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chronological order is from the bottom to the top of the page
links are in the times new roman font
america
is
a
mass
culture
and
not
the
brightest
i
have
to
say !
men
seem
to
need
women
just
as
much
a
s
women
need
men
though
perhaps
in
a
more
indirect
way !
modern
society
is
like
a
fish
out
of
water
for
young
men
who
are
designed
to
rape
pillage
and
plunder !
how
strange
and
different
i
am
the
flows
like
the
makukituki
green
swathes
amidst
impenetrable
forest!
religion
ruins
good
poets
including
james
k
baxter
but
not
auden
but i think
that
was
because
he
was
gay
and
it
was
a natural
fit
with
catholicism
he
never seemed
to
let
the
catholicism
affect his
writing
unlike
hopkins
who
spent his
investiture
slowly
dying
a
talk
is
an
empty
thing!
i
feel
it's
actually
contemptuous
of
people
to
give
them
a
talk
like
i
know
better ?
in
his
electronic
igloo
the
famished
barks !
it's
really
hard
to
get
that
when
you
start
to
hit
the
nail
on
the
head
there's
no -
one
around !
byron
katie
usual
female
semantic
pragmatic
problems !
love bombing
is
the
induction
of
a
fake
and
non
reciprocal
intimacy !
once
you
get
wise
to
bombing
circuit
so
thick
with
it
you
can't
stand !
i
don't
actually
find
people
that
interesting
i
hate
to
say
or
i
like
to
say
endless
boring
clones !
medical
worship
the
islam
of
america
and
the
u.k.
you
can
very
nearly
travel
as
good
by
you
tube
as
go
there
we
may
need
to
grow
up
in
an
area
to
make
it
accessible
to
us
in
a
way
that
it's
not
for
adults !
this
is
the
net
people
come
and
go
endlessly !
if
you
don't
think
it's
happening
that
way
for
you
i
don't
think
you
are
seeing
it
correctly !
kylie
minogue
no
amount
of
money
is
worth
breast
cancer !
it
was
avoidable !
the
scientific
process
is
real
and
not
particularly
abstract
and
a
winnowing
of
those
ideas
that
work
from
those
that
don't !
at
the
moment
the
mmr
vaccine
is
inducting
an
evolutionary
winnowing
of
those
unable
to
tolerate
the
measles
and
mumps
vaccines
in
close
proximity
is
this
a
good
idea ?
skepticism
is
pseudo - scientific
they
have
no
real
cognizance
of
the
scientific
process !
it
is
a
political
mindset
allied
to
correctness ”
i
am
really
confident
of
the
quality
of
what
i
write
now !
to
generate
the
material
for
writing
like
this
one
has
to
be
continually
overreaching
oneself !
this
is
the
net
people
float
in
and
out
like
clouds
what
stays
and
what
goes
away ?
marketing
the
BCD ™
and
compendium ™
on
the
web
is
very
difficult
mainly
because
people
react
strongly
against
what
they
don't
want
to
hear
which
is
they
have
got
it
wrong
and
i
have
it
right !
i
overreach
myself
you
underreach
yourself
neither
of
us
are
particulalrly
happy
or
functional !
however
my
grasp
of
truth
is
much
better
than
yours !
the
vast
majority
of
lawyers
are
not
interested
in
their
clients
welfare !
the
time
cube
is
delusional
and
schizophrenic
though
not
without
the
leavening
of
some
sense
just
because
you
are
young
and
dumb
and
we
have
all
been
that
once !
blithely
self
confident
: o )
migraine
brutal
bone
numbing
pain
migraine
brutal
bone
crushing
pain
everything
that
persists
is
empty
everything
that
doesn't
persist
is
empty
too
hell
machines
the
old
soviet
union
has
to
take
the
cake
for
public art !
i
suppose
china
is
a
close
second !
i
don't
know
where
north
korea
fits
: o )
some
things
just
can't
be !
when
a
gift
horse
is
rebuffed
he
gets
to
keep
his
teeth !
everything
is
always
moving
there
is
no
end !
life
is
hard
without
affection
but
clearer
clearer
he
is
such
and
such
an
age
she
is
such
and
such
an
age
how
we
chronograph
ourselves !
