True North

        He wanted a drink and that was for damn sure.  No, it 
wasn't just a want, it was a need...a deep craving gnawing at 
the center of his gut.  Not that it was something he was 
entirely unfamiliar with, but tonight...tonight, he wondered 
if he would be capable of handling it. 
        A wry smile played at the corner of Leo McGarry's 
lips as he thought about all the people who wondered the 
same thing today, of all the people who asked him if he was
all right. What else could he say? That his wife was
wanting a divorce and he wanted to drink himself into
oblivion? After the near fiasco with the valium addiction
hitting the news, there was no way in hell Leo was going
to even hint at 'that'.
        So instead he stoically and quietly relieved everyone
of their fears he was tipping on the edge of the wagon, 
assured them he was strong enough not to give in to old 
desires. Only problem was he failed to convince himself. 
        No, actually that wasn't true...he 'had' convinced 
himself. After all, had it really come as 'that' big of
a surprise that Jenny had wanted to end their marriage?
Being honest with himself, Leo knew the answer to that
was no. They had been separated for months but their 
marriage had been over long before that. The emotional
separation had started when? Probably during the campaign
if not before. Then it was only inevitable that the
intimacy started to wane. Being served the divorce papers
was only the unavoidable outcome of situation set into
motion years ago. 
        So it had been relatively easy to tell everyone he was
just fine to the point he was actually believing it himself.
Hell, he even made it as far to make it out of his office,
into his car, and on the road to the motel he had been staying
at. So why now did he find it so damn difficult to make the
last few steps? Why was he sitting in his car at the motel
parking lot in the middle of a torrential rainstorm unable
to find the strength to get out of the car? He looked over
to the passenger seat where he'd thrown the ominous looking
manila envelope that had come from Jenny's lawyer's office.
He found himself staring at it like it was going to come
alive or some such nonsense. How was it that several
pieces of paper had the ability to take away something he
had once held so dear? It just didn't seem possible.
        Pulling his gaze to look at the reflection in the
rearview mirror, he looked into dull eyes he barely
recognized as his own. He looked older than his fifty-
five years and felt even older. 'God, Jenny, I really 
screwed myself up this time, didn't I?' Sighing heavily, 
Leo ran his palms over his weary looking features and through 
his thinning pale hair. 
        Swinging his eyes towards the nondescript weather-beaten
door to the room he'd been staying at for the last couple
of months, he was suddenly filled with an overwhelming 
emptiness in his guts that crept up and squeezed around
his heart so tightly he gasped for breath. He swallowed
down the sob that was lodged in his throat, threatening
to choke him. 
        Sometimes in 'Nam he'd gotten to feeling close to
this. The only thing that seemed to help was sweet nirvana
contained in a bottle. The deliciously bitter liquid that
promised a reprieve at the bottom of a glass. It was
like a siren's call, the amber whisky whispering promises
of the palpable numbness it could offer, a soothing balm
for his soul. With the whisky, there was no pain, no
aching in his heart, no regrets and no guilt. Whisky 
didn't judge him.
        Leo closed his eyes and let his head fall against
his hands still on the steering wheel. 'Shit, I have to
do something about this and now,' he told himself. But
what? He didn't know the answer to that, all he knew
for sure was he couldn't go in that motel room. If he
did, he was going to fall and no one was going to be able 
to catch him. He wouldn't be able to save himself.
        Lifting his head, Leo jammed the key back into the
ignition and started the car. As he pulled away, he didn't
know where he was headed, he knew he just had to drive.
The curtain of rain was parted with the steady, quiet,
swish of the wiper blades. The neon sign of the motel
glowed softly in the distance until it slowly disappeared.

****

        Jed Bartlet knew he should be sleeping. He was tired 
but he couldn't help himself. The reports he had to go over
wasn't about to wait, even if it was two in the morning.
'Another hour and I'll go to bed,' he promised himself,
knowing it was probably in vain. Although he was already
half-way ready for bed, dressed in dark blue silk pajamas
and the matching deeper midnight blue silk robe tied
around him. He was so engrossed in the paperwork that he 
barely heard the soft knocking at his door.
