Mary Had A Bicycle
Don Music's version of "Mary Had A Little Lamb"
as written and performed by Don Music (Richard Hunt)
with help from Kermit the Frog (Jim Henson)
and The Monotones (Christopher Cerf, Richard Hunt and Jeff Moss)
NOTE: The Ludwig Don refers to is Ludwig van Beethoven
Don: (playing his piano, while Kermit enters)
Mary had a little lamb, it's fleece was white as snow
And everywhere that Mary went, Mary went, Mary went
And everywhere that Mary went the lamb was sure to ... uh ... to ... um, um ... to ...
Oh, I'll never get it! Oh, I'm sorry, Ludwig! Oh!
(bangs head on the piano, and sobs)
Kermit: Uh, excuse me. Uh, pardon me, uh, Don. Mr. Music. Uh, excuse me, uh, Don.
(Don lifts his head off his piano)
Uh, listen, I'm Kermit the Frog of Sesame Street News. What, what seems to be the trouble?
Don: Well, it's my new song. I ... I can't find a word to rhyme with snow!
I must have a lyric that sounds like snow. Something that lambs do that sounds like snow.
Kermit: A rhyme for snow. Well, listen, I'm good at rhymes. I do a rhyme all the time. You hear that? I did a rhyme just then.
Don: Well, that's very nice.
Kermit: But you want one to, um, but you want one that lambs do.
Don: Right. I'll never get it! Never! Oh!
(bangs his head onto the piano again)
Kermit: Uh, you'll hurt yourself in the head there, uh Don. Uh, tell me. Uh, Don, you okay?
Don: Hmm?
Kermit: What do little lambs do anyhow?
Don: Well, um, well, um, they got baa and uh, they run around a lot.
That's it, they run all the time, they run, run, run, run.
Kermit: Run, run, that's it.
Don: Run?
Kermit: Yes, that's a good one. Get this.
(Don begins to play piano)
Mary had a little lamb, it's fleece was white as snow
And everywhere that Mary went, the lamb was sure to run.
Don: But that doesn't rhyme with snow! It must sound like snow!
Kermit: Well, it doesn't have to sound like snow.
Don: Of course it does!
Kermit: No it doesn't!
Don: Oh!
Kermit: Okay. Listen, we can change that part.
Don: We can?
Kermit: Sure, sure. Change it around. Uh, get this.
(Don begins to play piano)
Mary had a little lamb, it's fleece was yellow as the sun
And everywhere that Mary went, the lamb was sure to run.
Don: No, I don't think that will work. Lambs aren't yellow. I mean, who ever heard of a yellow lamb!?
Kermit: Well, I've heard of a yellow lamb.
Don: You have?
Kermit: Well, not many but well, what else is yellow? Something else is yellow.
Don: Well, I don't know. Canaries are yellow.
Kermit: Canaries! Ya got it.
Don: That's it?
Kermit: Sure.
Don: Oh.
Kermit: Ready?
(Don begins playing the piano)
Mary had a little canary, it was yellow as the sun
And everywhere that Mary went, the canary was sure to run.
Don: No, that won't work. Canaries don't run, they fly mostly, I think, uh.
Kermit: True, true, true. You got a point. We can correct that. Here we go.
Don: How!? How are we going to correct that!?
Kermit: Get ready. Here it comes.
(Don begins to play the piano again)
Mary had a little canary, it was bluer than the sky
And everywhere that Mary went, the canary was sure to fly.
Don: But canaries aren't blue!!!
Kermit: Eeergghhh!!! Well, um, um ...
Don: I'll never get it! Never, you won't help! Oh!
(bangs head on piano again)
Kermit: What happened? Hey, Don, are you okay?
Don: Oh! Oh! Oh!
Kermit: Wait a minute, I got the answer. Hey, Don.
Don: Yes?
Kermit: Give ... give Mary a bicycle. All you have to do is give Mary a bicycle.
Don: A bicycle?
Kermit: Sure, a bicycle can be any color you want it to be.
Don: Say, I like that. Yeah, I like, let me write that down.
(writes using a pencil on a piece of paper on top of the piano)
Kermit: What ... what color do you want the bicycle to be, Don?
Don: Uh, color. Uh ... red. Yes, that's it red. I like red for bicycles.
Kermit: Okay, okay, okay. Get this.
Don: Hold on.
Kermit: Here we go.
(Don begins to play his piano)
Mary had a little bicycle, it was painted red as fire
And whenever Mary wanted to take a ride, the bicycle had a flat tire.
Don: I like it. I like it!!! Oh, that's great! You got a great talent for writing songs!
Kermit: I do? Yeah?
Don: This could be my biggest hit.
Kermit: Wonderful!
Don: Would you like to hear it?
Kermit: Certainly. It would be an honor.
Don: Fine!
Kermit: Uh, ladies and gentleman. Live and in person, here is Don Music doing his hit new song.
(Don plays his piano, and while he's playing, the pencil he was holding falls off his hand and onto the piano and to the floor)
Don: Mary had a bicycle, bicycle, bicycle
Mary had a bicycle
It was painted red as fire!
(The Monotones come through a door and they begin to sing)
The Monotones: Mary, Mary!
Don: And whenever Mary wanted a ride
The Monotones: What?
Don: That's right, wanted a ride
The Monotones: Oh
Don: She wanted a ride, whenever she wanted a ride
The bicycle had a flat tire
The Monotones: Mary, Mary
Don: Red, red, red as fire!
Don and The Monotones: Flat, flat, flat, flat, flat tire! Mary had a bicycle!
Don: But it always had a flat tire
The Monotones: Mary, Mary, flat tire!
Originally transcribed by Jennifer English, filled in admirably by CookieCountDawn
Available on the video
Sing Yourself Silly also available on DVD