:

J. Ewing wrote Sun 7/23/17 @09:08 EDT:

Er – that Edmonson County lawyer – ahem –
was disciplined for being a lousy shot?   Or
something about not having the proper code
enforcement  /  building  permit  paperwork
needed for repair / remodeling of his dwell-
ing?

The disciplined lawyer thanks you for your inter-
est.  It was a "private admonition,"  and he asked
us  to  post  it,  along with his proposed response.
He said he'd like our readers to  weigh  in  on the
propriety of his response.    – Editor

Editorial:

When will women's lib  and the rest of the "politi-
cally correct"  sic the newspapers whose obituary
headlines chronicle a woman's marital history but
not  a  man's? – e.g.,  "Betty Louise Stigall Sellers
Boggs Marlow, 69," in a recent edition of the Lou-
isville Courier-Journal.

betsy.jpg Dumb news from Minneapolis, Minnesota: Mayor (ditz) Besty Hodges, not real clear in the concept (or about anything); Police chief (clueless), Janée Harteau; Shot (dead), Justine Damond; Fiancé, Don Damond; Shooter, Mohammed Noor; So, did Noor shoot the little lady because she was blonde and hot, and he wanted her for himself, or because he was Muslim and could not desire her? Warning: Twin Cities police easily startled (new street signs)

Unisex name of the week:  Marie.

Twenty-one dogs were ordered returned to  an  Evansville
animal sanctuary operator from whom 70 were seized and
who pleaded guilty to animal cruelty,  explaining  that she
had an ill husband to care for also. . . .

A 21-year-old man pleaded guilty to assault and battery in
Columbus for up to 6 years in prison  for hurling chairs in
an earlier court appearance,  one of which hit the prosecu-
tor (and another of which missed the judge). . . .

The eight Clinkenbeard siblings of Freelandville, near Vin-
cennes,  have chalked up 448 years of marriage,  combined
(without divorce reported among any of them). . . .

An 80-year-old man was sentenced to 12 years in prison for
punching a policeman who stopped him  from  approaching
kidnapping survivor Elizabeth Smart with a knife  at a book
signing in Terre Haute. . . .

Archaeologists excavated 17 pioneer graves in Clarksville
to make way for a road being widened. . . .

New rules in Elkhart prohibit food truck parking in angled
and perpendicular spaces.
                                              [courtesy Columbus Republic]

bettyjoc.jpg South Bend's most wanted: Betty Jo Crawford, BF, 5'2", 150 lbs, theft (she's grown some hair and gained 10 pounds since we last saw her); Glenda Nelson, BF, 5'6", 155 lbs, prescription forgery; Alexis Wecht, WF, 5'2", 160 lbs, assisting a criminal; Berrien County, Michigan's: Janelle Helen Tipton, WF, larceny of a credit card; Kristle Raquelle Davis, BF, domestic violence, 3rd off.; Jessica Renée Thomas, BF, domestic violence, 3rd off., assault with a dangerous weapon (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

A Gallatin County School Board member was removed by
a judge for not having a high school diploma.

                                    [courtesy Lexington Herald-Leader]

A  mistrial  was declared in the trial of a former Protestant
pastor for child sex abuse in Louisville.

                                                   [courtesy Courier-Journal]

Johnny Depp, a native of Owensboro, Ky., is a great-grand-
son of Effie Depp, who was a paternal aunt of the late Ken-
tucky Chief Justice John Palmore  (deceased  July 4,  2017,
at age 99).  Let's see (1, 2, 3, minus 2½, divided by 6),  this
means that the Hon. Justice Palmore and Johnny Depp were
first cousins twice removed.  Did we  get  that   right?  This
question will appear on your next IQ test.

                                         [courtesy Barren County Progress]

OB/GYN Amanda Hess delivered a baby to Leah Johnson at
a Frankfort hospital, then minutes later had her own baby. . . .

Children will return to school Tuesday in Frankfort (Wednes-
day in Edmonson County).
                                                                                    [LEX18]

brandart.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Brandi Zeigler, WF, 32, 5'4", 150 lbs, disorderly; Courtney Bailey, WF, 28, 5'2", 120 lbs, not exactly kempt; Arthur Hellebusch [apprehended', WM, 35, 6'0", "featured fugitive of the week," sexual abuse 1st degree (victim under 12) (pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "Gossip?  There's no such thing!  It's news!" – Leonard Simon

Numerical palindromes:      Perhaps you have noticed that      25 and 52 are  numerical  pal-      indromes  in   certain   digital      clock fonts.      Ditto 69 and 96,  but  they  in      almost any font.

