Disclaimer time once again!  Twenty-seventh verse same as the 
first . . everybody *sing*:

I don't own these characters, (chorus) Paramount does!
I don't own this venue, (chorus) Paramount does!
I am making no money off of this, (chorus) Paramount does not 
either!

This story involves sex between two men, aka: slash.  If that is 
*not* your cup of tea, sweet as it is, then don't read it!  (simple, 
ain't it??) Feedback is *very* much appreciated, and always 
answered.  Flames will be passed around to friends and 
chuckled over.  :)

This is the sequel to 'Adversaries', 'Allies', 'Acknowledgement', 
'Argument', 'Advantage', and 'Attrition'.  <whew>

'Awakened' by Amirin


*****************************************************


"B'Elanna, it's Tom's program, and I am not changing a damned 
thing without his approval, okay?" Harry asked, getting tired of 
the discussion, as they headed to Tom's quarters.  Tom 
probably wouldn't mind having a card room, and a staircase to 
get to it, added to his Sandrine's program.  Just because it 
*didn't* have a second floor, didn't mean it *couldn't* have a 
second floor. B'Elanna wanted a poker parlor and she and Harry 
could program a perfectly good one, but they really should ask 
Tom first.  Harry knew that B'Elanna didn't want to have much to 
do with Tom, since his breakup with Chakotay.  It didn't seem to 
matter that it was a mutual decision to end their relationship, 
Chakotay was still hurting, and B'Elanna was still upset on his 
behalf.  Hopefully, he and Tom could salvage something out of 
it; they'd gotten along well as soon as they'd learned *how* to.

Even though it had been a few weeks, Tom still remained 
distant, not wanting to get into something else right away while 
needing to get over the guilt he still felt about Chakotay.  Harry 
was hopeful that eventually Tom would initiate something with 
him but sometimes it made him feel like a casket-chaser. 

He wasn't about to let someone steal Tom's heart again, right 
from under his nose, even though he was reasonably certain 
that if Tom wanted to begin a new relationship, it would be with 
him. So, he made himself available whenever Tom wanted 
someone to talk to, even if the man didn't feel like talking, much. 
Not many people were allowed to get too close and Harry knew 
that a few had noticed how proprietary he was where his friend 
was concerned.  Tom either didn't notice, or didn't care, that 
Harry was keeping him from almost everybody else.  Chakotay 
was a well-liked and respected man and some weren't willing to 
believe that the end of their relationship had been agreed to by 
both of them.  A few blamed Tom, others blamed Harry, but it 
really couldn't be helped. Harry was perfectly willing to run 
interference until the heat died down.

He and Tom were closer than ever, now, and almost all of their 
off-duty time was spent together.  Harry loved it and was 
delighted that Tom seemed to be happier about it, too.  He 
hadn't realized how much Chakotay was keeping them apart, 
until the man was no longer an issue.

Reaching Tom's quarters now, he didn't see the significant look 
on B'Elanna's face when he keyed in Tom's access code and 
walked in without waiting for permission.  They headed into the 
living area, but no Tom. Harry was about to recheck the 
computer when he heard the mumbling sounds coming from the 
bedroom.  He froze for just a moment until he realized the only 
voice he heard was Tom's and cautiously went into the 
bedroom.  Tom was apparently asleep, though restless, 
speaking incoherently, and thrashing around on the bed every 
few seconds.  It didn't seem to be a nightmare, just incredibly 
active sleep, or Harry would've woken him immediately.

Harry walked over to the bed, trying valiantly to ignore the fact 
that the man obviously wasn't sleeping in anything, and sat 
down next to Tom's hip, putting a hand on his bare shoulder to 
carefully rouse him.  B'Elanna watched, bemusedly, as Tom 
rolled over, grabbed Harry by the shirtfront, and pulled him into 
bed next to him, before moving on top of him, pinning the Ensign 
to the mattress.  She determinedly headed over, but Harry 
warned her off.

"B'Elanna, wait, he doesn't know what he's doing; he's still 
asleep," Harry said with quiet incredulity, barely finishing the 
sentence, before Tom's lips came down on his, effectively 
silencing him. Oh, the time he'd spent fantasizing about this was 
wasted, the reality was unbelievable.  This beat the hell out of 
that stolen kiss all those weeks ago, when he'd been pretending 
to be too asleep to enjoy it.

He stopped himself just before responding passionately to those 
warm, wonderful lips, when he heard a throat clear.  Damn. 
B'Elanna.  He looked over at her, turning his head, as Tom's 
mouth fastened onto his neck, nearly wringing a groan of need 
and want out of him, before the man quieted, head resting 
against Harry's throat.

