Title: Small Miracles
Author: Susan, SStroud@aol.com
Summary: Harm and Mac await the arrival of their first child.
Disclaimer: I don't own them and no money is being made off of this.
Thanks to Linda for providing information for this story even though I did call her very early in the morning to get it. Thanks to Kim for editing. Special thanks to Selena for not letting me toss this one in the trashcan, but encouraging me to finish it.

1200 Zulu
June 7
Harm and Mac's House


Harm walked into the house and headed to the kitchen. "Something smells delicious."

Mac turned to face him and smiled. "It's breakfast. How was your run?"

"Lonely." He crossed the kitchen and leaned down to give her a gentle kiss. "Good morning."

"Good morning yourself." Mac replied as he dropped to his knees in front of her.

Mac couldn't help the smile that crossed her face as Harm placed a kiss on her belly. "Good morning in there, too. Daddy loves you."

Mac watched him as he placed his hands on her abdomen and felt for movement. When he felt the baby kick, he looked up at her and smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too, Harm."

He quickly placed another kiss on her belly before standing up and capturing her lips in a kiss that left her breathless. "I'm going to go grab a quick shower. Save me some food, will you?"

"We'll try." Mac called to his retreating form. She sighed as she placed her hands on her stomach. This had become their morning ritual since the day she had found out that she was pregnant. Harm would start every morning with a kiss and a declaration of his love for both her and the baby. The first time had brought tears to Mac's eyes. He had reverently caressed her then-still-flat stomach before placing a feather light kiss on it and whispering, "Daddy loves you." She hadn't thought it was possible to love him any more, but when he did that, she found herself falling in love with him all over again.

Mac shook herself from her memories and finished making breakfast. They were expected in Admiral Chegwidden's office at 0800 and being pregnant was not a valid excuse for being late.

2000 Zulu
June 7
JAG Headquarters


Mac shifted in her chair as she listened to Harm deliver his closing arguments. The pain in her back that had started after breakfast had progressed to the point where it was uncomfortable to sit still. She laid her hand on her swollen abdomen as she watched Harm gracefully pace in front of the jury.

Since their wedding three years ago, Harm and Mac rarely ever worked on the same case, much less on the same side. However, Admiral Chegwidden had made an exception for this particular case. The Admiral had claimed that he was doing it to allow them to spend some quality time together before the baby arrived, but they both knew better. Lieutenant Tanner had served under Admiral Chegwidden at one time and the Admiral wanted to make sure that he got a fair trial. Besides, they still had three months before the baby was due. There was still plenty of opportunity for shared quality time.

A frown creased Mac's brow as she felt a stab of pain in her abdomen. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly as Harm finished his argument and returned to his seat. He shot her a questioning glance as he sat down next to her. She offered him a faint smile and reached over to give his leg a reassuring squeeze.

Harm helped Mac to her feet as Judge Thompson recessed court for jury deliberations. They turned to face Lieutenant Tanner as the courtroom began to clear out. Harm smiled at the young man standing in front of him. "It won't be long now, Lieutenant."

Lieutenant Tanner returned his smile. "Regardless of the verdict, Sir, I want you to know how much I appreciate what you and Colonel MacKenzie have done for me."

Harm reached out to shake his hand. "Don't thank us until the jury acquits you, Lieutenant."

"And they're going to." Mac added. "The prosecution didn't come close to proving their case."

Lieutenant Tanner smiled again. "Thank you, Ma'am. Now if you'll excuse me, I would like to spend some time with my wife and daughter."

"Enjoy the afternoon, Lieutenant." Harm said as he started gathering up his paperwork.

Mac turned to face Harm as Lieutenant Tanner made his way out of the courtroom. "Your closing was excellent, Commander."

Harm grinned at her. "Thank you, Colonel. Are you feeling okay? You look a little pale."

"I'm fine, Harm. Your son was just letting me know what he thought about the trial."

Harm smiled as he closed his briefcase. "My son. I like the sound of that, but what exactly makes you so sure that we're having a boy?"

Mac returned his smile as she gathered up her papers. "Just a feeling, Harm."

Harm placed his hand at the small of her back as she proceeded him down the aisle to the back of the courtroom. As they reached the back row, another pain shot through Mac causing her to stop moving and clutch at her stomach.

"Mac, what is it?" Harm could read the fear in her eyes as she tried to breathe through the pain. "Is it the baby?"

Mac spoke through gritted teeth. "I don't know, Harm. It hurts."