        Sliding his reading glasses off, Bartlet opened
the door. Standing next to Ron Butterfield was his Chief
of Staff. His friend of many years looked like absolute
hell. Deep lines were etched around tired eyes, his 
normally impeccable wardrobe was rumpled and wrinkled,
not to mention dripping wet. Had he walked from the car
in the rain without an umbrella? 
        "Leo, what...? Is something wrong?" Jed asked with
obvious concern.
        Leo blinked several times. Listless dark eyes regarded
him with something akin to surprise. Like he hadn't even
realized where he was. "I...uh...no, Mr. President, nothing
is wrong. I'm sorry, I-I shouldn't have disturbed you. Good 
night, Sir," Leo stated with a frown. He was about to turn 
around when he felt a strong hand catching his shoulder, 
stopping him in his tracks.
        "Leo, I was up anyway. Why don't you come in?" the 
President suggested softly. 
        His Chief of Staff was complacent as Jed pulled
him inside his living quarters. Dark eyes met with those
of Butterfield's. "Please bring us some coffee and after
that, do not let anyone disturb us."
        The secret service agent merely nodded and left to
collect the coffee as he was asked.
        Jed turned his attention back to his friend whom
was leaving a puddle in the middle of his living room.
        "Forget your umbrella?" Jed chided gently, a small
smile softening his words.
        For the first time, Leo looked down at himself and 
seemed to just realize he was soaked to the skin.
        "Sorry," he apologized belatedly. "I guess I didn't 
have it with me."
        Jed shrugged it off. "Well come on, you can't very 
well stay in those wet clothes. Margaret would kill me if 
I let you catch pneumonia."
        Jed headed towards his bedroom as Leo obediently
followed. Digging into a drawer in his wardrobe, Jed
pulled out a gray Notre Dame sweatshirt and matching
gray sweatpants and tossed them towards Leo. 
        "You know where the bathroom is," Jed stated
and waited until his friend nodded and went to the
bathroom. When it was shut behind him, Jed went back
into living room to wait on the sofa. 
        There was another knock on his door. After taking
the coffee tray from Agent Butterfield, Jed filled two
cups and sipped his while he waited for Leo to finish
changing. Finally the still tired but dryer version of
his friend reemerged. 
        Jed waited until Leo dropped down on the sofa
next to him and took several slow sips of the steaming
coffee he forced into Leo's hands before speaking.
        "Leo, tell me what's going on."
        His Chief of Staff studiously avoided his gaze.
        "Jed, I want to get drunk," Leo stated simply.
        The President paused at that. He knew the instant
Leo had used his first name that tonight they would not
be the President and Chief of Staff, that Leo needed
Jed Bartlet, his best friend and confidant. 
        Lips pressed together in a slight frown. "Jenny?"
he asked knowingly.
        Leo nodded and took another swig of the strong
brew, wanting to drown the need inside of him for
something stronger yet. Silence settled around them
like a blanket and Leo was grateful that Jed was
waiting until he was ready, allowing him the time to
collect his thoughts.
        "It's over this time, really over," he whispered.
"I knew it was coming but..." Leo let his graveled voice
trail off.
        "But you still held on to hope," Jed stated gently. 
        Leo nodded and paused before speaking again,
vaguely aware that Jed's hand had come to rest on his
thigh. "I should've done more, told her, showed her
what she meant to me."
        Jed wanted to tell Leo that he'd done all he
could, that sometimes people just grew apart no matter
how much they loved each other, that Jenny still loved
him, but he knew that wouldn't accomplish anything. He
knew their friendship went past platitudes and false
assurances. Instead he simply squeezed his fingers
gently against Leo's thigh and waited.
        "She never understood, you know," Leo said
abruptly. "She never did understand us," Leo looked
up into Jed's dark eyes for the first time that night.
"What we're trying to do here, all the stuff we promised
each other we'd accomplish once we got here. She always
thought I'd have been happier if I'd stayed the Secretary
of Labor and you'd stayed the governor." 
        Jed leaned forward. "Think she might have been
right?"
        "Hell no!" Leo growled with determination. "We
fought for this too damn hard for me to have any regrets.
I know we can make a real difference here and I've never
had any doubts about it. With you in office..." Leo held
Jed's gaze. "...I feel like only good things are going
to happen in this country and the sky's the limit," he
admitted.
