SISDELS GROOVE - Levi's Fuse 99 Tour

Susan, Marsha and I were selected by some committee of people over at Levi's who no doubt took pity on our pathetic video submission to them to be Levi's Fuse Heads. Two days after being notified of our selection we were flown to Los Angeles for an extra large serving of media training. This should have been an indication to us that we actually had a "job" to do for this whole thing. We were having too much fun at that point so we happily signed the agreement to do whatever they told us for the next millennium or two.

Everything really began on August 17 when we flew to Detroit to actually join the Levi's Fuse Tour. Fastball, Sugar Ray, and the Goo Goo Dolls were the main attractions of the tour, which also involved an emerging artist stage with acts such as FrogPond and Buck Jones. We hit Detroit with eager anticipation of what awaited us.

Jenn and Jennifer from Ketchum, the Levi's promotional team, awaited us with more media selling points and the news that we would need to be at FOX News Live for a TV interview at around 7AM the following morning. I kept reminding myself it was for PAX. Take one for the cause. That made me feel way better about it. We also finally got to see the Fuse Box which was a huge red bus painted with Levi's logos. It had 5 TV's, a sweet sound system, denim covered couches, and most importantly - lots of snacks and toys.

Detroit wasn't a happening town so I got plenty of sleep before our butt crack of dawn arrival at the station the next day. There was no intro to what was going to happen and the news anchor decided we would start outside the bus and move inside as the cameraman was counting down the final seconds to air. Good thing I'm a better public speaker when I'm working spontaneously. Call me crazy but I enjoyed the whole camera in my face thing. I was talking on and on about the tour like I had known this guy all my life and like I actually knew what was going on even though I had not even attended a show yet. Overall, I was pleased with the results. Although I haven't seen the tape yet so I may not be so happy with my extra 10 lbs.

We drove the Fuse Box to a deserted parking lot that evening to pick up our first set of radio contest winners. What a group of individuals this was. High school students, a father/son combo, two stoners, a Dennis Leary look alike, and some random old people. We entertained them to the best of our ability until we arrived at Pine Knob Theatre and they made their entrance to the show. We stayed on the outside of the venue soliciting signatures on the denim mural which we set up by the bus. The plan was that for all the signatures we got on the board, Levi's would donate money to PAX, the anti-violence organization.

It felt good to be a part of something useful and beneficial especially when people knew more about PAX than we were able to tell them. A lot of them were very informed and supportive of the PAX sponsored gun safety educational programs.

We had prime seats for this show when we finally got in. 4th row. Kid Rock came out during Sugar Ray's set to throw down a little freestyle for us. People love this guy about as much as they love Mark McGrath. Combine the two of them on one stage and you have a mass of screaming women. The performance was so high energy. The boys of Sugar Ray put together a great mix of songs from "Lemonade and Brownies" (including my favorite Iron Mic), "Floored", and their latest release "14:59". They have amassed a nice little collection of songs for themselves. I was impressed. They even have their own bartender complete with tiki hut on stage. You know you've become a star when you've got your own tiki hut.

The Goo's were up next and the thing that stands out most about their performance is Nathan. You're probably thinking, "Who is Nathan?" He is the hired guitar player that is performing in the shadow of the Goo's on this tour. He looks interesting and adds a lot of flavor to the set. I also recall that Johnny Reznik was wearing capri pants and totally pulling it off. It was a nice look for him. The audience at this show knew every single song. I would come to find this same phenomenon in every city they played in. The Goo's are bringing the world together with their music. They support PAX. They're cute. There has to be something wrong with them.

We collected our contest winners at the end of the show and returned for another night to the ghost town that surrounded us in Detroit. Making our way into the lobby the next morning to check out we ran smack into Fastball. They are so nice! Not sugar coated trying to be nice, but really nice without trying at all. I'm happy that we got the chance to meet them then because we didn't see them or their show for the rest of the tour. We also ran into a shirtless, homeless guy on the street which sent me rummaging in my bags for my Fuse Head t-shirt. I told him it was from Sugar Ray and he seemed happy with it.

Hopping a flight soon after the Fastball incident, we ended up in New York City. What a city. You can do everything and nothing all at the same time and no one really cares. No matter how many times I visit I'm always in awe of the largeness of the place. It's just big. We relaxed most of the evening (drinking wine at a sushi restaurant) and got up early the next morning to do a radio interview with New Jersey's 94.3. Radio is better on the body because you can do it from bed and you can immediately go back to sleep. I again was thrilled with my little rush of media.

