THM : dont hate me

21/12/99

I dont know why I live in this world, I look in the mirror and see hatered and disgust. this world is too big and ready for me. and Im too little to late and too niave for it. i hate all and love nothing, maybe that will give me an edge , knowing that i hate myself , knowing . I can push my self a little harder cos i like the pain. cos i like to hurt, cos i like to hate. maybe one day i will be brave enough to end it all.

this blood is like poison in my vains, i have a will only to hate. that is the only emotion i can stand. the only true one. Like fire as you get closer i will kill you. Its so easy to hate and love at the one time.

Like a shock wave my soul will stop , i keep going fueled only by an unwilling ness to kill my self. i wish i had someone like me to care about, to be near. to poison and to burn.

You can see my death in my eyes. you know i tell the truth . you are the only one i would... PLease say its ok for me to die. dont tell them i did it. dont tell them i have my problems. dont Tell them im getting worse.

There is an ocean inside me. , but some times it catches on fire a fire which burns what i have done into my head, into my eyes and into my soul. HELP ME .

THis is for me