     

joterron.jpg Wanted in Waco: Joseph Betros, WM, 31, 5'5", 180 lbs, probation violation, dangerous drugs; Terron Nicole Millsap, WF, 32, 5'5", 155 lbs, probation violation, possession of meth; Michael David Witt, WM, 61, 6'0", 210 lbs, theft from elderly, probation violation (Waco Crime Stoppers)

A man was arrested in Monterey Park, California, for smuggling three
king cobra snakes into the country from Hong Kong, shipped to him in
potato chip canisters (along with three albino Chinese soft-shell turtles
– a search of his home turned up  a baby Morelet's crocodile,  alligator
snapping turtles, a common snapping turtle and five diamond-back ter-
rapins also). . . .A dump truck carrying bread dough in the hot summer
sun oozed its load on I-5 near Tacoma, Washington;  and another truck
spilled 7,500 pounds of  slime  eels  on a highway in Oregon.  . . . Two
brothers wearing Donald Trump masks  were arrested for breaking into
ATM's in Turin, Italy. . . . The  "Fireball"  threw passengers 30 feet into
the air at the  Ohio  State  Fair,  killing an 18-year-old man and injuring
seven  other  riders  (so Governor John Kasich shut down all the merry-
go-rounds  –  and,  isn't the "Fireball" merely an update of what used to
be called the  "Pendulum,"  and what we called the "Egg Beater"?). . . .
Energy secretary Rick Perry took a phone call in which he discussed the
scientific development of making fuel from pig manure  and moonshine
with a caller he thought was the Ukrainian prime minister but turned out
to be Russian pranksters.
                                                                 [courtesy LEX18, MSNBC, AP]

      

marquail.jpg Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas): Christopher E. English, WM, 37, a/k/a Sleep, a/k/a Tommy Boy, 5'9", 210 lbs, tattoos face, head, neck, both arms, both legs, stomach, chest, LSD (or smtg. like it); Marquail Dezon Brown, BM, 25, 6'3", 206 lbs, tattoos both arms, chest, distribution of marijuana, no tax stamp; Roger Michael Rogers, WM, 57, 5'11", 160 lbs, criminal threat (Sedgwick County Sheriff); kaytanja.jpg Texoma's most wanted fugitives of the week, Wanted in Wichita Falls, Texas (not Wichita, Kansas): Kay Lynn Martin, 30, blonde, green eyes, 115 lbs, 5'6", bond revocation, possession of controlled substance pg1 o/1g - u/4g; tanja McGee Green, 42, black hair, brown eyes, 180 lbs, 5'3", violation of probation, theft of property $1,500 with 2 or more previous convictions

I'm planning to travel to another state in September and
trying to save up for the plane ticket.  The  issue  is,  I'll
be gone during my birthday.   I'd like my family to help
me with the cost of the trip instead of buying me gifts.

How do I go about telling them?
                                                                    Little Chippie

(all this week courtesy the Globe except the Jim-
my Carter headline, at the bottom, courtesy the Onion):

Speck Mellencamp, 22, John's son, was arrested for public
intoxication and resisting police in a brawl outside a sand-
wich shop on the edge of the Indiana University campus in
Bloomington that involved also his brother, Hud, 23  (both
were arrested in a previous brawl in 2013). . . .

A woman who had booked a $30,000,  170-guest wedding
dinner at the  Ritz  Charles  in Carmel threw it open to the
homeless when her wedding was called off. . . .

The neighbor who was wounded in an exchange of gunfire
over a back yard fence  in  Greenwood  was charged with a
crime  (there's video).
                                              [courtesy Columbus Republic]

nichdeme.jpg South Bend's most wanted: Nicholas Barnes, WM, 6'1", 160 lbs, theft, habitual traffic offender, possession of meth, possession of marijuana, failure to appear; Sarah Ward, BF, 5'7", 200 lbs, fraud; Demetrius Thomas, BM, 5'8", 185 lbs, probation viol., robbery; Wanted in Berrien County, Michigan: Kimberly Ruth-Ann Molter, WF, larceny in a building; Blake T. Fernwalt, WM, carrying a concealed weapon in a vehicle (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

Kia  Hampton,  who in 2011 became the first black wo-
man named Miss Kentucky USA, was indicted in Allen
County, Ohio, for smuggling marijuana into a prison. . . .