We went out for hardcore shopping when we finally dragged ourselves out of bed. I bought some cool vinyl pants and some really cute shoes. I saw too much stuff that I wanted to bring back with me but due to space limitations I didn't want to kill myself getting back to SC with it all.

We didn't have any contest winners to pick up for the Jones Beach show that night. It was just us, the people from Ketchum, and Manny "the man" (our forever fearless driver). By the time we arrived at the venue a whole movie later, it was pouring rain. Knowing that we had 4 more shows to attend and not being appropriately dressed for the occasion forced our decision to hang out on the Fuse Box. We used the sound system and mic to perform our very own show right there which entertained everyone that was coming on and off the bus being miserable from the rain.

Twenty minutes before the end of the show it stopped raining and following the motto that "the show must go on!" we made our exit from the bus to see what was left of the Goo's. People were annoyed that our hair was still fresh. Using our powers of persuasion we convinced the security that we were Levi's VIP without a stitch of credentials. We got to see the show from the side area which was only separated from the stage by water. This venue is so cool. I've never seen a stage sitting in water before.

Again people sang along in harmony to the Goo's. I'm concerned that this is some sort of Stepford clan. It's kind of eerie. It was cold out still so we left immediately following their performance and slept all the way back to the hotel bundled up in whatever we could find handy. We had directions to Soho for the next morning so we didn't waste any time getting to bed.

In the AM we stumbled upon Au Bon Pain. This is perhaps the mecca of all restaurants. I could eat there for the rest of my life with no regrets. This being largely due to my recent infatuation with Chicken Caesar Salads and the fact that they have this in a sandwich wrap. I think throughout all the cities we visited I ended up devouring about 5 of these things. (Was that 10 lbs. extra on camera or 20?) I just can't help myself.

Soho was more than I could have hoped for. I bought more vinyl pants except I went for a nice snake print pattern this time. We spent hours wandering and browsing but still needed more time. Our aching feet forced us into heading back to the hotel. We needed to find something to do on our final night there and decided the Village Voice could help us out. I was surprised to see that Tribal Groove, a band that had sent me a submission for our magazine last year was playing at Le Bar Bat. Not sure if they would remember me or not I called them at the club anyway. Sule and the rest of the band happily invited us out saving us the $60 cover charge it would have cost the three of us to get in. They are so cool!

Le Bar Bat was a nice club but seemed to cater to an older crowd. Tribal Groove was forced by the owner to play a lot of cover songs but at least they were kicking them with style. Their Seal cover sounded better than Seal himself. This was definitely a memorable evening and one of the highlights of the trip.

On Sunday we picked up more contest winners and went out to the NJ show. Amazingly, it took us less time to get to the NJ show than it did for the NY Jones Beach Show. What's up with that? We had some really nice contest winners this time and they had the party spirit going on the bus. We all got VIP wristbands to use at the Levi's tent for food, frosty beverages, and whatever else we could talk them out of.

There was a mad rush to get off the bus and make our way to Sugar Ray's meet and greet when we arrived at the venue. We've met tons of "stars" before, but never at a meet and greet. Just the phrase makes me cringe. Not knowing what to expect we stood in line chatting while the abundance of women around us screamed, cried, and cheered trying to get Mark to look up. I was in mid-conversation by the time it was my turn to walk down the good old meet and greet line. Someone gave me a shove in the right direction cutting me off and leaving me standing in front of Murphy. I think one of us said hi. He offered to sign the sticker on my pants. I hesitated for a while before agreeing since I didn't want to be rude. I don't know what proper meet and greet etiquette is. Rodney was the next guy I ran across. I'm not even sure we greeted each other and then Mark, who was next to him, was making some comment about us being the Fuse Heads. He shook my hand and said he would come visit our bus. Knowing this would never happen because it would probably incite a riot of huge proportions I nodded and moved on to Stan. He glanced up and said "Greetings" in a monotone little voice. I commented that he shouldn't do that anymore because it made him sound like a Klingon. I'm not sure if he laughed at that or not. Craig was last and I told him about the awful photo I have of the two of us at the 311 show where we both look trashed even though we weren't. He volunteered to take another one with me later that night. I kind of like the trashed one. It has character so I didn't follow him up on the offer. I exited the meet and greet platform while Susan and Marsha finished making their way down the line. I see another signature on my sticker but I'm not sure who it came from. This experience was pretty lame. Not because the guys are lame (I don't know if they are or not) but because we don't know each other from jack and to just stand there like a big dork isn't very appealing to me.