a couple was being served ahead of me
she
had
a
a baby
on her arm and a young girl of about 4 was moving around slanting both toes together and then the heels as children sometimes do
she
was
thirty
a
bit older ?
he
was
about 50, well built, tattoos all over his arm, long white hair neatly combed and parted through the center
a long white beard
rough looking but not unfriendly
i
saw
his
eyes
flash with alarm as the groceries went through and the bill mounted up
i
was
touched !
i
think
i
have
had
some
fundamental
shift
more
profoundly
disillusioned
not
just
with
the
world
but
with
myself
the
problems
of
work
are
universal !
i
think
bush
was
a
very
anti-
intellectual
president
but
if
you
glamorise
stupidity
you
are
going
to
get
debacles
like
the
iraqi
war !
in
my
judgement
you
are
making
claims
not
validated
by
reality !
that
sort
of
self -
honesty
is
fundamental !
farewell !
it's
such
a
human
tendency
to
leech !
what
is
the
practical
reality
of
scepticism
they
are
not
very
skeptical
at
all
especially
of
their
own
thinking !
well it's like atheism, the definition is the denial of god but the practical reality is the worship of the human race !
any “ism” makes me run!
there
are
those
that talk about the application of critical thinking and those who actually think critically
it
doesn't
hurt
to
be
underweight
as
you
get
older !
as
usual
i
am
getting
absolutely
nothing
done !
a mother
such
an
investment
of
life
in
some-one
else !
if
it
wasn't
for
the
parallelizers
i
would
never
get
to
the
end !
they garner useful insights which are not quite true which i find useful
i simply make these insights true
i
think
if
i
tell
people
i
know
what
they
want
to
hear
there
is
a
problem !
mercy
may
be
in
a
form
we
do
not
recognise !
i
detect
a
new
form
of
death
in
death
death
stepping
through
the
infinite
universe
summer
flies
and
death
it's
a
totally
peculiar
world !
death
in
the
form
of
life
comes
closer !
well
i
am
not
offended
i
am
just
three
quarters
dead !
in
the
end
what
is
there
to
say !
religious
teachers
they
are
at
some
sort
of
beginning
and
took
the
wrong
road !
i'm
all
for
fatigue
now
why
do
anything
why
give a
talk?
why
listen
to
a
talk ?
advertising
needs
to
be
educational
it's
amazing
how
little
effective
advertising
there
is
if
any !
giving
health
advice
on
the
internet
a
more
hopless
fruitless
business
is
hard
to
find !
it
just
takes
lots
of
alone
i
have
spent
years
helping
people
and
i
can
tell
you
it's
a
pretty
fruitless
and
hopeless
job
not
always
but
99.999%
they
only
want
to
be
helped
on
their
own
terms
which
can
be
pretty
narrow !
men
and
women
have
a
horrendous
capacity
for
being
involved
with
each
other !
charles
bukowski's
problem
with
alcohol
was
that
it
made
him
essentially
gift
his
life
to
readers
like
me
and
left
whole
segments
of
his
own
life
missing
out !
another
weapon
in
the
female
armoury !
the
problem
with
alcohol
is
life
slides
away
you
i
don't
know
what
to
do
or
where
i
am
going
unions
they
don't
appear
to
be
interested
in
much
except
collecting
fees
and
playing
at
being
bosses !
each fly
you
kill
is
there
ain't
anything
benign
about
the
universe !
well
the
statue
of
limitations
of
i
think
the
surprising
thing
about
how
bad
a
movie
it
is
miscast
both rourke
and
dunaway
are
not
real
rourke
doesn't
even
slightly
fit
and
the
screenplay
is
a bowdlerization
of
charles
bukowski's
life
even
tho
he
wrote
it
himself
well
it's
fake
but
it
made
him
some
money
i
guess !
well
almost
fake !
this
is
the
story !
not
palatable
i
am
afraid !
you
can
say
it's
not
easy
being
female
but
they
don't
want
it
easy !
if
the
survival
of
the
species
was
left
up
to
males
it
wouldn't
happen !
islam
has
a
degree
of
social
control
that
is
medieval !
you
can
make
a
s
much
progress
by
giving
something
up
a
s
continuing
with
it!
