Disclaimer - Paramount own the names.
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***THE FOLLOWING MESSAGE IS INTENDED FOR THE NAMED RECIPIENT ONLY. IF YOU HAVE SOMEHOW RECEIVED THIS MESSAGE AND ARE NOT THE INTENDED RECIPIENT, PLEASE FORWARD A COPY TO THE ORIGINAL AUTHOR OF THE MESSAGE. ALL INFORMATION IS TO BE KEPT PRIVATE, AS STATED IN CHAPTER FOUR, PARAGRAPH TWO, LINE FIVE, OF STARFLEET MESSAGE GUIDELINES, BOOK THREE.***
BEGIN MESSAGE
FROM: Seven of Nine
TO: Paris, Thomas Eugene
SUBJECT: An Affiliation
Lieutenant Paris,
Since our conversation two days ago regarding the development of a romantic relationship, I have given serious consideration to your suggestion. Sufficient time has now passed for me to draw my conclusions and I am pleased to inform you I agree with your suggestion, and look forward to initiating a romantic relationship as soon as possible.
However, after consulting various texts and opinions, I have also come to the conclusion that the aspects of 'dating' can take a very long time to resolve themselves. I don't believe there is any need to delay the development of our relationship due to the confines of time caused by both of our work demands. Therefore, through my own experiences and with some advice from the Doctor, I have constructed the following list to describe my requirements:
INSTRUCTIONS FOR DATING
1) Music. Soothing. The Doctor has informed me that this can be most beneficial and can create a very 'cosy' atmosphere. I am often not comfortable with 'cosy', but I am willing to try.
2) I appreciate the sensation of someone's hands running through my hair when it is down. You will perform this action.
3) You will remove my clothing yourself. I have been informed that this is a very pleasurable activity. I wish to experience it (Please note that this often takes a great deal of time, so please set aside an extra two hours for this designated activity).
4) You will not give me a nickname. I find them offensive.
5) I wish to explore the area of kissing. I am still not certain how two orifices touching each other can be pleasurable, but there is a great deal of evidence to confirm this. I have often witnessed yourself and Lieutenant Torres kissing, and you both seemed to enjoy the activity.
6) You will touch my skin, frequently. Not necessarily always when I am naked. Your quarters are an appropriate location. I do not believe Astrometrics or the bridge would be acceptable.
7) You will continue telling your 'bad jokes'. I find them amusing.
8) When I am menstruating, you will provide me with something called a 'hot water bottle' and then leave me alone unless I decide otherwise.
9) We will participate in your Captain Proton scenario together, but this time I wish to play the role of Arachnia, Queen of The Spider People. This would make me your enemy, but she is a far more interesting character than Constance Goodheart. I looked up the description of the word 'secretary'. It said nothing about secretaries "tagging along on all the missions".
10) You will create excuses to spend more time with me.
If you do not find any of these acceptable, then please contact me so we may reach some compromise.
Regards,
Seven of Nine
END MESSAGE
***
BEGIN MESSAGE
FROM: Paris, Thomas Eugene
TO: Seven of Nine
SUBJECT: Re: An Affiliation
Seven,
No, I don't have any problems with any of those, but I do have some 'instructions' of my own:
You will call me Tom. You will have fun. You will share a pizza with me. You will do something inefficient just for the hell of it. And...
I guess I lied.
I will touch you whenever the hell I want to.
Any problems with that?
Tom
END MESSAGE
***
BEGIN MESSAGE
FROM: Seven of Nine
TO: Paris, Thomas Eugene
SUBJECT: Re: An Affiliation
Very well.
END MESSAGE
***
~FINIS