The  Merriam-Webster Dictionary of Law  was  among
gift books barred to state prisoners. . . .

Clifton Machniak, 57, was arrested in Jenkins for lea- ving  his  dog  in a hot car, his second offense in three years.   He  was  cited  for cruelty to animals, posses- sion of marijuana and pos- session of brass knuckles. . . .

Savannah Agee,  23, fell asleep on the so- fa  of  an apartment she  burg- larized in Berea. . . .

A suspected meth user took a dip in  a  kiddie  pool  on  the
front porch of a home in Bellevue.
                                                                    [courtesy LEX18]

Federal Judge David Bunning, son of the late Senator  (and
baseball Hall of Famer) Jim Bunning, ruled that the state of
Kentucky, and not Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis person-
ally, must pay the $225,000 in legal fees incurred by homo-
sexuals who sued Davis for marriage licenses.

                                    [courtesy Louisville Courier-Journal]

A lawyer  in Edmonson County was disciplined by the state
bar association for shooting a hole in the floor  of  his  own
house,  "a criminal act that reflects on the lawyer's honesty,
trustworthiness or fitness as a lawyer in other respects."

                                      [courtesy Kentucky Bar Association]

willrach.jpg Lexington's most wanted: William Jackson, BM, 52, featured fugitive of the week, sodomy; Rachel Brumfield, WF, 31, 5'6", 145 lbs, lobotomy; Joshua Lavisso, BM, 21, 5'8", 135 lbs, just learnin'; Brian Noel, WM, 33, 5'5", 125 lbs, not learnin'; Damien Taylor, BM, 24, 5'6", 160 lbs, 'It's all good' (pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "Excuse me, miss, but if politics makes strange bedfellows,   would you be my Republican?" – Leonard Simon

Additional detail on the JonBenet Ramsey case, not found even in the
link given above,  is that the main suspect is  Keith  Schwinaman,  52;
that part of his plea deal in the other crimes was that  his  DNA  could
not be used against him in any other case  (including JonBenet's),  and
that pedophile John Mark Carr, who once falsely confessed to the mur-
der,  was  with  JonBenet  when she died  and helped stage the murder,
and knew Schwinaman  but has not yet identified him as the killer. . . .
A blonde Australian woman who called 911 in Minneapolis, Minneso-
ta,  to report a disturbance was shot to death by a Somali immigrant ci-
ty policeman. . . . Maryam Sharif,  daughter of Pakistan's prime minis-
ter,  presented in her defense to corruption allegations a  document  da-
ted in 2006 but printed in Calibri,  a type font not released to the public
until 2007. . . . Doctors preparing to remove cataracts found 27 smash-
ed "monthly disposable" contact lenses in a woman's eye in London. . . .
Police said the hostess who got shot at her  "gender  reveal"  party in a
Cincinnati, Ohio, suburb did not lose her baby, as was reported earlier,
because she was not pregnant to begin with.  . . . A woman was arrest-
ed in Springfield,  Oregon,  for towing three children in a plastic wag-
on hitched to her car in circles around a  "roundabout." . . . A 16-year-
old runaway from Minnesota, not seen by his family since 1976,  was
identified as another victim of John Wayne Gacy.
                                                                                [courtesy LEX18, AP]

haylywen.jpg Texoma's most wanted fugitives of the week: Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas) for: Hayley Casarez, 21, black hair, brown eyes, 120 lbs, 5'0", attorney off bond, credit card abuse; Wenday Dale Patterson, 44, blonde hair, brown eyes, 124 lbs, 5'4", surety off bond, possession of controlled substance PG1 o/1g - u/4g; guodaddl.jpg Wanted in Wichita, Kansas (not Wichita Falls, Texas): Rachel Marie Guodaddle, WF, 43, 5'1'", 160 lbs, probation violation on theft; Meriah D. Hightower, WF, a/k/a Meriah D. Duchess a/k/a Meriah Dawn Hightower, 35, 5'1", 110 lbs, brown hair, brown eyes, tattoos shouolders, right hand ("Heaven knows"), left arm ("Li'l Bit"), left ankle (rose/butterfly), right arm (hummingbird), right hip (unicorn), right calf ("Ryan"), probation viol. opiates (Sedgwick County Sheriff); [WFalls] Robert Alan Miller, 54, grey hair, blue eyes, 190 lbs, 5'10", manufacture/delivery of controlled substance PG1 o/4g - u/20g

Louisville, Kentuckian, Justin        Thomas opened the British O-        pen  golf tournament  wearing        a tie and a cardigan  (he  com-        pleted the first round  tied  for        6th place at 3 under par).

