As he maddened at the thought, he realized
half of his walk had passed, and through half
of the relationship this thought had been
alive. If he would have had a nice time today
in the secrecy of the forbidden mansion, these
thoughts would have belonged to the other half.
That half made him want to get down on his
knees and kiss the earth for the glory of love
and beauty. He had done that walk yesterday.
It always felt better. But on occasion, and
too often he thought, it would be this walk.
The one with weight in his belly. The one
that wondered if his life and love were just
a fairytale witch may forever dangle out of
his reach, by no fault of his own.
And what of the move? The pressure in
his belly, or maybe his heart, grew and
taunted an explosion. He mustn't think about
it. He would put that harmful, aching thinking
on the shelf for later. Maybe he would forget
it. Probably it would come to visit him
tonight, though. In the dark room, on the warm
sweaty pillow, that's where it would attack.
But for now, no more. Go home, relax, then
come back and meet her. It will be great to
see her again. It's always better when it's
not at her house, although not always good in
public.
Up ahead the alley turned into the street
he was to cross. Down two blocks was the
station. The train station. It was here
Gerald would board the speedy transit from her
side to his side of town. From Camelot to the
Gutter. It was the train that would take him
from this oasis to his rightful place in the
refuge. The train came screaming to a halt.
He looked through the windows. It was too
crowded he decided.
The people huddled together on the train
seemed uneasy. Gerald felt uneasy. It was
true what the socialites thought. This was a
rough train to a desolate destination, and
Gerald himself was scared the way he had
probably scared many people with suits and
kids. He heard the swish of the wheels
preparing to leave again. "All Aboard!" was
yelled from somewhere, and he decided to catch
the next one. They came around every fifteen
minutes or so. He backed away from the train
and leaned up against the wall. He sighed and
sank down. Over towards the main street
entrance he saw the man who worked in the box
office talking to an old man. They were both
holding flowers.