November 1900

Her hands gripped the cold, iron railing of the Brooklyn Bridge and she stared down through the heavy fog into the river below. She shivered. Was this how Theo had felt? Dizzy? Had he been wondering what it would feel like to be swallowed by the icy depths? Had he thought about her as he fell? As he hit the water? As he went under? Did he know when he went under or had the fall alone killed him?

She could hear the small waves lapping at the base of the iron structure, far below, the gentle waves sounding like beckoning voices. Voices that called to her. A lone seagull flew overhead and she looked up. It's stark whiteness was in deep contrast to the dark gray sky that rolled with storm clouds. She looked back down into the choppy water, hundreds of feet below her. She leaned just a little bit farther over. She closed her eyes, silently asking God to forgive her...

Racetrack walked along the sidewalk, heading toward Brooklyn. Spot was always ready for a quick game of poker. He looked down at his feet as he shuffled along. He approached the bridge and looked up. The awesome span of metal, suspended by thousands of wires, never ceased to amaze him. Suddenly he spied a lone figure, nearly hidden from his view by the thick fog, that was leaning precariously over the railing of the bridge. He realized that the woman was about to jump.

"Hey!" he yelled, breaking into a run. She turned her head, but her hands continued to grip the railing tightly.

"Don't try to stop me!" she cried "This isn't your concern!"

Racetrack skidded to a stop, several feet from her. She leaned a little farther over the railing.

"Why are ya doin' dis?" Racetrack asked, stalling for time.

"Why do you care?" she asked in return.

She turned her face to him again. Her skin was pale against her dark, black hair, and her deep blue eyes were clouded over with tears. Through the tears, though, Racetrack could see the despair and the lonliness, the heartache and the desperation.

"'Cause I know dat ya really don't wanna do dis!" he finally answered.

"How can you know anything about me?" she shouted back. "You have no idea what my life is like!"

"No, I don't, but it can't be bad enough ta make dis worth it," Racetrack said, creeping a little closer.

"You don't know what it's been like since Theo died," she said.

"Was he yer husband?" Racetrack guessed, seeing the wedding ring she wore on her left hand. The woman nodded.

"I loved him with all my heart, I really did, but then a month ago the police showed up at my door saying that he had handed a bystander my name and address and his wedding ring just before he jumped off this bridge," the woman said, tears falling from her eyes at a fast rate. "Why did he do it?" she asked, looking at Racetrack again. "How could he leave me like this? How?" Her voice broke.

She looked away, sobbing, and Racetrack reached out quickly, grasping her arm tightly. She looked back at him and stepped slowly down from the railing. As she stepped down, she fell against Racetrack and he wrapped his arms tightly around her, holding her while she sobbed.

"Come on," he said quietly. "Let's go somewhere an' talk."

She allowed him to lead her off the bridge and back into Manhattan. He found a bench at the base of the bridge that somewhat protected them from the cold November air. They sat on the bench and Racetrack released her.

"My name's Racetrack," he said as he handed her his handkerchief. She took it and dried her eyes.

"I'm Lydia Adler," she said. "What kind of a name is that, anyway?" she asked. "Racetrack?"

"Dat ain't my real name," he said. "Dey gave it to me when I became a newsie. All the newsies've gotta 'ave a nickname. It's kinda tradition, ya know? I like to bet on the races down at the tracks, so dat's where Jack came up with my name."

"Jack?" Lydia asked.

"Yeah, Jack Kelly, he's sorta our leader. At least of the Manhattan newsies."

"I've heard of him before," she said. "During the strike."

"Yeah, he got pretty famous back then. So where do ya live?"

"That's a small part of my problem," Lydia said, "I was evicted yesterday."

"Ya can stay at the Newsboy's Lodgin' House, where I live wid lots of other newsies. We're sorta like a lodgin' house for newsies an' everybody else." He laughed. "Unofficial hotel, ya know?"

"I would appreciate that, if you're sure it would be all right."

"Positive."

"Well, if I am going to stay at this Lodging House, you ought to know some things about me," she said.

"Like what?"