Harm looked around the courtroom and spotted the bailiff. "Go call an ambulance." The bailiff nodded an acknowledgement and ran out of the courtroom as Harm helped Mac to sit down.

Harm waited until Mac released the breath that she had been holding to question her further. "Where does it hurt, Mac?"

"My back mostly, but also in my stomach." Mac replied with tears in her eyes. "I'm scared, Harm. I don't want to lose our baby."

Harm wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against his chest. "We're not going to lose this baby, Mac. You're going to be fine. Both of you." Harm stroked her hair as she clung to him.

2114 Zulu
Mercy General


Mac watched from the hospital bed as Harm paced back and forth across the room. "Harm." He stopped and turned to look at her as she motioned with her hand. "Come and sit with me. You're making me nervous with all of that pacing."

Harm smiled sheepishly as he approached the bed. "I'm sorry, Mac. It's just that the waiting is driving me nuts."

"I know, Honey." Mac scooted to the side of the bed to make room for him. "Get in."

Harm climbed into the bed beside her and wrapped his arms around her. She shifted in his arms until she could rest her head on his chest. "You hear that beeping, Harm?" Mac looked up at him as he nodded his head. "That's our son's heartbeat. He's doing fine."

Harm leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you."

"I love you, too." Mac replied as she snuggled into his embrace.

A knock at the door was followed by Dr. Kathy Hill entering the room.

She smiled when she saw them curled up on the bed. "Hello, Sarah. Hello, Harm. I'm sorry that it took me so long to get down here. I was in the middle of delivering twins when I got the page that you were here." She picked up Mac's chart as she continued. "Dr. Tait tells me that you've been experiencing back and stomach pains."

Mac sat back up and looked over at her doctor. "The backache started this morning after breakfast. I didn't think anything of it at the time. I thought that it was just due to having sat so much this week in court. Then this afternoon during closing arguments, I started having severe stomach cramps."

Dr. Hill walked over to check the readout on the fetal monitor. "Have you had any bleeding?"

Mac shook her head. "No. Nothing else unusual has happened."

Dr. Hill walked back over to stand beside the bed as Harm spoke up. "What do you think it is?"

"I'd like to do an ultrasound if that's okay. It will help me to rule out anything serious."

Mac looked over at Harm who nodded his agreement. "Let's do it. The sooner the better."

Dr. Hill smiled at them. "Don't worry. We're going to take excellent care of your baby."

Mac returned her smile. "I know. Thank you, Kathy."

"You're welcome, Sarah. I'm going to go get the equipment and I'll be back before you know it."

Harm sighed and pulled Mac back against him as Dr. Hill left the room. He placed his hands over her abdomen and gently caressed her. Mac placed her hands over his and they laughed as the baby kicked. "He knows your touch, Harm."

"Sarah..." Harm started, but he couldn't bring himself to finish. He couldn't find the words to express how terrified he was at the thought of something going wrong.

"I know, Harm." She laced her fingers through his and held tightly. "We'll just have to go through this the same way we do everything else. Together."

2200 Zulu
Mercy General


Harm and Mac sat quietly in the hospital room trying to absorb the information Dr. Hill had just presented them with. Harm moved from the bedside chair up to the bed. He sat down behind Mac and pulled her back until she was snuggled against his chest. "I love you, Sarah."

Mac buried her face in his chest and wrapped her arms around him as they drew strength from each other. This was going to be the hardest decision of their lives.

The ultrasound had confirmed Dr. Hill's suspicions that Mac had a placental abruption. She had left them alone to decide what they wanted to do. They only had two choices and neither one of them guaranteed that their baby would survive. Dr. Hill had carefully explained what their decision would entail.

If they opted to induce labor, their baby would be born at only 28 weeks. Although the survival rate of premature babies was over 70%, there were still no guarantees. Their baby would need to be put on a respirator and they were running the risk of permanent hearing and vision loss. Not to mention that he wouldn't weigh more than three or four pounds.

On the other hand, they could decide to have Mac admitted to the hospital for the duration of her pregnancy where she could be constantly monitored. Unfortunately, since the placenta was already abrupted, she could start hemorrhaging at any time and they would have to perform an emergency C-section to save the baby and she could end up needing a blood transfusion. Not to mention the fact that the baby could go into duress at any time which would also lead to an emergency C-section.

How were they supposed to make that kind of decision? Harm sighed as he hugged her closer to his chest. "What do you think, Mac?"