        Bartlet could feel the beginnings of a blush heating
his cheeks. It wasn't often he saw open adoration in his
long-time friend's face. Usually they had too many serious
issues to deal with, some crisis to advert, or spent their 
time bantering back and forth, but times like this...it was 
almost enough to suck the air right out of him. Leo had
such faith in him, he only hoped he lived up to that faith.
        "You know I wouldn't be where I am without you,"
Jed admitted in return. "You made it possible." the
President ran his hand up and down Leo's thigh. "I needed
you and you were right there." Jed sighed and rubbed at
tired eyes. "Maybe that's the real problem. Maybe I
need you too much."
        "What are you talking about?" Leo asked incredulously. 
        Jed sat back against the sofa. "If I hadn't needed
you so much, need you as much as I do, you might have been
able to work things out with Jenny."
        Leo shook his head defiantly. "Nope, I don't think
that would have made a bit of difference. Truth is I
just didn't try hard enough and now I've got to live
with that." His hand went to cover Jed's. "Don't even start 
blaming yourself for the mess I'd made myself." Leo's 
voice dropped in volume and grew huskier. "Besides, I was 
right where I wanted to be." The honesty of that statement 
surprised Leo, but searching inside he knew it was the 
truth. "Maybe you needed me but it wasn't any kind of a 
sacrifice being able to be there for you, especially when 
you've always been there when 'I' needed 'you'."
        "What are you talking about?"
        Leo almost smiled. How could a Nobel laureate, a 
Fighting Irish graduate, the ruler of the free world, be such 
a dense dweeb sometimes? "Jed, I loved Jen, but it was 'your' 
letters I read every night in 'Nam that kept me sane, reminded 
me of what I needed to come back home for. It was 'you' who 
was the first person I ever told about my dad blowing his brains
out in our garage. It was 'you' who threatened me into going 
into rehab and helped me get my act back together."
        Bartlet winced at the memories from the last comment. He 
recalled the cruel words he'd hurled towards the friend he'd 
had nearly all his life. It had gotten so bad that Jed had 
told Leo if he didn't get help that things between them were 
over. No friendship, no more being lovers, nothing. Usually 
Jed deplored emotional manipulation but he'd been desperate. 
He couldn't keep watching the man he loved slowly killing 
himself and not do anything about it. 
        "It's just..." Leo glanced away and down at the floor 
in an uncharacteristic show of timidity.
        Jed caught his chin and forced his face up to meet
his eyes. "It's just what?" he questioned softly.
        "It's just that I didn't tell her, show her enough
that I loved her and I..." the Chief of Staff paused
before his gravel voice said, "...I don't want to make
that same mistake with you."
        "Leo," Jed breathed softly. "I know you love me,"
he reassured his friend. "As much as I love you." Leaning 
closer, Bartlet's other hand snaked behind the other man's 
head and gently he took Leo's mouth with his own. 
        Leo held his breath as soft, warm lips as familiar
to him as his own caressed over his with practiced expertise.
Opening up willingly, Leo felt his mouth being explored
by a knowing tongue, flicking across his cheek, skirting
over his teeth, dueling with his own tongue in invitation.
His tongue captured, Leo felt it being sucked into Jed's
mouth and he released a barely audible moan as he drove
into and tasted the flavor of his lover. A flavor he knew
only too well and always craved more of. He could easily
lose himself in one of Jed's kisses.
        When the need of air became too strong to ignore,
they finally separated, Jed looked down into Leo's 
flushed face. Dark eyes were slightly dazed and his
Chief of Staff's breathing had become more rapid and 
irregular, much like his own.
        "I'm not Jenny," he said gruffly.
        "I'm well aware of that fact," Leo responded with a
slight, sly smile pulling at his kiss-swollen lips.
        Jed didn't smile back, his expression solemn, his
dark gaze intense. "Then don't think what we've got is
going to end like things did with her." The grip Bartlet
had on the back of Leo's head tightened just enough to
make sure he had McGarry's full attention. "I'm going
to be around for a very long time. Count on it."
        'Believe me, I am. More than you know,' Leo thought 
to himself. Instead of speaking though, he leaned forward
to recapture Jed's lips once more, his own fingers digging
into to dark, silken hair. He let the sweet warmth sweep
through him, flooding him with growing arousal that helped
pry the lingering tendrils of pain from around his heart.
