RIP TAYLOR IS GOD Hey! Da dee dada dee da da This is Rip Taylor Hey there sprinkle genies! Haha! Did you know that midgets make up a small percentage of the population? Hah! Not half, up to here, haha hey! Woo But seriously, don't you think it's time we had a female president? With big gazooms? Tatee tattoo tees? Tatta ta too tatas? Baba bing bangs? Big jugs, get it? Hello Dolly Is this microphone on? Hello? Anybody out there can they hear me? Somebody call my agent, my hair is lifting! Please, what am I doing here? You're probably saying to yourself "Why the HELL would a comedic virtuoso like, Rip Taylor want Anything to do with those half-witted white trash crotch goblins The Bloodhound Gang?" Oh! Well listen folks, the answer is very simple.. Haha... American cashito, dollareenies, no cheques! They paid me you hiney hopper why else? Oh I'm getting moist! I mean come on, let's face it kids, pardon me... But they are a bunch of knuckleheads! WE ARE THE KNUCKLEHEADS Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads? Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads? Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads? Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads? If you would be the peanut butter then I would play the jelly I'll peel apart your bread and then I'll penetrate your belly Your blood stains mighty bad I wash it off with Coast Now I'll take my jelly and spread it on your toast No one rhymes faster the mic is my blaster So grasp some Shasta the mighty mic master Giving ya communion with your lips on my cup Pump pump pump pump me up Now if you're the waterboy then I'm the heavyweight contender I'm gonna mix you all up like a Black And Decker blender If you would be the Telstar then I'd have to be Defender I'll be out in just four weeks I was a first offender Your a dumb ass stupid Vera and I'm the one that Flo calls Mel Puttin' holes right through your body like Harvey Keitel You're a broken down Big Wheel I'm a banana-seated Schwinn Take the butt of your gun and smash their nose in I'm a leggo-Eggo maniac I'm stickier than some Fun Tack Trip to the store and get another six pack Bomb dropping like at ground zero Like Colonel Klink is getting fucked by Hogan's Heroes Eenie meanie miney mo you took your shot you missed I wasn't a good boy this year I'm not on Santa's list I gave your girl some sausage and than I slit your wrists Now I'm taking your ass out like my name was Burgeous Meredith Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We're the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We're the knuckleheads Fast fast quick Bic like ass when ya pass gas You threw it like a girl that's why you got picked last And Mr. Easy does it never did it now did he Jesus is coming, so look busy And you and your chumps are gonna get your lumps I got the goose that laid the golden egg you got goose bumps Coz I'm black y'all, it's a fact y'all And if you try to take what's mine I'll take it back y'all I wish all skinheads smelled like Mr. Clean And that girl from Jersey really was nineteen Cause the whole damn world would be peachy keen With Rip Taylor on the cover of every magazine so go Rip Rip Rip Taylor, Rip Rip Rip Taylor Rip Taylor Rip Taylor, your girlfriend we nailed her My mom's got opposable thumbs, your mom's Weezie Jefferson I'd rather eat fresh heiny chow And I ain't crazy about no god damn butthole no how Batter roll and whip ya like a fucken' kanoli If Satan had a hockey team theni'd be the goalie Cause we're dumber than driftwood dumber than your mama Dumber than a supermodel dumber than Kwanza Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We're the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We're the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We are the knuckleheads Who's the knuckleheads? We're the knuckleheads LEGEND IN MY SPARE TIME Bloodhound Gang is here to get it on So ride on brothers, ride on Ashes to ashes and funks to funky Daddy Long Legs is a mean ass honky And Jimmy Pop ain't no heiny hobbit gaybe Ain't no big meaty chunks in my thick brown gravy Coz I'm a Loch Ness a Loch Ness a Loch Ness monster Jerry's Kids are knockin' at my door, "Could you be a sponsor?" Tiny Bubbles in my tub pull my finger Lawrence Welk If you wanna look like Rocky Dennis better drink your milk When I'm feeling Oriental I gotta rub my chin I'm gonna hold