Mac took a deep breath and sat up to look at Harm. She closed her eyes against the tears that threatened to spill down her cheeks. Harm reached out and gently stroked her cheek with his thumb. "It's okay to cry, Mac. You don't have to be a Marine in here. In here we can just be scared parents."

The tears fell slowly down Mac's cheeks as she opened her eyes and saw the tears streaming down Harm's face. "My gut says that we should have this baby now. I don't want to run the risk of something going wrong and costing us his life. At least this way, he'll be in the hands of the most capable Neonatal physicians and he'll have a fighting chance."

Harm smiled through his tears. "That's what my gut is telling me too. It looks like we're having a baby."

Mac leaned back into his embrace. "We need to call your mom and Frank. They should be here, just in case."

Harm nodded as he gently rocked her in his arms. "I'll call them after we talk to Dr. Hill. And I'll make sure to let the Admiral know what's going on."

"Whatever happens, Harm, I want you to know that I love you."

"I love you too, Mac." Harm laid his cheek on her head as he held her in his arms. He let the tears flow as the magnitude of their decision hit him. He was holding his family in his arms for what could possibly be the last time.

1700 Zulu
June 8
Mercy General


Admiral Chegwidden slowly paced back and forth across the waiting room. It had been over thirty minutes since Harm had been out to inform them that Mac was in the final stages of labor and they hadn't heard anything since then. Frank and Trisha Burnett were sitting on the far side of the room with Bud and Harriet who were trying their best to keep everyone's spirit up as they waited for news on the baby. A.J. sighed as he stopped pacing and leaned against the wall. This wasn't supposed to be happening now. They had worked so hard to get to where they were. They didn't deserve this.

The waiting room doors opened and Harm walked into the room. He was quickly surrounded by the five people who were anxiously awaiting to hear what was going on. Harm smiled as he looked at the group. "We have a son." Before they had an opportunity to offer congratulations, Harm continued. "He checked in at 17 inches long weighing three pounds and eight ounces." Harm looked around at the shocked faces that surrounded him. "He's tiny, but he's strong. They've taken him up to the NICU and they said that you can go up and look in the window if you want."

Admiral Chegwidden broke the silence that settled on the group. "How is Mac doing?"

Harm smiled at his C.O. "Physically, she's as tough as ever. Emotionally, it's been pretty rough." Harm turned back to face Trish. "He's beautiful, mom."

Trish smiled as she reached out to hug her son. "I'm sure he is, Harm."

Harm returned her embrace and then straightened up. "I'm going to go back in there now. I don't want to leave Mac alone for any longer than necessary."

The small group watched as Harm disappeared back through the waiting room doors. This time it was Frank who broke the silence. "Now all we can do is pray."

2110 Zulu
Mercy General


Harm heard the agitation in Mac's voice while he was still outside of her room. "I want to see my son!"

"Sarah, I understand that you want to see him, but right now it's more important that you get some rest." Dr. Hill replied calmly as Harm entered the room.

Mac sat up in the bed and swung her legs over the side. "I don't want to rest. I want to see my son!"

Harm made his way over to Mac's side. "Hey, what's all the commotion in here?"

"I just want to see him, Harm. Why won't they let me see him?" The anger that had been present only moments ago had been replaced by silent tears as she turned her attention to Harm. "I just want to see him."

Harm wrapped his arms around her and held her as she sobbed into his chest. He turned his attention to Dr. Hill. "Kathy?"

"Harm, Sarah has just spent the last twenty hours in labor. She needs to rest and quite frankly, so do you."

Harm nodded his agreement. "You're right. We both need some rest. I'm not going to stand here and argue that point with you. However, as you pointed out, my wife has just spent the last twenty hours in labor bringing our son into this world. Our son, who is up in Intensive Care fighting for his life and she hasn't even been allowed to see him yet." Harm paused as he looked back down at Mac. "Now, I'm sure that you have policies in place for these types of circumstances, but I think it would be best for everyone involved if you let us go up and see our son. After we have done that, I will personally see to it that Sarah gets in the bed and doesn't even think about trying to get out of it until tomorrow morning."

Dr. Hill sighed and turned to one of the nurses. "Would you please bring in a wheelchair for Mrs. Rabb?" She turned back to Harm and Mac. "Fine. I'll take you up there myself, but then I expect both of you to get some sleep."

Harm lifted Mac's face up to look at him. "Is that agreeable with you? First we go see our son and then we'll get some sleep? No visitors until morning?"