More intoxicating than wine, smoother than the slide of
whisky, warmer than cognac was the affect Jed had on him.
Somewhere in the back of his mind, Leo realized that 'this'
was what he needed, not alcohol. Liquor couldn't reach the
depths of him that Jed could. He'd almost forgotten that
little fact but it had come flooding back with the first
touch. And if it were possible to be addicted to a person,
then this was one addiction he was in no hurry to recover
from.
        Jed's lips roamed from Leo's lips to nip, kiss, and
nuzzle against Leo's neck. He suckled gently where the other
man's shoulder met his throat while Leo's hands slid inside
Jed's dark robe and under the silk pajama top to stroke Jed's
bare back. Jed breathed in Leo's scent...clean like the rain
mixed with the slightly musky cologne Leo had worn for years
mingled with Leo's own scent. He loved Leo's scent, loved the
feel of the rough hands against his skin caressing him with
touches that were both strong and tender, loved hearing
that gruff voice humming with pleasure. He loved the fact
that he could bring Leo pleasure.
        Leo's hands came around to untie the robe and tugged
it off Jed's shoulders. Catching Jed's lips, Leo kissed
him slowly and thoroughly while working the buttons of
Jed's nightshirt open. Fingers stroked each new expanse of
skin exposed until it became finally completely unbuttoned
and Leo was free to push it down and off to give his fingers
free rein. He revealed in the feel of the plane of muscles 
that moved under his touch. Yes, time had taken its toll 
on both of their bodies. Gone with youth were the rock hard
firmness and sculpted angles, given way to softer muscles and
rounder curves. 
        It didn't seem to make a bit of difference though 
because every time they touched like this, all Leo saw was 
the man he'd first made love to over thirty-five years ago. 
He could still close his eyes and recall that summer vacation 
from college he'd spent in New Hampshire. The days spent
in each other's easy company, the nights spent in reckless,
carefree passion where the world was at their feet and anything
was possible. God, it seemed like a lifetime ago yet in Jed's 
arms still as tangible as a breath away. 
        Once more Leo gave silent thanks to whatever deity
had happened to take pity on him that summer so long ago.
He'd been helplessly in love with Jed Bartlet for the last
two years of high school and their freshman year at college
but had never taken the chance of letting Jed in on that
little fact. After all, what had a poor-boy smuck like him
have to offer the intelligent, charming, albeit occasionally
awkward and klutzy, Josiah Bartlet? Apparently more than he
had thought, because one night early that summer Jed had
made the first move. The rest had been, as they say, history.
        Leo took advantage of having a half-nude Bartlet within
reach. Fingers brushed against dark nipples and teased them
to hardness. Jed gasped slightly when Leo then captured one
between his teeth. Leo tugged and worried the stiff nub, blowing
cool air onto it before moving to give the other one the same
rapt attention. Soft moans let him know Jed was definitely
enjoying the seductive teasing.
        Jed ran his hands down Leo's back in broad, long, strokes,
up over his  shoulders and the nape of his neck. There was
too much damn material between them, Jed groused to himself
and looking to rectify that situation, reached down and tugged
at his alma matter sweatshirt. Leo leaned back long enough
to raise his arms and let Jed pull the offending fabric up
and over his head. Tossed against the back of the sofa, it
left Jed free to run his hands up and down Leo's upper-body
while he plundered the other man's willing mouth.
        Leo murmured his approval at the gentle massaging 
strokes and squeezes starting to send a nice little ache
well south. The murmuring turned into a full-fledged
moan against Jed's lips when the President pulled his Chief 
of Staff up to straddle his thighs. Firm hands slid down the 
back of Leo's sweatpants to cup his bare cheeks, squeezing 
them, pulling him close enough that their mutual erections 
were rubbing against each other insistently.
        Jed leaned back, wrapping one leg around Leo who was 
now laying across him. Hands still clutching into the warm 
flesh of Leo's rear, Jed guided Leo's thrusting hips against  
his own. Jed raised his hips, grinding Leo's into him as the 
friction stirred the simmering arousal into a stronger, yet 
still tempered, need. Bare chest to bare chest, lips to lips, 
there was not an inch of space separating them as the hot,
pulsing need grew more rampant. The thin material of sweatpants
and silk bottoms grew damp and strained against their growing
ardor. The heat between them still unmistakable even within
the cloth confines. 
