The Count Counts Five

skit with The Count Von Count (Jerry Nelson), of course
and Ernie (Jim Henson)

(The Count's scary organ music plays and we see The Count's castle inside.
There are bats flying and spider webs everywhere, a blue curtain, a stairway, and a telephone on top of a table.
We narrow onto a door that creaks and see The Count and Ernie coming in.
Now we hear a howl of a wolf.)

Ernie: Ooh. Gee, it's, uh, it's very nice of you to give me a job helping you, Count.
Uh, what would you like me to do?

The Count: I want you to answer my telephone so I don't have to be bothered while I look for things to count!

Ernie: Answer the telephone, huh? Is that all?

The Count: That's enough. It's not as easy as it seems.

Ernie: Not easy, huh? Well, listen, you can count on me, Count.

The Count: Hmm. (shakes head)

Ernie: (Ernie laugh)

The Count: Now, what can I find to count. I mu ...

(telephone rings, he gasps)

One, one ring! Ah, ah, ah!

Ernie: That's the telephone. I'll answer it.

The Count: No! I must count them!

Ernie: Yeah, but ...

The Count: (telephone rings again) Two, two rings!

Ernie: I have to answer the phone there.

The Count: No, no, I am counting the rings!

(telephone rings again)

Three, three rings!

Ernie: I'll get it!

The Count: Oh, you tricky Ernie!

(telephone rings again)

Four, four! Four rings!

Ernie: But I have to answer the ...

The Count: No! I.. (Telephone rings again) Five! No!

Ernie: (picks up phone) Hello? Hello?

The Count: Five glorious rings! Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah!

(Lightning and thunder)

Ernie: Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Ooh. They hung up.

The Count: Of course. You took so long to answer!

Ernie: But you wouldn't let me answer it.

The Count: I told you. It wouldn't be easy.

(telephone rings again, Ernie gets startled)

Ah, they're calling back!

Ernie: I'll get it!

The Count: One, one ring!

Ernie: I'll get it!

The Count: No, I'm counting! (telephone rings again) Two, two rings!

Transcribed by CookieCountDawn

available on the video

Learning About Numbers

Learning About Numbers (1986)