By the way, here's a Challenge Response I wrote this evening to Jen's 
Mary Sue challenge. I don't think it's exactly what she had in 
mind. See what you think.

****

The Assistant

****

"I swear, Julian, she is the most useless assistant I've ever had."

The doctor grinned at Garak's uncharacteristic choice of words. "Worse
than Pellara?"

The Cardassian grimaced as he picked at his food. "I didn't choose
Pellara; Quark more or less forced me to hire her." He shook his head.
"At any rate, Pellara was merely clumsy. This woman....what possessed
me to hire her is quite beyond me."

"Besides her good looks."

"Besides her good looks, which in my opinion are vastly overrated. The
only new customer we had all day was this bald Starfleet captain who
kept staring at her and murmuring "Beverly" over and over again. And
all he bought was a scarf."

"Maybe this Captain has a thing for redheads."

"Maybe this Captain has a thing for idiots," Garak countered. Julian
snickered.

They ate in silence for a minute, then Julian asked, "If she's so
useless why'd you hire her in the first place?"

Garak shrugged his shoulders. "She said she could sew. Another vastly
overrated claim. Yesterday," he growled, gesturing with his fork, "she
sewed the left sleeve of a blouse to the right shoulder. When she
noticed her mistake, instead of fixing it she just dropped it back in
the To Do bin and traipsed along home."

"Not very professional."

"Not at all, considering the customer was expected in the next day. I
actually had to go to her quarters and request that she return to
finish her work. Do you know what she has in there?" Not waiting for
Julian's guess, he continued. 'This black -- thing --"

"I believe it's called a dog, Elim."

"Whatever it's called, it jumped on me and left black hairs all
over my white leggings. I had to push it away with my foot."

Julian stared at him."Good God, Elim, he was just trying to be
friendly, and you KICKED him?" He rolled his eyes in disgust.
"Sometimes you amaze me."

"If you're so enamoured of the beast, you can clean the hairs out of
the recycler tonight. I'll bet you there's a mat of greasy black fur
in there by now."

"Most of it ours," the doctor rebutted as he finished his hasperat.
"You're just trying to find another reason to fire his owner."

"Well, do you blame --" but Garak was interrupted by a PADD being
slammed down in front of him. He looked up into the angry eyes of his
assistant.

Her eyes flashed angrily, "You kick my dog, you belittle my work, and
now you gossip about me in the replimat? You know, I don't have to put
up with this."

Garak immediately assumed his normal obsequious tone of voice.
"Charlene, my dear. Why don't you sit down and --"

"Go straight to hell, Garak. I quit." And with that she swept away.

They watched her stride angrily across the Promenade to the
turbolifts. "Well," Julian ventured, "I guess your problem's been
solved. Maybe next time you'll take my advice and hire someone with
the proper training?"

Garak paid him no attention. "I feel as if a weight has been lifted
from my shoulders," he cried, his voice rising as he spread his arms.
"Birds are singing in the linara trees."

Julian grinned. "Dogs are gamboling in the meadow, free from kicking
Cardassians."

"Don't push it, Julian."


--

Charlene Vickers cvickers@internorth.com 
Yellowknife, NWT, Canada - where men are men and there ain't no sheep
http://users.internorth.com/~cvickers/mainpage.htm