Paralysing - from the very centre of one’s being
- was controlling 'fear’.
Inhibiting every thought & action,
it celebrated with tears.
Unrecognisable to the body,
which fought the only way it knew.
Battling a disease of the mind
with the immune ‘cleanup crew’.

Fear was also denied by the brain;
usually capable.
And the heart, beat double time
to outrun the inescapable.
The confident shell fooled everyone,
except her other half.
Whose attempts to gain access,
always lead to a side path.

Contributing factors were everywhere
but, not what is blamed.
For we are what we make ourself;
we control life’s game.
So, when it came down to basics
what was needed was a prod.
A helping hand to provide the tools;
albeit, most call God.

It came in the form of a proposed affirmation,
the mind wrote the words.
To be milked daily by the heart;
the pain created curds.
Weighed by the shock,
fact from fear was the separation
still, desire for completion was recognised;
creating needed inspiration.

Fasting - the internal journey
into reasoning - started.
With persistence the defeating mechanisms
of the past, departed.
A difficult journey fraught with
resurgence & occasional merit.
But, steadily rewarding day to day - 
a gift from the spirit.

If you came this far,