Interview With the Rovers
The content of this section was originally a part of Rover Rescue Site 11: Ross Island, Antarctica (which after not being updated since February 2002, was taken down in May 2003). When I discovered this particular site, I noticed a rather interesting section called "Interviews with the original Rovers", and I decided to check it out, out of curiosity. I found what is essentially what how the characters would respond to various questions (some by the webmaster Daniel Young, aka Mr. Chubbycheeks, some submitted by visitors like me). I decided to send a bunch of questions (indeed, Young sent me an email, effectively telling me to stop sending them in... you can check it out in the feedback section). You can check out the full "chats" by checking out my tribute to the site (link below). Here, however, are the answers to the questions I sent. What I think about some of the answers (which were probably done by the webmaster anyway) will be in italics.
Interviewed by: Mr. Chubbycheeks
Questions by: Varakorn Ungvichian

Q: What's your most futile effort in normal life?
A (Hunter): Well, you might not have guessed this, but I've always wanted to predict the future. And it seems like no matter how hard I try, I always miss something.
(The "gag" here is that one oft-used line of his is, "I would not have predicted this".)
A (Colleen): Right now my most futile effort would have to be thinking of something that's a futile effort for me. I do believe I've accomplished everything I ever set my mind to. Except Huntie, that is...
A (Exile): Reading contracts. Fine print always confuses me.
A (Blitz): Peppermint milkshakes. I find them sometimes but usually they're just not for sale. And when I ask for them, everyone thinks I'm a weird boy, even though I am not the one who was worried about eating hot dogs.
A (Shag, translated by Colleen): Rurih ruh rah raruh. Rih raruh rurh rah. [He says cooking with tap water. It never works right.]
(I sent this question as "What's your most futile effort?", expecting to get their least effective efforts from their missions. When I saw these answers... I decided to send a correction, and next are the answers to that.)


Q: What about an effort made in a mission that doesn't amount to anything?
A (Hunter): Oh. Okay, that's cool too... That would be when we were trying to recover the Sceptre of the Valley for Eisneria. We tried every trick in the book, but they just kept coming. If it hadn't been for the wolves, we would probably still be there. Or worse.
A (Colleen): Oh! Ahm...well, that would have to be the time I tried to get Shag to use his launcher. I finally got him to pull it out of his fur, but I hate to think what might have happened if I hadn't taken it from there. Shag's a good sort and a hell of a dancer, but sometimes he's not all together upstairs, if you know what I mean.
(Personally, I thought that he'd have put up the time with the laser deflector, see below, as her answer. Now that was 100% futile, if you ask me.)
A (Exile): Ah! Now I am seeing big picture. That would have to be when I tried to freeze the molten lava away from the cell when we were in Storm's base. If Muzzle had not been there to pull our bacon out of the fire, I would have gone blind, and we still would have been cooked like goose!
A (Blitz): That would have to be that time when I tried to trick the Groomer into letting me go so that I could save Colleen. I did my best, but she wouldn't believe me. Of course, Colleen chose that moment to remember me and ruined everything...
(Speaking of that, am I the only one who thinks Blitz should have gotten some action?... He'd already had enough time as the plucky comic relief by the time this happened. Why was he never the hero for once?)
A (Shag): Roh! Rah! Rurrih rah reh rirruh rah ruh ray rarrow row rurray. [He says, Oh! That! Putting his head in the sand to make Parvo go away.]

Q: Who are you grateful to the most?
A (Hunter): I'm most grateful to Shag, I think. Apart from his wonderful cooking, I'll never forget that one time that he caught me by the foot after my parachute broke. He is truly a dog's best friend.
A (Colleen): I'm definitely most grateful to Muzzle. He may be a totally unpredictable force of nature, but he always comes through in the end.
A (Exile): In all of the great big world I am the most grateful to Dr. Seuss. My favorite author. His works have inspired me to many great things.
(Exile has often been seen reading juvenile material, like "Go Dog Go" and "Highlights", a magazine for kids. Personally, I have a huge stash of that particular magazine, but that's beside the point.)
A (Blitz): I am most grateful to whoever invented tukuses. They are so soft and squishy and good to bite. Whoever invented them is my hero.
A (Shag): Rah rurrah rorray. [He says the Frugal Gourmet.]