Mac nodded her agreement as the nurse returned with the wheelchair. After getting Mac settled comfortably in the chair, Dr. Hill escorted them up to the NICU. They were stopped at the nurses station by an older gentleman that Dr. Hill introduced as Dr. Jonathan Baker. He was the attending neonatal physician and was the man responsible for overseeing the care of their son.

"Mr. and Mrs. Rabb, I'm sure that you'll have a lot of questions and I want you to feel free to voice your concerns. However, right now I'm sure that you're anxious to see your son so why don't we go on in and let you meet him and then I'll be happy to answer any questions that you have."

Dr. Baker introduced them to the head NICU nurse, Alexis, who helped them get gowned up and then escorted them in to see their son. Alexis pushed Mac's wheelchair up along side of the incubator that held the tiny infant and motioned for Harm to walk around to other side. Mac looked up at Dr. Baker. "Can we touch him?"

Dr. Baker smiled. "Sure, just slide your hands in the openings on the side of the incubator."

Mac and Harm both slid their hands into the openings and gently caressed their son. They were both careful not to disturb any of the wires or tubes that were sustaining their son's life as they gently stroked every inch of exposed skin. Mac looked up at Harm as the tears streamed down her face. "Harm, he's perfect."

Harm watched with tears in his eyes as Mac traced her finger along his tiny hands and feet. "He needs a name, Mac."

Mac met Harm's gaze again as she spoke softly. "Joshua. Joshua MacKenzie."

Harm looked back down at his son. "Joshua MacKenzie Rabb. That's quite a mouthful for such a little guy."

Mac smiled up at him. "He'll grow into it."

Harm reached through the incubator and took one of her hands in his as he returned her smile. "Joshua MacKenzie it is then."

Mac squeezed Harm's hand as she traced her finger along Joshua's cheek. "Hello, Joshua."

Harm reached up and ran his finger along the shell of Joshua's ear as he whispered softly, "Hello, Joshua. Daddy loves you."

1200 Zulu
June 9
Mercy General
Mac's Room


A soft knock sounded on the door and Harm moved from Mac's side to open it. He found Harriet and Bud standing there holding a bouquet of flowers. "Good morning, Sir." Bud stated. "I hope we didn't wake you."

Harm smiled. "Bud, how many times do I have to tell you to call me Harm?"

"Sorry, Sir." Bud replied as Harm stepped out of the doorway so they could enter the room.

Harriet made her way over to Mac as Bud handed the flowers to Harm. "Good morning, Mac. How do you feel?"

Mac pushed herself up in the bed. "A little sore, but other than that, I feel great."

Bud and Harm made their way over to the bed after Harm had placed the flowers on one of the small tables in the room. Mac smiled at Harriet and Bud. "Thank you for the flowers."

"You're welcome, Ma'am." Bud answered.

"Have you been up to see Joshua yet?" Mac asked.

"We went up for a minute last night." Harriet answered softly. "Has there been any change in his condition?"

"No." Harm sat on the side of the bed as he took Mac's hand in his.

Dr. Baker had carefully explained Joshua's condition to them last night. Due to his early arrival, his lungs weren't fully developed so they had him hooked to a ventilator which was doing all of his breathing for him. They also had a heart monitor on him to make sure that his heart rhythm was normal, as well as an I.V. to make sure that he was getting plenty of nutrition.

Mac squeezed Harm's hand as she looked up at Harriet. "Isn't he beautiful, Harriet?"

Harriet smiled at the enthusiasm in Mac's voice. "He is beautiful, Mac. Have you taken any snapshots yet?"

Harm got up and grabbed a stack of polaroids off of the bedside table. "Alexis took these for us."

"We met her last night." Bud stated as he looked over Harriet's shoulder at the pictures.

Harriet pulled one of the pictures out of the stack. "Is it okay if I take this one?"

Mac looked at the picture she held in her hands. It was one of the last ones Alexis had taken the night before. It was a picture of Joshua lying in his incubator with his name clearly printed at the foot of it. "Sure, Harriet." Mac nodded. "But why?"

Harriet handed the rest of the stack back to Harm as she tucked the photo into her purse. "You wouldn't believe how many calls we had last night from people wanting to know how you and Joshua were doing. I thought that I might put this up at JAG so everyone could see what a beautiful little boy you have." Harriet looked over at Harm. "If it's okay with you, Sir, I'd like to put it next to the sonogram picture that you have on your office door."

Harm smiled up at her. "I think that would be wonderful, Harriet. Thank you."