"Well, for starters, my name's Lydia Adler, as I said before. Theo and I were married for five months before he...jumped." She paused and looked back up at the Brooklyn Bridge that loomed above her. "That was a month ago."

A recollection suddenly blazed through Racetrack's mind---a headline; a story. He remembered the headline in The World a month earlier. "Man Leaps To Death From Bridge". It had been on page eight. People jumped from the Brooklyn Bridge at least once a month, therefore it wasn't that uncommon, but it always sold a lot of papers. He remembered how many that one had sold.

Racetrack glanced over at Lydia. Her eyes had become teary again as she gazed at the bridge and her hair blew wildly about her face. He had hawked the headlines for years, but this was the first time he had ever met one of the victims behind one of those headlines.

Lydia went on, "I couldn't think straight for days---weeks. I couldn't believe that he had done this to me. I knew he had been down about losing his job and I knew that he was worried about how he was going to support us, but I never thought he would hit such a low point.

"After I got over the initial shock, I was so angry at him!" she exclaimed. "I hadn't even been able to tell him my news. I was going to have a baby and I was planning to tell him that night, but he didn't give me a chance. He'll never know he was going to be a father and our child will never know its father."

"You're gonna 'ave a baby?" Racetrack asked, looking at her with surprise. She was wearing a heavy coat that made it difficult to see her figure. She saw him staring and blushed slightly.

"It isn't very noticeable yet," she said. "I'm only three months along."

"Oh," Racetrack said, uncomfortably. "Ya really do need a place ta stay, don't ya?"

"Desperately," she replied. "I refuse to have my child on the street."

"But ya were gettin' ready ta kill yerself!" Racetrack protested. This woman mystified him. She was silent for a long time.

"I didn't think that I had another option," she said softly. "I don't have any family and neither did Theo. He was all I had before he killed himself. I just wanted to be with him again and thought that jumping was my only solution."

A lone tear ran down her cheek and dropped onto her lap. Racetrack watched her in silence.

"Thank you for stopping me," she said quietly. "I didn't think of what I would be leaving. If you hadn't come along I'd...be..." she trailed off and gestured to the water. Racetrack shivered at the thought.

"Listen, I'm jus' glad I could help ya," he said.

"I'm so tired of being tired, if that makes any sense," Lydia said.

"Yeah, it makes sense," he responded. "Ya wanna go on ta the Lodgin' House now? Ya can rest while I sell the rest of my papes. Kloppman'll take care of ya."

"Who's Kloppman?" she asked.

"He's the guy who runs the Lodgin' House an' keeps all of us in line," he said with a grin. "Ya got any stuff, ya know, clothes an' things?"

"No, I didn't think I would need anything like that again," she replied and he nodded.

"Well, I'm sure we can round up some stuff for ya," he said. "Leave it ta me."

He took her arm and led her away from the bridge and toward her new life.

An hour later, Lydia was led to the second floor of the Lodging House by Kloppman.

"Ya can stay as long as ya need to, Mrs. Adler," he said.

"Lydia," she corrected.

"All right, Lydia. There's a bunk under the window, there that isn't bein' used."

"Thank you, that'll be fine."

"There's a bookshelf downstairs, if ya wanna read or ya can rest for now. Racetrack said he'd spread the word about ya bein' here and try to round up some clothes and things for ya. Is there anything else ya need?"

"No, thank you," she replied. "You've done so much as it is."

"No problem," he replied. "I had a daughter once, a long time ago. She had a baby too, but they both died in a housefire, about twenty-five years ago. I only wish I could've done somethin' else for her," he said wistfully. Lydia put a comforting hand on his shoulder and he smiled at her before her left the room, closing the door behind him.

Lydia removed her coat and shawl and draped them over the end of her bed. She removed her boots as well and slid them under the edge of her bed. Feeling tired, drained, and overwhelmingly sad, she crawled beneath the sheets, still fully clothed, and stared out of the window at the cloudly, gray sky.

"Why did you leave me Theo? Why did you not let me help you? Why did you think that jumping was the only solution? You never even knew that I was expecting a child. God, I miss you, Theo. Why did you leave me behind? Why couldn't we have gone together?"

Not being able to say anymore, Lydia rolled over on her side, shutting her eyes against the tears, and letting blessed sleep claim her.