my water in like I'm Gunga Din So have a taste of my bass coz the girlies got smiles You get on my case like the Rockford Files Crazy Eddie in the slammer coz he's giving it all away John Boy in the barn with a horse in the hay No rhyme no reason no job no class And we don't go near the ghetto coz they'd shoot our ass Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Ha ha if you ain't ever been to the suburbs Don't you ever come to the suburbs Coz you wouldn't understand the suburbs Coz I'm a huskin' a huskin' a huskin' your corn I'm as deep as a plot to a gay porn So Uh-Oh Spaghettios I forgot to hide away the body I know that she's a hotty but damn that girl could party So come to me momma it ain't no crime I'm a skilled love doctor growlin', "What's your sign?" Did the Flamin' Waffle with Ho Chi Min Your girl's a dollar bill coz we don't know where she's been J.F.K.'s head's a puzzle and your woman needs a muzzle Barbara Eden in the bottle and now i'm gonna guzzle You're too what? Shy shy huh what? Hush hush yeah? I knew why Cause we're playing the Palladium can't get on Star Search Daddy Legs standing tall he can do the Funky Lurch And Jimmy Jimmy Pop is short for Jimmy Jimmy Popular You know I know you know your not the tough guy that I thought you were Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Coz I wopbobaloobop Ha cha cha chatch Come lick my balls Vive la my crotch Coz your daddy thinks I'm lazy, your momma thinks I'm crazy But neither of them know that you are carrying my baby And I'm the Amos I'm the Andy I'm the sticky Aunt Jemammy I gave you mouth to mouth like Resuscitation Annie It takes two of us to do this like Dean Martin Jerry Lewis And your throat is swollen gloryholen' ya blew us George Burns' pacemaker beats steady slow and low That's why we got more hits then a dealer at a Dead show Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time Go go yeah yeah huh what? I'm a legend in my spare time B.H.G.P.S.A The following service announcement has been brought to by An intoxicated homeless msn Brought to you by Bloodhound Gang Hate Club local 138 MAMA SAY It goes one two three when I'm kicking the funky lyrics I'm busting up vocabulary I want you all to hear it I'm busting up the rhythm coz I'm busting up the rhyme I'm kicking down the stop posts coz I wanna kicks the time I'm digging down some knowledge coz you know I never hide it When i'm pulling down your panties coz I want to get inside it Like a boa a boa a boa constrictor Gonna drop off your drawers shoot straight for your sphincter I could roll my rhymes but I would be faking Jimmy Jimmy Pop is not Jamaican J I double M Y Pop go I run the show like Don Pardo With a Bugaloo Bee on the beboo tip My hit will make you trip coz I'm quadradipped I'll do the Popeye Pluto I'll freak the funkfazooto Not Latino what I mean though fuzzy dice like Menudo Rubber baby buggy's bumpers Punky's Brewsters now I hump her With my itsy bitsy teeny weenie shrunken small white peenie So rinse spit swallow brain blank kinda hollow Not to deep leap wow oh kinda shallow Cause we're in your face like Ed Gein Purple rain purple rain Mama say mama sa mama cu sa (Mama say mama sa mama cu sa) Mama say mama sa mama cu sa (Mama say mama sa mama cu sa) Mama say mama sa mama cu sa (Mama say mama sa mama cu sa) Mama say mama sa mama cu sa (Mama say mama sa mama cu sa) Naughty by nature and white by choice And the sound of my voice makes your panties moist Coz I'm finger lickin' happy like a gay proctologist So like a dyke with hollow tits I'll rip the mike with hollow tips Yeah he's in control like Sherman Potter And I got more balls then the Harlem Globetrotters Jimmy Pop Jimmy Pop rah rah rah Mama say mama sa mama cu sa Now I'm floating out your pipes like a Village People sump pump I always take a swallow coz you know I never get enough So batter up Bruce Banner if you think you're going to measure up You can't be the top dog gotta be the Scooby Pup Step to the bass drum always gotta have fun If you add two halves you'll always get the total sum My steps are correct and my mike is always checked And when a punk is in effect you know he's gonna get wrecked I don't want to start no blasphemous rumors But I think that Sinbad's got a lousy sense of humor Little children unattended better get my poison candy Don't care about y'all as long as we feel dandy And I