We were being followed by Victor, Sugar Ray's video director, as we were leaving the meet and greet. I decided if he wanted to film us we should just perform for him. "The scent of danger takes me to the edge of panic…" was what we started to sing doing our best 2 Skinnee J's impression. It was quite loud. People stopped to stare and Victor was completely amused. He likes the J's as much as we do.

After soliciting for PAX, we were told that we would be doing a Goo Goo Dolls meet and greet. Two in one night. What a treat. I decided to make this one a little more fun than the last. The basis for this one was also a little different. Sugar Ray was more like shake, sign, move and the Goo's were more like snap, click, move. They would only do photos which are probably more interesting than an autograph anyway. We waited in line again making lots of noise and anarchy. When it was finally our turn I marched straight up to Johnny Reznik and berated him for copping my hairstyle. He agreed that I probably had it first. I knew he would see it my way. As we were getting into position for the photo I asked Johnny and the drummer guy where the other guy was. They bounced the question "What other guy?" back and forth a few times smiling. Then asked "Which guy?" I said "Nathan." I had struck a nerve. Johnny said, "He is not a member of the band. The Goo's are a threesome." Touchy aren't we? So this is what I determined from my previous statement was wrong with them. They didn't want to give Nathan any credit. I was bothered by this and on a mission to make Nathan feel good for the rest of the tour.

Sugar Ray was again high energy and even though our seats were awful we ended up 4th row again. Just look down angrily like you're in a hurry and people won't stop you. They think you're late for the show and wanting to get to your seats. We met Sean, the amazingly talented Sugar Ray bartender and merchandise guy, after the set. He asked if we would like to come hang out on the band's bus or stay and watch the Goo's. We opted for the bus and the lure of free alcohol. Random members of Sugar Ray showed up while we were hanging out drinking their beer and listening to Rancid on their very nice sound system. Murphy was watching Varsity Blues, but I think Craig was attempting to find something more explicit. We helped ourselves to some really excellent cupcakes that one of their fans had given to them earlier. Our fun came to an abrupt halt when we realized the Goo's set was over and we had to go back to our bus to make the trip back to the Helmsley in NY.

Sean and Victor thought it would be a good idea to walk us back and liven things up a little on the Fuse Box. I fell onto the pavement at some point walking back and then ended up on the hood of a Lexus whose driver was not happy with me. I've heard before that Sugar Ray always teaches people that "life is all about drinking". This is oh so true. We took that bus by storm. The contest winners were quite surprised to see us show up and having Sean carrying a big huge bottle of rum sort of added to the effect. Kristy from Ketchum (who had been reminding us of our "jobs" all day long) hurriedly kicked them off and scolded us for showing up in "our conditions". So we've gone from contest winners to employees in a blink. I'm not sure I understand this theory at all.

We left NY to drive to DC the next day and I was in pain. That was the longest bus ride ever. We slept the entire time because we knew we had a big night coming up again. We arrived at the hotel with only an hour to get ready for the Jimmie's Chicken Shack CD release party. Their manager, Richard, had put us on the guest list at the 8x10 which was unfortunately all the way in Baltimore. Determined to get there we got ourselves a taxi and a flat rate of $50 for a one way trip. Good thing we got that flat rate. The guy ignored my directions saying he knew the back way. We arrived in Baltimore 1.5 hours later and he finally admitted he was lost and knew nothing about the area. He was about to drive me to drink (as if I need much encouragement). We asked about 5 other cabs how to get there and finally made it to the club.

There was an eclectic band called Underfoot playing when we arrived and Susan was immediately infatuated with the singer who was wearing only a Buddhist skirt. Their music was deep and emphatic. We liked it a lot. I was on a mission to find Richard though since I had never had the opportunity to meet him after months of e-mailing. Susan and Marsha spotted some guy that they were sure was him so I walked over and said "Richard?" His face lit up and he threw his arms around me. I was going on about how nice it was to finally meet him and his hands started drifting. I was being thoroughly groped as he told me how drunk he was. The Richard I know doesn't drink. When I said this he just groped more and determined that we had at some point made love even though he didn't remember it. I was completely frightened of this guy so I managed to get out of his death grip and maneuver away from him.