Racetrack found most of his friends at Tibby's, having their dinners. They looked up as he entered.

"Heya Race!" Mush called.

"Somebody said dey saw ya goin' inta the Lodgin' House wid a girl," Jack said, never one to beat around the bush.

"Yeah, 'er name's Lydia Adler," Racetrack informed them, sitting at their table and taking the plate of food someone handed him. "She's gonna be staying wid us fer awhile."

"Why?" Blink asked.

"She got evicted yesterday an' needs a place ta stay. She's gonna 'ave a baby."

Jack had been leaning his chair back, but at Racetrack's words, he let the two front legs fall back to the floor with a clunk and everyone else fell silent, their forks paused mid-way to their mouths. Racetrack looked up and around him and quickly realized what they were all thinking.

"Hey now!" he said. "I jus' met 'er taday! Don't look at me like dat!"

The newsies noticeably relaxed.

"Sorry Race," said David, with a little laugh as he returned to his dinner. "It's just the way ya said it."

"I stopped 'er from jumpin' off the Brooklyn Bridge earlier," Racetrack explained. "Ya remember dat headline 'bout a month ago, 'bout dat guy givin' some passin' man his weddin' ring 'fore he jumped off the bridge?" They all nodded and he continued. "Dat was 'er husband, Theo."

"What kind of a bastard goes an' kills himself, leavin' his wife behind when she's pregnant?" Jack asked, angrily.

"He didn't know 'bout the baby," Racetrack said quickly. "An' she didn't seem angry wid 'im taday, although she said she used ta be. She really misses 'im. She must've really loved 'im."

"How long's she stayin'?" Crutchy asked and Racetrack shrugged.

"'Till she gets past wantin' ta kill herself, I guess," he said. "She ain't got no family so she really doesn't 'ave a place ta stay an' she's still got six months 'till the baby comes. She might stay 'till then."

"Wow," Specs whispered.

"Meanwhile," Racetrack continued. "She ain't got any clothes 'cept the one's she's wearin'. Do ya know where we could come up wid some stuff?"

"I'll ask Ma and Sarah," David said. "Ya guys go on back to the Lodging House and I'll go see what I can do. I'll meet ya back there."

"Sure Dave," Racetrack said as he and his friends finished their dinners, paid, and left. "Thanks."

Racetrack entered the bedroom with several newsies behind him. He stopped when he saw that Lydia was still asleep. They crept back downstairs, deciding to let her sleep until Mrs. Jacobs came.

David entered the Lodging House about forty-five minutes later with his mother behind him, carrying all sorts of bags with her.

"Is she upstairs?" Mrs. Jacobs asked Racetrack and he nodded.

"She was asleep an' so we didn't wake 'er up."

"Well, just go on about your business and I'll see to Lydia, the poor dear," Mrs. Jacobs clucked. "Ya did a great thing today, Race," she continued. "Stopping her was the best thing you could have done."

She gave him a quick hug before breezing up the stairs. She entered the bedroom quietly to find Lydia still sleeping. She set her bags down beside Lydia's bed and sat herself on the edge of it. Smoothing Lydia's dark, silky curls off the girl's forehead, she called Lydia's name softly. Lydia's wide blue eyes fluttered open and she started at Mrs. Jacobs' face, for it was unfamiliar.

"It's all right, Lydia," she said. "I'm Esther Jacobs. My son, David, is a newsie and is a friend of Racetrack's."

Lydia sat up a bit and smiled.

"Hello," she said. "I'm Lydia Adler."

"Yes, they told me. They also said that you didn't have any belongings of your own anymore."

"No, I don't. I was really planning to...well, jump off of the bridge today. I realize now that that sounds silly and childish, but I really didn't know what else to do," Lydia said, dropping her gaze to the bedsheets.

"That doesn't sound silly or childish, Lydia, but it does sound desperate," Mrs. Jacobs said. "Would you really have jumped if Race hadn't come along?"

"Yes," Lydia answered without a moment's hesitation. "I just wanted to be with Theo again. I still do, but now I don't know how." Tears welled up in her eyes and Mrs. Jacobs hugged her tightly for a long time.

