Where do I begin? I was an abused wife for over 10 years...yes, 10 long horrible years. With 4 children, my life was a living hell. I was beaten, and I lost a baby. I now have a seizure disorder. I felt worthless,like dirt, because I believed that I was, until one day, I was beaten so so badly. As my 7 year old son stood over me, (the rescue squad taking me to the hospital) crying and screaming......"Dont let my Mommy Die!!!"

     I tried to file for divorce, but my husband followed me when I left him. Everyone who helped me he got back at so I kept going back. The police were no help back in the early 80's. It is a domestic problem between a husband and wife, they told me. The restraining orders I had did no good. They were a joke, and he knew this. Not until that one night when I was beaten, with a broken jaw and broken ribs,hemoraging from losing a baby,and having to have an emergency hysterectomy, did I finally ask God for strength and help, for me and my children. It wasn't easy...it was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

     I went to counseling, court, and I pulled myself together. I went to college and became a nurse, but as strange as this all is, my husband and I were working on the marriage. He had gone to "Brother to Brother" for help. We were coming home from my sisters wedding,,and we were in a drunk driving accident, and my husband was killed. I suffer back injuries, but I am alive!!

     My advice to any woman who is getting abused, is to get out!!!!!!!!! No matter what! If it happens once, it will happen again, and again, and again.

     Today I have 4 wonderful children: Three sons, ages 22, 20, and 18, and a daughter 12, and 2 grandchildren, and I thank God that my sons are men, and respect women. There is help, so never ever be afraid to ask for it. You never know who was abused in life, from the outside, but we carry the scars on the inside. I am a survior!!!!!!!!! Thanks to God, my children, family and friends. Don't ever be afraid. I will never ever forget the look on my sons face at 7, (he is now 22), when he thought I was going to die, and he saw the abuse. It has to stop, before your children carry it on.

     I hope that this helps even just one woman out there to realize there is a way out!!!!!!!!

      This is the first time I am sharing this. It is very very hard, but if I can help just one woman, like I said, it is worth it.