Murray Walker's 'Walker-isms'

THE MAN HIMSELF!
Blame where blame's due: Andrew Henry who is one of the best-informed regulars
on rec.autos.sport and keeper of the FAQ, started off this collection; I put it
on the Web and have been collecting additions to it for the last few years. Mail
me (pete.fenelon@zetnet.co.uk) your Walkerisms! Implicit ackonwledgements are
due to everyone who's got quotes listed on the page, to everyone who's got
quotes I'm still sitting on, and to everyone involved in bringing Murray to our
screens.
Murray Walker is the commentator for much British motorsports coverage including
F1 on ITV and the BTCC on the BBC. He is a motorsports enthusiast. He is also
prone to spouting rubbish in the heat of the moment in spite of his vast
experience of commentating for Grand Prix racing. According to those who've met
him, he's a nice bloke too.
For a while it looked as though 1996 would represent the last chance for us to
hear the great Muddly Talker in action as the BBC have lost the television
rights to F1, but it's been confirmed that he will be joining ITV to do their
commentary - just think of the opportunities for idiosyncratic commentary which
will be offered by the dreaded Commercial Breaks.
In fact, Murray adapted brilliantly to the change of environment, and partnered
by the excellent Martin Brundle whose dry wit and in-depth knowledge of F1 his
commentary continues to reach new heights. Long may he continue to befuddle,
confuse, excite and infuriate us -- racing truly won't be the same without him.
All Murray fans should try to get hold of a copy of the brilliant Murray's Magic
Moments video -- a couple of hours of great F1 nostalgia from Murray's days with
the Beeb, including some of the more famous mistakes here. As a history of the
last 20 or so years of F1 it's fantastic....
For an excellent retro on Murray's time at the mic on Grand Prix, look no
further than the article in AUTOSPORT on 24/10/96, or for an excellent
interview, look at Motor Sport's January issue.
Apparently Murray has seen this page and enjoyed it!
Without further ado -- here's the quotes!

Sorry about the delays in updating towards the back end of the '97 season --
changs of address, work, computers and pretty much everything else conspired to
delay updates. Anyway, keep mailing the updates in for '98.
Counter, for those who like 'em. (Installed 29/4/97).
Here we go:

"He's obviously gone in for a wheel change. I say obviously because I can't see
it"
"With half the race gone, there is half the race still to go"
"Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna's Lotus sounding rough ?"
"Anything happens in Grand Prix racing and it usually does"
"Alboreto has dropped back up to fifth place"
"As you look at the first four, the significant thing is that Alboreto is 5th"
"I can't imagine what kind of problem Senna has. I imagine it must be some sort
of grip problem"
"He is shedding buckets of adrenalin in that car"
"It's raining and the track is wet"
"And there's just a few more corners for Nigel Mansell to go to win the Canadian
Grand Prix...and...he's going rather slow....HE'S STOPPING HE'S STOPPING!"
"and this is the third placed car about to lap the second placed car"
"they say clothes maketh the man... the clothes are Niki Lauda's, but the
contents are me..." as Murray prepares to take a drive in a F1 car." [He gets a
total distance of... oh, 1 foot before he stalls it.] (Apparently, this was the
second attempt to film Murray in an F1 McLaren - the first, earlier that day,
had gone very well, but for technical reasons couldn't be used!)
[During a F1 race, describing how the leader can see the driver following him]
"... Mansell can see him in his earphone..."
"So Bernie [Ecclestone], in the seventeen years since you bought McLaren, which
of your many achievements do you think was the most memorable ?" Bernie Answers,
"Well I don't remember buying McLaren." [Bernie Ecclestone used to own the
Brabham team].
Murrary: "What's that? There's a BODY on the track!!!" James: "Um, I think that
that is a piece of BODY-WORK, from someone's car."
Murray: There's a fiery glow coming from the back of the Ferrari James: No
Murray, that's his rear safety light
As an introductory piece for a rallysprint race, Murray was put in the
Navigator's seat alongside Tony Pond in a Chevette HSR (270 BHP, rwd, and
TWITCHY), added an in-car camera, and wired Murray for sound. The result can be
deduced by extrapolating his usual excitement and enthusiasm, and adding a large
pinch of raw terror! "And there's a 600 foot drop on my left..AND we're doing
120 mph... AND we're approaching a hairpin...OH MY GOD we're going to die..."
[after a post race interview with Mansell after the Austrian GP 1987] Murray :
"How did you get that nasty bumb on your head Nigel?" [Nigel leans forward to
show the camera as Murray pokes it with his finger !] Nigel: "OWCH!!"

