Monday
13 March 2000 |
Reading: The Temple and the Stone - Katherine Kurtz and
Deborah Turner Harris
Listening: instructions on office mail procedures Thinking: I like this place Drinking: Hot chocolate Ok-o-meter: 7, pretty ok Quote for the day: I sit beside my lonely fire and pray for wisdom yet: for calmness to remember or courage to forget - Charles Hamilton Aide Weather report: warm and sunny All I ever wanted was to stay in my lovely home and have bunches of kids. I know I talk about my home a lot. And I know that I don't have it, will probably never have it, and I need to let it go. If it happens it happens, right? My parents didn't buy their house until my sisters were 17. I don't want to wait until Lorelei is 17 for us to buy our house. I just can't wait that long. The problem is that I have bills, who doesn't? I have to work to pay those bills. The more I work the less I want to work and the more I know I have to because I like the things that money get me and the money comes from work. I know I sound like I'm whining, but this is the way I feel. Some people are destined for greatness, some have greatness thrust upon them and some live and die in an average existence. I just want the average exisitence. I would have done well if I had followed my original game plan: marry a rich man and not have to work for the rest of my life. Ok, sounds shallow, but hey, it would have worked for me. I talk about my non-existent house
("When I have my house, I'm gonna...") so much and my family was getting
so frustrated (becuase they thought I was asking or blaming them) I have
instructed them to just say "Yes, dear" when I talk about it.
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