"I know, Lydia," she whispered, "but you can't do that by killing yourself. Would he have wanted you to do that or would he have wanted you to go on with your life and have your child?"

"I hadn't thought of what he would want before," Lydia admitted. She was silent for a long time. "He would want me to go on and raise our child, even if he wouldn't be there to help me."

"Then that's what you have to do now. Kloppman can find you things to do around here, I'm sure. This is the home of nearly forty boys and one old man. Believe me, it isn't the cleanest place around. I'll bet Kloppman would hire you on as a housekeeper of sorts. you could at least work for the next four or five months. Then you'd want to take it easy until that baby comes. I'll suggest it to him later, if you want," Mrs. Jacobs offered.

"I would like that, actually," Lydia said. "Theo used to tease me by saying that we'd have to move to a ground level apartment to keep from falling through the holes that I was sure to wear through the floor by scrubbing them so much." She laughed a bit sadly and Mrs. Jacobs smiled kindly.

"Good, then I'll suggest it as long as you promise not to work yourself too hard."

"I promise."

"Wonderful. Now then, they tell me that you don't have any belongings of your own, so my daughter Sarah and I gathered some of our things to give to you. I brought them with me," she said, reaching for the bags she had set beside the bed.

"Oh no," Lydia said quickly. "I couldn't take your things, I just couldn't---" Mrs. Jacobs interrupted her.

"Don't be silly. Sarah and I were glad to give you some of our things, now crawl out from under those sheets and we'll see what fits you."

Mrs. Jacobs spent the next thirty minutes holding clothes up to Lydia and then putting them in one of two piles on the bed. At last they had assembled a small wardrobe for Lydia.

"Now I have to leave because I have an apartment, a husband, and three children to take care of, but let me know if you need anything else or if you just want to talk, all right?" Mrs. Jacobs asked.

"I will, thank you again," Lydia said.

"Anytime." Mrs. Jacobs gave her another hug before leaving, carrying her bags with her.

It had begun to grow dark and Lydia turned on the lights as Mrs. Jacobs left, giving the room a warm glow. She then began to fold her new clothes and stack them on her bed. The bedroom door opened and Racetrack entered hesitantly. She smiled and he relaxed somewhat.

"Come on in," she offered. He did and sat on the bunk opposite her, watching as she knelt on the floor, folding blouses and skirts, and then stacking them neatly on her bed.

"So did ya an' Mrs. Jacobs get 'long well?" he finally asked.

"Oh, yes, very well. She was so kind to listen to me," Lydia said. "I think that between her and you, I've realized that jumping off that bridge earlier wouldn't have solved anything." She paused for a moment and when she spoke again, her voice was much lowered. "As hard as it might be, I'll have to learn to go on without Theo." She fingered the lace on a blouse.

"We'll all help ya," Racetrack offered.

"Speaking of all of you, you're the only one I've met," Lydia said, looking up, and Racetrack looked surprised.

"Dat's right!" he exclaimed. "Some of 'em are downstairs if ya wanna meet 'em now."

"Sure, go right ahead and bring them up," Lydia said and Racetrack ran downstairs bringing Jack, David, Mush, Kid Blink, Specs, Crutchy, and Bumlets back up with him.

Lydia looked up as they entered and stood, dusting off her skirt as she did so. They all seemed surprised by how young she was. She looked about their age, if not a little younger. Her black. curly hair had been pulled back with a blue ribbon, but several unruly curls had escaped and fell about her face and shoulders. Her dark blue eyes were wide with curiosity and were framed by thick, black lashes. She was petite and delicately thin, though her waist was slightly enlarged, but she had been right when she had told Racetrack that her condition wasn't yet very noticeable.

"Everybody, this is Lydia Adler," Racetrack spoke up. "This is Jack, David, Bumlets, Specs, Crutchy, Blink an' Mush," he said, pointing to each newsie in turn.

"Hello," she said. "It's nice to meet all of you."

"Hey Lydia, I hear yer gonna be stayin' 'ere a while," Jack said, holding out his hand. She shook it.

"For some time," she answered. "I don't want to inconvenience you any longer than necessary."