And these are from Sylvan Smyth:
"...Cruel luck for Alesi, second on the grid. That's the first time he had
started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier
this year..."
James: "And now what's wrong with Prost's car?"
Murray: "It's not Prost's car it's that joker in the striped shirt!"
"Ah! Now here's Senna in the pits (for the black flag). No point in saying I
wish I could lip read: I can't even see his lips! There's Ron Dennis bending
over at the right. This is A-! Out gets Senna! For whatever reason and I just
hope we can get a message about this. I hope we can get a message. Ayrton Senna
with, with rage and impotent fury etched in every line of his body, reluctantly
drags himself out of the McLaren." (In reality Senna calmly stepped out of the
car and walked away.)
"Well let's, uh, lugsh, luxurrriate in a little hypothesis and try to work out
what, if anything, is wrong with Alain Prost." (Prost was being caught by Berger
late in the race.) "Has he got tire problems? Very unlikely. Is Prost having
fuel trouble? Well, who knows? I think it's a bit unlikely. Is Prost having
gearbox trouble? I can't tell you. And since P, uh, Prost is unlikely to come on
the radio and let me know you'll have to guess along with me."
"ANNDD! We have a, uh, I - (laughing) - I, uh, I'm S- (still laughing). I have
to eat humble pie again, for all the people out there. Uh, we have a lap
scorrring problem and, uh, I have to rather lamely tell you that, uh, it's still
Gerhard Berger in 2nd place. It's Berger in 3rd position. In four- in- in-. Um,
Boutsen in 3rd position..."
"That's 55 laps completed by both Prost and Berger and and and and and the
expeeerrrienced Alain Prost is really responding."
Sylvan Smyth again: I only replayed my Brazilian GP tape because I vaguely
remembered Murray saying "and" five or six times in a row several years ago. I
had forgotten what a Murrayism gold mine that race was. Some people don't like
Murray. I think some people should switch to decaf...

And here are some from Clive Stonebridge:
"And there's the man in the green flag!"
"The Jordan factory is at the factory gates"

And some from me:
Murray: And look at the flames coming from the back of Berger's McLaren
James: Actually, Murray, they're not flames, it's the safety light.
Murray, commentating on rallycross from Lydden, describes how a BMW driver has
cut holes in his windscreen so that his visibility is improved in all the
muck... as he is doing so, the car crashes heavily into an earth bank...

Mike Griffiths: reports:
"...and there's no damage to the car.....except to the car itself."
"The beak of Ayrton Senna's chicken is pulling ahead"

Helen Gerald adds:
'and I interrupt myself to bring you this....'
and the catchphrase 'Unless I'm very much mistaken....I AM very much mistaken!'

Colin Reed has spotted the following:
"This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but
down as well."
"Only a few more laps to go and then the action will begin, unless this is the
action, which it is."
"This has been a great season for Nelson Piquet, as he is now known, and always
has been"
"And the first five places are filled by five different cars."

Kevin Lee's observations:
"...the lead is now 6.9 seconds. In fact it's just under 7 seconds"
"Tambay's hopes , which were nil before, are absolutely zero now."
"You can't see a digital clock because there isn't one."

Stu Soltysiak:
"...and Blundell is doing very well in sixth position...in fact he's lapping 2.5
seconds faster than Blundell who is in fifth position" [PF: Given the trouble
Murray had with Brundle and Blundell perhaps it's fortunate that Mark's racing
in the USA now. How on earth will he cope with Schumacher and Schumacher?]