"Shall I leave you two alone?" B'Elanna asked, her voice a little 
harsh, though amused.  If Harry hadn't looked so shocked, she 
really would have been pissed.  But, it was obvious that this had 
never happened before, in spite of rumors to the contrary, so 
she was able to see the humor in the situation.  

She sighed impatiently, as she watched Harry try to get out from 
under Tom's weight.  Raising an eyebrow, she had to admit to a 
certain . . . appreciation of the form visible under the thin sheet. 
The man had a *nice* body.  She shook herself in annoyance 
and came to the bed to physically remove Tom from Harry, 
when Harry stopped her, once again.

"Don't, B'Elanna, I don't want to shock him into waking up. 
Look, let me handle it.  He'll be mortified enough, it'll be even 
*worse* if he knew you were here. You go ahead, I'll ask him 
about the program and we'll talk tomorrow, okay?" he asked 
softly, trying not to let his impatience show. He *really* wanted 
her out of there, and not just for Tom's sake, either.  

He could feel the evidence of the man's arousal against his thigh 
and even though Tom wasn't moving at the moment, he was 
also still asleep and would probably start moving again soon. 
Which would make *Harry's* arousal even more apparent and 
he didn't want B'Elanna to know.  He didn't think he could deal 
with that, not yet.

B'Elanna nodded curtly.  She could trust Harry to extricate 
himself from this, without humiliating Paris any more than 
necessary.  She couldn't help wondering who the hell the man 
was dreaming about, though.  If it was Chakotay, then *why* had 
the two of them broken up?

"Fine, Harry," she sighed, turning to head out of the room.  "I'll 
see you tomorrow," and with that, she left the room, heading to 
Sandrine's.  Maybe she could show Paris what she had in mind 
a little better, if she just worked on it some, to give him more of 
an idea of what she wanted. Humming, she made her way to the 
holodeck, content to spend a couple of hours there, before going 
to sleep, herself.

Harry breathed a heavy sigh of relief, as soon as B'Elanna left, 
then quietly called for a privacy lock, in case she changed her 
mind.  Tom reacted to the sound of Harry's voice, and started 
nuzzling his friend's neck, teeth nipping lightly at his earlobe. 
Harry moaned softly, calling himself every lousy thing he could 
think of.  He didn't intend to wake Tom up, not just yet.  It wasn't 
fair, it wasn't right, and he couldn't bring himself to worry about it 
too much. Tom would awaken, eventually, and Harry would 
laugh it off, put him at ease, then go to his own lonely bed and 
dream about the two of them, together.  That was the way it had 
to be, until Tom was ready.  No matter how long it took.

Harry kicked his shoes off the bed and moaned as his 
movement made Tom start again.  His shirt rapidly disappeared, 
followed by his slacks and underwear.  He bent his leg to get a 
sock off and Tom's face turned toward his thigh.  A hot tongue 
began trailing from his knee to his groin as Tom slowly slithered 
down his body, pausing directly over the rigid length of his cock. 
Harry damned near bit through his lip when Tom kissed him, 
lips brushing over him like warm velvet, covering his shaft from 
root to head. A gentle finger exploring the entrance to his body 
made Harry move quickly to open the drawer on the stand, 
hoping Tom had . . yes.  

Harry sighed in relief as his fingers closed around the tube, 
before popping it open and drenching Tom's hand with cold gel 
which quickly warmed now that it was exposed to the air.  He 
covered Tom's cock as well, smiling at the shudder and the 
sleepily murmured "Gods, *yes*," the action elicited.  A hand on 
his hip rolled him over onto his stomach and he came up onto 
hands and knees, too far gone to even remotely consider the 
consequences as another finger skidded over his prostate, to be 
joined by a second, then a third, in rapid succession.  He shook 
helplessly as he felt the blunt head of Tom's cock rest against 
the opening of the now slick channel and tried to muffle the 
desperate scream of a need finally being fulfilled as Tom slowly 
entered him.  Harry's soft sigh of joining in his dream jarred with 
the scream of the reality and brought Tom into groggy 
wakefulness.

"Oh, gods, *Harry*?" Tom couldn't believe it.  Maybe he was still 
asleep, dreaming.  There was no way Harry was actually in his 
bed, naked, under him, letting him . . oh, *gods*.

"If you stop now, I *will* hurt you, I swear it!" Harry stated 
emphatically, tossing his hair out of his eyes, trying not to care 
that his best friend probably wasn't anymore.  He felt Tom try to 
withdraw and surged backward into him, wringing a groan from 
both of them as the man found himself once more buried deep 
within the beautiful body of his best friend. 

