Momisms

Here's all those words of wisdom and other things Mom told you.
How many of them has she said to YOU?!

Stop playing with that - you'll poke your eye out.

If your friends jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?

Shut the door - I can't pay to heat the whole neighborhood.

There are starving people in India
who would be happy to clean your plate for you.

I'm not everyone else's mother - I'm your mother.

Don't pick at it, it'll get infected.

I would have never talked to my mother like that!

Don't use that tone with me!

You better wipe that smile off you face before I do it for you.

Were you born in a barn? Close that door!

"I don't know" is not an answer.

I don't care what everyone else is doing,
I care what YOU are doing.

As long as you live under my roof, you'll listen to my rules.

Bored? How can you be bored?
I was never bored at your age.

Don't you have anything better to do with yourself?

Don't make me come in there!

Don't roll your eyes at me.

I'm not going to ask you again

What do I look like, your maid?!

I wouldn't make you do it if I didn't love you.

Who do you think you are - the Queen of Sheba?

I always love you, but I don't always like you.

Are you going out dressed like THAT?

Don't sit so close to the TV - you'll ruin your eyes.

If you keep acting like a baby, I'll start treating you like one.

You'll understand when you're older.

Turn off the light!
Do you think we own the electric company?

Some day you'll thank me for this.

You can't always have what you want.

Life's not fair.

I'm not running a taxi service here!

What have I done to deserve such ungrateful children?

When I was a little girl ...

Act your age!

Don't make me stop this car!

Don't put that in your mouth - you don't know where it's been.

Are your hands broken? Pick it up!

We had a lot more respect for adults when I was a child.

I'll treat you like an adult when you start acting like one.

If you keep sticking your tongue out, it'll fall off.

Who died and left you boss?

You are getting on my last nerve!

Go play outside, it's a beautiful day!

I didn't ask who put it there, I said pick it up!

Don't cross your eyes, they'll get stuck that way.

You must get that from your father's side of the family.

Go ask your father!

Wait until your father gets home!

Go to your room and think about what you did.

Always wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident.

Running away? Let me help you pack your bags.

Running away? Send me a postcard when you get there!

Don't eat that, you'll get worms.

Don't go out with your head wet - you'll catch a cold.

Stop crying before I give you something to cry about.

Don't make me tell you again.

You'll miss me when I'm gone!

Did you use soap in that shower?

You don't have to like me - I'm your mother.

When I was your age ...

You WILL eat it, and you WILL like it.

No child of mine would do something like that.

Eat your vegetables!

I'm going to give you until the count of three ...

This hurts me more than it hurts you.

I hope someday you have children just like you.

If you'd open your eyes as big as you
open your mouth maybe you'd find it!

How many times do I have to tell you?

Don't ever let me catch you doing that again!

Money does not grow on trees.

Let's see - the last time I wore your shoes, I left them ...

Your shoes have to be somewhere -
they didn't walk out of the house by themselves!

You didn't learn that in THIS house!

LOOK at me when I'm talking to you.

So it's raining. You're not made of sugar,
you won't melt.

Why? Because I said so!

Am I talking to a brick wall?

What do you mean carry you?
I carried you for nine months!

I was not put on this earth to entertain you.

You just have big bones.

A little soap never hurt anyone.

It's no use crying over spilt milk.

I don't care who started it, I said stop!

When you have kids of your own, you'll understand.

I'm not talking just hear hear my own voice!

Someone's going to end up getting hurt!

I don't have to explain myself.

You'll never live to see 16!

If you don't quit that,
I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week.

I don't know how you turned out the way you did!

Where do you think YOU'RE going?!

Eat your carrots - they're good for your eyes!

Eat the crust on the bread - it'll make your hair curly.

If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

If it were a snake, it would have bitten you.

You won't be happy until you break it, will you?

There's enough dirt in those ears to grow potatoes!

Do I have to send you a written invitation?!
Sit down and eat!

How do you know you don't like it if you haven't tasted it?