Anthony Long adds the following:
"The Italian GP at Monaco..."
"I'm applying intelligence and observation to the situation..."
"Schumacher's appeal for ignoring the chequered flag is next Tuesday."
...the enthusiastic enthusiasts... (Italy 1994)
"Martin's got a bald spot - he won't be pleased..." (Germany, 1994, as Brundle
retires, and climbs out of the car. Murray stops talking about the broken
McLaren as soon as he sees Martin's head)
"...and Andretti is going very slowly - he must have an electrical problem of
some sort... "(Andretti is touring on three wheels, having hit something solid)
[PF: this reminds me of several Ferrari retirements which were described as
"electrical problems". Mechanics would give the lie to this saying things like
"yes, it was an electrical problem. A conrod went through the block and knocked
the distributor off!"]

Dave Oldcorn reports:
...but Here is Now and There is Damon Hill [PF adds: nice bit of Iambic
Pentameter there]

Steven Wheeler gives us the following:
"So now you're looking at the battle between Frentzen and Herbert for 7th place.
Heinz Harald Frentzen in the Sauber Mercedes behind Johnny Herbert, behind him
Johnny Herbert in his first race in the Ligier Renault..."

Evan Metcalf noticed this classic:
`Ukyo Katayama is undoubtedly the best formula 1 driver that grand prix racing
has ever produced' [then again, there's probably people on the net who believe
this�.]
...and the Peugeot cup of misery is filled past overflowing...

Here's a few more from Stu Soltysiak's eagle-eyed listening [grin] to MW in
Adelaide.
"We're watching the Finnish Driver who is third, but he won't for very much
llllong...oh yeah, he might be actually"
"And an enormous gap building before Mika Hakkinen goes through in third
position...when I say enormous it's 1.5 seconds"
"Schumacher is still the fastest man on the track, not only by virtue of the
fact that he leads the Australian Grand Prix, but he also holds the fastest lap"

"Eddie Irvine with smoke pouring up from the eng...I suspect something's locked
up and he's out of the race"
JP: "And Alesi spins there...spins out of the race, surely... "Yes!...NO! Alesi
manages to keep the engine, does not stall, but of course he will have lost the
place I think. No! he's kept the place"
"Yes, the beauty of this race is that it is totally unpredictable"
"Michael Schumacher leading Damon Hill by four tenths of a second or so, because
it's moving...[cut to Hill under Schu's rear wing] AND THAT'S NOT FOUR TENTHS OF
A SECOND! That's Michael Schumacher!"

Chris "Bart" Simpson adds the following classic Murray/James duet:
Murray: "And there are flames coming from the back of Prost's car as he enters
the swimming pool."
James: "Well, that should put them out then."

John McIlroy sends us another rallycross classic:
Rallycross at Lydden Hill. "And Keith Ripp comes round Chesson's Drift, avoids
the Hatter's bank..." [upon which little yellow Mini commences its ascent] "...
BUT HE DOES NOT!!!!!" [Mini now 30 feet in air, lands heavily and performs six
rolls before stopping] "...and BANG, BANG, OVER, OVER goes the Mini..." A
quality moment.

A couple more I spotted:
From the Spanish GP 1995: "and Eddie Jordan is in fifth place"... (actually
Eddie Irvine in one of his compatriot Eddie Jordan's cars).
"...and he's lost both right front tyres" (which may have been accurate back in
the days of the Tyrrell P34, but it was from 1995!)

Ted Henderson adds:
"Alesi is in second place and Hill is in second place..."
"As you can see, visually, with your eyes..."

Andrew Wood donates the following:
"Andrea de Cesaris...the man who has won more Grands Prix than anyone else
without actually winning one of them."

Steven Jeffery adds: "And here comes Berger, out of Tabac and into the swimming
pool." -- Gerhard wasn't emulating Alberto Ascari [and Paul Hawkins], however,
and carried on past the swimming pool!

Anthony Holloway gives us the following gem:
'Oh that's the Forti, and, it looks like, err, its Roberto Moreno's car , the
err Brazilian .. I was going to say the elderly Brazilian , he's only 36 but
he's actually the oldest driver in the race at the present moment, though he's
just retired from it!'
And:
'Hill, Hill ... Hill is in, he's beneath me now.. .and he's got slicks! its
slicks! he got a new set of slicks! this is strange' (as it was raining!)

Erik Michael spotted this:
"....Schumacher crosses the line to start another lap, and there's nothing
there!"