Bud glanced at his watch. "We need to get going. We just wanted to stop in and check on you before we headed into work."

Harriet leaned over and hugged Mac as Harm stood up to walk them out. "Take care of yourself, Mac."

"Thank you, Harriet." Mac whispered.

Harriet released her and turned to hug Harm. "And you make sure that she gets plenty of rest."

"Yes, Ma'am." Harm replied as she pulled away from him.

Bud turned towards the door, then stopped. "By the way, Lieutenant Tanner said to tell you thank you. They found him not guilty and returned him to active duty."

"I'm glad to hear that." Harm stated.

Bud and Harriet made their exit and Harm turned back to Mac. "How about if I go get a nurse to get us a wheelchair and we go say hello to our son?"

Mac smiled up at him. "I love the way you think, Sailor."

1314 Zulu
Mercy General
NICU


Harm looked up from where his son was sleeping peacefully and saw Admiral Chegwidden looking in through the window. Harm excused himself from the small group consisting of Mac, Trish and Frank and made his way out to where the Admiral was standing. "Good morning, Sir."

"Good morning, Harm." Admiral Chegwidden continued to stare into the nursery. "How is he doing?"

"He's stable, Sir. Why don't you come in and see him?"

Admiral Chegwidden turned his attention to Harm. "I don't want to intrude, Harm. I just wanted to make sure that you're all doing okay."

Harm nodded his head in understanding. "We're doing fine, Sir, but you wouldn't be intruding." Harm looked past the Admiral in to where he could see Mac gently caressing their son. "You've played a very important role in both of our lives, Sir. If it weren't for your support, Mac and I would have never made it this far." Harm looked back at the Admiral. "I would consider it an honor if you would allow me the privilege of introducing you to my son."

Admiral Chegwidden smiled. "Sometimes I forget just how good you are when it comes to persuading others to your point of view, Commander."

Harm returned his smile. "I learned from the best, Sir." Harm motioned towards the door. "Come on, there's someone you need to meet."

After donning a surgical gown, Admiral Chegwidden made his way into the nursery and over to Joshua's incubator. Mac looked up at him and smiled. "Good morning, Sir. I don't believe you've been properly introduced to the newest member of the family. This is Joshua MacKenzie."

Admiral Chegwidden smiled as he looked down at Joshua. "He's beautiful." He looked over at Harm and Mac. "You two did a wonderful job."

Harm returned his smile. "Thank you, Sir." Harm looked down at Mac and nodded at her.

"Sir, Harm and I were wondering if you would do us the honor of being his godfather?"

Admiral Chegwidden looked back down at Joshua. "I would be honored."

Harm and Mac exchanged a smile as they watched Admiral Chegwidden slide his hands into the incubator and gently caress Joshua's hand. "Welcome to the world, Joshua."

Four Weeks Later
Harm and Mac's House


Harm opened the front door and stepped back to allow Mac to enter. The room was filled with balloons and streamers welcoming Joshua home. Mac gasped as she walked through the door with Joshua snuggled safely in her arms. "Harm?"

Harm smiled as he closed the door behind them. "Bud wanted to throw a surprise party, but Harriet managed to convince him that we would want to spend some time alone with our son. As a show of appreciation, I agreed that they could decorate the room to celebrate Joshua's homecoming."

Mac smiled as she looked down at the tiny bundle in her arms. "Did you hear that? Everybody loves you."

Harm smiled as he watched Mac talk to their son. It had been a long, emotionally draining four weeks, but having Joshua here with them now made it all worth it. Every second spent sitting in a chair beside his incubator, every tear that had fallen as they wondered if he was going to make it, every phone call updating their friends on his condition, and every night that had been spent holding on to each other trying to reassure themselves that things were going to turn out okay. It had all ceased to matter the moment that they had unhooked him from the ventilator and Joshua had taken his first breath by himself. The tears had streamed down their faces as Alexis had lifted him out of the incubator and placed him in Mac's arms. Harm had watched as Mac leaned down and kissed him and in that moment Harm knew that there was no feeling in the world greater than watching the woman he loved more than life itself holding their son in her arms for the first time.

Harm looked over at where Mac was showing Joshua all of the various balloons and couldn't help the laugh that escaped.

Mac turned around to face him. "Something funny, Sailor?"

Harm shook his head and walked over to her. "I'm just incredibly happy, Mac."

Mac smiled as Harm leaned down and kissed Joshua before straightening up and looking at her. "I love you, Mac."

"I love you too, Harm. We both do."


The End