Q: How does it feel to help a blind boy see again?
A (Hunter): It's the best feeling a dog ever had.
A (Colleen): It's one of those wonderful feelings of accomplishment and purpose that make being a Road Rover worth while.
A (Exile): Warm. Sweaty. Large. Like always!
A (Blitz): It's a very warm and fuzzy kind of feeling. Of course, all the best feelings are.
A (Shag): Rah rerih row rih ruh ruhd run. [He says, as feelings go, it's a good one.]

Q: How does it feel to help prisoners out of a boot camp which had never had anyone breakout alive?
A (Hunter): It's the second-best feeling a dog ever had.
A (Colleen): Well, I don't mean to brag or anything, but I'd have to say that's the kind of feeling that most folks just plain never have. All part of the job...
A (Exile): It felt pretty good. But very warm. That's probably because we blew the place up after we left.
A (Blitz): That is the best feeling ever! To be the first dog ever to do a thing like that makes you feel like they're throwing a parade in your honor and letting you start at the back and bite all the tooshies!
A (Shag):Ririy ruhd ruh rah rirruh ritchy. [He says, pretty good but a little itchy.]


Q: Were you surprised that wolves helped in the retrieval of the valley sceptre?
A (Hunter): Well, I can't say I was surprised exactly. I mean, the sceptre did have a wolf head, so I figured they were involved somehow. But I must compliment them on their keen sense of timing.
A (Colleen): Well, I must admit, after that run-in with the werewolves in London I wasn't too sure that wolves would want to help us, but I took a chance on that one that was shot, and it sure paid off.
A (Exile): Of course not. My people have worked with wolves for as long as anyone can remember.
A (Blitz): I am never surprised by anything. I am always prepared. Even that time when we had the little dog with us to testify, I wasn't surprised when he betrayed us! Nothing surprises me.
A (Shag):Ruh rorse rot. Reh rurrah rahr ride. [He says, Of course not. They were on our side.]


Q: Were you surprised that you saved Master's life when you went back in time?
A (Hunter): Well, I have to admit I was a little surprised by that. But then, after Blitz, I'm the easiest one to surprise. Ask Colleen.
A (Colleen): Well, I've always known that Shag had a way with words, but I didn't know he had such impeccable timing, that's for bloomin' sure.
A (Exile): Of course not! We always win! Besides, if we hadn't saved Master, he couldn't have pulled us back to the present!
A (Blitz): Okay, well maybe I was a little surprised then, but only just a little. Honest.
A (Exile): Row. Rah roo ruh rail ruhd reh roo. [He says, No. I knew the mail would get through.]


Q: Does luck play a significant role in your missions?
A (Hunter): Well, being super-super-lucky has saved my tail a few times, but I certainly wouldn't say it's the most important factor.
A (Colleen): Well, we've been lucky a bit now and then, but I think it's more than that. I mean, when you save the world once, that's luck. But when you do it on an everyday basis, you gotta figure it's fate or something. Luck runs out eventually...
A (Exile): Luck is just a matter of being in right place at right time and having Hunter along. He is super lucky, you know.
A (Blitz): No way. It's all skill and prowess due to our incredible abilities. Luck has nothing to do with it at all.
A (Shag): Rye resh row. [He says, I guess so.]


Q: Does timing play a significant role in your missions?
A (Hunter): It certainly helped the wolves, so I'd have to say...yeah!
A (Colleen): Well, of course! Haven't you ever noticed that anything we do in the last five minutes always works? That's timing, right there!
A (Exile): Timing is for comedy. We have a lot of comedy. So I guess so.
A (Blitz): Timing? Oh, ya... That's one of the skills I was talking about just now.
A (Shag): Reah! Rih rou rah ruh royruh rarruh ruh rooh, rih ruah rarryring! [He says, yeah! If you add the toilet water too soon, it ruins everything!]