Some from Helen Gerald:
'Right underneath me, Michael Schumacher!'
'Jonathan, you're the ace forecaster...' (really?)
'I hate to be a Jeremiah, but I have to tell you that the clouds are
lowering...'
'The plot thickens, because the Williams team are out now.'
Tony Jardine; 'The Benetton man doesn't know what day it is!' (Who does?)
(as the coverage flips back and forth, missing the interesting bits) 'It's not
my job to produce the programme, so I'll say nothing!' (Good point, Murray,
definite 'could do better' for the French producer)

Some history from Mike Bees
and (during one of the practice sessions "... this is the part of the circuit
where the Williams tends to be, not tends to be is slower than the Benetton
historically, today."

And some from Jon Jennings
"And an enormous gap now building before Mika Hakkinen goes through in third
place. When I say enormous, it's one and a half seconds."
"The Benetton handling superbly as ever. Williams have worked very very hard on
this car at the beginning of the season."
"That's not four tenths of a second. Look at it. It's Michael Schumacher."

J G Gilmartin spotted the following:
(talking about bumps and puddles in the circuit, which Jonathan Palmer used to
test on when McLaren had Honda engines.....) ".....and there's few [drivers]
that know them more and even less better than you Jonathan....."

Some recent ones from Charlotte Giles
And we have had 5 races so far this year, Brazil, Argentina, Imola, Schumacher
and Monaco!
And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the
Williams pit, and Damon Hill in the pit, no it's Michael Schumacher!

Some from Andy Lawton:
Monaco:-
"And there's a dry line appearing in the tunnel" (pause while he realises what
he's just said) "Obvious really as it has a roof"
[PF: that's one of only two Walker GP commentaries I've missed, one when I was
in the USA (I see what they mean about Daly and Varsha!) and Monaco '96, and by
God I wished there was some dry there, I got thoroughly soaked!]
Belgium:-
"And the Williams pit are getting ready for Hill, the tyre coolers are coming
off"

M Kowal sends the following:
Belgium '96:
"...and now, just in case there is any CONFUSION (operative term here) this is
the race order on lap 19: David Coulthard leads and has yet to stop; Hakkinen
leads and has yet to stop..."

Ross Mansell (no relation?) adds:
"The McLaren is being pushed by the Mercedes"
[PF: Given '95 and early '96 McLaren performances, who knows!]

A vast collection from Graham Digweed
"A Mars a day helps you work, rest and play" [he once worked in
advertising]
"Bolster's gone off!" [his first words on the BBC in 1949] [PF: John Bolster was
later technical editor of Autosport and himself known as a BBC commentator in
later years, usually working with Raymond Baxter]
"Nigel Mansell - the man of the race - the man of the day - the man from the
Isle of Man"
"An Achilles heel for the McLaren team this year, and it's literally the heel
because it's the gearbox"
"And now the boot is on the other Schumacher" [PF: One I suppose we'll see lots
of next year :)]
"The atmosphere is so tense you could cut it with a cricket stump"
"Alain Prost is in a commanding second place" [PF: Worthy of Nigel Roebuck at
his most Prostophilic!]
"Now the Frenchman Jacques Lafitte is as close to Surer as Surer is to Lafitte"
"I don't make mistakes. I make prophecies which immediately turn out to be
wrong" [Murray on his style of commentary]
"I am inclined to go over the top and I know it. I am communicating an electric
situation"
"I like to think I come over as a slightly over-the-top enthusiast. It is a very
exciting sport after all"
[after Derek Warwick spun at Monaco ending up facing the wrong way...] "Now he
must not go the wrong way round the circuit, and unless he can spin himself
stationary through 360 degrees I fail to see how he can avoid doing so."
[possibly Murray's most ecstatic moment when Mansell passed Senna to win in
Hungary after starting well down the grid] "He's going for it! OH MY
GOODNESS...HE'S THROOOOOOUGH!!!"
"We're now on the 73rd lap and the next one will be the 74th." [Monaco 1992]
"James has just nipped out to have a look at the far side of the circuit"
[Actually James Hunt would leave the commentary box to smoke a joint!]
"If they have any shillelaghs in Suzuka, they'll be playing them
tonight." [after Eddie Irvine's 6th place in his first grand prix] [PF: I think
Eddie and Ayrton Senna were using shillelaghs correctly somewhere else at about
that time :)]
"He's watching us from hospital with his injured knee"
"In his quiter moments he sounds like his trousers are on fire" [Clive James on
Murray Walker]
"Mansell is slowing it down, taking it easy. Oh no he isn't! It's a lap record."