        Minutes stretched on, the friction growing faster and
faster. Even with the benefit of patience that age afforded 
them, Jed realized if he was going to make the most of this
night, he needed to slow down. His fingers curled and dug
into Leo's hips, trying to mitigate the hunger driving them.
        "Let's take this to the bedroom," he suggested in a
ragged, winded voice.
        "Good idea," Leo agreed, reluctantly disentangling
himself from Jed's embrace.
        Leo held out his hand and helped Jed up to his feet.
Fingers laced together, Jed led the way towards the bedroom
and the king sized bed that promised much more room and
comfort than the sofa could provide.
        Next to the bed, both men fell into an easy embrace,
feather light kisses raining down on bare necks and shoulders.
Caresses, light and easy, banked the embers of desire smoldering
between them. Leo held steady to Jed's shoulders as the
President pushed the band of the sweatpants down around his 
ankles. Stepping out of them, Leo went down on one knee, then 
the other until he was kneeling in front of Jed. In one
swift movement, Leo pulled down the pajama bottoms, releasing
Jed's substantial erection. 
        Leo eyed his lover's sex with blatant hunger. Jed 
wasn't particularly long, but he was thick. Currently he
was also hard, flushed, and leaking copiously. The flared
head glistened with the drops of precum pooling at the tip.
Letting his tongue dart out, Leo swiped across and dipped
into the tip to collect the salty taste only to watch it
pool again as Jed let out a soft gasp. 
        He swirled around the head again several times, flicking 
back and forth, licking lightly up and down the shaft. He 
heard Jed growl his approval and feel fingers sink into his 
hair in silent pleading but without force. Leo, however,
didn't need the encouragement as he opened his mouth and
took Jed's length inside greedily.
        Establishing a rhythm, Leo used his teeth, tongue,
cheeks and lips in a well orchestrated concert bent on 
driving his lover to distraction and pulling a string of
throaty moans from Jed's lips. To which, if Jed's reaction
was any indication, he was more than successful. Jed's
hands gently guided him and his hips started shallowly
thrusting. Leo looked up, catching Jed's gaze. Hazel eyes
had turned nearly black with arousal and were glazed over
as they watched each and every movement Leo made. Holding
the gaze, Leo opened his throat up further, effectively
deep-throating the other man. His hands slid up behind Barlet's
legs, caressing his thighs before one settled on massaging
one firm buttock while the other came around to fondle the
heavy sac between Jed's thighs.
        "Christ, damn," Jed cursed raggedly, his words turning
incoherent as Leo's suction became even stronger.
        Leo loved the sound of Jed's voice, could even get
easily aroused listening to the other man speak, but there
was something so erotically powerful in driving the skilled
orator past the point of the ability to utter an intelligent
syllable. Leo savored the feel of Jed's organ against the
back of his throat for a good long moment more before 
releasing the ruddy length to lave his tongue around the
sac his fingers were handling, pulling one into his mouth
to suckle. His nose nuzzled against the wiry hairs, his
fingers squeezing so hard into Jed's buttocks he knew he
had to be leaving prints but couldn't help himself. Hands
brushed through his hair, caressed against Leo's cheek while
one of his own hands came down to rub at the erection that 
was making demands of it's own.
        Holding on to what scant control that was left to him,
Jed managed to push Leo back by the shoulders, gaining the
other man's attention. Taking him under the arms, he pulled
Leo back up and towards him for a kiss.
        "God, what you do to me," Jed murmured shakily 
against Leo's lips once they broke for air.
        "Josiah, I want you so much..."
        Jed trembled at the smoky, rich tone as much as the
sound of his full first name. Leo only used that name on
two occasions, one being when he'd done something to really
piss the other man off, the other during intimate times like
this. Spoken so quietly, reverently, a secret endearment that
even Abbey didn't share in. When Leo used it, it was like a
verbal caress that never failed to affect him. 
        "I want you too," Jed assured him, taking steps and
slowly propelling Leo backwards until they finally made it
to the bed.
        Climbing into bed, both men stretched out side by
side. Jed brushed his fingers across Leo's bare side and
hip in a languid motion. He was more than a little distracted
by the feel of Leo's fingers teasing the crevice between his 
cheeks, tenderly teasing the intimate opening there. His lips 
brushed back and forth against Leo's hotly.
