A

'A' levels: exams taken at age 18

afters: dessert

aggro trouble; violence

Absobloodylutely: Couldn't agree more

Ace: The best

Airing cupboard:Small lobby usually where the central heating boiler is. often used for drying clothes

Aubergine:Egg Plant

At it:Making love

arse bottom, or ass

arse bandit a homosexual

arse over tit to fall head over heels

arse about playing around, being silly e.g. "stop arsing about!"

B

Bang on:Correct!

Bangers: Sausages

Bangers-n-Mash: Sausages and mashed potato

Bap:Bread bun

Bees Knees: Something really cool

Bloke: Man

Bog: Toilet

Bog roll: Toilet paper

Begging for it:Wanting Sex. Phrase usually used by men: "She's begging for it"...when of course, she wouldn't piss on him if he was burning to death

Bevvies: Drinks

Bird: Derogatory term for female

Birdie Song: Annoying song with a tune that gets stuck in your head. In the US it is called the Chicken Dance Dance

Blimey: Expression of surprise (Cor Blimey gov)

Branston Pickle: Vegetable Pickle (I hate it personally but my sister loves it)

Busking: Performing (usually music) on the streets hoping passers by will give them money

Bubble and Squeak: Fried potatoes with other vegetables

bumming a fag: requesting a cigarette e.g. "Can I bum a fag from you mate ?" Note: This has a VERY different meaning in the U.S.

Bugger all: Nothing

Bollock’s: Testicles

C

Cakehole: Mouth

Cardigan: Long woolen knitted garment

Cheers: Said when making a toast to something

Clear off: go away

Clicking: Finding you have something in common with another person

Codswallop: Nonsense

Conk: nose

Copper: Policeman

Crisps: (for all Americans reading) Potato Chips

Cuppa: cup of tea

D

Dead: very

Dogs Bollocks: Excellent

Dosh: Money

Double Decker: Twin level bus

Down in the dumps: Depressed

Dropped one : Farted

Dump: Finish a relationship

Dustbin: Garbage/refuse can

E

Ear'ole: ear

Effing and Blinding: using foul language

F

Fag: Cigarette (not a homosexual as in the US)

Fell off the back of the lorry: Stolen

Fiver: 5 pound note

Flat: Apartment

Flog: sell

Fly off the handle: Loose ones cool

Football: Soccer (again for American readers)

G

Geezer: Man

Get off with: Manage to attract, and date, a person of the opposite sex.

Get your kit off: Take your clothes off

Git: annoying person, usually and old annyoiny person (old git)

Giving the elbow: Rejecting

Gob: Spit

Grub: food

Gunk: Sticky unpleasant stuff

H

Had a few: Drunk

handy: useful, especially conveniently

hang about: pause or wait, in the sense of 'just wait a minute'

Happy as Larry: very contented

Having it off: having sex

Her Majesty: Queen Elizabeth II (In deference, an effort may be made not to drop the aitch)

Hold up: similar to hang about (qv)

Hooter: nose

How's yer father: (i) sexual activity (Often 'a bit of') (ii) a general 'to-do'

Hump: fed up (As in 'she's giving me the hump' = she's making me feel fed up)

Hob Nobs: Popular english buiscut (cookie)

Hooter: Nose

I

Innit: isn't it

J

Jammy: Lucky

Jaxie: Bottom

Jonnys: Condom

Joy Riding: Stealing cars and driving them around for fun

Jumper: Knitted garment warn on the upper body (Sweater)

K

Kazi: Toilet

Kick the bucket: Die

Kip: Sleep

Knacered: Very tired

Knob: Penis

Knockers: Breasts

L

Lada: Crap Russian car

Lift: Elevator

Living room: lounge

Loads: Lots, something you have in abundence

Losing your rag: Loosing your temper

M

Magic!: Wonderful

Mate: A good friend

Mantelpiece: Ornamental structure around a fire place

Mardy: In a bad mood, and letting other people know about it by complaining

Mitts: Hands

Mooning: Dropping ones pants and exposing ones ass to innoicent passers by. Considered funny by students and drunks.

N

Naff: Poor quality, Unfashionable

Nah!: No

Natter: Chat

Nick/knick: Take or steal

Nit Picking: Being Picky

Nosh: Food

Not half: Strong agreement

Nutter: Crazy Person (That man's a nutter)

O

Ogling: staring

On the Job: Having Sex

P

Pissed: Drunk

Pratt: A stupid person

Puff: Male Homosexual

Q

R

Randy: Horny, wanting sex

S

Shag: To have sex

Shacked up: Living with

Shandy: Mix of Beer and lemonade

Skid Marks: Brown smears found on underwear

Snog: Long french kiss

T

Tetchy: Irritable

Tights: Pantyhose

Tosser: Idiot, "Toss" slang for masturbation

Twat: a stupid person

U

V

W

Wanker: Idiot/slang for masturbation (male)

Wrecked: Very tired after a hard night smoking/drinking and working … depending on age

X

Y

Yank your plank: Masturbate (male)

Z

Zeds: Sleep