"It's not quite a curve, it's a straight actually." [PF: I assume this is
actually referring to the Tamburello at Imola]
"And Senna wins the 1999 Monaco Grand Prix" [from the 1990 Monaco GP] [PF:
Alas�]
[hysterical as ever] "And that's Alboreto OFF!" [long pause - somber voice] "Now
Michele Alboreto did not in fact qualify for the race, so how we managed to see
him go off I don't know. We'll let you know." [Even longer pause, now laughing]
"Now I'm
not a technician, but it appears a shot of Michele Alboreto going off in
qualifying has crept into this live transmission, thank you Mr. Producer, anyway
that was qualifying, this is the race..."
[Alesi, then in a Tyrrell, was passed by Senna at Detroit, or was he...] "And
Senna's going through on the inside, or is he, YES!, but now Alesi has the
inside, side by side, Alesi! Wow! Great Stuff!" [PF: It was, too - one of the
finest battles for years!]

Jan F Eveleens adds this perceptive comment on the Hungarian GP:
"This race will actually develop into a Grand prix"

From an unknown correspondent at Broadway School:
'..and Damon Hill is following Damon Hill'
'Jean Alesi is 4th and 5th'
'Schumacher has made his final stop three times!'
'And he has been lapped 9th, 10th, 11th' This was in reference to Jacques
Villeneuve, who was leading at the time, and there were only 11 cars running
anyway!
'Nigel Mansell had a problem with the wheel-nut on his Williams, then he went on
to win brilliantly for Ferrari!'
And finally, one from the Nurburgring. Jacques Villeneuve is just making the
last turn on the last lap. 'I'm going to stick my neck out here and say that
Jacques Villeneuve is going to keep the Ferrari of Michael Schumacher behind him
and win his first GP....'

A popular one from the BTCC round supporting the 1993 British GP, reported by
Mark Iliff:
"And the car upside down is a Toyota" [PF: At the time, Toyota were using the
slogan "The car in front is a Toyota"; in this race, both works Toyotas took
each other out�]

Tom Hickey adds the following classic about the Hungarian GP� (is there
something about that little goat-track that inspires Murray to new heights?)
"It has all come alive in Hungary. There is the proof! Williams! Benetton!
Ferrari! The Benetton is Berger and the Ferrari is Damon Hill!"

Ritchie Swann has collected the following:

"And Damon Hill is going under the drier part of the Monaco circuit, that's of
course because it's got a roof"
"And that just shows you how important the car is in Formula One racing"
"I know it's an old cliche, but you can cut the atmosphere with a cricket stump"

"And Olivier Panis justifiably wins such a well deserved Grand Prix" (in which
Hill, Schumacker, Alessi, Berger and Villeneuve all came off and only 4 out of
20 drivers finished) [PF: I beg to differ. I was there, Panis drove mightily all
weekend, and was extremely quick in the wet. Admittedly, the guy who most
deserved to win was Frentzen, but�]
"People ask me who's going to be the next Hill, the next Schumacher, and I keep
saying to watch out for Mika Salo" (Salo crashes a few laps later)
(Schumacher is coming out the pit lane ahead of Villeneuve) "And Schumacher
overtakes Villeneuve. Oh, no he doesn't! Oh, yes he does!"
"Stop! Stop! Look! Look! It's a Williams, and I'm guessing that's Jacques
Villeneuve, I can't tell you for sure because I can't see from here. And so
Villeneuve retires .... it's Hill! Damon Hill is out of the Monza Grand Prix!"
and of course the all time classic
"They're now on lap 68, which means there's one, two, three, four, five laps to
go before the end of the Hungarian Grand Prix" (hey, kids, learn to count with
Murray.....)

Henry Malt keeps close track of pit-stops:
My personal favourite is from a British GP, describing a pit stop. "And he's
done that in a whisker under 10 seconds, call it 9.7 in round figures".

