TRUFFLES You, you think you're such a bad *ss You think you're such a rough neck Well I saw you outside eating truffles with your mom on the patio I think it's really sad though and tell your girl to quit buggin' me Coz I saw her outside suckin' d*ck In the bathroom of the bus of the Iron Maiden cover band When your pencil neck breaks, when your bird chest caves in... I'm gonna win When your pencil neck breaks, when your bird chest caves in... I'm gonna win Me, I'm just another gringo, a bitter jalepeno But I gets more montequilla in a week than your b*tch *ss gets in a lifetime You're steppin' on a land mine Your gonna shoot your eye out I'm thinkin' what in the Sam Ham Hill is goin' on with your moms in the clogs and the skirt Wouldn't f*ck'er for my country with a flag on her face and a stolen d*ck When your pencil neck breaks, when your bird chest caves in... I'm gonna win When your pencil neck breaks, when your bird chest caves in... I'm gonna win You, you think you're still a bad *ss, You think you're still a rough neck Well let's take this outside SUNSHINE When I look at your face I see dirt All the sunshine you blow up my ass starts to hurt And I don't really mind if I'm nothin' in your eyes It's no surprise to me There's a rocket I built It's under my kilt It's coming to blow you away I was a jerk I did the work for somebody else's dream I took the chance I lost my pants In somebody else's dream tonight Now you're calling me up to get paid And if you don't get paid then you'll never get laid But I really don't have any money I say goodbye, and you'll have to depend on your size There's a thing that I built It's under my kilt It's coming to blow you away I was a jerk I did the work for somebody else's dream I took the chance I lost my pants In somebody else's dream tonight Now I think that I'm going to bed As the image of you and your cr*p leaves my head Cause it's t-minus 20 tomorrow, rocket flies And it doesn't depend on the size There's a rocket I built It's under my kilt It's coming to blow you away I was a jerk I did the work for somebody else's dream I took the chance I lost my pants In somebody else's dream tonight Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh TEENAGE DIRTBAG Her name is Noel I have a dream about her She rings my bell I got gym class in half an hour And oh how she rocks In Keds and tube socks But she doesn't know who I am And she doesn't give a damn about me Coz I'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby Yeah I'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby Listen to Iron Maiden, baby...with me, Ooh Her boyfriend's a d*ck He brings a gun to school He'd simply kick my *ss if he knew the truth He lives on my block And he drives an IROK And he doesn't know who I am And he doesn't give a damn about me Coz I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby Yeah, I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby Listen to Iron Maiden, baby... with me, Ooh Oh yeah... dirtbag No she doesn't know what she's missing Oh yeah... dirtbag No she doesn't know what she's missing Man I feel like mould It's prom night and I am lonely, lo and behold She's walkin' over to me this must be fake My lip starts to shake How does she know who I am? And why does she give a damn about me? I've got two tickets to Iron Maiden, baby Come with me Friday, don't say maybe I'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby like you, Ooh Oh yeah... dirtbag No she doesn't know what she's missing Oh yeah... dirtbag No she doesn't know what she's missing, oh A LITTLE RESPECT I tried to discover a little something to make me sweeter Oh baby refrain from breaking my heart I'm so in love with you I'll be forever blue That you give me no reason, you know you're making me work so hard That you give me no, that you give me no That you give me no, that you give me no... Soul I hear you calling Oh baby please (give a little respect) give a little respect to me And if I should falter, would you open your arms out to me? We can make love not war, and live in peace with our hearts I'm so in love with you I'll be forever blue What religion or reason could drive a man to forsake his lover? Don't you tell me no, don't you tell me no Don't you tell me no, don't you tell me no... Soul I hear you calling Oh baby please (give a little respect) give a little respect to me I'm so in love with you I'll be forever blue That you give me no reason You know you're making me work so hard That you give me no, that you give me no That you give me no, that you give me no... Soul I hear you calling Oh baby, please (give a little respect) give a little respect to me I hear you calling Oh baby, please (give a little respect) give a little respect to me HUMP EM 'N' DUMP EM Cough up the rent Mr. Kent And don't try to blame it on the government Your wife is a clown she's in town, she gets with some other guy Are you gonna finish your fat? Cause I'd like to give it to my kitty cat The big fat look is coming back You skinny people are screwed And I know you're right Yeah I know it's time Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again, here we go again Now I know what you're like and I don't think I like it The newspaper says to get bent, Man I'd like to say that to the President He got the L. in the House, I guess he already did She looks like she finished her fat She then turned around and ate my kitty cat She coughed up a hair ball or two and laughed her way to the bank And I know it's right Yeah I know it's time Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again, here we go again Now I know what you're like and I don't think I like it Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again, here we go again Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again another, another, another... Here we go again, here we go again Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again another, another, another... Here we go again, here we go again Here we go again another hump em dump em situation Here we go again another, another, another... Here we go again, here we go again Now I know what you're like and I don't think I like it LEROY He's got the dirtiest shoes that I ever seen Chew on a blunt wipe his butt with a magazine Smokin' his crack wash it down with gasoline Still he push the button, E.F. Hutton when he speaks to me Oh you know he told me "Shake it, don't break it It took too damn long to make it" Leroy is my mojo man Leroy is my mojo man He come he take me by the hand Cause Leroy is my mojo man tonight... alright! He's