Q: How does your uniform feel?
A (Hunter): It gets warm when I use my Super Speed. But it's flame retardant, so that's okay.
A (Colleen): Well, it's a bit snug here and there, but at least there's room for me tail...all in all I'd say it's comfy enough.
A (Exile): It itches like crazy! But it keeps us safe from bruises and laser beams.
A (Blitz): It feels hard and tough, just like me...
(I originally refered to it as their "armor", given its shiny look, as you can see at the link above. I changed it here since I decided that the comments would still apply if I used the word "uniform"... then again, Blitz's and Exile's comments would probably make more sense with the term "armor"...)


Q: What did you feel when you went quite fast in the Street Rover?
A (Hunter): I dunno. It all happened so fast that by the time I realized it was happening, it was over. Ask Colleen.
A (Colleen): I don't know. It all happened so fast that I blinked and missed it altogether. Ask Huntie.
(I sort of digress with Hunter's answer... otherwise, how could he have said "Too cool"? I can understand Colleen's answer though...)


Q: Any comments on your laser deflector?
A (Colleen): Well, it worked better than I thought, but it almost didn't matter once that other dog ran out ahead of us...
(This was a scene from the ep with the boot camp, Hunter's Heroes. More recently, I cited this scene in a post called "What was the (plot) point?" about things that ended up not mattering any bit to the plot. Most of the replies related to an ep of The Simpsons I mentioned in the post as well.)


Q: Blitz says you chose a bad time to remember him. Any comment on that?
A (Colleen): Who?
(In light of Blitz's reply to "most futile effort in a mission", I asked Colleen this, and I groaned when I saw this answer. And with good reason too... in the original email to Chubbycheeks, I'd carefully phrased my question to avoid the exact answer shown above, by referring to him as, if I remember correctly, "the Doberman" or "Blister", since Colleen's supposedly not good with remembering names when it comes to Blitz, and, I guess Chubbycheeks couldn't come up with a good answer if she were asked just like that, so... here's a rather predictable answer instead. Not funny, Chubby!)


Q: What are your most pleasant and unpleasant experiences as a Rover?
A (Hunter): Well, by now I've seen it all and done it all, but when we were first getting started, everything was new and made big impressions. Like when we fooled those Canomutants into taking the wrong box to Parvo...THAT was COOL! I think the most unpleasant time was right before Muzzle saved us in Storm's base. There's something about lava that's really unpleasant.
A (Colleen): Well, I'd have to say the most unpleasant part was having a werewolf drool all over me hair. As for the most pleasant... well, there was this certain walk on the beach at moonlight... although even that could've been better.
A (Exile): As a Rover, my most unpleasant experience was being chained to a seat on the Sky Rover while wondering when I would turn into a Werewolf and eat my chumskies. But the most pleasant thing was when I found out I was okay.
A (Blitz): My most pleasant experience is biting tooshies. I get to bite a lot of tooshies in this job, and that is the most pleasant part. The most unpleasant part is that everyone is always shooting at me.
A (Shag): A: Rurrih rehrruh rah ruh rooruh rerrut. [He says, cooking breakfast and the groomer's haircut.]


Q: What were the high and low points of your first mission?
A (Hunter): Well, I just talked about the high point. The low point had to be... hmm... I don't really remember a low point. That mission went pretty well.
A (Colleen): Well, the lowest point for me was when I thought Huntie had given those Canomutants the little red box. But the high point was when I found out he'd pulled the ol' switcheroo.
A (Exile): High point was putting Canomutants in Siberian Deep Freeze. Low point was when they broke out. The rest was pretty much in between.
A (Blitz): The highest point was when the Master gave us all a place to live. But the low point was when he said we had to stay off the sofa.
A (Shag): Reh rirrah rowrur rah reh rirrarred. [He says when it was over and when it started. ]


That's all the questions I asked the Rovers. If you want to check out what else was asked to the Rovers, click here for my tribute to Ross Island, Antarctica.