"Aw, it ain't an inconvenience," Blink said, taking a seat on his bed. One by one the other newsies gravitated to their bunks as well, David taking a seat on the floor, for he was only staying for a little while longer.

"So did Ma help ya find some things?" David asked her.

"Yes, quite a few things, actually. She and your sister were very kind to give me their clothes like that," Lydia replied.

"They love doing that sort of thing," David laughed. "They'll probably back to see how you're doing fairly often. Ma can't just help someone once; she has to follow everything up."

"Mrs. Jacobs said ya were gonna work 'round 'ere," Racetrack said to Lydia.

"Well, yes. Cleaning, cooking, that sort of thing," Lydia answered.

"Are ya sure dat ain't too much work for ya?" Race asked worridly. Lydia smiled kindly.

"Of course not. If I weren't here, I'd just be running an apartment. There isn't that much difference."

Jack watched Race carefully then spoke. "Hey, Race, can I talk wid ya for a minute?"

"Sure Jack, but why---"

"Neva mind, jus' come inta the hall."

Once they had both walked out and closed the door behind them, Lydia looked around her at the other newsies. "Was it something I said?" she asked. They shrugged, unsure themselves.

Out in the hall Jack lowered his voice, but looked Race right in the eye. "Look, Race, I can tell ya already like Lydia an'---"

"But I don't!" Race protested.

"Ya can't fool me like ya can fool ev'rybody else, Anthony Higgins," Jack said and Race shut up. Whenever Jack used your real name, you knew that you better can it and listen to him or else face the possibility of receiving the soaking of your life. Jack went on, "I don't blame ya, Race. She's real nice an' real pretty, but she jus' ain't like all the other girls we've known, 'kay? 'Er husband went an' killed himself an' she's gonna 'ave a baby on top of dat. She may be younger than us, but she's more grown up by a long shot."

"So what'cha sayin', Jack?" Race asked. "I know all dat. What's your point?"

"My point is dat ya betta be careful what ya say or do wid 'er, ya got it, Race? She's a lot different. Watch what ya get yourself inta."

"Okay! I will," Race promised and Jack stepped back, looking satisfied. What he didn't know was that Race had known he was a goner the minute he'd looked into Lydia's eyes on the bridge earlier and that Race knew that life was only going to get more complicated from here.

When Racetrack awoke with everyone else the next morning, he noticed that Lydia had slept through every one of Kloppman's rude awakenings. She must be exhausted, he thought to himself and was careful not to let anyone wake her up.

Racetrack came back to the Lodging House earlier than everyone else and found Lydia in the kitchen by following his nose. She was making dinner and it smelled better than anything that Tibby's had to offer. She looked up from the stove when he entered and smiled warmly. Race almost melted right there on the floor.

"Hi, Race. How'd you do selling today?" she asked.

"Good, but I did betta at the track," he answered, taking a seat in one of the chairs that was at the small, round table in the middle of the kitchen.

"Congratulations."

"Thanks. What'cha fixin'? It sure smells betta than what I'm used ta."

"I hope everyone else will think so too," Lydia said. "It's a casserole that my mother used to make. Only with all of you, I had to make six of them." She laughed and opened the oven door a bit for Race's benefit. He grinned and nodded appreciatively.

"Dey look really good. So ya don't mind cleanin' up afta all of us?" he asked. "It ain't an easy job."

"No, I don't mind. You all aren't as messy as you claim. Would it ruin someone's image if I let it be known that he makes his bed every morning after everyone else is out of the bunkroom?" she asked.

"Naw, dat's jus' Specs for ya," Race said. "We all know he's neater than the rest of us. He took care of his younger brother for three years afta his parents died. He sorta got used ta bein' ma an' pa both."

"What happened to his brother?" Lydia asked, sure that the brother had died. It was just the way things worked.

"Nothin'. Dey both became newsies. Snipeshooter's his lil' brother."

"They do look sort of alike," Lydia mused, thinking back to which newsies they were. "When will everyone else be back?"

"Any time now. I jus' finished early, dat's all."

Almost as if they had been waiting for Race's cue, the newsies could be heard entering the Lodging House. Race sent Lydia a wink. "What'd I tell ya?" he asked and laughed as he left the kitchen to greet his friends.