Susan and Marsha were having a good laugh at my incident. Now I was even more determined to find the real Richard so I began to wander through the club dragging Susan with me. I ran into Jimi Haha and asked where Richard was. If anyone knew, he would know. "Richard Burgess?" he asks looking at me kind of confused since I hadn't exactly introduced myself. Just as he was about to answer my question he was intercepted by two girls who dragged him off in another direction. Doorman was the next resort. He hadn't seen him. He walked to the entrance and said, "Oh, there he is…." Finally, I get to meet Richard. He didn't grope me, he was really nice, and his wife Connie was very cool. They told me that the other groping guy was a White House employee who ironically is named Richard also. How strange is that??

The Jimmie's Chicken Shack performance was nothing less than incredible. They did a nice mix of stuff from Pushing the Salmonella Envelope and their brand new release, Bring Your Own Stereo. They are so happy and carefree. I just love them. They're adorable. Why weren't they on the Levi's Fuse Tour? Our dilemma came after the show when we didn't really have a way back to the hotel in Washington. Taxi riding was definitely out after that last scenario. Taking pity on us, Richard and Connie took the band's van and drove us all the way back. They're so sweet!

We spent the following morning shopping around DC. It's just not Soho. I didn't buy a thing. We had to meet the next set of contest winners at 4 that afternoon at Tower Records. We took a different approach to these people by splitting up on the bus and each focusing on a select few winners to make sure they were thoroughly entertained. I got the cutest little high school boy named Karl and his sister. They liked a lot of the same music I'm into and I was really pleased that I ended up with them to entertain.

The rest of this night is kind of a blur in my memory right now, but I'll try to recapture it. I know we had meet and greet stuff with the Goo's again and we positioned ourselves at the end of the line trying to avoid the inevitable uncomfortableness of snap, click, move. Sean who was about ready to get to work in his tiki hut rescued us. We bypassed the Goo's photo line and he brought us side stage where we parked ourselves for the Sugar Ray set. He kept us stocked with frosty daiquiris the entire time and the really nice keyboard player from the Goo's took a zillion photos for us. This was fun.

Afterwards we were kicked off the stage and headed out to the band's catering tent. Here we ran into Stan, the drummer of Sugar Ray, and his friend Mark (not McGrath). Stan's clothes were really jacked up and since I had already made the Klingon comment to him in our first meeting I had no problem telling him this. He says, "Who are you??? I've seen you like 10 times now." He agreed that his shirt was jacked up and we fixed it. He is by far the most interesting of the band members I met on this trip. I could make fun of him all day and he would enjoy it. Sean put on some Cuban music for us as we hung out drinking more of Sugar Ray's bus stock and dancing. Salsa, mambo, whatever it was - we weren't good at it, but we tried.

Mark (the real McGrath) showed up sometime during the evening and had what I would call an LSS (lead singer syndrome) tantrum. We took our party back outside. I finally ran into Nathan and as many drinks as I had all I could think to say to him was "You get no credit Nathan! They don't give you any credit." I'm not sure how many times I said this but Stan was urging me to shut-up because I was making him feel worse, not better. I was trying to help but it came out all wrong. I took a photo with him in hopes of making up for it. I would never usually solicit photos like this but I felt I owed it to him for being so insensitive.

I went out to the side of the stage again for some of the Goo's set, but Sean wasn't there to keep me out of trouble this time. I ran into Stan again and we talked about how good Nathan is. I really like Stan. He had to leave after a few minutes which left me there credential-less and being eyed by some hefty security guard. I was kicked out soon after I shifted some equipment around to take photos. I'm not sure what I was aiming at. I was pretty much gone at this point so I didn't care about being kicked.

We convinced Stan to come back to our bus after the show as a special surprise to the contest winners. We made it about half way there and as soon as we left the secure area, about 10 girls who were hanging out awaiting an opportunity just like this mobbed him. I tried to help him by taking photos for some of them and he was really sweet answering all of their many lame questions. By the time we finished up we were already late getting back to the bus and he was trying to get directions for his friend Mark to get home. We had to go our separate ways but he left a good impression on me.

We began the drive to Philly immediately after the show that evening. I love that bus, but after a while it can get old. It wasn't meant to be a hotel on wheels. When we arrived in Philly it was like 4AM and we began to wander aimlessly about the hotel in our pajamas searching for snacks. People thought we were strange. Jared, the other Ketchum guy, took us out for Philly Cheesesteaks the next afternoon which was way cool of him. We didn't get to see any of Philly because we had to go pick up some contest winners again.