C A Hayton:
"And the brilliant Williams duo of Graham Hill and Gilles Villeneuve are turning
this into a magnificent race"

David Thorne's been counting laps:
"Into lap 53, the penultimate last lap but one"

The Emu (surely not that one) adds:
"Nigel Mansell is the last person in the race apart from the five in front of
him."
(Suzuka, 1996, talking about when he was hit by a wheel) "It hit me, and I felt
it."

Andrew Laird
Nelson Piquet pulled into the pits for a a tyre change in his Brabham, and
Murray says: "I'll stop my startwatch"

James Chapman:
"And Damon Hill is six.....1!2!3!4!5!6! seconds ahead!", "Schumacher started
22nd- he's gone past 21!20!19!18!17!",
"And Hill congratulates Schumacher. They're not bosom buddies, but they're not
far off!" (Hill was actually critising Schumacher for heavy-handed driving
tactics after the 1995 Belgian GP).

Mark Hewitt gets ontological:
"There goes Panis in the Prost. For years we knew them as Ligiers, because that
is what they were called."

O D Griffiths:
And I usually say that if anything is going to go wrong with the car, it has
done by now, but I'm not going to say that about Jacques Villeneuve.... Oh, I
already have. (Brazil 1997)

Simon Tyers:
'And Michael Schumacher is in the pits!' (he was out by then,although he was
probably in the garage or somthing.)

A J Waite on Murray's explanation of rally scoring:
"Rally points scoring is 20 for the fastest, 18 for the second fastest, right
down to 6 points for the slowest fastest."

Kevin Brownless:
Murray: There's a car coming into the pits now, they're so unreliable with all
those electronics on board.
James: Actually, Murray, one of his wheels has just fallen off!

Karen Hyland:
1986 Australian Grand Prix: And OFF SPINS PIQUET - Wowee!
And LOOK AT THAT ... out ... that ... and colossal ... it.. that's Mansell ...
that is NIGEL MANSELL (Nigel Mansell's infamous tyre blowout)
Spin, spin, spin - round, round, round he goes (Senna completing a 900 (!)
degree spin at the approach to the Hairpin onto Pit Straight)
The backwards-facing camera from Martin Brundle's car saw the McLaren bearing
down on it like Jaws... (Senna running into the back of Brundle's Brabham)

Rachel:
This referring to Rubens Barichello's pit stop time: "I didn't see the time,
largely because there wasn't one."
"The two Britons running in second and third, Irvine and
Fisichel...Herb...er...oh..."
"And remember that Jacques Villeneuve is a SICK man." Referring to Jacques'
illness during the race.

Robert Chafer:
'and thats one of the mechanics using a feeler guage to measure the depth of
tread in the slick'.

Rhian Morris:
"and this is ralf schumacher the youngest driver in f1 at only 21 yearS old, and
of course he is the son of twice world champion Michael!" (PF: Any rumours that
Gina Maria Schumacher already has an F3000 drive are entirely false, of course!)

Tod Condliffe:
Monza 96. Remember those stupid tyre stacks on the kerbs which got scattered
around the track on the first lap? Camera cuts to single tyre in the middle of
the track. Murray:" And look at that tyre! Someone had better go and get that
quickly. (As if on cue, marshall runs out and grabs it) WELL DONE LAD!!!!!"
Qualifying Imola 97 "Heinz-Harald Frentzen. The man with all the luck, and it's
all bad." (admittedly this only happened last weekend so chances are it wouldn't
appear in the web site, but still a good one, don't you think?)

Michael Padreny:
Murray: Eddie Irvine is in the pit lane.
Camera flashes to an empty Ferrari pit with mechanics milling about. Martin: "I
think he ... ahh ... didn't come in."
A little later when it was obvious (to Murray) that Eddie didn't come in. "We
all make mistakes, and I certainly made a whopper there."
Near the end. "He (Jackie Stewart) will not produce a winner, but if he can
produce second, it will be the next best thing."

Bruce Kennewell:
"...and if you look back 4 seconds...no, 31 seconds...!" (Murray Walker invents
Time Travel, Imola, 27th. April 1997)

Richard Tinker:
"And Panis is almost literally laughing his head of in that car."