communism
with
the
chinese
was
always
an
illusion !
the
internet
has
changed
everything
the
prism
of
time
focuses
sunny
days
in
the
past
nostalgia
is
such
a
funny
thing !
what
has
gone
before
tends
to
encourage
similarity
in
what
comes
after !
why
do
cats
have
9
lives
natural
stem
cell
therapy !
women
during
their
ovulating
years
have
about
three
or
four
men
have
about
1.2
why
do
we
feel
better
after
a
shit ?
less
biofilm
toxins !
america
living
evidence
of
the
hypothesis
old
men
are
as
attractive
to
young
women
as
scabies !
money
however
is
another
matter !
if
you
get
too
consistently
close
to
dangerous
things
you
are
going
to
be
killed
eventually !
if
you
see
too
much
you
are
not
going
to
do
much !
if
you
make
a
bad
mistake
it's
not
necessarily
something
that's
wasted
if
you
use
the
memory
of
that
not
to
make
the
same
mistake
ever
again
since
it
is
obviously
something
you
are
susceptible
to !
writers
block
is
just
the
brain
not
working
properly
lack
of
nutrition
usually
i
don't
count
the
profusion
of
bilge !
don't
be
so
keen
to
praise
what
injures
you !
goldman
sachs
if
you
are
valuing
facebook
you
need
to
ask
yourself
what
wikipedia
is
worth !
alain
de
botton
a
wrong
minded
upper
class
twit !
the comments are interesting
the
most
interesting
one
being
2nd January 2010
Some to become engrossing 'projects', others regular practices and others to be of only transient interest that 'fall by the wayside'.
I only wish I'd kept a diary for longer than the last 8 years ”
things
are
really
never
going
to
be
different
they
can
be
a
bit
different
and
that's
enough
i
think
; o )
cults
evangelical
christianity
tupperware
door
to
door
sales
it's
all
the
same
influencing
by
personal
impress !
it's
not
the
british
that
are
a
nation
of
shopkeepers
but
the
u.s.a. !
any
number
of
bad
poets
around
some
surprisingly
successful !
overcapacity
in
an
area
is
a problem
in
a
away
you
can
double
up
in
function
unnecessarily
and
this
causes
a
lot
of
grief !
and
not
just
for
you
as
the
retards
seem
determined
to
shaft
you!
i
am
not
sure
what
i
think
or
even
that
i
think
at
all !
the
thinking
part
may
be
a
lot
more
certain
than
the
on
being
ill
in
bed
off
my
head
sick
there's
no
comfort
in
holding
some-one
else !
the
child
is
the
father
of
the
man
the
man
is
the
father
of
the
child !
if
one
eats
blueberries
forever
one
they
be
born
fully
formed? ”
there's
an
infinite
number
of
directions
they
can
take
existentialism
is
satre
applied
to
philosophy
the
result
is
there's
only
one
god
and
that's
me
great
and
small
sharks
propelled
mouths !
who
or
what
is
god ?
your
brain
is
the
closest
you
will
come
god
is
ok
in
small
doses !
the
problem
with
the
sharemarket
is
the
best
companies
stay
private
and
the
dogs
with
unending
captital
replenishment
needs
go
public !
there's
no
disconnect
i'm
not
disconnected !
god
make
me
weep
give
me
the
gorillas
and
other
apes
any
day
at
least
they
are
not
pretentious ! ”
you
don't
have
a
clue
what
god
is
it
is
certainly
not
the
highly
boundarized
mindset
of
the
religious !
infinity
must
have
a
sense
of
humour
the
day
after
seeing
a
shooting
star
drop
directly
ahead
of
me
i
had
a major
life
insight
penny
dropped !
small
minds
don't
reply !
the
net
is
full
of
can
see
it
in
their
a
big
the
net
it's
too
a
counter
intuitive
medium
with
as
many
pitfalls
or
more
than
driving !
there
is
a
certain
willingness
in
being
hard ”
william
james
physics
is
hard
too !
is
a
good
restaurant
a
test
of
your
capacity
to
spend
rather
than
good food?
one
of
the
issues
with
avaita
or
avaita-like
or
new
advaita
is
it
is
simple
mooji
highly
charismatic
with
the
usual
screw
loose
i
think
he's
a bit
thick
actually
a
good
con
artist
doesn't
actually
believe
the
crap !