Tom wasn't so unaware that he didn't realize instantly how easily 
he moved inside Harry and thanked every deity he'd ever heard 
of that he'd had the presence of mind to make this as easy as 
possible for his former best friend. The pain of admitting that he 
and Harry probably weren't friends any longer was burned out of 
him the second Harry moaned and moved back into him. 

"Touch me," Harry groaned, then gasped as Tom's slick hand 
enclosed his own hardness.  "Oh, gods, *yes*."

Tom didn't need to stroke Harry more than a few times before 
the man was coming, his thick seed scalding Tom's hand as he 
cried out.  The muscle spasms which echoed throughout Harry's 
body were too much for Tom and he followed rapidly, climaxing 
with a shout of grief-tinged fulfillment.

Harry fell heavily onto the bed, Tom right on top of him. Tom 
tried to move off and away and almost succeeded, before Harry 
coiled warmly around him, coming to rest against his shivering 
body.

Tom couldn't stop shaking anymore than he could believe that 
Harry was still there, that he hadn't vanished like smoke, as he 
came down hard from the high of his orgasm.  He was afraid to 
touch the man, afraid to talk to him. Gods, what had he *done*? 
And how could he have done this to his best friend, even in his 
sleep?  Yet, here was Harry, lying on his shoulder, arms 
wrapped around him, no tears, no recriminations, no 
accusations, no hatred, nothing.  He lay still, feeling tears come 
to his own eyes, wondering how many kinds of a monster his 
friend thought him to be, now.  Goddamn it, anyway.  As if his 
record wasn't bad enough, now he got to add 'rapist' to it.  Oh, 
*Harry*.

"Gods, Har," he choked out, cringing as he felt the man stiffen 
against him. "I am so sorry," he couldn't finish, bringing a hand 
up over his eyes, his body shaking as tears coursed down his 
face.

*What*?  Harry looked up, horrified, to see Tom crying silently, 
before the man pulled away from him, leaving him bereft, and 
rolled over, burying his face into the pillow.  

"Why?  What in the world do you have to be *sorry* for?" Harry 
asked in disbelief, not knowing what the hell was going on.  

"I didn't mean it.  I never meant to hurt you," Tom said in a 
choked voice, fingers digging into the sheet under the pillow, 
wishing he could smother himself with it.

"Hurt me? You haven't hurt me," Harry said, puzzled, bringing a 
hand to Tom's back, rubbing slowly, not knowing how to comfort 
the man or absolve him from whatever it was he thought he'd 
done.

"I forced you.  Oh, gods, Harry, I *made* you . ." Tom trailed off 
with a quiet sob, unable to finish, as Harry's hand slowed to a 
stop on his back.  

Tom thought he'd *raped* him? Oh, shit, no . .

"Tom," Harry said softly, then louder when he got no reaction, 
"*Tom*, dammit, look at me. *Look at me*!" he practically yelled, 
forcing his friend to turn back over.  "You did *not* force me! 
How could you *think* that?  Why in the hell would you think 
you'd *have* to?  I *love* you, remember?  You knew that 
*weeks* ago.  Nothing's changed, Tom.  Nothing." He paused, 
seeing Tom quiet down, the tears slack off.  He moved back 
over the man's beautiful, naked body, leaning on his forearms 
on either side of Tom's head, before kissing him, slowly and 
softly.  

Tom was frozen to immobility and Harry pulled away, sighing, 
before bringing his fingers up to firmly, gently, tangle through 
Tom's hair. He placed tender kisses all over the man's face, then 
released his grip on the tousled, golden hair, to caress his 
cheek, brushing the tears away.

"I wanted this," he said softly, looking at Tom, but seeing no 
change in the man's face.  "I see you don't believe me. Fine, I'll 
say it again, louder.  Pay attention.  *I* *wanted* *this*!  Gods, if 
I thought you were up to it, I'd ask you to take me again.  Tom, 
I've wanted . . damn, I've wanted *you*, for *so* long," he 
sighed, bringing his head down onto Tom's shoulder.  

"How do I make you believe me? What can I say?  Hmm?" he 
looked up, meeting astonished blue eyes.  "What can I do?  Tell 
me, and I'll do it. You want to read my logs, the personal ones? 
The ones about my dreams? They're *filled* with you.  Almost 
every damned night for more than a year, now.  And they never 
stopped, even when you were with Chakotay.  I have dreamt of 
this, fantasized about it, hoped for it, wanted it.  You can't force 
the willing, Tom.  And *you* couldn't rape someone, if you tried. 
It's not in you, it just isn't.  Say something, tell me you believe 
me, please, Tom," Harry pleaded quietly.

