Conscientious Citizen Turns Over Self, PC, After "Perform(ing) Illegal Operation."

Sandusky, Ohio-48 year old Melvin LeGrange turned himself and his Dell laptop in to local authorities after LeGrange's operating system informed him that he, through his PC, had "performed an illegal operation." "I was writing a letter to my sister in Indiana on MS Word 98," said LeGrange from his holding cell at the Sandusky PD. "I was about to write to her that my corns were acting up again and I got this 'illegal operation' window. Next thing I knew, I was booted from the program and was staring at my program manager. So, I turned myself in."

"Our best guess," speculated Sandusky police spokesman John Mickels, "is that he may've used 'I' before 'E' but not after 'C'. This kind of white collar crime is beyond us, so we've called in the FBI's top computer encryption analyst to examine his files. Believe me, since LeGrange feels guilty enough to turn himself in, then he must have done something. We'll book him on something before the 24 hour holding period is up, trust me. Look at him, though. You'd never figure a nerd like that as a criminal."

Police departments across the country have been reporting holding cells swelled to capacity since Microsoft released Windows 98 last year.

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