Is it really the inside that counts?
Becasue I have added, mutiplied & divided
and I still add up to nothing.
"Believe in yourself."
Such an easy command to give,
and how easy to pretend to follow.
But on the inside you know what you ammount to.
You treat me how I deserve to be treated,
yet I still resent you for it.
Why do I constantly contradict myself?
I am willing to sacrifice myself in your behalf.
I would rather be ridiculed than have you be hurt.
Am I great or what?
The latter is the answer.
You know it too.
So quit acting so naive.
You & your friends can sit and
giggle all you want
pretending to be so happy.
You & I both know
that your insides are
rotting out from your
sickening act of sweetness.
Bile rises to my lips
everytime I see you,
think of you,
hear your name uttered.
I think I'm gonna be sick.
Yeah, cause you make me sick.
What is ideal?
Maybe I am the ideal & you
are the freakish one.
Now I shall torment you
the way you tormented me.
Let's see who goes home crying now?
Fake tears sugarcoat
your acid face.
How quickly I would
take off your mask to expose you to
the world and present
the real you.
Why I am the wicked
one for not conforming to your ways?
I cut my strings & I am no
longer your puppet.
So I will scream
louder
because you deserve to hear my cries.
My pleas.
I don't need you to like me
or conform to may ways.
Just as long as everybody else does.
And they will...
Won't they?
032597
no title
Alone & wondering
if it's all worth it.
I don't like to be used.
I do not like to be
a fair weather friend.
It all gets so old,
repititious acts
of mercy.
I try to free myself
from the burden
but I keep getting
sucked in.
For more abuse and
misuse.
Superficial morons
irritate me.
042097
no title
i have failed you i have let you down i want to change to be okay to be loved by someone else why can't i be happy the way i am does anyone know please let me be happy be okay with myself be happy alone be me & that's great why do i live in the past so much why can't i just let go of yesterday and reach eagerly for tomorrow i feel empty i want to be whole not separated 052398