In Memory - Creative Expressions of Grief

GUIDE US HOME

The brightest day as the day we met
You held my finger tight
Your sparkling eyes touched everyone
Who came into your sight
The longest year was full of love
And happiness with you
You blessed our lives and still we wished
This year never be through

The longest night has just begun
We're lost and all alone
We'll hope and pray forevermore
Your love will guide us home

by T. Paul Maybury (Geordi's father)
written for Geordi's funeral March 10 1995

GEM'S SERENITY PRAYER

God grant me the serenity to accept Geordi's death,
The courage to go on without her,
And the wisdom to make something good come of it.

adapted by Liz Maybury (Geordi's mother) 
from the Serenity Prayer 

ALONE IN GRIEF

As I speak my child's name,
Friends and family shift
Moving farther adrift
Showing discomfort and blame.

It began under a surgeon's knife,
Her heart they did fix,
But surgery and disease do not mix
For the latter took her life.

Seventeen months end in a flash
Forgotten by those who say they care
Toys and clothing she did wear
Thrown away like trash.

Family and friends I avoid
They do not understand why I mourn
As time passes since the day she was born,
I cry from the void.

Get over it, they say, it's in the past
Seeing their children, mine I miss,
To hold her once more and give a kiss
No one knows how long grief can last

by Teresa Amy (Geordi's aunt) 

TRIBUTE TO GEORDI ELIZABETH MAYBURY

Oh, little GEM, did you meet Him 
on a sunlit hilltop?
Did you dance into His arms?
And did you show each other 
your strife-torn hands and 
your broken hearts?

And did he make all the pain go away
like He promised,
and dry your tears?
Yes and yes and yes, I know
that is what happened
because I see my dream
reflected in everybody's tears.

We loved you, little GEM--
Keep shining bright.

by Barbara Getz, 
member of First Baptist Church Oshawa

MEMORIES

Memories
of a sweet little girl
sitting on the floor,
playing.

Watching my daughter
as she was also
sitting on the floor
playing.

Memories
of the interaction~
of one little girl
reaching for another.

Memories
of a friendship
just starting to form.

Memories
of a sweet little girl
sitting on the floor.

Who now
sits in heaven
on Jesus' knee.

by Nancy Lomax, 
friend of Paul and Liz Maybury
HEAVEN'S SPECIAL CHILD

A meeting was held quite far from earth,
"It's time again for another birth", said the
Angels to the Lord above, This special
child will need much love.

"Her progress may seem very slow;
accomplishments she may not show.
And she'll require extra care from the
Folks she meets way down there.

"She may not run, or laugh or play,
her thoughts may seem quite far away.
In many ways, she won't adapt, and
she'll be known as handicapped.  

So, lets be careful where she's sent,
we want her life to be content.
Please, Lord, find the parents who will do
a special job for you.  They will not realize
right away the leading role they're asked to play,

But with this child sent from above, comes
stronger faith and richer love.
And soon they'll know the privilege given,
in caring from this gift from Heaven.

This precious charge so meek and mild,
Is "Heaven's very special child."

THE THINGS IN THE CABINET DRAWER

There are whips and tops and pieces of string
And shoes that no little feet ever wear;
There are bits of ribbon and broken wings
And tresses of golden hair.

There are dainty jackets that never are worn
There are toys and models of ships;
There are books and pictures all faded and torn
And marked by finger tips
Of dimpled hands that have fallen to dust -
Yet we strive to think that the Lord is just.

Yet a feeling of bitterness fills our soul;
Sometimes we try to pray,
That the Reaper has spared so many flowers
And taken ours away.
And sometimes we doubt if the Lord can know
How our riven hearts did love them so.

But we think of our dear ones dead,
Our children who never grow old,
And how they are waiting and watching for us
In the city with streets of gold;
And how they are safe through all the years
From sickness and want and war.
We thank the great God, with falling tears,
For the things in the cabinet drawer.

TO ALL PARENTS

"I'll lend you for a little time a child of mine, " He said,
"for you to love the while she lives and mourn for when she's dead.
It may be six or seven years, or twenty-two or three,
But will you, till I call her back, take care of her for me?
She'll bring her charms to gladden you, and shall her stay be brief,
You'll have her lovely memories as solace for your grief.

I cannot promise she will stay, since all from earth returns,
But there are lessons taught down there I want this child to learn.
I've looked the whole wide world over in my search for teachers true
And from the throngs that crowds life's lanes I have selected you.