My son is 29.  He has no vanity at all.  He does not care
how he dresses or looks.  He has  always  been this way.
He just got married,  and his wife is a darling.  How can
I make him understand how important this is  – not only
to him,  but also to his wife?
                                                                Concerned Mom

    Don't  forget!    Readers interested in intellectual dissection of
important current events are invited to attend the Weekly World
News Round Table at the offices of Borf Books outside Browns-
ville, Kentucky, just after church every Sunday.  Guest  speakers
lined up for meetings in the near future include the Sunday Mob:
  

:

Two neighbors shot it out over a backyard fence in
Greenwood  (one of them was said to have made a
disparaging remark about the other's wife).

                                                        [courtesy BBC]

The "WAR ON TERRIORISM" bench was replaced.

                                                         [courtesy WANE]

Fifty goats, nine cows and a pig were rescued from a
Delaware County farm by animal care officials as ten
head of cattle died in a semitrailer rollover nearby. . . .

A Daleville couple who had  111  cats  in their home
pleaded guilty to child neglect. . . .

A 13-year-old boy playing basketball  in  Hammond
was killed by a  falling  bullet,  apparently fired into
the air by someone in a neighboring community. . . .

Despite what you might have read in  earlier  editions
and earnest efforts by the state legislature,  the  "Who
can sell cold beer in Indiana?" law  is not exactly set-
tled yet. For a nearly unfathomable report on an issue
even more complicated than "affordable health care,"
see this article, beginning at a country store near Ter-
re Haute.
                                      [courtesy Columbus Republic]

A contractor was indicted for bribing the director of St. Jo-
seph's Hospital in Lexington for a construction job (the di-
rector also was indicted). . . .

Inmates rioted over losing TV privileges in a disciplinary
measure at the Mason County Jail in Maysville. . . .

chickens.jpg Thousands of frozen chickens crossed the road as a semitrailer overturned on the Bowling Green - Owensboro Green River ("Natcher") Parkway near Bowling Green

The Bourbon virus,  of which the woman in Sullivan, Mis-
souri, died after being bitten by a tick, was named not after
Kentucky bourbon whiskey,  but  for  a  county  in  Kansas
(but  Bourbon  County,  Kansas,  was  named  for Bourbon
County, Kentucky). . . .
 
A young couple committing a burglary pistol-whipped three
persons in a home in Louisville  and  cut  off  one of the vic-
tims' fingers with bolt cutters.
                                                                    [courtesy LEX18]

sarahead.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Adrian Agbor, BM, 24, 5'8", 163 lbs, tampering; Nikki White, BF, 32, 5'6", 150 lbs, pampering (pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader); Wanted by KSP: Donnie Phelps, WM, 40, 5'3", 130 lbs, failure to appear on two counts of failure to appear (Kentucky State Police, Post 3, Bowling Green); Wanted in Atlanta: Sarah Craighead, WF, superintendent of Mammoth Cave National Park, has been promoted to deputy regional director of the National Park Service (Park City (Bowling Green) Daily News)

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "I ran into a zombie the other day, a pretty good old roadie,   said he'd been dead since '89:  A couple of bumps,  a joint   and a Marlboro,  and he found his smile." – Leonard Simon

suebrick.jpg Celebrity lookalikes: Sue Sue; Lauren Gotelaere, WF, 25, 5'2", 160 lbs, arrested in Abilene (Texas, not Kansas); Brick