        "What do you want tonight?" Jed asked, though he 
already suspected he knew exactly which way Leo wanted...
needed...it to be. At least this time, tonight. He still 
needed to hear the words though.
        "I want you in me," Leo responded in a throaty demand.
        Jed nodded, kissed him once more soundly, then reached
across him to the nightstand. Opening the drawer, he recovered
the tube of lubricant and one of the foil wrapped condoms kept 
there. Sitting back on his knees, Jed passed the condom over
to Leo.
        Reaching out, Leo took Jed in a warm hand and stroked
the engorged sex several times before opening the foil. 
Sitting up himself, his tongue licked at Jed's lips, the
tips of their tongues teasing and darting into the other's
mouth as Leo slowly unrolled the sheath over Jed's member.
        Jed watched as Leo then took the lubricant and squirting
some onto his own fingers, laid back and began preparing himself.
He watched for a moment, the sight going straight to his 
already aching groin. Brushing Leo's hand aside, Jed took over.
Pumping first one finger then a second, Bartlet worked the
muscled opening until it started to give and relax. His
teeth bit at one of Leo's nipples then traveled with wet,
open kisses down the other man's stomach as he steadily
scissored his fingers. Finally he was sure Leo was relaxed
and as receptive as he was going to get.
        "Ready?"
        "Oh yeah," Leo attested with barely hidden impatience.
        Jed smiled and moved back up Leo's body until he was
back to the mouth he couldn't seem to get enough of.
        Leo pulled his knees up further when he felt the blunt
tip of Jed's erection pushing against his opening. Jed's one
free hand guided it as Leo felt himself breached by the
familiar girth. The breath he'd holding hissed out through
clenched teeth, the momentary pain always blinding him, until
Jed sunk fully against him.
        "Breathe, lover," Jed instructed him, nuzzling against
his throat as a reminder.
        Leo complied with light panting breaths once the sharp
discomfort dissipated until only the feeling of fullness was
left. And Jed did fill him. He felt Jed everywhere around him,
consuming him. The heat of skin, the taste of sweat, the
smell of arousal. It was everywhere, taking over until the
only thing that seemed to exist was the two of them and the
sensation of Jed inside of him.
        It seemed like an eternity before Jed started to move,
but finally he did. Leo's eyes closed at the feel of Jed sliding
in him, pulling almost all the way out only to sink back in
hilt deep. Leo's hips rose and fell, mimicking the rhythm Jed
was establishing. 
        "Jesus, you're so hot and tight," Jed groaned out, 
grinding himself into Leo. 
        Hands sliding down sweat slicked biceps, Leo pulled
Jed down until he was resting on top of him. Somewhere in
the back of his mind, Leo found himself thinking once more
of Jenny in a sense. Of course he'd loved her, had loved
'making' love to her, but with Jed on top of him, the man so
vibrant and intense, it was so much different than anything
he'd ever shared with Jenny. With Jed he had a freedom to
explore his passions to the limits, no holding back or over
thinking. Maybe it was the bond of their friendship that
acted like the safety-net, tested and tried over so many
years, that let him know that no matter what, Jed was there
to catch him.
        Jed moved in and out, faster and faster, driven by the
heat and the sheer constriction as Leo clenched and squeezed
around him. Hot breath brushed against his cheek as he sought
Leo's mouth, his tongue driving in, mimicking the dance of
their bodies. Outside the rain was still coming down in 
torrents, thunder cracking, lighting illuminating the deepest
regions of the late-night horizon, but Jed couldn't hear it
over the pounding of his own heart and couldn't see past the
storm of emotion flashing in Leo's eyes.
        Jed was heavy on him, the weight felt good and he
could feel his erection wedged between them getting abraded
with Jed's stomach moving back and forth over it. The added
sensation along with that of Jed inside him was getting to
be too much to bare. He could feel the tension building in
Jed's muscles as well, and he knew it wasn't going to take
long until they both lost the battle with control. 
        "Jed, I-I'm going to..." he growled out in warning.
        "Do it Leo, let me watch you come," Jed rumbled back.
        Feeling his muscles twitching, the tight ball of fire 
in his gut racing along nerve-endings, engulfing and spreading,
reaching for the furthest regions of his body. Arching hard,
his body jerked and spasmed, the hot, liquid rush coating
their stomachs as his voice fractured with Jed's name on his
lips. 