mooji
half
baked
sincere
he
tries
but
those
eyes
are
predatory
and
he
is
still
half
baked !
i
think
to
be
in
touch
with
infinity
you
have
to
be
a
little
weird !
only
an
idiot
would
think
i
mean
what
i
say
except
when
i
mean
what
i
say
what
happens
if
you
go
through
the
boundaries ?
peace ?
i
don't
think
j
krishnamurti
was
right
either
it
was
only
towards
the
end
of
his
life
he
understood
specific
conciousness !
i
think
i
have
started
a
general
conciousness
versus
specific
concious
ness
school
: o )
everything
falls
into
place
with
specific
conciousness
tho
the
notion
of
general
conciousness
is
not
entirely
void !
oddly
enough
i
saw
a
vertically
falling
star
last
night !
straight
down
it
fell
through
the
trees
ahead !
da
free
john
and
advaita
are
wrong
there
is
no
general
unity
of
conciousness
with
infinity
i
don't
say
there
is
no
specific
unity !
astrology
and
i-ching
are
really
the
same
thing !
writing
is
a
remanent
form
of
language
russian
politics
appears
to
be
about
looting
and
the
incarceration
of
opponents !
stalin
a
man
capable
of
sustaining
vast
inconsistencies !
a
bore ! ”
nietzsche
god
he
was
right
there !
there
is
some
natural
antagonism
between
men
and
women !
atheism
a
disbelief
in
god
well
i
really
don't
know
any
clear
definition
of
god
that
you
can
disbelieve
in!
astrology
and
i-ching
making
drawings
on
the
sand
when
the
tide
comes
in !
smooth
is
not
necessarily
good
and
rough
is
not
necessarily
bad !
did
you
know
bees
are
less
grumpy
in
the
morning ?
if
i
say
men
are
blind
about
women
what
you
object
to
in
my
saying
that
is
not
the
truth
that
men
are
blind
about
women
but
that
they
may
be
less
blind
by
my
alerting
them
to
it
i
assure
you
you
have
nothing
to
worry
about !
it
is
so
deeply
hardwired
into
the
male
brain
that
a
chemical
crow
bar
could
not
shift
that
illusion !
i
write
something
down
it
stays
there
i
can
look
at
it
again
it's
that
simple !
if
you
can
find
the
file
again
on
the
comp
: o )
the
most
positive
thing
about
the
internet
is
the
way
it
is
destroying
the
university
arts
system
the
way
it
has
become
embedded
with
ignorant
mediocrities
she's
got
herself
in
a
situation
that's
got
loser
written
all
over
it
you don't have
to
be
a
you
have
to
start
doing
things
differently
the
health
net
board
scene
are
basically
some
or
quite
a
few
young
women
and
teenagers
now
have a
different
form
of
anorexia
no
needed attention
to their
health
simple
things
like
solar
noon
sun
on
the
skin
and
eating
a
less
biofilm
promoting
diet
with
more
nutrients
beyond
these
losers
i
am
afraid !
you
can
put
any
amount
of
crap
on
life
if
you
have
health
most
do
but
life
is
very
intolerant
of
failing
health
and
if
this
is
the
case
with
you
you
need
to
pay
a
lot
of
attention
to
it !
the
problem
with
talking
is
that
it
puts
you
in
touch
with
this
generation
whereas
writing
puts
you
in
touch
with
past
and
future
generations
which
is
what
is
needed !
migraine
thank
god
for
divided
dose
magnesium
taurate !
infinity
approves
and
you
know
it !
it
doesn't
approve
my
talking
to
you
btw !
approves
writing
though
nothing
like
cancer
s
the
35%
peroxide
actually
it's
no
worse
than
a bit
different
i
forgot
the
i
am
not
normal
i
am
right
on
the
edge
of
functioning
i
may
look
normal
but
i'm
not !
whatever
this
is
it's
very
distinct
you
almost
have
to
go
back
to
old
testament
wisdom
literature
jesus
son
of
sirach
that
sort
of
thing
even
nietzsche
is
a
bit
different !
what
you
really
are
is
the
white
stuff
between
the
ears !
i
don't
believe
in
belief
systems !
in
the
end
what
differentiates
religion
from
art
or
aesthetics
or
philosophy
or
simply
rational
and
clear
thinking
is
underlying
religion
is
a
belief
system
that
is
invariably
contrary
to
life's
observations
the
main
or
inevitable
one
is
the
supremacy
of
this
form
of
hominid
man !
even religions
like
adviata
zen
and
buddhism
which claim to be philosophical
have
underlying
beliefs
enlightenment in zen
being
one
and
advaita
being
another
both
crap
btw !