George:
(This occurred when Eddie Irvine was give a 10 second penalty for blocking in
the Spanish GP)
Murray : FERRARI OUT !!! (of the race) Thats Eddie Irvine ! !
Martin : That's Eddie Irvine taking his 10 second penalty there.
(this occured just AFTER Coulthard had attempted to pass M. Schumacher and
failed)
Murray : And Coulthard is now on the inside, AND HE'S GOING THROUGH!!! (add
appropriate excitement)
Martin : That's a replay, Murray.
Murray : .... while I tell you the retirements are Barrichello, Mika Salo,
NAKANO, Damon Hill and SHINJI NAKANO. (He somehow excluded R. Schumacher and
Katayama who had also retired at this stage.) #

Richard Gunn:
"If I was Michael Schumacher.... which of course I am not..."

T Windeyer
"And the track temperature has in fact risen in degrees!"

Simon Baker reports on Murray discussing Damon Hill with Clive James:
"Well he's world champion, and we only get one of those a year."

Matthew Butchers provides us with some evidence of Murray's experience of
one-make racing:
"And the first three cars are all Escorts, which isn't surprising as this is\ an
all Escort race"

Alan Moseley gets ontological:
"I should imagine that the conditions in the cockpit are unimaginable!"

Dana and Ian Minter heard Murray peering deep into his crystal ball:
"And will Jacques Villeneuve be racing with Williams next year? Well, we will
only know that in the future."

Don Lutes finds evidence of a commitment to internationalism:
The camera was with Hakkinen for awhile and Murray was talking about him. Then
it switched to Coulthard who of course was leading. Then Murray starts talking
about "the flying Finn in front from Scotland"...

Barnaby Burman discovers some strange family ties:
"We're watching Ralf Schumacher... son, of course of double world champion
Michael Schumacher..... er, the brother of Michael Schumacher...."

Jason Stead finds another Monaco error:
"And I can now tell you that Eddie Irvine is in the pit lane! " (Actually,
Irvine drove straight past the entrance yo the pit lane and into his next
lap...)

Mark Oliver discovers supersonic flight:
1996 British Grand Prix: "And there go the Red Arrows, they'll be back home in
Lincolnshire in just four minutes " Five minutes later the Arrows fly over my
house and into RAF Brize Norton - 40 miles south of Silverstone!

Ben Swabe found one of the few pleasurable moments in the rather grim '97
Canadian GP. Is Murray the Son of God?
"And that piece of water on the right is not the St. Lawrence Seaway, it is the
olympic rowing strip which I have walked down."

Gideon Moore tells us about time:
"Barrichello, when asked yesterday how he thought he would go tomorrow, which is
now today..."

Brian Kelty prepares for war:
"A battle is developing between them...I say developing because it's not yet
on."

Christine Hood:
"Hello...hello...three wheels, three wheels on my wagon... but.... OH!!!!.....
it's Nakano..." (Murray speaking as if it's a perfectly natural sight to see
Shinji Nakano driving along with only 3 wheels)

Shanika collected several good quotes at the British GP:
On Martin's apparent offer to drive for some team:
Martin: "Really Murray, I couldn't bear to lose you. I'd miss you too much!"
Murray: "Flattery will get you everywhere!"
After Vil's horror pit stop: "If looks could kill then everyone in the Williams
pit would drop dead! Because Patrick Head has a face like thunder!"
"Well, that's not bad team work, that's not bad drill, that's not bad
organisation, it's just BAD LUCK!! And that is something you don't expect to
happen!"
On the order: "Ferrari leads, McLaren second, McLaren second, Jordan third and
Benneton Fifth and sixth." (Hey, I thought he could count!)
On Ferrari pit stops: "And the Ferrari team are getting ready to bring in
Schumacher or is it Irvine? Well, it could be either. I suspect that its going
to be Irvine because he clearly cannot do anything about Ralf Schumacher in
front of him. He might as well come in and change his tyres and wheels and hope
that in effect he will have a quicker pit stop than Schumacher has when he comes
in and pass him in the pits to gain a place and move up in the points. But we
will see." Martin: "Look! Its Schumacher coming in!"