Lydia watched the door he had exited for a long moment, a puzzled look on her face before she flushed slightly then bent over to pull the casseroles from the oven, feeling very torn.

For the next two months, Race would return early every day and he and Lydia would chat before all of the other newsies returned. He told her all about his family and what had happened to them and she told him all about her family and about Theo. It seemed as though her wounds were healing more quickly than she had thought they would. It helped to have work to do and friends to talk and spend time with. Or maybe it was just the company of one friend in particular. He even stopped going to the tracks as often. The other newsies wondered if this was the same Race who used to challenge them to a game of craps or poker every chance he got. Even unopportune moments like when they'd be in...say, court!

Mrs. Jacobs did return often and Lydia was very grateful to have her there. After three children of her own and after having delivered many more for the other tenents in her apartment building, she was like an expert to Lydia. While the guys were dear to Lydia, there were just some things they couldn't yet understand. Someday, when they had wives and families, they would better understand, but for now, they just viewed her as either a mother or a sister, depending on their ages.

One sunny, but still cold afternoon in early February, Racetrack entered the bunkroom to find Lydia standing at the window, preparing to pour out a heavy bucket of water. He rushed to her and took it from her, easily dumping the soapy water down the fire escape. Then he came back in, closing the window behind him and setting the bucket on the floor. He turned to Lydia.

"Why the hell were ya tryin' ta do dat by yourself?" he asked her, a little angry.

"I'm sorry!" she replied. "I didn't realize it would be that heavy. You don't have to yell at me."

Race softened and sighed. "I'm sorry I yelled, but ya jus' can't go 'round doin' ev'rything ya did 'fore," he told her. "Ya've gotta ease off a lil'. A lot, actually. Promise?"

"All right," Lydia agreed, her voice softer as well. "I promise. I suppose you're right." She sat down on her bunk underneath the window, propping her feet up on her pillow after removing her shoes. "My feet do hurt and my ankles have decided that they enjoy swelling up so that my shoes don't fit right anymore." She laughed a little, but Race could tell that her feet were truly bothering her.

Without saying another word, Race sat on the end of her bed and pulled her feet off of the pillow and onto his lap.

"What are you---" she began, but he cut her off.

"Shh, jus' rest. Ya deserve a break," he said.

She quit protesting, but kept her eyes open, watching him as he took one of her feet in his hands and began to massage it gently. Lydia sighed contentedly and Race smiled at her.

"Feel any betta?" he asked after a few minutes.

"Much," she replied.

The silence in the room grew heavier as Race began on her second foot and Lydia leaned back, closing her eyes. After another few minutes, she felt him stop and she sat back up as much as her figure allowed her to and opened her eyes only to find Racetrack staring at her, a peculiar expression on his face.

"How long has it been since someone told ya how pretty ya are?" Race asked her, quietly.

Lydia answered after only a second of hesitation. "A long time. It's not quite true, ya know. I've changed a little." She smiled a bit ruefully and glanced down briefly before looking up again.

"It is true," Race countered. "You're beautiful."

It should have felt odd for her to hear him say that. Theo had been the last to tell her so and she should have remembered that, right away, but hearing Race say it was like hearing it for the very first time. At the moment, she couldn't even recall what Theo's voice had sounded like, when he told her that. All she could think of now was what Race's voice saying those words had sounded like.

Race moved closer to her and his hand went to her cheek as they leaned towards one another. Just before their lips met, however, the baby kicked swiftly and Lydia jerked back with a small gasp of surprise.

"God Lydia, I'm sorry," he began quickly, mistaking her gasp.

"No, Race!" she cut in before he could continue with more apologies. "It was just the baby...Here, you can feel it kick," she offered.

"Uh, I don't know..." he said hesitantly.

"Go ahead." She took his hand and placed it on her stomach, just in time for the next kick. She laughed kindly at the look of shock that flashed across Race's face. He seemed speechless for several seconds. "Can't you say anything?" she asked him.

"I---I don't know what ta say," he said. "I've neva---dat's amazin'."

"I know," Lydia agreed. "Isn't it?"