Simon Rodia
all
that
mattered
was
the
doing !
religion
non
gainful
employment
for
bums !
being
ill
takes
you
out
of
life
newton
became
heavy
metal
poisoned
from
the
watts
towers
you
build
because
you
are
caught
in
something
you
don't
undertsand
what !
sometimes
you
have
to do
something
because
you
believe
in
it !
justo
gallego
mad ?
NO !
it's
humans
building
their
lives
that
are
mad !
i
don't
think
real
life
is
so
solid
there
can
be
no
notion
of
an
after
life !
re
religious
teachers
if
you
need
approval
you
don't
see
it
god
don't
approve
me
buddha
don't
approve
me
and
neither
do
the
feral
cats
around
the yards
and
my
garden
what
kills
religion
where
it
cannot
enforce
it's
belief
ultimately
with
the
death
penalty
is
the
huge
and
horrendous
personal
cost
of
false
beliefs!
it
can
be
very
hard
to
see
past
frauds
very !
history
is
the
history
of
radical
change
and
destruction
brought
about
by
technology
and
tools
caution: disturbing and violent !
since everybody is god
what
do
you
expect ?
there
have
been
entire
homonid
existances
that
have
come
and
gone !
great
philosophy
is
inherently
pessimistic !
if
there's
a
lot
of
non
existance
in
you
you
need
to
give
it
it's
pound
of
blood
in a
way
that
lets
you
survive
without
being
too
crucifyingly
penal
that's
what
aging
is
we
break
up
non
existance
expresses
itself
in
a
way
that
can't
be
denied !
the hackneyed and mundane is your lot !
the
american
arts
education
teaches
people
to
like
and
write
bad
poetry
which
they
do for
the
rest
of
their
lives !
if
you
don't
seek
some - one
out
but
let
them
seek
you
out
how
is
it ?
life
is
a
repeating
pattern
going
forward
then
everything
steps
back
into
hopelessness
and
pointlessness !
just
everything
goes
absolutely
nowhere !
nothing
takes
care
of
itself
everything
has
to
be
thought
through !
better
to
be
an
unknown
than
famous !
if
you
can
do
something
and
know
it's
futile
you
are
seeing
it
realistically !
you
post
to
a
message
board
and
it's clear, cogent, real
that's enough to ensure it doesn't get approved
they cope with anti better than that
it's not the disagreement they can't cope with
it's
the
clarity of
thinking
the
fundamental
problem
of
philosophy
is
how
to
handle
recursion
that
what
you
say
isn't
swallowed
by
the ouroboros
of
meaninglessness
which
actually
in
the
end
is
not
that
possible !
wallace's weakness is he comes from that
same with anything to do with english literature now
fortunately the internet is destroying the university arts system
the
average
human
really
does
not
cope
with
what
makes
them
think
even
slightly
giacomo
leopardi
just
because
i
am
a
count
doesn't
mean
i
won't
starve !
giacomo
leopardi
to
sit
so
still
by
the
side
of
a
lake
everything
boards
you
are
too
informed
get
women
don't
pretend
they
actually
feel
what
they
say
and
are
hard
to
shake
out
of
what
they
feel
if
actually
impossible !
it's
hard
for
a
man
to
get
used
to
the
wonders
of
language !
oprah
is
wealthy
from
providing
entertainment
and
pap
to
people
i
am
poor
from
telling
them
what
they
don't
want
to
hear
is
there
any
other
way ?
it's an ongoing discussion
there's
no resolution tomorrow either, it's of advantage to take things a bit further before tomorrow because tomorrow takes it further again
there's
just
no
paradigms
that
fit
in
terms
of
what
one
might
normally
expect
same
way
either
escher and dali
what
where
they
saying
again
and
again ?