get the poon from Judy Blume Mr Hooper's dead so why don't you give me his broom So come on chickey baby let's go make some noise What? No I'm not the guy from the Beastie Boys Mama say mama sa mama cu sa (Mama say mama sa mama cu sa) Mama say mama sa mama cu sa (Mama say mama sa mama cu sa) Mama say mama sa mama cu sa (Mama say mama sa mama cu sa) Mama say mama sa mama cu sa (Mama say mama sa mama cu sa) KIDS IN AMERICA Lookin' out a dirty old window Down below the cars in the city go rushing by I sit here alone and I wonder why Friday night and everyone's movin' I can feel the heat but it's soothing heading down I search for the beat in this dirty town (Downtown) The young ones are goin' (Downtown) The young ones are growin' We're the kids in America whoa We're the kids in America whoa Everybody live for the music go round (round, round...) Bright lights the music gets faster Look girl don't check on your watch not another glance I'm not leavin' now honey no not a chance Hot shot (shot) give me no problems Much later baby you'll be saying never mind You know life is cruel, life is never kind (Kind hearts) We'll make a new story (Kind hearts) We'll grab it in glory We're the kids in America whoa We're the kids in America whoa Everybody live for the music go round La la la la la La la la la la Sing La la la la la La la la la la La la la Come closer honey that's better Got to get a brand new experience feeling right Oh don't try to stop baby hold me tight Outside a new day is dawning Outside suburbia's sprawling everywhere I don't want to go baby New York to East Philadelphia There's a new one comin' I warn you We're the kids in America We're the kids in America Everybody live for the music go round La la la la la La la la la la Sing La la la la la La la la la la La la la La la la We're the kids, we're the kids We're the kids in America We're the kids, we're the kids We're the kids in America We're the kids, we're the kids We're the kids in America We're the kids, we're the kids We're the kids in America We're the kids, we're the kids We're the kids in America We're the kids, we're the kids We're the kids in America Oi Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi, we're the kids in America Oi We're the kids in America Oi YOU'RE PRETTY WHEN I'M DRUNK One night me and the crew hit the road on a mission To slurp free brew and go fuzzy flounder fishin' Kayjees on the hi-fi and the keg was bottomless Until we brought Skip O' Pot2mus And Daddy's gonna get some probably underage and dumb And everybody knows that the Daddy eats his young Lupus in the lavatory making a big stink Macing up the toilet seat and pooping in the sink M.S.G.'s tanked up and wizzin' in a cup Waiting for a sprinkle genie to come and drink it up Coz I'm the one bottle willy with the 12 Horse Ale After that I get silly like Soupy Sales Now it's midnight and I'm completely boofy blitzed A six of Shlitz and the Jew brew Manischewitz With my beer-tinted glasses I'm ready to bitty battle I'm Hungry Like The Wolf but I'll end up tending cattle Coz you're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk) Here she comes, a funky fried cutie Mr Jimmy Pop Ali is gonna get some booty Coz I'm Mr McFeelie with a speedy delivery You'd think I was a ditch the way this chick was diggin' me But maybe I should check and see if this is where I wanna be Hey Lupus is she cute? Yeah for a pygmie Aw! What do you know? You're probably going home alone And it wouldn't be the first time that I gave a dog a bone Plus beauty, it's only skin deep It's in the eye of the beholder and my beholder's about to tweak I could tap that barrel, in fact I know I can It's a msnags a trois you and me and Heineken Cause you're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk) Regrets I've had a few First and foremost I'd like to mention you For the sake of conversation we'll call you the Brand New Heavy Your a mix between an Ugnaut and Eugene Levy You can call it big-boned, I prefer to call it gut You're Buddha you're Shamu you're Jabba the fuckin' Hutt You had harpoon scars and your boobies were hairy I smelt tuna melt but I wasn't gonna worry It was 3 A.M. and I wasn't gettin' squat So I rolled you up in flour and aimed it for the wet spot I was buttering rolls like a soup kitchen Christian Then it hit me something bit me while my little rod was fishin' I was deep sea fishing