Everything I Need to Know About Life I Learned from
WKRP in Cincinnati

1. No matter what people say, turkeys DON’T fly.

2. Remember, my children, there is no understanding, only love

3. Death before disco

4. You’re not a real newsman until you’ve won the Buck-Eyed Newshawk Award

5. Don’t take dictation, don’t get coffee, and don’t go out with Herb Tarlek

6. When you’re mad, shove your fist into the wall

7. You can’t sell time to a sober client

8. Consistancy is very important in life. That’s why Herb’s always a jerk

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