other's eyes widened slightly as he realized that it wasn't
just a one time thing, then he snapped to attention and saluted him.

"Thank you, Sir," Piett told him, then when Luke nodded, left the room.

Now, the youth thought to himself, what remained to be seen is if he himself
would be able to allow his full potential to come through.

He hadn't said so to Piett, but it was more easily said than done.

******

After leaving Ord Mantell, Mara decided to continue on her private war/defense.
She had nothing else to do, and she knew that she was useful to the regular
population. Hence, she watched the news to select a new destination... then
programmed her destination in her computer.

Devarona.

The small, insignificant world was under siege and unlike other worlds, the
situation was truly explosive, barely in control of the traitors who were under
the orders of her ex-lover.

The citizens there had already suffered from both riots and a few terrorist
attacks, more designed to keep the authorities from joining the traitors than to
truly hurt innocents, she understood as she read on her reports. Well, she
admitted that she agreed with that; the traitors didn't need more allies, she
reflected as she stood up and took off her cloak.

As she did so, she dimly reflected that she still didn't know why she had taken
to it as quickly as she had, but, she conceded, she loved to wear it; it seemed
to belong on her shoulders. However, it wasn't the best training attire
available, she reminded herself.

She discarded it, then absently watched it float down on the co-pilot seat---
She froze as another object caught her eye.

Luke's mother's pendant.

Just like the sight of her boyfriend had made her lose her anger both times she
had checked up on him..., so did the sight of his gift. 'I'd be honored if
you'd accept it as a gage of my enduring love for you,' he had said, perhaps not
in those words, but the message had been clear anyway.

Enduring love...

Love... The presence of the other nearby... Their shared mind... All the
time that they spent together either fighting or talking... Their love--------

NO!!!!!!!!! Her brain viciously interrupted, cutting off her train of
bittersweet thoughts. It had been a lie! Not true!, she vehemently tried to
convince herself. Just like the rest of his friendship, she then mentally
spat! ----and stopped.

Luke hadn't lied to her, she seriously reminded herself. He hadn't lied to her
when he had been seven years old, nor when they had been growing up and had
shared their impossible training, then forbidden attraction. His care for her
and his compassion hadn't been a lie, especially considering how much trouble
they had gotten him into---

It had been the true Luke, she slowly realized as the truth finally trickled
past her inner veil of lies---- then she sat down hard on the deck in disbelief,
and gaped at her mental discovery: she had it all wrong... Luke and his father
weren't traitors... They had truly saved themselves and the whole galaxy while
they were at it... Herself included...

Slowly, as the memories of the past returned to her but truthful this time, her
anger ebbed away in the wake of her re-emerging love for her boyfriend.

Luke Vader had been the lie... but plain Luke, now Skywalker... had always been
the truth, she finally understood in awe and respect. Luke had always loved and
cared; whether it had been about his father, his sister, herself... or even the
prisoners who had happened to be nearby during their operations, he had always
cared. She berated herself for not seeing those for what they were. However,
she knew that she wasn't the only one to blame... the... Emperor had more than
convinced Luke and everyone around him that his care was a bad habit... a
weakness he had to improve and strengthen.

She herself had never even suspected that he was thus unknowingly keeping a
Light Jedi alive in himself---- Suddenly, a memory of her fifteen-year-old
friend being carried out of the throne room by his father's guards came back to
her mind; the Emperor had known, she belatedly understood. He had known, had
tried to kill the Jedi in Luke, with Luke's willing cooperation, then... when it
hadn't worked... had meant to temper him by allowing them to be closer, she
realized, dumbstruck.

Somehow, she now understood, he had known that their closeness would keep her
friend in the dark side track since she would be there to keep him in there...
and if things came... to what they had come, she swallowed hard as more painful
memories resurfaced in her mind... He had meant to use her as a spy on him.

A plan, she gasped in disbelief... Then her anger grew strong and dark in her
once more: it had only been one of her master's very elaborated, evil
plans!!!!!! Everything she had always believed, and served... had been a lie..!
Everything had----

But no!, her inner self objected desperately, one thing had been true: Luke's
love for her had been true! 'They' had been truthful with one another.
However, she now understood why he had had to lie to her what he had pierced the
veil of lies; he had been saving himself from her blind... slavery, she
swallowed hard on the hated word. A slave, Luke had been right, they had all
been slaves to the Emperor. She hadn't wanted to believe it, she admitted to
herself as she buried her head in her hands in sadness, hadn't wanted to face
what she could dimly feel as the truth, but now...

Now she 'knew', she heartened herself, shoving away the clouds of despair. Now
she could make it up to her lover. She knew what she had been blind to see
while she had been under the Emperor's powers, even after his death... A death
which she was shyly beginning to enjoy. The despot had lied to her, had taken--
- How much had he taken???, she suddenly wondered, gazing up in worry even as
she searched her mind for memories 'before' the Emperor... Nothing.

Emptiness... No life... No family..., she gaped in shocked horror

For the first time in her life, she became aware that her slaver had taken
everything from her. She had never thought about this before, but now that she
was--- It downright frightened her to not be able to even remember who she had
been before he had entered her life. And unlike Luke, she didn't have...

Her suddenly tears-filled eyes reflexively fell on the communication switch of
her control board; she almost stood to her feet to call Luke and tell him what
she had just discovered... how much she needed him---- Then she stopped herself.

No, her mind seemed to tell her now, although reluctantly, she couldn't rely on
her dear lover to face the destruction left behind by the Emperor... He would
help her... but she herself still wouldn't know who she truly was. Her life
might still remain a lie. Of course, she admitted, Luke would tell her that she
was nice, compassionate, strong, and that he loved her, but he wouldn't give her
the answers she was suddenly, desperately seeking.

Was Mara Jade her real name? Were her skills natural or only the results of her
hard training with Luke? Who was she? What were her true values? What did she
really want?... And what was she supposed to be now if not an assassin or a
warrior?

The more she pondered her own identity, and the more she became aware that she
didn't want anyone to give her the answers, not even her lover. For once in her
life, she thought with a brief, silent thanks to her lover and his father, she
was the master of her life; she wanted to remain so and to decide for herself
because of what she believed in, just like Luke and his father had done while
under the yoke of the Emperor, she reflected.

At the moment, she then reflected with more determination, she believed in her
own freedom from absolutely everybody... even Luke's love although this last one
was not an easy choice.

However, she promised herself as she slowly stood up and picked up the pendant,
she would try to find a way to return to him, but on her own terms this time.
No one would ever lie to her ever again, not even herself.

"We will be together, some day, Luke," she said out loud to the pendant, then
looped it around a nearby, protruding gauge.

For the moment however, she reflected as she recovered her cooler edge, she was
bound for Denavora; she could feel a guidance in the Force that was taking her
there. She trusted it, she realized. The Force had never lied to her.

The rest though... she had much thinking to do.

TBC in part 5: Encounters

SJ: Skyjade@globetrotter.net (any positive stuff is welcome, but negative or
mean comments will be thrown down the Sarlacc's throat without being read.)