M. Iliff on the nature of free will:
"Schumacher wouldn't have let him past voluntarily. Of course he did it
voluntarily, but he had to do it"

Marc Rasker's careful observation of Murray's BTCC commentary:
"And here is Gabriele Tarquini in 3rd place who has already driven for 31
Formula One Grand Prix teams.... Ahum.... i don't know if we've have that many
but i'm sure that if we did so Gabriele didn't drive for all of them!!!"

Steve Corry proving that qualifying is a finer art than we may previously have
suspected:
"....and Berger finishes his flying lap to begin a quick one..."

Michael Hingston watches Muddly Talker take leave of his senses:
"I can't believe what's happening visually, in front of my eyes".

Shanika again:
Murray: How do they do that, Martin? How does a man talk calmly and especially
to his team boss, when Damon in the situation he's in?
Martin: Well, you press a little button on the steering wheel and start
talking, Murray. There's a little speaker in the front of your crash helmet..."

Roger Smyth managed to stay awake during the longueurs of the war of attrition
that was qualifying in Austria:
Murray - "First man out is Marques in the Arrows. Of course he's going out early
to generate some media interest"
Martin - "I'm sure he would generate some interest if he went out in the Arrows
because Marques drives for Minardi"

Roger Wesson:
"Well, now, Villeneuve is now twelve seconds ahead of Villeneuve"

Mike Kear illustrates Murray's shaky grip on Antipodean geography:
"The European drivers have adapted to this circuit extremely quickly,
especially Paul Radisich who's a New Zealander"

Jason King:
(MW was discussing Nigel Mansell's way of keeping calm in the car -- reciting
nursery rhymes over the radio...):
"The thought of, um... er Nigel, twinkle twinkle little star, makes the mind
boggle."

Tim Morson with an oldie from Louise Aitken-Walker's BTCC days with Vauxhall:
During a BTCC race at Silverstone a few years ago, Louise Aitken-Walker and
James Weaver were dicing for a midfield place, when Wheaver, in the BMW,
unfortunatly miss timed his overtaking manouver on the exit of Woodcote corner
taking the both of them out of the race. An extremely upset Aitken-Walker
stomped over to Weaver's BMW and told him in no uncertain terms exactly what she
though of his passing skills. To which Murray commented, "Hell hath no fury like
a Woman being rammed!".

Karl Greenow opening secret orders from Maranello:
"I've no idea what Eddie Irvine's orders are, but he's following them
superlatively well."

Bruce Leyden was observing Japan closely:
After Irvine had shot off the front of the pack: "And here comes Irvine, way
ahead of the rest, now crossing the road... start line, even..."
A rather frequent (but nonetheless funny every time I hear it) Walkerism came
when Murray was doing one of his classic "Team Tactic Analysis" things... "If I
was Michael Schumacher - and I'm not..."
When Hill held up Schumacher..." 'Out of my way, Damon!' says Schumie 'Come
on... Out of my way...' Finally, the current World Champion lets the World
Champion through."
And, back when Irvine did his 'scalded cat' thing at the start:
"Andandandandandand! And look at Irvine!!!!!"

Joe G on Japan '97 -- a race that really did seem to provoke Murray into some
truly special statements:
"I don't know my Madrids from my Jerez" (to which Brundle was heard to chuckle
'shall I cancel my hotel in Madrid then?')
"David Coulthard's engine sounds more like a Zeppelin than a Mercedes"

Rich Wood notes some optimism about Stewart-Ford:
"Stewart have two cars in the top five - Magnusson 5th and Barichello 6th" --
Nurburgring '97

Adam Soffer:
"Frentzen is taking, er..., reducing that gap between himself and Frentzen."

Mike Penn from the Haynes Museum
Hi Im Mike Penn curator of the Haynes Motor Museum. Murray opened a new
extension to our museum a couple of years ago and in his speech he said that he
had often passed the museum and it was a real pleasure to be here at Sparkbrook
opening a new hall. The museum is of course at Sparkford not Sparkbrook but it
was a wonderfully typical Walkerism.
[PF: The cars are nicer in Sparkford, but you can't get a Balti there :)]

Reported by almost everyone:
"There are a lot of IFs in Formula One, in fact IF is Formula One backwards!"