Part 1

"No, sorry, Taylor's not here, can I take a message?" I asked. Girls never stopped calling the stupid house asking for my brother. "No, I'm sorry, neither is Zac or Ike." I said hanging up. "I'm here, what are you talking about?" Zac said bounding down the stairs. "Just one of those giggly girls." I said looking at him. Him and I were the same age, except I was about 8 months older, don't ask, i don't want to know how our parents pulled that one off. "I like the giggly girls as a matter of fact." Zac said putting his hands on his hips. "Yeah I can tell." I said sitting on the steps to tie my shoes. "Are you coming to the park with me?" He asked rollerblades in hand. "Nope, I'm going to the mall with mom, she's making me get some new clothes." I said finishing tieing my bright shoe laces. "She's making you? That's a first! I have never heard anyone actually make you go to the mall to get clothes." Zac said opening the garage door. "Well, it's kinda hard to get new clothes when there are 10 people in this house." I said loud enough so my mom heard me in the kitchen. "Have fun." Zac said closing the door. Shopping with mom was always fun, yeah sure it was, especially when most of the time Avery Mackenzie and Jess came. I decided to wander into the kitchen to find my long haired mom. "Are you ready?" I asked irritated. "You know Julie, you are way more moody then Taylor is." Mom said laughing. I snorted. "Just to inform you, we can actually go alone to the mall, Dad took Avery and Mack to play putt-putt and Jessica is at a friends house, and I put Zoe..." She said going down the list. "OK, I get the point, can we go?" I asked. She was starting to get mad now. "Don't get that voice with me now Julie, I won't hesitate to ground you." My mom said shaking her finger at me. "Sorry." I mumbled. "Are you going to the mall?" Tay asked coming in from the living room. "Yes we are, and don't you need new shoes?" She asked putting her hair in a pony tail holder. "I don't know, I like these." Tay said looking down at his Doc. Martins. "All right, what are you planning on doing today?" She asked my brother as I went to get a glass of milk before we left, I have always gone with the philosophy if "Milk, it does a body good". "Do you think you can take me and Dan and Lawrence to the mall with you? We are supposed to meet some people." Tay said pushing me outof the way to get to the cabinet. "Well excuse me." I muttered. "i don't see why not." Mom said grabbingher pocket book. "No way, nu uh, not with his friends." I said devensively. Last time we went they wouldn't shut up. Tay gave me one of his you-better-watch-out looks. "Oh come on Julianna, they aren't that bad." Mom said laughing. "Oh, yeah sure, I can name a whole list of things that they are." I said bitterly. "What is wrong with you lately? Why have you been so sour?" My mom asked. "Yeah really, I wold like to know too." Tay said drinking out of the milk carton. "Nothing is wrong, I would be delighted to spend the after noon in the mall with you and your lovely friends." I said putting a faux smile on. "Good, I'll be right back." Taylor said bounding up the stairs. "Let's get in the car." Mom said motioning for me into the garage. Oh no, I really hope she wasn't going to make me get into a deep heart conversation like usual. We sat in the oversized van waiting for my older brother to come out in silence. "So, whats wrong?" My mother asked breaking the silence. "Nothing is wrong everything is fine and dandy." I said sarcastically. "No reall Julie, whats wrong? Did you have a fight with Lara again?" Mom asked gently. "No, Phoebe isn't really a friend, all she wants to do is come over and hang out with Taylor." I said disgusted, just thinking of the other day. "Oh, you and Phoebe were friends even before the guys got a label." Mom said starting the car as Tay came in. "Yeah, but still, even ask Tay." I said as he slid the back door open. "Ask Tay what?" He asked breathless. "Isn't it true that Phoebe totally drools over you?" I asked turning ot the back of the van. "Well, I mean Phoebe is Phoebe." Tay said putting on his seat belt. "But she does like you a whole lot right?" I said trying to get it out of him. "Yeah I guess." He said not even caring. "Told you mom." I said slumping back into my chair. "Well if that's all Phoebe does, why don't you hang out with Zac and his friends, they're your age." Mom said turning onto Dan's street. "I'd rather drop dead." I mumbled. They didn't understand. They would never understand. We pulled up to the big brick house where Dan lived, and his seven year old sister Stephanie came out running after her brother. "Hey Tay Tay can I have your autograph?" Stephanie said. "Steph how many times have I given it to you now? At least twenty." Tay said laughing as he signed the piece of paper. "Actually it is twenty four but thats ok." Steph said taking her pen and paper away from Tay. "What do you do with it?" Tay asked as Dan hopped over him. "I sell them duh!" She said running back into her house. Hehe, she sells Taylor's autograph? That is hilarious. "She does not." Tay said looking over at Dan. "Actually I have no idea, the squirt has been doing some crazy things lately." Dan said slipping on his seat belt. "I was wondering what she was doing with them." Tay muttered as he smiled to himself. I knew he enjoyed it, he always did. "Good morning Mrs. Hanson, Julie, how are you doing?" Dan sked politly. "I'm doing great Daniel, how are you?" Mom asked as she backed out of the driveway. "How about you?" She asked. "I'm very good thanks, how about you Julianna?" He asked putting his head between my seat and mom's. "I'm fine Dan, thanks for asking." I said sarcastically. Yuck, he was a brunette version of Taylor just what I wanted. I swear, he was so polite around adults, but when there is no adult, he is a devil