Eight persons,  including three children,  were shot at a "gender reveal"
party in Cincinnati, Ohio,  including the pregnant host (the "gender" to
be "revealed" turned out to be the sex of the baby, who turned out to be
a dead boy;  another woman was killed). . . .  A 14-year-old girl was e-
lectrocuted when she dropped her "smart" phone,  plugged into a char-
ger,  into a bath she was taking in Lovington,  New Mexico. . . . A 51-
year-old woman was killed when her car struck a cow on Highway 24
west of Moulton, Alabama. . . . PETA took Natuto the monkey's selfie
copyright claim to a U.S. Court of Appeals. . . . Mattel  has made new
Ken  dolls  with two body types,  seven different skin tones,  and nine
new hair styles,  including a man bun. . . . Louie,  the 22-pound, 130-
year-old  lobster  who spent 20 years in the tank of a Long Island res-
taurant,  was released back into the  Atlantic  Ocean  (we're  guessing
this is the same lobster PETA (People for Eating Tasty Animals)  off-
ered $14.98 a pound for a dozen years ago). .  .  . Rob Lowe claims to
have  encountered  Bigfoot  on a TV shoot in the Ozark Mountains of
Missouri. . . . Donald Trump Jr. hired a mob lawyer. . . . Kid Rock was
running for the Senate (or was he?)
                                                             [courtesy LEX18, Harper's, AP]

     

morganss.jpt Texoma's most wanted Morgans of the week, Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas), Morgan Williams, 18, brown hair, brown eyes, 150 lbs, 5'5", order revoking, possession of controlled substance in drug free zone; Morgan Yonkey, 33, brown hair, green eyes, 135 lbs, 5'3", violation of probation, theft of property o/$500 u/$20,000

       

sixtopam.jpg Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas): Sixto Edgardo Alvarenga-Guerero, WM, 28, 5'5", 145 lbs, prob viol theft; Pamula Fay Newcomer, WF, 52, 5'5", 200 lbs, probation violation on contr. subst. off.; Ishmael R. Ridge, BM, 26, 6'0", 145 lbs, burglary and theft (Sedgwick County Sheriff); in Berrien County, Michigan: Stephen Christopher Miller, DUI 3rd (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

The interfuckinet said baseball's  All  Star  Game  would be on
CBS TV; but it was on Fox,  meaning that the best show on TV,
the Mick, was pre-empted.  (And,  how could Fox have done it
without the steroid - and- J-Lo- ridden Alex Rodriguez?)

I'm a 47-year-old man, and I live alone in a small city in New
York state.  I have a good job.  I have been with the company
for years,  and my bosses take good care of me.   However,  I
want to live a semi-homesteading-type life on my  own  prop-
erty.  I cannot do this where I live because of strict zoning.  I
am torn between leaving my job to move and living the life I
dream of and staying where I am and trying to get as close as
I can to that life style. Can you help me?
                                                                        Torn in New York

lifeloth.jpg Crossword puzzle: Lothario's organ: ROVING EYE Life Saver Dude: Aha! DICK would have taken only four spaces

:

Etta Jane Darrig wrote Weds 7/5/17 @ 10:15 CDT:

A "males of color academy" being planned in
Louisville?

Yes – a special middle school for the advancement of
black and "brown" boys.  Guess you could call it "re-
segregation,"  with a good purpose  (but didn't the or-
iginal segregation have a "good" purpose?).  – Editor

Border collies were patrolling the shores of Lake Michi-
gan to chase away Canada geese and seagulls. . . .

A pet duck in Anderson underwent surgery to correct his
walking pigeon-toed. . . .

A stone bench at a new Vietnam War memorial in Colum-
bia City bore the slogan  "WAR ON TERRIORISM"  be-
fore the designer taped over the errant I  (but maybe they
meant war on TERRIERISM and intended it for a fire hy-
drant).
                                           [courtesy Columbus Republic]
See also the sports.

amyrobin.jpg South Bend's most wanted, Amy Jones, WF, 5'7", 145 lbs, theft, battery, FTA; Wanted in Berrien County, Michigan: Robin Michelle Green, BF, assault by strangulation (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

A 38-year-old woman flipped her car on I-65 near Park City,
then took off in the car of  a  passer-by  who stopped to help
(she was arrested 32 miles later).
                                                                    [courtesy WKYT]