Now will you give her all your love, nor think the labor vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call to take her back again?"
I fancied that I heard them say: "Dear Lord, Thy will be done!
For all the joy Thy child shall bring, the risk of grief we'll run.
We'll shelter her with tenderness, we'll love her while we may,
And for the happiness we've known forever grateful stay;
but shall the angels call for her much sooner than we've planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes and try to understand."

by Edgar Guest

 HEARTACHE

Our little girl has left us
And now her spirit's free
Just like a little butterfly
She's flown away from me

Just where she's gone, I do not know
But what she's left behind
I'll treasure 'til my final days
In archives in my mind

Her contribution touched the hearts
Of many whom she met
In a special unique way
A way they can't forget

Our dear Michelle, who came to us
To teach us how to love
Has done her task so off she's gone
Back to her place above

I feel so sad that she has gone
But feel relieved as well
She's free from her helpless cocoon
As far as I can tell

I give my thanks for what she brought
I've grown a lot since then
And may this heartache slowly die
And let me live again
          Written by Sharon Kortas 9.11.96

BE STILL

Be  still,  my  child,  and  know  I  am  God.
Whatever trial you face, whatever path you trod,
I  am  right  beside  you,  holding  your  weak  hand,
You'll never face alone a strange or unknown land.
I  will  give  you  strength,  no  matter  what  the  task,
I will give you peace, if only you ask.
And  should  your  feet  stumble  beneath  your  heavy  load,
I promise to then carry you along that treacherous road.
When  at  life's  end  you  look  back  at  the  journey  WE  have   trod,
You'll see the way was the smoothest when you just let me be God.
   (Heather Mitchell)

  MISS YOU

I miss you in the morning, dear,
    When all the world is new;
I know the day can bring no joy
        Because it brings not you.
I miss the well-loved voice of you,
        Your tender smile for me,
The charm of you, the joy of your
        Unfailing sympathy.

The world is full of folks, it's true,
        But there was only one of you.

I miss you at the noontide, dear;
        The crowded city street
Seems but a desert now, I walk
        In solitude complete.
I miss your hand beside my own
        The light touch of your hand,
The quick gleam in the eyes of you
        So sure to understand.

The world is full of folks, it's true,
        But there was only one of you.

I miss you in the evening, dear,
        When daylight fades away;
I miss the sheltering arms of you
        To rest me from the day,
I try to think I see you yet
        There where the firelight gleams-
Where at last, I sleep, and still
        I miss you in my dreams.

THE WORLD IS FULL OF FOLKS, IT'S TRUE,
        BUT THERE WAS ONLY ONE OF YOU.

Author Unknown  

I'M FREE

Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free
I'm following the path God laid for me.
I took His hand when I head Him call,
I turned my back and left it all.

I could not stay another day,
To laugh, to love, to work or play.
Tasks left undone must stay that way,
I found that place at the close of day.

If my parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joy.
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss,
Ah yes, these things, I too, will miss.

Be not burdened with times of sorrow,
I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow.
My life's been full, I savored much,
Good friends, good times, a loved one's touch.

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief,
Don't lengthen it now with undue grief.
Lift up your heart and share with me,
God wanted me now, He set me free.

                                Anonymous

ACCEPTANCE
Who is in the most pain?
Is it me or you?
It's just I cannot bear your fate
There's nothing I can do
But ride it out another night
And take things as they are
And when I can accept your fate
I'll surely travel far
                Written by Sharon Kortas 20.11.96

RE-ROUTE
She would have been six
Just yesterday
If she had lived that long
We climbed a mountain
There we stood
And then I sang my song

I sang the song that used to send
My little one to sleep
A moving time it was for us
We many times did weep

We went up there to send balloons
Into the sky up high
There was no wind at all we found
Balloons just could not fly

Instead they dropped right to the ground
And popped, to our dismay
Reminding us, life doesn't go
The way we plan each day

I laughed and said "The irony!
Michelle has taught us this
Life doesn't go as we expect
It seems like hit or miss"

The trick I've found is to re-route
When things don't go my way
And get through things as best I can
When my path goes astray.
                 Written by Sharon Kortas 30.3.97

AN  ANGEL WHISPER

Angels are ever all around us
And with His love they do surround us.
When my heart is sore in need
The angels come, my soul to feed.
They come to me from up above
and sing in whispers of "His" love.
When in my heart I feel a tug
I know that it's an Angels hug. 

THE FIRST GRIEF

"OH! call my brother back to me,
I cannot play alone;
The summer comes with flower and bee--
Where is my brother gone? 

"The butterfly is glancing bright
Across the sunbeam's track;
I care not now to chase its flight--
Oh! call my brother back." 

"The flowers run wild--the flowers we sowed
Around our garden tree;
Our vine is drooping with its load--
Oh! call him back to me." 

"He would not hear my voice, fair child!
He may not come to thee;
The face that once like spring-time smiled
On earth no more thou'lt see. 

"A rose's brief, bright life of joy,
Such unto him was given;
Go--thou must play alone, my boy--
Thy brother is in heaven! 

"And has he left the birds and flowers,
And must I call in vain;
And through the long, long summer hours,
Will he not come again? 

"And by the brook, and in the glade,
Are all our wanderings o'er?
Oh! while my brother with me played,
Would I had loved him more!"

by Felecia Hemans

SOMEONE WHO'LL WATCH OVER ME

I remember how I used to watch over you,
Tried to teach you the things you should do.
I can remember the things I would say
As I tried to guide you along the way.

But since you've gone, and our lives have changed,
It seems the roles have been rearranged.
Sometimes it feels like it used to be,
Only you're the one watching over me.