I took a fat chance But how was I supposed to know that Jabberjaws lived in your pants At that junction I came to realize That only Frank Purdue likes thighs that size Fatty fatty boom ba latty I gotta lament That you were not a girl... you were an experiment Coz you're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk) Coz you're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (you're pretty when I'm drunk) You're pretty when I'm drunk (and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk) THE EVILS OF PLACENTA HUSTLING Excuse me, have you seen my wife's placenta? ONE WAY Jimmy Pop's not a pooper not a pauper but a popper And I got more pop than Orville Redenbacher And I got more gravy than the whole Gravy Train When I'm kooky going loopy like a man insane I won't be around when the world ends So the only thing that I'll recycle is your girlfriend Aww back to the side I jump up I swing When I'm using Knockem' Sockem' ya know I'm playing it to win The Nina the Pinta the Santa Maria See you later salamander coz I wouldn't want to be ya I'm a chip I'm a Pringle coz you know I gots the flavour Pop me up in your mouth like I was a Life Saver Ain't got no soul but I got more than Don Henley I'm whiter than Casper but I'm not that friendly Marco Polo you tried to fly solo Make your thoughts vocal I'll put ya in a choke hold One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha (getcha) I'll getcha (getcha) I'm a gangster no I'm a gangster bitch Your momma gave me head your girlie gave me the itch So scratch it 'til the bass beats fast listen to the shotgun blast In the oven you'll get burned or in the tank that you'll get gassed Fake-o like Bacos never mistake though Showing up painted up fresh from Macco Now I'm coming in in stereo rounder than a Cheerio Quick to fill your fix and I'm dizzier than a merry-go Rock this obnoxious I'm truly not nice Coz I'm blood sucking evil like Muppets On Ice Arriba arriba I'm the under achiever Gonna Leave It To Beaver I'm the Daydream Believer I'm like Mothra man with my big wingspan And your the mother fucking Jap that killed my offspring Chan I'm a Menace To Society I'm gonna fill the prophecy First I'll drink your Genesee and then I'll take your liberty One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha (getcha) I'll getcha (getcha) Di Di Mao You burn village down You bring family over we all Wang Chung I'm a tarantula in your Chiquita And when you're peeling back the skin I'm gonna see ya I'm gonna bite ya I'm gonna bite ya I'm Jimmy Pop I'll tell you straight up I don't like ya Coz I'm cold kicking lyrics till the day I die Many fail to copy but at least they still try Busting up vocabulary is what I do most I'm gonna spread your legs like butter and gobble ya up like toast You went for the cherry you went bobbing for the apple But the apple it be rotten and you had to eat the scrappple Scrapple? Pig meat from a pig pen hog leftovers your girlfriend So I flex to the effects and I don't care what nobody thinks I'm eating up your sherbert and dropping all your Tiddiley Winks Whoops goes my arm I think it's outta socket Come over little girlie I got some candy in my pocket One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna getcha (getcha) I'll getcha (getcha) GO DOWN Step back coz the bass is fuzzin' Bloodhound Gang bangs more than the dirty dozen Alley oop here comes the slam i know where I stand I'm feelin' like Anthrax coz you know I'm the man Yeah I dug your dame but all I did was kiss her But I got to second base with your mom and your sister I'll wipe the grin off your face like I was a can of Windex I threw a right I threw a right was I live or Memorex Go down down deep deep in and out quick Coz I'm harder than Chinese arithmetic Now my fist is in your face coz you stood in my way You tried to talk your shit and your ass got paid I get stupid like the mongoloid Corky Welcome to McDonald's may I take your order Coz I'm cold kicken' lyrics like my arm was on fire Like Pinnochio my nose don't grow coz I ain't no liar Go down go down to get it up get it up Go down go down to get it up y'all Go down go down to get it up get it up Go down go down to get it up y'all Clap it on clap it off sniff my exhaust Coz i got more steps than Barishnikov Like a pirouette, a pirouette, a pair of wet jeans You don't understand but your girl knows what I mean So