child, reminds me of a few people.... "So we are meeting Lara , Jennifer, Duane, and Matt in front of the Gap right?" Dan asked sitting back. You know I am sitting here trying to block out my brother and his retarded friends conversation and what do I start thinking of? Names? I have always wondered why almost everybody in my family including me had all insisted on our middle names. My real name is Raegan Julianna, Taylor's is Jordan Taylor, Dad's (Walker) is Clarke Walker, Isaac's is Clarke Isaac, and Mackenzie's is Joshua Mackenzie. Only a few other family members didn't use there middle names, which I think is peculiar. "Mom why do almost all the family go by their middle names?" I asked right out of the blue. "What makes you ask that sort of question?" Mom asked with laughter in her voice. "I was just wondering, I mean only you, Zac, Avie, and Jess don't use your middle names." I said pondering why they didn't use them. "Well, you insisted on being called Julianna because you said Raegan sounded like a boy's name, and everybody else just liked the sound of there middle names better." Mom said keeping her eye on the road. "Hey Taybutt, how come you didn't keep Jordan as your name?" I asked turning to face the back seat. He stopped in mid conversation and looked at me blankly. "I don't know Julie, I just liked Taylor better." He said jumping right back into the meaningless conversation. Gosh I wish my brothers had just came back from one of their little promotional things, they were always so nice and sweet, and they never snapped at me. But almost all the time we're with them, so when we get the chance mom and I stay home with the little kids and let dad take them to wherever they are, so when they come back they are as sweet as angels. "OK everybody let's go." Mom said parking the car a million miles away from the mall entrance. "Taylor, hold on a second, you knowo the rules now, you can't leave my side at the mall, you know exactly why." Mom said slinging her pocketbook over her soulder and gave Tay a stern look. "Oh, come on mom, we get to meet girls, please, I swear to wear the dumb glasses, and if it means anything to you I'll even drag Julianna here with me." He said smiling the hugest smile he could and putting his arm around me and shoving me towards his hip in a tight squeeze. "Make him let go mom." I said gasping for air. Mom sat there thinking for a few minutes. "All right, I have to go into Sears for a little while, meet me at the food court in an hour, and then we have to take Julie shopping and you and your little girly friends can tag along, got that?" Mom said as we started our trip towards the entrance. "Sure mom, no problemo." Tay said as he knudged Dan in the ribs. Ugh why did they have to torture me so much. "And you two, wear the glasses." Mom said handing Taylor and I two pairs of Oakleys. They were so ugly. "Why do I have to wear them? Who is gonne reconize me?" I complained as I held the hideous glasses out in front of me. "If I have to wear them , then so do you quit complaining." Tay said shoving them onto my head. We walked into the huge entrance. Mall entrances always had a sort of strange essense to them, but I had been to this mall since i was 5 months old, it even said it in my baby book."5 months old, we took Raegan to the Tulsa Mall with grandma, she was horrified" that was back when I was called Raegan. "OK, an hour got that." Mom said as we halted to a stop in front of Sears. "Yup, I'll see you later mom, com eon Jules." Tay said grabbing my arm. I knew for the next hour I'd be tortured by them, or maybe I wouldn't I mean I usually hang out with them, but when girls are involved Taylor gets all crazy, just like Zac, except Zac sort of gets this silly grin, and Ike, you can just tell when a girl is within 5 feet. Usually the guys were pretty nice, but girls, forget about it, i was chopped liver compared to them. "So why are we meeting these girls?" I askas Dan walked into a surfer shop before we headed to the Gap. "Because these girls are hot, and because well, because they asked us." Tay said shrugging. I hung back a little as we entered the surfer shop. I was tempted to by one of those pins that said I'm With Stupid and an arrow pointed next to you, but before I did, I was dragged again out of the store. "Please Taylor stop dragging me, I swear I can walk, and it looks very peculiar." I said trying to pry his arm off me. "Well, I don't want to get you lost again." He said walking towards the big navy Gap sign. "That wasn't me Tay it was Zac, rememeber Taylor it wasn't me." i said trying to keep his attention as he walked staright towards two guys and two girls. I knew that nothing I said now would be heard through his ears. It never used to be like this, we used to be so close, all of us. "Hey guys, whats up?" Tay asked to the group of friends that were standing inside. "Nothing much just looking, oh Taylor is this your little sister?" One of the girls gushed as she took one look at me. Oh no, not one of THEM, the ones who pinch your cheeks and act like you're three when you are actually just a few years younger. "Yup, Julianna, this is Jennifer." Taylor said proudly. Bull crap he was proud, just proud that the stupid girl took notice to someone who he was related to or something for that matter. "Oh, she's so cute, this is my little sister, I think she's about your age." Jennifer said in that voice as she yanked the hand of a girl about my height with short brown hair. The girl rolled her eyes at me, but not at me, about the way her sister was acting. "You two will get along great." She said as Tay and her walked to a nearby rack. "I'm Lara." The girl said holding out her hand. "Yeah, I'm Julianna." I said taking it. "Yeah, I know, my sister is gaga over your brothers." She said laughing. "Who isn't?" I said a little too bitterly for my own good.