         

willtiff.jpg William Horn, WM, 56, 5'11", 170 lbs, mean and ornery; Tiffany Noe, 28, 5'2", 160 lbs, dependent; Sheri Phillips, WF, 28, 5'8", 300 lbs, independent as a hog on ice; Willard Ore, WM, 31, 6'2", 180 lbs, no more Mr. Nice Guy (pulled kicking & screaming from the Herald-Leader); lissakel.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Melissa Thomas, WF, 34, 5'3", 120 lbs, possession of forged instrument, A/K/A Kelley Walriven, WF, 39, 5'7", 145 lbs, same offense; same person?; Heather Seltsam, 45, sex with a minor (Bluegrass Crime Stoppers)

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "I may be an old dog, but you still make me bark." – Leonard Simon

ashlaurn.jpg Arrested in Abilene (Texas, not Kansas): Ashleigh Ford, BF, 28, 5'2", 215 lbs, possession of meth (& firewater); Lauren Gotelaere, WF, 25, 5'2", 160 lbs, endangering a child; Sharon Winchester, WF, 61, 5'9", 160 lbs, burglary (Abilene Crime Stoppers)

"The world is complicated.  It doesn't have to be.  With the
 NPR One App, you can hear only news stories that reflect
 your world view."

Also on National Public Radio,  hear  two  ditzes  –  Rachel
Martin and Jessica Mendoza  – talk  baseball.  And NPR bot-
tomed  this  in the very next episode on Morning Edition last
Wednesday in which  "J. Willgoose, Esq.,"  and  his  "Public
Service Broadcasting" band  attempted to explain the past in
a semimusical semipresentation (hope you got it; we didn't).

Traffic to the Statue of Liberty was closed on the New Jersey side  on
the eve of the 4th of July. . . . A man sat on his gun in the driver's seat
of his car in Jacksonville, Florida, and shot himself in the penis. . . . A
24-year-old mother died in Mexico from "dodgy' diet pills  purchased
on Clutterbook Facebook. . . . The History Channel reported new evi-
dence of the survival of Amelia Earhart (and, watch this space for ev-
idence of Bigfoot). . . . Searyl Atli Doty, a newborn in British Colum-
bia denied a birth certificate,  received a "health card"  without  a  sex
designation  (his/her/its "parent," Kori Doty, identified as "non-binary
trans," is represented by barbara findlay, a lawyer who spells his/her/-
its name without capital letters). . . .  A man in a bulletproof vest shot
a policeman with a bow and arrow in Chandler, Arizona. . . . A secu-
rity guard impersonating a policeman was arrested for pulling over a
policeman  in  Miami,  Florida. . . . A man arrested on an outstanding
warrant in Dakota County,  Minnesota,  invited the officer to frisk his
front  shirt  pocket,  where the officer found a Monopoly  "Get out of
jail free" card.
                                      [courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]

jacorina.jpg Jackie M. Johnson, WF, 42, 5'2", possession of opiates; Corrina Lee Murray, WF, 39, 5'7", 140 lbs, burglary/theft/probation violation (Sedgwick County Sheriff)

Purdue University expanded sales of alcoholic beverages at its
football and basketball games.

fredgr8s.jpg Celebrity lookalikes: Gene Wilder, George Washington, Frederick the Great

lifemose.jpg "Let my people go - to the bathroom" protester Life Saver Dude: Look, Dudes! The transgenders have a spokesman!

:

A man in Hobart accidentally shot and killed his 9-year-old
daughter with a handgun while instructing his sons on  gun
safety  (he "didn't know the gun was loaded").
 
                                              [courtesy Columbus Republic]

malikica.jpg South Bend's most wanted: Malik Gardner, BM, 5'11", 190 lbs, black hair, brown eyes, forgery, FTA; Heather Gipperich, WF, 5'0", 135 lbs, red hair, green eyes, neglect of dependent, meth; Erica Mays, BF, 5'5", 180 lbs, black(?) hair, brown eyes, false informing, theft; Daniel Boyer, WM, 5'8", 155 lbs, blond hair, hazel eyes, child pornography (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

The Jefferson County School Board, in Louisville, approved
plans for a "males of color academy."
                                                                    [Courier-Journal]



                                 Bristow, Warren County (Tabloid Headlines photos)

nosmokng.jpg Tobacco Store, drive in, no smoking, fireworks (Tabloid Headlines photos)

The Fire Department rescued 10 ducklings from a storm
drain in a business parking lot in Lexington. . . .