"Why didn't you tell me *before* I got together with Chakotay?" 
Tom asked quietly, bringing a tentative hand to Harry's bare 
shoulder.  Smooth, warm, strong . . gods, this was *Harry*.

"I was waiting," Harry said and shrugged offhandedly, but Tom 
saw the pain flash in his soft, brown eyes as he continued, "and 
I waited too long. Chakotay somehow got there ahead of me and 
then I *couldn't* say anything. For all I knew, you two were for 
keeps and I wasn't about to jeopardize that, or make you feel 
uncomfortable.  Then *he* figured it out, somehow, and, well, 
you know the rest."

"Oh, damn, Har.  I'm sorry," Tom whispered.

Harry cocked his head at him, curiously.  "For what?  It's not 
*your* fault that I fell for you.  Well, I guess it *is*, I mean, you're 
wonderful.  And . ." he trailed off, feeling Tom quaking below him 
with suppressed laughter.

Tom sobered immediately at the slight glare in Harry's eyes. 
"Oh, Harry. I'm not laughing at *you*.  Never at you.  It's just 
relief that I didn't do anything to lose my best friend, that you 
don't hate my guts.  That's all."

Harry smiled, a little off, but a smile just the same.  "I don't hate 
you. I never have. I never will.  And *I'm* relieved you haven't 
run me out of here at the business end of a phaser.  I took 
advantage of you.  Again. Yes, I did," he protested as Tom 
shook his head, before Harry put a hand over his mouth to keep 
him quiet.

"You were dreaming about who knows who, probably Chakotay, 
and I took advantage . ." he trailed off as Tom removed his hand 
and kissed him, softly.  He moaned, helplessly, heartrate 
skyrocketing as gentle hands threaded through his hair, before 
the man backed off.

"Harry," Tom said huskily, waiting for Harry's eyes to refocus.  "I 
was dreaming about you.  Again.  How you felt, how you tasted. 
How you kissed me, how we loved.  How you sounded when 
you came, how you held me after I did.  It was all you.  Just like 
that dream I had of us the night before Chakotay and I broke 
up."

Harry stared in silent dismay.  "Is it my fault?" he asked quietly, 
wincing inwardly, wondering if Chakotay ever knew.

Tom shook his head.  "No, it's no one's fault. We should have 
remained just friends, Chakotay and I, but loneliness and need 
and curiosity sort of overwhelmed our good judgement.  It wasn't 
you.  It was us, me and him. He told me he was just too 
possessive where I was concerned and it wasn't any good for 
either of us.  He said it was something he'd have to work on, 
before he got involved with anyone else, so it wouldn't happen 
again.  It had nothing to do with you, Harry."

Harry nodded, taking Tom's word for it, before the last few 
minutes impacted on him again, causing him to flush. 

Tom frowned, seeing Harry's color darken.  Now what the hell 
was the man torturing himself with?

"Har, what is it?"

Harry flinched slightly, cursing his best friend's perception.

"Was it too early for you?  I mean all this," he gestured between 
the two of them.  "Is it too soon after Chakotay?  Do we need to 
back things up or is it maybe the beginning . . for us?"  His head 
shot up when he felt Tom chuckling softly.

"Why is it I can't seem to do things the normal way?" Tom 
whined playfully. "I have to turn into a lizard to get together with 
the Captain, deal with Pon Farr with B'Elanna, rush into a 
relationship at warp ten with Chakotay, and seduce you in my 
sleep.  What the hell's the matter with me? And what are you 
laughing at?" he asked the man giggling in his arms.

"I'd hate to see you disrupt a pattern," Harry tried to say 
seriously before snorting again.

"Ohhh, *you*!" Tom said in mock exasperation, flipping them 
over so that Harry was beneath him. They both quieted 
immediately, the arousing sensation of skin on skin turning 
things serious, again.

"It's not too soon," Tom admitted softly, framing Harry's head 
with his arms before kissing him lightly.  "I don't want to wait any 
longer."

Harry sighed, wrapping his hands around Tom's shoulders. 
"Good," he breathed.  "'Cause I can't wait for us to have sex 
when we're both wide awake," he said with amusement.

"Harry," Tom said quietly, nuzzling his lover's neck and smiling 
at the groan he heard before raising his head to meet Harry's 
dark eyes.  "We're both wide awake."

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