*Sunday April 19th, 1998* Well...it's a day after my birthday...and I'm 19!!!...look out world I can now drink and smoke legally...like it makes a difference...anyway, Shanna and I had a pretty good night last night...other than the fact that I got totally trashed and acted like the gimp I really am...anyone who's seen me like that will vouch for my out-of-orderness...it isnt a pretty sight!!! Other than the fact that I was so fully embarrassed of myself it brought tears to my eyes, the night was good...I love being with Shanna....I wont go into detail though cause my journal isnt just about me anymore...and I don't want to talk about our relationship without her permission.... My parents and I went out for dinner tonight...and I got my present...I finally after years and YEARS of begging for a camera, I got one...a really nice one to boot...I'm so excited!!!...My parents have been really great lately, they paid for my school course, bus pass and Y membership....and gave me $50 two weeks ago...I feel so utterly guilty because I cant say thank you sincerely enough....my family has never been big on words...I don't actually know how to say..."this means so much to me, thank you so very much!"...so like everything else I'll have to write them a letter...I've taught myself to sit people down and deal with things face to face, but I still find it increditably difficult...forcing myself to do it just makes me crazy for a couple days....god it only took me four years to sit Tara down and deal with our "issues"... Speaking of Tara, and I am a little bit over emotional right now so I'm mushy as fuck, has been great the last couple days...everything I ever loved about her has come back to our friendship...I cant explain it...but it's a really good thing! I absolutely love Brian today too...I love everyone....somethings wrong with me, my life is going too well....what's the catch?