I kicks my lines kind of complex A text of intricate words and other spoken effects Like a preacher on the mount teaching things he doesn't follow When you tried to hit the brake but pushed on the throttle Mr. Goody Two Shoes picture the scenario Your girl blew me as I blew your stereo And I gots more bass than a baseball diamond Don't put me on your chalkboard coz I'm not down with Simon Sonic boom in your room assume you're not there Booty licken' nugget picken' with your dad downstairs Love is just a fallacy I got more force than gravity I can run all night like an Energizer battery Go down go down to get it up get it up Go down go down to get it up y'all Go down go down to get it up get it up Go down go down to get it up y'all Go down go down to get it up get it up Go down go down to get it up y'all Go down go down to get it up get it up Go down go down to get it up y'all EARLAMEYER THE BUTT PIRATE Ahoy, sissy! Whatcha got in your mouth sissy? NO REST FOR THE WICKED I get bombed much like Pearl Harbor The price is white right and I'm Bob Barker This is your brain on drugs This is your brain on Jackie Onassis All you crotch goblins can kiss our asses Yessirree Bob like corn on the cob I'm all buttered up ready to hobnob Daddy is a Kraut you're Nazi-occupied France I'm gonna rise to the occasion inside my pants So yo ass yeah you I wanna "Fraggle Rock" your girlie Comin' around the party comin' around like Mr Furley I'm Mr Furley you're Jack Tripper You're dumb ass Gilligan and I'm the Skipper Tiptoe through my tulips and come and frolic Coz my name is Betty Ford and she's an alcoholic So here I am rock me like a hurricane Not a Scorpion but my sting will bring your dame a lot of pain And Daddy's gonna tell ya I'm as cool as Jack the Ripper Somewhat of a cutthroat but still a big tipper As I tickle you pink I bet my fingers start to stink I'm what's missin' from your life and you're the missing link It doesn't matter how you win or lose it's how you lick it No rest for the wicked Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Flips it up in the air like my name was Bob Barker I always kicks it cold so I gotta wear my parka I'm leavin' down my marker I'm stalkin' like a stalker Usin' the force like my name was Luke Skywalker Left hand's on the wheel and the right one on the bottle One foot in the grave and the other on the throttle I'm floatin' through your atmosphere like the comet Haley As freaky as a freak show call me Barnum and Bailey So yo ho my Cheerio here I'm comin' around the bend Don't try to shake my hand I'm not your fuckin' friend Body slam ya to the ground like I was Captain Lou Albano Hit ya in the balls 'til you're singin' soprano Slide to the dance floor groove 'til you get sore Listen to the tiger's roar I'll pump you like a seesaw I'm a tattooed demon do you catch my meanin' Think that you're dreamin' but soon you'll be screamin' I got more senseless violence than a Thrilla In Manila Like my hero Gacy I'm a stone cold killer I got my moves from Thriller I'm Fish you're "Barney Miller" I'm spreadin' out the carnage like Mecha-Godzilla Like Jimmy Pop says he's as cool as Jack the Ripper So take off your panties and kick off your slippers Do as I say and I will be a big tipper More smooth moves than my man Jack Tripper Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off Get down drink it up bring it on take it off SHE AIN'T GOT NO LEGS Baby (yeah) The first time I saw you darling I knew I was in love (Tell her Daddy) The way you took your wheelchair up that handicap ramp (Mmm, it's a mind blower) But now baby I miss ya, I miss ya I miss all the times we played Marco Polo in the pool (Oh yeah) Hide and go seek beneath the sheets (Oh yeah) And just the smell of the oil in your wheelchair I remember the day I saw you hobbling A Weeble Wobbling you had a problem You didn't have any legs just a smile and some stumps No smelly feet a torso to hump No baby love yeah that's what we'd be making Ride you like a Sit and Spin until your stumps started aching Spin you around yeah roll you near yeah Turn you upside down to hold my beer You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same oh baby You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same They say nothing beats a great pair of legs but somehow Baby the day you walked out of my life there's nothing I wanted more than, than for you