        Jed was pounding into him and somewhere through a fog
of satiation, he could sense that Jed was riding the edge,
hovering. Leo called on the one trick he'd learned over the
years he knew would work. He bit down, hard, on the leader
in Jed's neck while squeezing around Jed's erection with
all of his might.
        Under his hands, Leo felt Jed's muscles quiver and
seize up, felt the tremor of Jed's sex inside him, and heard his
own name called out in a mixture of a moan and a cry against his
throat. With one or two more shallow thrusts of his hips, Jed went
still, his forehead resting against Leo's, eyes closed tight,
perspiration dripping down off of his hair and into his eyes.
Several heartbeats passed and Jed opened his eyes and placed a
wispy kiss so  tender on Leo's lips that the other man barely felt
it.  Finally Jed had no choice but to pull free from Leo's body
with a touch of regret at the separation. Laying down on his 
back, he took the condom off and threw it away in the 
wastebasket on his side of the bed. 
        Leo rolled over and into his arms. Jed tightened his
embrace as they both rested, his fingers carding through Leo's
pale hair. He kissed the other man's temple and mused once
more on the fact that it seemed like getting older had certain 
trade-offs. While they had more patience and had more time to 
hone their expertise, it seemed like it took a lot longer to
recover.
        Minutes ticked by and Jed's eyes started to flutter
shut, but he knew he couldn't go to sleep yet, not while
they were still covered in the aftermath of their loving.
Slipping free from Leo, he rolled out of the bed with a
groan.
        "How's your back?" Leo asked, noticing the slight wince
that passed over Jed's features.
        "It'll be fine," Jed assured him, leaning over for 
another kiss before walking off to the bathroom.
        Leo enjoyed the view of Jed's bare rear as he stretched
out his own muscles. He heard the water running and then soft
chuckling.
        "What's so funny?" Leo asked when Jed reemerged with
a dampened cloth in hand.
        Jed was still smiling when he handed the cloth over
to Leo.
        "Oh, nothing, I was just remembering the first time I
threw my back out."
        Leo cleaned off the sticky remnants on his stomach 
before tossing it aside. He couldn't hide his smile and didn't
even bother trying.
        "I'll never forget the look on your face." Leo chuckled
himself in remembrance. "You should have known better than to
try that position in the first place," he chided.
        "Yeah, well it looked a helluva lot easier on the tape,"
Jed grumbled. "Besides I didn't hear you arguing matters up
to that point."
        Leo's eyes gleamed mischievously. "Yeah, 'till then things
had been getting pretty entertaining."
        "What was fun was trying to explain it to Abbey," Jed
remarked, climbing back into bed and pulling the covers
back over them.
        Leo's expression turned thoughtful. "Yeah, it's a good
thing she sure loves ya."
        Jed pulled Leo back into his arms. "'Us', she loves us,
Leo," Jed murmured. "She might be wearing the wedding ring I
gave her, but she loves you too."
        "I know," Leo whispered quietly. "I know."
        Jed tightened his arms around him in a hug. "Good, now
let's try to get some sleep. We've got a staff meeting in a
couple of hours."
        After turning out the light, Jed closed his eyes and
nuzzled his nose against Leo's soft, rain-scented hair and
let himself begin to drift off. He was nearly sound asleep
when he felt Leo stir and release himself from Jed's embrace.
Soft padding of feet let Jed know Leo was headed to the 
bathroom without having to open his eyes to check. A moment
later he heard the flushing of the toilet and the running of
water and waited for Leo to come back to the warm haven of
their bed. When a few minutes passed and the bed was still
empty, Jed opened a bleary eye. Leo was standing at the
balcony door, looking out into the night. 
        Jed swung his legs over the bed and got up. Pulling
his robe on once again, he came up behind Leo. Peering out,
Jed could see that the storm had broke and the cloud cover
had lifted, leaving behind an effulgent mantle of stars
cloaking the skyline. The trees and grass glistened under 
its pale light. Sliding his hands down Leo's arms, he
linked his fingers with the other man and pulled him back
into him while crossing their arms against Leo's chest. 
        "What's on your mind?" Jed asked, resting his chin on
Leo's shoulder.