"Ya know what?" he asked her, looking up at her. "So are you."

Lydia smiled again and this time their kiss was not interrupted.

To Be Continued.........................

Race now understood why Jack had been so concerned the first day Lydia had stayed at the Lodging House. It was a startling fact for him to comprehend, but he was in love with Lydia. She wasn't just a date, or just a brief interest. He really loved her. But telling her so was another story entirely. He knew that she had loved Theo very much and he wasn't sure if she was ready to hear that he loved her. He certainly wasn't sure if she would feel the same way. In fact, he doubted himself very much. He continued to come back early to talk with her and help her as much as he could. She wasn't working very much these days, but he helped her with whatever he could.

In the next two months, Mrs. Jacobs came by to visit often and she and Lydia would talk for awhile before Mrs. Jacobs had to get back to her family. Since that one day, Race hadn't ventured to kiss Lydia even once. He was embarrassed that he had done it in the first place, actually, and didn't want Lydia to know how much he loved her. The baby was due any day now and Race had to keep reminding himself that it was her child with Theo.

Race also didn't want to admit to anybody the not-so-nice things he thought about Lydia's late husband. He just simply didn't understand how anyone could leave her behind, even if he hadn't known about the baby when he jumped from the bridge. To Race, Lydia was the most wonderful woman in the world, and he couldn't imagine ever leaving her behind. He couldn't imagine his life without her, though he knew that someday, he would have to. Lydia wouldn't stay at the Lodging House forever. Most likely, when the baby was born, she would rest for awhile then move on, looking for a new job and a new place of residence. She would forget all about that single kiss he had given her.

But what Race didn't know was that Lydia knew she would never forget that day or that kiss. She realized too late that she loved Race and now there was just no talking herself out of it. It had been seven months since Theo had killed himself, but she already knew with whom she wanted to spend the rest of her life. The feelings scared her. She wondered what on earth Race would think if he knew. While she was his age, she figured that he saw her as though she was years older. After all, any day now, she would become a mother. She had responsibilities that the newsies hadn't yet even dreamed off and mentally, she was years older than they were.

Lydia also had doubts concerning Theo. She almost felt disloyal, loving someone else after he had only been dead a few months. But she couldn't help it and the more she tried to banish her feelings for Race, the more they grew.

Although he was scared out of his mind, Race decided one afternoon that he wouldn't be a coward, and so when he went back to the Lodging House early one afternoon, he marched right in to where Lydia was mending shirts. She looked up, confused, for he had marched in much louder than ususal.

"Race! What's gotten into you?" she demanded, still seated.

"I jus' hafta tell ya somethin', whether ya wanna hear it or not. I wasn't gonna say anything, but I can't let ya leave widout knowin' dat I love ya," he said, then walked out.

It took a full five seconds for Lydia to absorb this, then she hurried as much as she could, to the front door of the Lodging House, but Race had already gone.

It was well after ten o'clock that night when Race returned. He didn't venture in, though, and instead sat on the curb outside, watching as his cigar curled white smoke into the night sky, where it slowly disappeared.

"Real good, Race," he said quietly to himself. "Real good. Ya jus' HAD ta go an' say dat. Now she really will think you're stupid. 'Course, it's the truth. God, you're an idiot, ya know dat? She'll jus' leave as fast as she came an' you'll be the same newsie ya were 'fore, spendin' all you're money on horses down at the track. Ya haven't done dat in months, ya know. It's 'cause ya've been spendin' all your free time wid Lydia. Well, thanks ta your big mouth you'll 'ave plenty of free time ta spend at the races."

"There ya are!"

Race jumped, then turned to see Jack in the Lodging House door. "Oh, hey Jack," he replied glumly, expecting a simple answer. Instead, Jack grabbed his collar and half pulled him up. Race scrambled to his feet before Jack choked him.

"Hey! What's your problem?" he asked Jack angrily as he readjusted his vest.

"We've been lookin' all over for ya!" Jack exclaimed in reply. "I've got more'n half the guys out lookin' for ya."

"What for?"

"Lydia's 'avin' the baby an' she's been askin' for ya. Finally Mrs. Jacobs got us ta find ya." Jack told him and Race's eyes widened.

