#52
“Chemical”
People wonder what these tablets I carry are.
I carry these tablets in a small, tiny jar.
The tablets are chemicals poisonous to man.
And I carry them around in a tiny can.
These chemicals will kill me if I swallow them.
I know one of these days, I will have to use them.
I will not suffer another great depression.
This time, I know better. I have learned my lesson.
There is a girl that I love that’s older than me.
If she turns me down, these tablets will be in me.
I do not want to live if I can’t be with her.
My urge to take these tablets are getting stronger.
Pretty soon I’ll ask her if she’ll go out with me.
I’ve waited for seven months. I hope she likes me.
If she doesn’t like me, then I’ll know the answer.
And, of course, I’ll swallow the chemicals for sure.
A week later. I call her on the telephone.
She gets mad at me. She wants to be left alone.
I ask her if she would want to go out with me.
She gets angry and says no, then hangs up on me.
I am heart broken. Why was she so cruel to me?
She didn’t even give me a chance to help me.
I burst into tears. Now I know that I am through.
Before I suffer, there is one thing left to do.
I pull out a chemical tablet from my jar.
I leave the other tablets sealed in the jar.
I swallow the tablet quick and I feel dizzy.
Then I fall down on the floor and my soul leaves me.
Ever since sixth grade, I have lost my will to live.
Without the one I love, there’s no reason to live.
I felt so happy when I took my final breath.
I’m glad for that chemical made for instant death.
Now I can finally rest in peace forever.
4-15-97
11:44PM
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