Rabbit  Hash  elected a new top dog,  Brynneth Pawltro,
rejecting a cat, a chicken and a donkey. . . .

A prisoner who escaped a jail work detail in Frankfort
was found in a public library.
                                                           [courtesy LEX18]

genaheat.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Ariel Oxendine, BF, 24, 5'6", 140 lbs, she's serious; Kimmaire Sellers, BF, 27, 5'5", 170 lbs, she just wants to have fun; Celebrity lookalikes: Heather West, WF, 41, 5'7", 180 lbs, wanted in Lexington for auto theft; Gena Yoakem, vital stats not disclosed, wanted everywhere (Herald-Leader, Clutterbook)

Having received a sweetheart deal to build Ark Encounter
in Williamstown,  promising to create jobs but saying later
they were available only to other fundamentalist Christians
and taking money from employees’ paychecks to  help  re-
pay loans,  Answers in Genesis now wants to avoid paying
a "safety fee" like other ticket-taking attractions in the area.

                                                                [courtesy J. Ewing]

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "A pretty woman looks better naked than dressed in purple." – Leonard Simon

                                 Deborah Harry, 72
                                 Jamie Farr, 83
                                 Leslie Caron, 86
                                
                                Olivia de Havilland, 101

A "grammar vigilante" using an "apostrophiser" has corrected signs in
Bristol, England,  including "Monday's to Friday's" and "Amys Nail's"
(apparently it deapostrophises,  too). . . .  Opening of the Willy Brandt
Brandenburg Airport in Berlin,  once planned for 2012, still is delayed
by  defective  cabling,  short escalators,  4,000 wrong-numbered doors,
and lack of smoke exhaust and alarms. . . . A man in Santa Ana,  Cali-
fornia,  buried the wrong man,  thinking it was his son.  . . . The  pilot
of an Air Asia X flight from Australia to Maylaysia  asked passengers
to pray as the plane "shook like a washing machine" (but it landed OK
back in Perth, where it began). . . . Italy's highest court ruled that keep-
ing live lobsters on ice was animal cruelty. . . .More than 16 million A-
merican adults think chocolate milk comes from brown cows,  accord-
ing to a poll (sorry, no black/white, Anglo/Latino or Christian/Muslim
breakdown was reported). . . . A man missing in Australia was report-
ed to have gotten high and attempted sex with a crocodile.  . . . Travel
ban "bona fide relationship" criteria reminiscent of Nazi definitions of
Jewishness were set out by the State Department.

                                                             [courtesy LEX18, Harper's, AP]

We have a lovely granddaughter  who is about to be mar-
ried to an excellent young man.  She is just out of college
and sweet, kind, smart, and hard-working.   But her wed-
ding will have a Wiccan theme,   and they are planning to
change their last name to a Wiccan name.

I'm pretty sure she doesn't actually follow this religion but.
rather, regards it as an entertaining idea.    As a Christian I
am uncomfortable with the theme.  Should we stay home?

                                                        Challenged in California

                        

burkdunc.jpg Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas): Steven Kent Burke, WM, 41, a/ki/a Bones, 5'10", 150 lbs, taggoos, chest, "Bones," "KHEPRI" and skull, left shoulder, clown, probation violation, possession of opiates and other controlled substances; Joseph L. Reed-Tolefree, BM, 23, a/k/a Joseph Levonn Reed-Tol, 5'8", 150 lbs, aggravated battery; Ryan  Dean Smith, WM, 35, 185 lbs, scars and tattoos both arms, probation violation; Danny Steven Duncan, WM, 51, a/k/a Steve Duncant, 5'4", 178 lbs, possession of drug paraphernalia; kaylajac.jpg Kayla Lara Jacob, WF, 28, 5'8", 160 lbs, eagle head tattoo on left arm, intentional bidily harm with a deadly weapon, probation violation; Jacqueline Annette Jones, BF, 35, 5'9", 230 lbs, tattoos, right neck, "Tank," left neck, "Son," right shoulder, "Phil," right wrist, "Amari," left wrist, "Ghavann," criminal threat, probation violation for transporting open container (Sedgwick County Sheriff)

lifeless.jpg "You need ten items or less to be in this line . . . fewer you mean fewer . . . stop resisting arrest with grammar . . . Life Saver Dude: Hey, dudes! The woman is right! She's innocent!