Without another word he handed Jack his cigar and dashed inside. Jack looked a little bewildered by the speed in which Race had dashed inside, then slowly looked at the still burning cigar he held in his hand and shrugged as he grinned. It was ironic, in a way. After all, aren't cigars what new fathers usually pass out? Chuckling to himself, Jack sat on the steps of the Lodging House to finish Race's cigar and to wonder just when it was that his friend had changed so much.

Kloppman informed Race that Lydia and Mrs. Jacobs were in his room, which was down the hall from the bunkroom and Race knocked softly on the door. A moment later Mrs. Jacobs opened the door a crack. When she saw Race standing there, she immediately ushered him in, then stepped out of the room, closing the door behind her. Lydia held her hand out to Race, who took it and knelt beside the bed.

"I'm sorry I said what I did." Race apologized softly, but Lydia shook her head.

"Don't be sorry. I've---I've wanted to hear you say that for---for I don't know how long!" she whispered back. "I was just shocked for a minute, that's all. I didn't expect you to ever say it."

"Ya've wanted me ta say dat?" he asked, incredulous and she nodded.

"I love you, Anthony Higgens," she said.

Race grinned somewhat. "Who told ya my name?" he asked.

"Jack did," she answered.

"Figures," Race muttered. "He always did 'ave a big mouth. It gets even worse when he decides ta climb statues." Then he realized what else she had said. "Ya love me?" he asked.

"Yes," she answered.

Before she could speak again, a sudden pain made her gasp and clutch Race's hand so hard he winced. But a moment later, the pain ebbed away and she looked once more at Race.

"I'm scared," she confessed in a small voice. "I haven't been this whole time, but I am now. I don't know if I can do this."

"Sure ya can," Race said without a moment's hesitation. "An' ya know what?" he asked.

"What?"

"You're gonna do it for Theo, okay?"

Lydia looked into his eyes for a long moment before she nodded. "It takes a very great and unselfish person to say that, Race."

He flushed slightly, but shrugged off the compliment.

Mrs. Jacobs entered then and gave Race a pointed look. He stood.

"Remember what I told ya, okay?" he asked and Lydia nodded, giving him a slight smile. He bent down long enough to kiss her forehead before he left the room.

It was another three hours before Mrs. Jacobs appeared at the top of the stairs. Some of the newsies had gone to bed already, but a few remained downstairs in the main room. Race had been nervously shuffling the same deck of cards over and over for the past hour and all the others had done was either watch him or doze off. When Mrs. Jacobs appeared, however, the cards were tossed aside and all sleeping newsies awoke.

"How's Lydia?" Race asked, the first one to speak.

Mrs. Jacobs grinned. "Lydia and her son are doing just fine," she answered. "Ya can go on up if ya want, Race," she added.

He didn't need to be told a second time. He hurried up the stairs, taking them two at a time, and entered the bedroom, closing the door behind him. Lydia rested back against the pillows, her face flushed and damp but her expression glowing.

"Oh Race, look at him!" she exclaimed softly. "He's so impossibly tiny!"

Race sat down gently on the side of the bed and looked down at the infant Lydia held in her arms. She was right. He WAS impossibly tiny. And adorable. Race reached out and let the baby grasp his finger before he spoke.

"So what'cha gonna name 'im?" Race asked. "Theodore?"

"That's his first name," Lydia said, "but his middle name's Anthony."

Racetrack tried not to appear as startled as he really was, but Lydia noticed anyway.

"Do you not like it?" she asked hesitantly and Racetrack slowly shook his head.

"I love it," he said quietly. He slipped an arm around Lydia's shoulders and contented, they watched as the baby drifted off to sleep. "I love YOU," Race said a moment later. "An' 'im," he added and Lydia smiled, wondering when she had ever been this happy.

Epilogue: Anthony "Racetrack" Higgens left the newsies three months later and married Lydia Adler a month after that. He also officially adopted Theodore Anthony and whenever a stranger coming up to them in Central Park or somewhere else, would comment that "his son" looked exactly like him, he and Lydia would just exchange a smile and thank them, never mentioning the truth.