just a p*mp with a limp and some vaseline He told me to "Look, over there!" and stole my nectarine Said, "Don't turn your back on me black, I'm a s*x machine" Still he push the button E.F. Hutton when he speaks to me Oh you know he told me, "Shake it, don't break it It took too d*mn long to make" Leroy is my mojo man Leroy is my mojo man He come he take me by the hand Cause Leroy is my mojo man tonight... alright! Oh you know he told me, "Shake it, don't break it, it took too damn long to make it" "Shake it, don't break it, it took too d*mn long to make it" "Shake it, don't break it, it took too d*mn long to make it" "Shake it, don't break it, it took too d*mn long to make it" Leroy is my mojo man Leroy is my mojo man He come he take me by the hand Coz Leroy is my mojo man tonight Leroy is my mojo man Leroy is my mojo man He come he take me by the hand Coz Leroy is my mojo man tonight MR BROWN Man I think it's just a little sleazy You said you was like butter but you're cheesy To treat me like I'm spinner bait you can't wait Go fish off some other dock Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me You're gonna have to prove it to me If I don't call you back your head spins If I told you what I think you'd shit your linens "It's just another interview, nothing new" But they don't even know my name Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! You're gonna have to prove it to me Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! Hey, Mr Brown, don't have a cow Just compensate me! You're gonna have to prove it to me LOVE IS A MUTT FROM HELL This is a story about a friend of mine He is abnormally intelligent He could bust a phatty rhyme, even when he got up in the blunt But that all changed when the girl who he lives with came to town He let here take him away from me so I had to ask him how That's when he said, "She takes advantage of me! She takes advantage of me! She takes advantage of me! She takes advantage of me! She even knows when I pee! I think eventually she'll make a meal out of me." Because her love is a mutt from hell that I can't live without Your love is a mutt from hell that I can't live without One of these days I swear I'm gonna get out 'Til then your love is a mutt from hell that I can't live without, woah That's why I'm talking to you now Sarah lives with Bradley now, I guess that is how she wants her sh*t He needed a place to stay, so it's of mutual benefit I stopped by on my way to Pomona yesterday She sat down and spilled her guts to me That's when I thought she would tell me she's gay Instead she said, "He takes advantage of me! He takes advantage of me! He takes advantage of me! He takes advantage of me! He even knows when I pee! I think eventually he'll make a meal out of me." Because her love is a mutt from hell that I can't live without Your love is a mutt from hell that I can't live without One of these days I swear I'm gonna get out 'Til then your love is a mutt from hell that I can't live without Talking to, That's why I'm talking to, That's why I'm talking to... Talking to, That's why I'm talking to, That's why I'm talking, talking, talking to you Because, your love is a mutt from hell that I can't live without That's why I'm talking to you now That's why I'm talking to you now That's why I'm talking to you now That's why I'm talking to you now PUNK *SS B*TCH She wriggles and she wraggles, she jiggles and she jaggles You stand and watch her pass by, your line of vision *ss-high You think that cause she smiles, that you turn all her dials But you don't see them later, while in the elevator You nag her and you swagger, you think you're gonna sh*g her A man about the town-a, get funky, let's get down-a Machismo and machasma, it turns into miamsa But you have got no class, no style, no social skills, no comprehension I can't deal with this idiot Yeah I must admit that he's a punk *ss b*tch You open up your mouth-a, amazed at what comes out-a Its just a testimony That you're full of bologna, that you're a stupid sh*t-ass, a meathead, guido, pass-gas That you have got no class, no style, no social skills, no comprehension I can't deal with this idiot Yeah I must admit that he's a punk *ss b*tch I can't deal with this idiot Yeah I must admit that he's a punk *ss b*tch Woah, woah, woah You know you want to spangle, but you can't seem to angle One gives you attitude-a, your reason to be rude-a You think that cause she smiles, that you turn all her dials But you don't see them later, while in the elevator You nag her and you swagger, you think you're gonna sh*g her A man about the town-a, get funky, let's get down-a Machismo and machasma, it turns into miamsa You have got no class, no style, no social skills, no comprehension You open up your mouth-a, amazed at what comes out-a It's just a testimony, that you're full of bologna, that you're a stupid sh*t-ass A meathead, guido, pass gas But you have got no class, no style, no social skills, no comprehension I can't deal with this idiot, yeah I must admit that he's a punk *ss b*tch I can't deal with this idiot, yeah I must admit that he's a punk *ss b*tch Woah, woah, woah WANNABE GANGSTER I am a wannabe You better be careful around me I come from far away, where mustang dreams are made And we are fashioned in the image of the Don's who have come before us We all kiss the rings of sand like our fathers told us Coz I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack Better go back to far away Like a lemon pie a la mode, my nine is easy to load All hail Jericho Turnpike Teck That's where I go to learn the things about the universe I'll need So I can build a stamped Coz I'm all up in your face again, I'm all up in your face Coz I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack Better go back to far away A wannabe gangstar, a victim of the chromosome prankster I thanks ya, I sits back in my chair to contemplate my hair OOH D*MN, I reak of cologne But yo I'm lookin' snappy, I'm nappy, I'm cr*ppy, got jimmy hats from pappy So now I'm trigger happy (Girl did he just rhyme 'cr*ppy' with 'happy'?) Yeah, so you girlies wanna get wit this nit wit, got Cheese Whiz or not? Then I'm a hafta blow up ya mail box B*IATCH! Or toilet paper ya front yard, show the cops my Suburbs Card They gotta let me go cause they know that I'm hard It's the deal it's for real, ya betta listen to what I'm tellin' ya... Coz I'm a wannabe gangstar Coz I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack I'm a wannabe gangstar, better go back to Commack Better go back to far away