...you have a copy of this list and open it up in your notepad just to read a lot of these at one sitting.
...you find any of these funny.
...you don't find any of these funny.
...you type reports on your puter and you get a bad grade cause its full of :) and :
...mIRC is in your Windows startup group
... you wait 6 hours online for a certain "special" person to come home from work.
... you fear the people that actually spend more time on the irc than you do.
...you search round the web looking for more "You might be addicted to irc if" pages
...you end sentences with 3 periods while writing letters in pen/pencil.
...you got your psychiatrist addicted on irc too and are now undergoing therapy in a private channel instead of in his office.
...you always get an invitation for invite-only channels
..you measure the time it takes the ball to get back to the winning player during a ping pong match
...you think irc has cured your shyness
...you believe that a "byte" can hurt a "bit"
..your irc program IS your screensaver
...you don't have a family album but you did have a special cd made with all your favourite logs from past irc sessions
...you have ever tried to convince someone on the other side of the world that it was lunch time
...you want to be buried with your computer when it dies.. or vice versa
...you actually enjoy the fact that you are addicted.
..you know friends whom have died of an overdose of irc.
..you can actually read and follow all the names of the cast that scrolls up your tv-screen at the end of a movie.
..you have the urge to reply every time you read the readers column in a magazine or newspaper. Oops, this is more for the newsgroup addicts :)
..being called a newbie is a major insult. 
..your gravestone will have a quit message instead of a rip.
...you run a water line to the Mr. Coffee next to your desk so you don't have to "/away" to run coffee.
...you say "bbl" after finishing a conversation with someone
..there is absolutely no interesting conversation in any channels and you are really bored...yet you dont want to leave in case you "miss something"
...you put :) or ;) all over your web pages.
...you're worried about getting fat from too many e-pizzas.
...Whenever you write ANYTHING funny, you just HAVE to make a little smiley:)
.you double click your tv remote..
..You can't get on an irc server and you search the internet for a server that will let you on instead of doing your homework ...
...Your now 6 month old kid has his own computer, web-page & has actually been on IRC himself =)
...Family time is spent Online
...You own your own ISP just so you can get to IRC easier
...You spent 3 months travelling and living off people you met Online. ...You just read that and thought it was a good idea.
..You stay in school for the free PPP.
...You have had over 5 providers due to k-lines
...You know what a k-line is.
...There are over 10 servers with a k-line just for You
...You remember when EfNet started.
...You can now type over 70 wpm.
...you and your brother almost wreck your cars trying to get home to the computer first...
...you think how to spell words when you carry on a person to person conversation...
...you are on the phone for a minute and you need to do something else so you say "brb" or "bbl"
...you are bored and start up another client just to have someone to talk to
...you have ever had a conversation with a bot.
...you check your email and forget you have real mail in your mail box aka snail mail.
...You start School one day and wish you could just /ignore everyone ...
...you go into withdrawals during dinner...
...you raise your hand and say"OP ME!"
...you say to someone annoying, next time you will get a 15-minute ban. 
...When many people are speaking you say "hey, no flooding!" 
...When someone doesn't answer you say "PING!? PONG!"
...You spend at least 30 minutes making sure everyone in the channel says goodbye to you.
...You are an op in #wasteland
...You read the idea about a toilet seat in your desk chair and tried to do it.
...Your RL friends call you by your nick.
...Your parents call you by your nick. 
...Your teachers call you by your nick
...Your husband/wife calls you by your nick.
...Strangers call you by your nick. 
...you stop speaking in full sentences
...you've had the urge to copy and paste text from a magazine...and you wondered why it didn't work.
...You setup the program "screen" on your providers unix box so you can be logged into IRC 24/7...
...You've ever written a web page for IRC.
...You set your resolution to 1024x768 so you can have room for 3 or 4 IRC sessions and still be able to type here without missing any /msgs.
...You've ever started your own IRC network!
...You tried to make your own bot, but didn't have enough patience so just stole the source for someone else's bot.
...You remember when a channel of 50+ regulars had only 3 or 4 regulars.
...You've ever registered a channel on the Undernet or Dalnet.
...You've joined a help channel and ended up answering questions instead of asking the question you needed answered.
...You joined a channel for a client you've never used just to keep ops for a friend for a min, and ended up answering all the questions that came up.
...You've caused a netsplit to get ops back in your favourite channel. 
...You've lost at least 5 O: lines because of abuse.
...you use /action before you do anything
... You started your own channel and wanted to see how long before your bot can change the topic or kick someone out.
...a T3 Line is suddenly a legitimate option
...you see a jerk in a bar and your first reaction is to kick/ban 
... You actually subscribe to the OperList on the network you stay on, when you are not an oper!
..you set your kitchen on fire while cooking dinner because you wanted to "check you mail" and while you were there you just wanted to "see whose on"
... You find Yourself reading these...
...You ask your parents for things they have NO idea about like Scripts and Bots and Popups
...you realise that you are double clicking the remote control for your TV
...you have a TTY phone and aren't deaf 
...mirc is in your windows startup folder
...you've ever gone to one of those form-submit web page 'chats' just to say "you losers don't even know what irc is, do you? Huh!? DO YOU!?!" 
...you've ever logged on to dalnet. 
...you join #hispanola "just to work on my Spanish." 
...when someone on the channel asks if anyone knows some good servers, everyone else types your nick. 