to come crawling back to me When we started going together people said they couldn't believe it That I could be so happy with a quadriplegic We would wake up real early and you could make me some eggs (mmm) Girl I didn't care if you ain't got no legs I loved you for you and you loved me for me (oh yeah) Wasn't really hard for those more fortunate to see That the first time we made love it was such a wonderful feeling The way the suspension wires held you 'cross the ceiling When you rolled out of my life, my heart just broke I can still hear the noise of the squeaks in your spokes You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same oh baby You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same oh baby You ain't got no legs but I love you just the same You ain't got no legs... WE LIKE MEAT Hey, look at all that meat, ain't she the bitter end? COO COO CA CHOO Coo coo ca choo baby you, that's what you are You are a hollywood star you're the high priestess by far And you know this tune is for you we call it coo coo ca choo And it's a very brief description of the things we could do to you (Your body is incredible) You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, coo coo ca choo You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, now what ya gonna do? You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, coo coo ca choo You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, now what ya gonna do? Oil me up quick miss daisy before I'm lubing up your tailpipe Or the bedposts will be a knocking and a knocking 'til the break of light Raised and dazed in a million and one ways Like a Morton coffee roll I want you hot and glazed So you're the real thing baby you're Parkay you're not butter Gonna have to get you home and lube you up with fluff-n-nutter Scope it scope it baby looking so fit Playing games and laying dames you know I know you know it Now you're quick to get the condom you know the Jimmy's gonna fit you snug Lean you against the fire place and ride you on the bear skin rug Chow down my Ding Dong come and sing along Slip a grip around my tip and then you'll be my Klingon Yeah in my sweat pants you're gonna see my erection Ooh oh pick a de pop pop perfection Umpla dumpla dippedee do Coz I'd never leave the house if mommy looked like you You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, coo coo ca choo You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, now what ya gonna do? You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, coo coo ca choo You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, now what ya gonna do? Butter up butter cup did ya really think it would really last that long? My attention span hutches and when you wake up you know that I'll be gone Cocoa butter beach blonde wearin' that thin thong You know I got a thing for you it's only an inch long Pickin' up your signals like you're a T.V. station I'm lookin' for the channel to have immoral applications Lookin' so fine Cosmo behind Fermentation of time like Riunite wine Well I'm bubblin' up and steamin' like an active volcano I think I clogged up all your pipes better get yourself some Drano I get annoyed coz I can't avoid Baby sounding like a mongoloid I gots the skills to keep ya busy all night If you do not bite I hope you blow like dynamite Happy Thanksgiving would you like a little white meat? I'll stuff my Butterballs then you can eat You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, coo coo ca choo You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, now what ya gonna do? You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, coo coo ca choo You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, now what ya gonna do? You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, coo coo ca choo You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, now what ya gonna do? You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, coo coo ca choo You were looking at me I was looking at you Coo coo ca choo, now what ya gonna do? You were lookin' at me You were lookin' at me RANG DANG So set your phasers on kill if ya will so catch the feelin' Got your head a pumpin' a back and forth until it hits the ceilin' Now I'm wheelin' dealin' stealin' Johnny's apple seeds Slapped you with a baseball bat upside the head until it bleeds Showin' no mercy step like Solomon Grundy Hit ya