I know in my mind that you're not here;
Yet there are times when you feel so near.
I've learned if I let love flow through,
I'll get to keep a part of you.

For death comes - the love never goes away.
Your presence is with me every day.
For my guardian angel you now will be,
And you're the someone who'll watch over me.

by Carolyn Bryan

I SEE YOU

I see you...
In my mind,
your eyes,
your hair,
your nose,
your mouth.

I hear you...
In my mind,
your laugh,
your giggles,
your cries,
your voice.

You are alive...
In me.

You will always...
Be with me,
In my mind,
In my life,
A part of me...
No one can ever take.

I may not be able to hold you
In my arms,
But I hold you,
In my heart.
Always...
Always in my heart.

by Brenda Russell

FORGOTTEN? - NEVER!

Friends may think we have forgotten
When at times they see us smile.
Little do they know the heartaches
That our smiles hide all the while.

Beautiful memories are wonderful things.
That last till the longest day.
They never wear out.
They never get lost and
can never be given away.

To some you may forgotten.
To others apart of the past.
But to those who loved
and lost you
Your memory will always last.

- author unknown

I WALK FOR YOU

Dear Precious child,
I walk for you today,
To share with everyone your love,
In this very special way;
Oh how I wish you were here,
to come and tag along,
For beloved one, if you were here
The miles would not seem so long.

I know that you would love to see
the sun that shines today.
To feel the wind upon your cheek and
chatter all the way.

I still struggle to understand
why you have gone away.
Yet, there's comfort in the fact
we'll meet again someday.

And when the day has dawned
many people say
We can again walk together
as I walk for you today.

Dear child I still think of you
Each day your love recall;
I had you such a little while,
But in my heart you'll always stay,
Look down my precious child
As I take this walk for you today.

- by Shirlie Colman Andree

MOMMY'S QUESTIONS


Did you hear me say " I Love You"

Did you feel my gentle kiss?

Did you know how much we wanted you?
Do you know how much you'll be missed?

Did you hear my prayer to heaven?
Did you hear me when I cried?

Did you feel me holding you, till the moment that you died?

Did Jesus come to get you, and take you to his home?
Did he place you on his knee, when he sat upon his throne?

Did Papaw get to see you, with his eyes all healed and new?
Does he tell you how long we waited, hoping and praying for you?

Do you grow each day in heaven?
Do you think of me at all?

Do you know I'm here waiting...
Until God's final call...

Do you know how I long to hold you?
Did you hear me say "Good Bye"

I have so many questions, and the biggest one is "WHY"

The good Lord has his reasons, though I may not understand...

One day I'll get to hold you, in a place called
Promise Land...

- by Becky Strickland

LEAH

Leah Grace,
Beautiful daughter to me
God decided he wanted you...
I had to set you free.

Prepare my heart Lord,
Prepare my mind.
Give me strength Lord,
For you know it's time...

She is here
So small....
So sweet.....

Not a sound from my baby.....
OH!  The tears that I weep!

Tiny little fingers....
Tiny little feet....

I wondered what it would be like,
When we would finally meet.

I cannot tell you how much I love you,
If you could feel my heart...
Then you would understand,
How painfully we part.

Holding you...
Seeing you....
Loving you....

All this went too fast!
I planned for a lifetime,
In a moment your lifetime passed.

Why Lord? PLEASE LORD! Help me understand.
Wrap your arms around me
For I know you have a plan.

Daylight, Darkness, Sunshine, Rain..
How I grieve for your presence
How my hearts filled with pain.

You are perfect, holy and pure
The hardships of this world,
You will not endure.

The angels must have sang
"GLORY, BE ON HIGH"
When Jesus brought you home,

To your cradle in the sky.....

Eternally,

Love Mommy

- by Becky Strickland

We are the parents of a beautiful 27 year old daughter who died leaving behind 3 precious
children, ages 1, 2, and 4. Her sudden, tragic death crated a void in our hearts and lives, and also so cruelly, division in the family also, which  has eased only through
prayer , patience and waiting...Jim and Shirley Frost


        Remembrance

Beloved images of you,
Like shooting stars light up my sky.
Unstoppable, and then they're gone, And I must lose you once again. My Darling, your mother waits for you And sends a silent kiss across a sleeping world To unknow meadows beyond the stars. Come back to me, my Darling, Come close, from star to star, to me. Mom - by Shirley Frost

My little Jonah died when he was 11 days old. The following is the poem that was on the cards at his funeral. Little Angels When God calls little children to dwell with Him above. We mortals sometime question the wisdom of His love. For no heartache compares with the death of on small child, Who does so much to make our world seem wonderful and mild. Perhaps God tires of calling the aged to His fold, So He picks a rosebud before it can grow old. God knows how much we need them and so He takes but few, To make the land of Heaven more beautiful to view. Believing this is difficult still somehow we must try, The saddest word mankind knows will always be "Good-bye." So when a little child departs we who are left behind, Must realize God loves children, Angels are hard to find. - Tiffany Roush,

Want to submit writing to In Memory e-mail:

tamy@speedline.ca