recursion !
in
dali's
case
he
was
a
s
much
said
as
saying !
with
recursion
life
loses
it's
meaning
that's
why
people
are
avoidant
of
it !
it
always
is
a
conversation
of
equals
everyone
really
has
to
understand
that !
tenniel
made
charles
dodgson
take
the
best
out
of
alice
through
the
looking
glass
which
is
just
so
typical
why
is
it
the
best
chapter
in
the
book
that's
for
you
to
work
out !
a
vast
cultural
insanity !
tractatus logico-philosophicus
deals
with
recursion
in
an
way !
why
have
a
dreadful
death
when
you
can
have a
dreadful
life !
i
don't
think
that
has
affected
me
maybe it
has
affected
me
who
am
i
if
i
think
that
i
sorta
think
one
thing
then
another
then
take
the
average
that's
how
i
work !
fancy versus fantasy
fancy is
more
light
hearted
fantasy
is
in
my
view
a
pathology
of
mind
wallace however is 2nd rate and you can see it in the way he discards the mature wittgenstein
solipsism rules !
don't know why it reduces grown men to tears
women
are
like
strike
then
follow
every
move
until
you
there's
no -
one
in
this
generation
except
me
hard
to
bite
for
a
social
animal !
it's sorta like a stasis
it's not possible to live continually in that intensity which is what i think you expect
you
just
have
to
keep
going
if
you
are
stuck
in
the
middle
of
a
desert
you
are
not
going
to
get
out
unless
you
keep
moving
in
a
coherent
way
strong
people
can
come
to
grief
at
the
point
that
they
are
strong
about
something
wrong
effectively
running
against
the
splinters
of
the
world's
grain
weak
people
can
be
stronger
than
strong
people
because
they
logic
it
out
and
let
themselves
move
with
the
way
world
works
i don't actually want that
it is attractive but deep down i don't believe in it
a crucifying illusion
the nature of the love changes and is never designed to sit excessively relying on the partner
something
dies
without
children !
a
christmas
thought !
what
i
say
is
like
an
hypothesis
it's
certainly
not
you
love
your
children
but
there
is
some
barrier
between
them
and
you !
a
very
human
problem
is
asserting
yourself
in
areas
you
don't
know
anything
about
do
and
do
not
then, wretched human race, what thought
of you finally pierces my heart?
I don’t know if laughter or pity prevails.
don't
have
the
energy
for
laughter
or
the
sympathy
for
pity !
the
sordid
goings
on
of
the
gurus
and
teachers
illusions
writes :
is
what
we
end
up
with
love?
or
some
close
approximation...
my reply
is love itself is an approximation?
no
grief
in
short
falls
of
love
if
love
itself
is
a
shortfall?
i
think
your
issue
is
you
are
looking
for
completeness
in
a shortfall
but
time
just
continually
shows
it
to
be
a
shortfall !
the
whole
problem
in
life
of
the
endless
approach
and
removal
from
infinity !
your
sons
grow
up
to
be
men !
you
can
be
unclear
about
something
for
years
and
then
once
it
starts
to
become
clear
can
go
through
at
a
pace
that
is
terrifying !
and
it's
all
over
in
a
very
short
space
of
time !
is
no
end
result
it
just goes
on
and
on
until
one
can
no
longer
track
it !
da
free
john
made
a
mistake
the
7th
stage
is
an
error
he
took
the
wrong
and
had
15
to
20
years
to
go
and
in
fact
what
might
be
the
10th
or
11th
stage
needs
to
occur
first
or
it
can
never
happen
again
and
obviously
he
stopped
short
as
a child
no
true
sense
of
ultimate
reality
or
he
would
have
never
waste
a
minute
with
actually
the
stages
are
crap !
i'm
a
very
late
developer
how
late
is
just
becoming
a
apparent
to
me
30
years ?
autistic
isle
or
tasmania
as
it
is
called !
yes
rippers
seamy
underside
of
female
suburban
life !
a
little
rule
of
life
don't
be
offended
on
the
behalf
of
others
if
they
are
not
even
if
the
only
reason
they
are
not
offended
is
because
they
are