with a table leg like I was Ted Bundy I bludgeoned you you're bloodied you think it's kind of funny First I'll take your money and then I'll swipe your honey Dip slip to the A.M. what is that you're sayin'? You think you start prayin' it's not a game you're playin' Pump one pump two listen to the shotgun blast I'll blast that sorry ass when you're all outta gas I freak like cerebral pals I'll get inside your drawers For alarm there is no coz I funk like Lou Rawls Basco Roscoe P. Cotrane I wish I had a membrane so that I could go insane Red Light Green Light you know I always win this game You can be my gingerbread and I'll be your candy cane Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby You might say no but I hope you mean maybe Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby You might say no but I hope you mean maybe No chance in hell but I could tell you crave me Frisky from the whiskey and the thrills you gave me Taste great but less filling so thrilling Come unannounced like automatic billing And you can't do nothin' as I push your buttons When I talk you're gonna listen like I'm E.F. Hutton Like Lionel Richie up "All Night Long" Jimmy Pop don't do nobody wrong Stop flop flip and flop Panties drop now I'm on top So "Wiggle It" just a little bit I won't kiss your ass to get a piece of it You said you wanted to do it now you're comin' around to it I'm the one that sowed the seed but you're the one that grew it Take it blow by blow like Reginald Denny I do it all the time how many? Many Frauleins I'm comin' again like Jesus And when I resurrect I'll be damned if I don't please ya Our Jimmy Pop that art in hell hear it Fill me with your Holy Spirit Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby You might say no but I hope you mean maybe Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby You might say no but I hope you mean maybe Eenie meanie miney moe Which of you girls will be my ho? Cross your fingers grit your teeth Coz the Bloodhound Gang makes holes in beef We make holes in beef We make holes in beef We make holes in beef We make holes in beef So watch your back straight to the attack I'll spin you around like your name was Pat Sajak Tag your ass out and no tag backs You psycho nymphomaniac Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby You might say no but I hope you mean maybe Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby You might say no but I hope you mean maybe Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby You might say no but I hope you mean maybe Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby Rang dang diddle la dang a dang baby You might say no but I hope you mean maybe NIGHTMARE AT THE APOLLO (We want Apollo! we want Apollo!) Haha, all right Apollo! Let's hear it one more time for mister, Gary, Coleman! Whatcha talk about Willis? That joke is funny everytime I hear it! Let's put your hands together now, Harlem For, that's right, Harlem That's right, get up now, Harlem For The Blood, hound, Gang! Yo wassup Apollo! Everybody say "Ho!" Get off the stage honkie boys (boys boys boys) K.I.D.S INCORPORATED Roll the fuckin' tape back and let's try it again. This time more sloppy, like childbirth. Where's me fuckin' bass guitar? Everybody look around hear the sound Somethin' special's gonna come your way We got somethin' new that is true We got somethin' just for you today All around the nation Woah We're the new sensation Have you heard? Have you heard? Have you heard? We're K.I.D.S Incorporated K.I.D.S yeah K.I.D.S Incorporated K.I.D.S Woah, look's like we made it We're K.I.D.S Incorporated In the city in the street there's a beat There's a feeling that you can't deny All the people wanna move wanna groove There's a sign of spirit in their eyes All around the nation Woah, we're the new sensation Have you heard? Have you heard? Have you heard? We're K.I.D.S Incorporated K.I.D.S yeah K.I.D.S Incorporated K.I.D.S Woah, look's like we made it We're K.I.D.S Incorporated K.I.D.S K.I.D.S Incorporated We're gonna have fun K.I.D.S K.I.D.S Incorporated For everyone All around the nation We're the new sensation Have you heard? Have you heard? Have you heard? We're K.I.D.S Incorporated K.I.D.S yeah K.I.D.S Incorporated K.I.D.S Woah, look's like we made it We're K.I.D.S Incorporated What? Looks like we made it We're K.I.D.S Incorporated Alright, where's me smack?