        "Just thinking about 'Nam," Leo replied softly.
        "Good memories or bad?"
        Leo shrugged. "A bit of both I suppose." Of course
there had been too much bad and not nearly enough good, but
he'd come to terms with most of that part of his past.
        Jed contentedly held Leo, silently looking towards the 
heavens and admiring its subdued beauty. He often wondered 
about just how much of Leo's tour of 'Nam the other man had
left out for his benefit, but he never pushed for more than
what Leo was willing to give. An understanding that formed
between them a long time ago.
        "Ya know, there were times at night, especially while
on night flights, I couldn't get enough of the stars," Leo 
stated, keeping his tone detached. 
        "Looking for answers up there?" Jed had done that
many times himself when none could be found elsewhere.
        "Not really. Most of the time I just needed to look at
that star," Leo said, pointing his and Jed's linked hand at
the brightest star in the night.
        "The North Star?"
        Leo nodded slightly. "Yeah, the one and the same."
        "What was so special about it?"
        Leo relaxed into Jed, felt the warmth as the other man
supported his weight. "I knew that no matter where I was or
how bad things got there, that if I could follow it, it'd
lead me home again." His arms tightened around Jed's. "And
home was where you were, waiting for me." 
        "Home is where the heart is."
        "They got that one right." Leo turned in Jed's arms
and kissed the one who'd always been his true north, the one
constant during all of the storms as well as the placidity
in his life, always by his side without judgement or
expectations, simply loving him as he was. God, how Leo
loved him.
        "Let's get some sleep," Jed proposed once they broke
the kiss and inhaled some cool night air.
        Leo followed his lover back to bed and climbed under
the warm comforter and into waiting arms. Settling down, he
closed his eyes while  his head was resting on Jed's chest.
The feeling of fingers brushing through his hair and the
sound of the heart beating steadily under his ear lulled
him to sleep.
        Jed was nearly asleep himself for the second time
that night, listening to Leo's soft snoring, when he heard
the door to their living quarters open and close. A few
seconds later their bedroom door opened up, the soft light
filtering in behind Abbey as she entered.
        "You're back," Jed whispered. She hadn't been due back 
until the following night.
        "And you're up," she whispered back, walking over to his 
side of the bed and placing a tender kiss against his lips.
        "Stayed up late going over some reports for the staff
meeting tomorrow," he explained.
        "Two doctors couldn't make it to the conference so
it ended a day early," Abbey explained herself. She took
her earrings off and laid them on the nightstand and
kicked off her high heels. "I have to take a shower, be
out in a few minute."
        Jed nodded, watching her turn for the bathroom. She
unzipped her skirt and pulled off her blouse before shutting
the door. Trying hard to keep his eyes open, Jed let his
hands roam over his sleeping lover. He couldn't help but
smile when Leo snuggled in closer to him. He peppered the
other man's forehead with soft, breezy kisses. Yawning, he 
ran a hand over his own face and wished Abbey would hurry. 
If he weren't so tired, he'd offer to help her, he thought 
with a wicked grin. At last, the bathroom door opened and
Abbey walked over to the bed. 
        Jed had a moment to appreciate the pale pink silk
negligee his wife was wearing, the way it floated delicately
around her soft curves, before she climbed into bed and
covered up with the blanket. She snuggled up and spooned
behind Leo, her fingers stroking over his hip before coming 
to hold hands with Jed.
        "Is he okay?" she asked quietly, the concern obvious.
        Jed had called her earlier in the day and had filled 
her in about the divorce papers and her mind had been on the 
other man the rest of the day. She'd met the end of the 
conference with relief, ready to come back home to them both.
        His gaze fell to the sleeping form between them. "He 
will be."
        Abbey smiled and lightly pressed a kiss to the back of
Leo's neck. "I know he will." It was spoken as a resolute
promise. She knew they could see him through it, love him
through it. 
        Jed leaned over as Abbey rose up and they shared
a private, passionate, slow kiss.
        "Missed you, love you, glad you're back," Jed whispered.
        "Me too, sweetheart," she said, falling back against
the pillow.
        As the pale moon shone into the room, the dawn hovering
on the horizon, Abbey Bartlet fell asleep feeling blessed in
having enough love in their lives to be able to share it
with the man resting soundly, safely, between them.

The End.