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Disclaimer:I Don't own Buffy or Angel or any other characters I mentioned in this humble story. I am merely borrowing them while bowing down at the feet of Joss, the WB, and all the other hot shot buisnesses that lay claim to this wonderful show.

Rating: PG

Time Frame: The ened of Becoming

Summary: The last scene with Buffy and Angel from Angels POV(Oh,yoo knew it was coming sooner or later)

Authors Notes: Thanks to Kelly and LadyRHood(my beta reader) for all the inspiration, and also to all my friends who teased me about crying too much over this last episode. This is my attempt to stop my grief. I also working on an alternate ending for Becoming. I am sorry, but I can't let Angel go. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I feel like I have been slammed into a wall. My head jerks up and my eyes burn, unseeing. A gasp is ripped from my throat. The pain subsides, b not the buzzing in my head as I wipe away the tear in my eyes. I look down fo a while to get my view in focus and then I look up. My gaze falls immediatly on her.

"Buffy" I whisper in a confused joy.

Then I notice the raised sword in her hands. It looks as if she is about to strike at me. My head whirls, and I know that something happened that I can not remember.

"What's going on?" I wonder out loud.

I see my confusion in her eyes as I push myself to my feet. I gaze into her eyes and see hardness,coldness. But, beneath the harness and pain I can see a glimmer of hope and recognition that seems almost afraid to peek out. I struggle to remember but all I can see is a alley, dark , and wet. My gaze sweeps the room I am now in and it does not take me long to realize I am no longer in that alley.

"Where are we?" I ask.

I am a mountain of questions. Poor Buffy, she must be as confused as I am. She just keeps staring at me. Like a little child who has been offered a piece of candy but is afraid that it will be pulled away from her grasp. Slowly she lowers the sword. I try to tell her. To explain my questions.

"I don't remeber."

I catch the scent of blood. It is not my own. My eyes are drawn to her arm. My teeth clench as I spy the wicked cut on her arm. I say silently to myself. But instead of voicing this to her, I draw her close to me.

"Oh God Buffy, I feel like I haven't seen you in months." I hear myself say.

I can hear her draw a breath and let herself fall into my embrace. She nuzzled at my neck with not only love and affection, but also with need. That need suprised me . . Maybe this feeling of mine isn't my imagination. The voices of doubt bite at my mind, but I push them back for now.

"Everything's so muddled, I..."

I break of to kiss her neck. It doesn't matter. We are together I hold her closer to me. Then, I feel her body tense. Even more confused, I pull her back to look at her, and what I see in her eyes makes me feel faint. God, I have never seen eyes so sad. I wanted to make that sadness go away. I wanted Buffy to shine and lauph like she had before. I wanted her to be happy. Why wasn't she?

"What's going on?"

"Don't worry about it" she whispers, and pulls my head down to her lips.

I savor the kiss. Her love washes over me. The sweetness of the kiss almost too much to bear. I feel her hands running through my hair and I pull her in close. Slowly, she pulls away but lingers near my face.

"I love you". she says softly, her voice quivering with sadness.

I love you" I say and I mean it. I will give anything for her. I will always protect her.

"Close your eyes" she whispers against my lips.

Confused I do as I am yold. I'd do anything for her. I feel her lips brush mine then she pulls back. Then a searing pain lanced through my body. My eyes flew open as I gasped in pain. Total pain. I looked to see the sword which a moment ago had been in Buffy's hand, was now in my stomach. My hand outstretched, I whisper the name of my love one last time.

"Buffy" With that one breath, I forgive her. I don't care that she did it. I know her reason's must have been sound and just. But, even as I know I am dying, I want her to be happy. I want her to know I for give her. I see patients in her eyes. I didn't know how her eyes could get sadder. She looked at me in horror, as if she could not believe what she had done. But, I knew that she still loved me, and I took that love into oblivion. *** But it did not end there. In my seeming conciousness, I see light ahead of me. Unquestioning, I walk into it, leaving hell and my demon behind and now I wait. For her, for love.