Part 2

"No offense, but not me." She said looking to the group. "You know what? I think I'm going to like you." I said laughing a little. "You're not offended? Why not?" She asked looking at me surprised. "Why would I be? Do you know how many girls out there drool literally just slobber over them, it's sickening there is nothing special about any of them." I said. Except about the way things have changed......but it doesn't matter anymore. "Good, I thought I'd offend you or something, your whole family seems so close, or at least I've heard." Lara said shrugging. Yeah, sure we were all real close, one big happy family, I wish. "So is Jennifer your only sister?" I said looking at the bubbly blond hanging on my brother. I hope I would never be like that, she was just so...so...perky. "Nah, I've got a younger brother but that's it really." She said skimming through a rack of skirts. "Lucky you." I muttered. "No, it really sucks, I wish I had a family like yours, it would be great." She said genuinly. Maybe I didn't like her, well I guess I would have to like her, she had that attitude that I liked in a person, ya know? "Please, can we stop talking about my family?" I begged a little. "Yeah sure, no problem." She said shutting her mouth quickly. "Hmm...think we should test our my brother and your sister, to see if they are actually paying the slightest bit of attention?" I asked getting bored with all the clothes. "I like the sound of that." Lara said eagerly as I stirred up a little plan. "Hey Tay, Jennifer! We're going to go jump off a bridge now, see you later." I called as Lara and I started for the door. All I heard were two grunts, and then two "Hey, what?". It took a while for it to sink in to there peabrain heads. "Come her Julie, if you get lost or something, mom'll kill me." Taylor said motioning me over to where they were inspecting lip gloss. I can't believe my brother would stoop to that level to looking at lip gloss, not him at all, it's not him anymore. "You too Lara." Jennifer said relaxing her face a little. "Man, I thought they'd not even notice." Lara whispered quietly as we went to stand next to the group of annoying 14 year olds. "They wouldn't have noticed we were gone if we hadn't said anything, believe me." I said. I knew Taylor wouldn't, he might have used too, but not any more. "So how old are you?" I asked as Tay pushed me out of the way to get by. "I'm 12, how about you?" She asked me as we were left stranded again. "I turned 13 a few days ago, Zac and i are the same age sort of." I said running after them. I knew if I didn't stay near him, I'd suffer the consequences. "What did you do for your birthday?" She asked me curiously. I didn't want to tell her what i did, but there was something about her that wanted me to tell her everything. "I spent it in Texas, in a hotel room, the guys were taping for Oprah that night, and I had a birthday party in the hotel room that night." I said ashamed. I knew it wasn't anything special, but at least Tay, Zac and Ike, were like they used to be then.... "Woah, that must have been the neatest thing in the world." Lara said beaming. What was she nuts? At least it kinda made me feel better. "Why would that be cool?" I asked. I would really like to hear this lovely explanation. "Well, I mean, i don't know, it just sounds kinda glamorous, except for the fact it is in a hotel room, you know what I mean." She said disgusted with her useless explanation. "Sure." I mumbled. I really didn't know. I would have rather been sitting in my nice comfty room with my brothers on some sort of trip to somewhere. But if it was like it used to be, everything would have been different, everything. "Come on squirts." Tay said walking out. These shades were killing my eyes, I had to take them off. "Squirts? Did he just call us squirts?" Pointing to herself in defense. "Obviously he did, he shouldn't be talking." I said as we followed the group out the door. We were like those little puppy's that trot behind their owners. "Put on your glasses." Tay said as we were walking. Dang it, he noticed, I thought he wouldn't. "No, they hurt my eyes too much, nobody will notice me, believe me." I said putting the sunglasses in my pocket. "Just remember Julianna, if somebody starts to mob you, I'm not helping." Tay said as he turned to Jennifer. Yeah, I know, you wouldn't help me for anything. "People actually mob you?" Lara asked trying to look me in the eye. I knew I had a grave scary look on it, I could tell, people always backed off when I had that look. The look was the look, when I was about to cry. But about was the word. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction, nope not Taylor, not Zac, not Ike, none of them.