This time we met at a place called Dave and Busters on the water that I kept referring to as Beever and Busters for some reason. When our bus stopped to drop us off a car came to a screeching halt in front of us as two screaming little teenage girls jumped out from the back seat. They were yelling, "Who's on that bus? Is it Sugar Ray? Is Mark McGrath here?" Marsha blankly says, "Who? Mark McGrath?" Just her saying his name was enough to send them into a crying frenzy as they ran towards the door. Manny, our fearless driver, pulled off just in time and they began to chase Marsha down the street grabbing at her. It was a scary experience.

These winners were pretty dull and luckily it didn't take us too long to reach the venue. It was rainy out and although we weren't motivated to do PAX, the nice people of Philly got us into it because they were very interested in what we were doing. We probably got more signatures here than any other city. We were right next to the radio station's booth and we all did a live interview after we filled the PAX board. It was cool to have people listening to us make fools of ourselves and my friend Kevin said he heard me on his way to the venue.

We spent most of the time after this in the VIP tent due to the weather and the fact that our tickets got really screwed up. Sean found us and entertained us with road stories for a while. We walked through the crowd during the Goo's set and everyone was looking straight ahead singing with everything they had. Johnny Reznik has cast some sort of spell over these people. It was insane to see them all doing it in unison over and over every night.

We decided to maximize our time in Boston by leaving directly after the Philly show. As we were tossing our stuff in the suitcases back at the hotel, our friends Squid and Slap from the NCThirteens came by to visit. It wasn't cool that we only got to see them for a few minutes but they brought me a t-shirt and some posters anyway. After their brief tour of the bus, we headed out for Boston. We arrived in Boston sometime the next day and they were not prepared for the tragic sight of us running around in those ugly slept in clothes breathing funky morning breath on them.

We slept for a long time before hooking up with Sean that night to go exploring in downtown Boston. We found a TGI Friday's for food, drinks, and fine family fun. After this we went off in search of clubs. Marsha likes to dance. Sean and I like punk/hardcore/heavy music. Susan didn't really care. We saw 3 random guys getting out of a car so Marsha and I somehow talked them into piggybacking us down the street. Why should we walk when we can be carried? They showed us where all the clubs were. We saw Axis first and Marsha immediately wanted to go in. Bill's Place next door was calling me because it was hosting 3 live punk bands. Sean and Susan opted to go with me and two of the random guys followed us.

We saw the Pug Uglies, somebody I don't remember, and the Ducky Boys. I took photos, got hit by some crazy punk moshers, and had a really great time. After the show we met Marsha at Axis and proceeded to dance to the really loud annoying techno music. I wasn't as at home in this place as I was at Bill's. Bill's was the comfort zone for me.

Susan had to leave early the next morning due to class requirements on Saturday. This left Marsha and I to roam Boston and then fend for ourselves with the contest winners on the bus that night. We were also joined by about 50 of Jared's closest friends (just think Boston frat boys to get an idea of what we had to endure).

Jared left us outside with the PAX board at the Tweeter Center until two songs into Sugar Ray's set. Not happy. As much as I wanted to do something good, I didn't want to be out there missing my last show of the tour. We finally got in and grabbed some food, but ended up missing almost all of Sugar Ray. Mark did give a plug to the Ducky Boys on stage because he knew we had gone to see them the night before. We ran past security down front after they finished to get Sean who passed us some frosty beverages. We met up a few minutes later and wandered around the venue. We were all pretty bored so Marsha and I decided to go watch the Goo's. I think it was at this point I realized how much I like their music. I had been in denial for the whole trip acting like I could do without them when the real truth is that I love those stinking radio songs. I became a member of the Stepford clan singing along and looking straight ahead (at Nathan). I knew after this that I was going to miss the tour when I went home.

We made our way back to SC the next day and my luggage arrived about 3 days later. I am constantly hearing the Goo's and Sugar Ray on the radio. I can't escape them and I'm not even sure I want to. We even planned on going up to Charlotte to catch another of their shows but decided against it. I'm going to the mall instead to buy Dizzy Up the Girl. I'm sick, but I've definitely been converted and I'm not ashamed to admit it. I can't say being a Fuse Head was everything I expected it to be, but we had lots of fun traveling and entertaining ourselves at other's expenses.