...you join busy channels just to talk to yourself because the scrolling makes you feel better about it somehow.
...you've been lagged so bad that you've switched servers so much you can see you nick on the channel list 3 times.
...you live on #twilight_zone for months praying for an O: line
...you have at least 7 O: lines 
...to get revenge on someone you know in RL, you mail bomb them..through the US postal service, that is
...you have met over 100 ircers
...you /umode +s because you don't feel right without it 
...you don't know your boyfriend/girlfriend's first name
...your boyfriend/girlfriend in RL gets on IRC because it's the only way to reach you
...you know which servers are major hubs for the network you chat on...
...you read operlist
...you tell your rl friends you have plans already on saturday night when you don't
...your .ircrc is over 80k
...you feel a need to talk in all caps to certain people in RL
...your desk is the only part of your room you ever use
...you have ever put a smiley in a paper for school
...the Jehovah's Witnesses knock on the door, and all you can think of doing is flood them with PINGs. 
...You get a call from a telemarketer, and instead of hanging up on them, you set down the phone, and set their mode to -v 
...You call up your friend Nick, and /invite Nick to $chan
...You offer the babysitter OPS when you go out for the night 
...You refer to rush hour traffic as LAGGED... or to avoid traffic, you tell your passenger you need to quit for a second to switch servers 
...The word I is now replaced in your vocabulary with /me. 
...You raise your hand in class, and say "BRB" 
...You have more than 3 private MSG windows going simultaneously 
...You won't subscribe to a certain internet provider because they don't offer unlimited time per month 
..you turn down the lights and close the blinds so people won't know that you are on irc again! 
..you know more about your irc "friends" daily routines than you do your own spouses!
..you find yourself lying to others about your irc time. When they complain your phone is busy, you claim it was off the hook! 
..you have an identity crisis if someone else is using your nick. 
..you would rather tell people your bloodshot eyes are from partying too much instead of the truth (up all night on irc!) 
..you change nicks so much that you have to type /me to see who you are! 
..you put on special mood music while talking to certain people in private chats! 
..your friends on irc were above your RL friends on your Christmas card list! 
..you find yourself involved in channel politics on irc! 
..you ever turned down real hugs for {{hugs}} from your irc friends. 
..you have actually kept up with 10 conversations at one time! <---this one shows either great skill or that you are too far gone! 
..you postpone your college graduation date so you can keep your free .edu account! 
..you have ever written a pen-and-paper letter to someone and found it _impossible_ to do without smilies 
...you don't even bother answering the phone anymore...
...If you yell at ppl cause they aww using more than 2 w's and are messing up your URL list
...the first thing you say after coming out of a movie is, "Hey. Remember that funny line? It would make a perfect info line!"
...your first thought when your nick is taken is "VERSION"
...both you and your husband/wife have your own computer, server, and e-mail address.
...you keep making channels with one more "!", just so you can get the top of the channel list
... you constantly say "hello?" or "you lagged, boy" to anyone on the street.
... You are looking at this list when the channel you are on has less than 10 people
...you type in all lowercase now, even while typing assignments 
...you keep an irc window open while doing homework 
...you use irc as an excuse for procrastinating on homework 
...you type messages to people while you're talking to them on the phone 
...you hack your server idle time "so lamers do not bug me"
...your nick is mentioned on an irc web page (or worse...it's published in printed material somewhere) 
...you keep a client on 24/7 so someone doesn't steal your nick
...you have to ask what the year is...
... You join certain channels just to read the funny topics
...you have to replace your / and # keys every few weeks.
... if you write a letter like this "dear tom, lo! how r u doin well i gotta go bbl!"
...you enter a channel and the bots say "hi!", and you say "hi" back!
...you suggest to your company to hold its meetings on IRC so "The boss can put +m on"
...you name your pets after people you talk to on IRC.
...you ever tell a story in RL of something funny that happened on IRC to people that have no idea what it is.
...you smile sideways
...Whenever you log on to a server you immediately get 10 messages from people who have you on their notify list
...You can handle 10 messages
...You can't even remember the names to all the channels you have ops on
...Your internet provider disconnects you for using an *unlimited* account too much. ...After that happening you seriously consider a dedicated account
...you have a map on the wall with red thumbtacks to mark where people are
...People /msg you even when your nick has AWAY in it 
...People have your AWAY nick in their notify list 
...You've spent more than $300 on long distance calling those you met on IRC 
...You have 5 copies of an IRC client installed on your hard disk to be on more than one net at a time
...Whenever a netsplit or mode change occurs and someone asks what happened everyone in the channel says to ask you
... have opened a # called #IRCanonymous - topic 12 steppers for irc addicts ..."meets here"
...you look at an annoying friend and wish you could type /ignore 
...you can carry on a conversation with the bot(s)
...You're a regular on over 10 channels
...You have driven over 5 hours to meet an ircer
...You know what the correct format for a Y: line is
...You know what jupe.c does
...You read operlist
...You know irc scripting
...Your grandmother knows what a clonebot is
...you have the urge to kick people in real life. 
... Your family opens an internet coffeehouse and you get bummed 'cause most servers won't authorise you, so you keep your account at another server and dial in at 28.8 instead of using the 56k connection just 'cause you miss access to your fave server
... you include your nick in your e-mail signature
...You are in a liberal arts College, but all of your friends understand *lol*, brb, re, kewl, etc!
...you enter a room and you say /me greets all