RANDOM GAME HALL OF FAME
From: Tocadisco

Biochick1

Biochick, known by many as the Queen of the Random Game, was a true champion. At a second's notice, she could play dumb like a Poodle plays dead. She is the essence of what a Random Game player should aspire to. Read and find out why. - Toca K. Disco

Entered the Random Game during the Age of Reason
Left during the Lawless Period

That's not *my* finger... (Biochick1)

No, no, no I said mongoose, NOT Mongolia! Geez! (Biochick1)

Try the fish. Mmmm. Fish. (Biochick1)

Just because someone's name is John, don't assume it's a male. It could be short for Johnarina. But really, who is named Johnarina? (Biochick1)

My father always used to say, "If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, it must be a duck." But...what if it's just a confused chicken? (Biochick1)

Gosh, I could really go for a Scooby snack right about now. (Biochick1)

If I was a guy would my screen name be Biodude? I just don't know. (Biochick1)

Please don't smell the screen. (Biochick1)

I just wanted to let everyone know it wasn't this past July 4th that I lost my virginity. It was 1987. Which would make next 4th my ten year anniversity. I'm letting you know in advance so you have a whole year to think of a suitable present for me. Chocolate is always good. (Biochick1)

My favorite color is puce. (Biochick1)

Y'know, just cause someone can spell, doesn't make him a good speller. Oh wait, I guess it does. (Biochick1)

If my boyfriend was a girl, that would make me a lesbian, wouldn't it? (Biochick1)

If my left breast and right breast switched places do you think anyone would notice? (Biochick1)

My parents call pot "grass." I think it dates them, but I guess it's okay. (Biochick1)

The ones you like don't like you and the ones that like you, you don't like. It's just so damn wrong. (Biochick1)

I guess my dream really is to be a ballerina. (Biochick1)

Just what the heck is the Alt key for, anyway? Alone it doesn't do anything. It's kind of like the Tom Arnold of the keyboard. (Biochick1)

Listen, all -- YOU DO NOT HAVE TO WRITE YOUR NAME WHEN SUBMITTING AN ENTRY! Heckler's has this magic device that automatically lets them know who sends mail. I know, it's tough to believe, but it really does work, everytime! I am not putting my name down, but look, it's still here -----> (Biochick1)

I am making it my mission in life to find the person who first wrote 'kewl', hunt them down and hurt them...badly. Now wouldn't that be "kewl"? (Biochick1)

I'm hooked on phonics. It's really, really bad. I start to go into withdrawl when I can't have it...GIVE ME MY PHONICS!! GIVE ME THEM!!! (Biochick1)

I think it would be kind of funny to call a few things by the wrong names for the sake of confusing your child. For example, if from day one you decide to call a "potato" "dinosaur" then the child would actually think that was its name. The fun would really begin one day when the child was out at a friend's house and they were having steak and potatoes for dinner and the kid said, "These are delicious dinosaurs, Mrs. Smith." (Biochick1)

My favorite flavor jelly bean is buttered popcorn. But I feel bad for the black ones, because no one eats them. (Biochick1)

Oh Random Game, Jack Handey would be proud. (Biochick1)

I wish they all could be California raisins. (Biochick1)

Touch my monkey. (Biochick1)

Y'know, sometimes you got it, and sometimes you don't, but it really doesn't matter with the Random Game. And that's pretty much the beauty of it all. (Biochick1)

Hey, you out there, faithfully reading the random results to see if your entry is up there. It's not? Shafted again? Gosh, if all this stuff makes it up here week after week, and yours doesn't, you really must be as pathetic as you fear. HA HA HA!! (Biochick1)

I'm real Tocadisco. Realer than you'll ever be (I have no idea what that means). (Biochick1)

Hey, you know that "Tocadisco" means "Touch a record"? Hmmmmm. (I have no idea what that means.) (Biochick1)

Am I a prognosticator or what? Here I write about Jack Handey, and just a few lines later, comes our buddy WLW, with some Handisms. (For all of you poor unenlightened souls out there, Jack Handey is the "Deep Thoughts" guy. Remember on SNL, "Deep thoughts...by Jack Handey" and then the pretty music with the pretty scene). So, Troub, what's the deal? Ran out of clever things to say on your own? I know, I know, it's tough having to come up with
witticisms, day after day, but Troub, YOU ARE BETTER THAN THAT! Jack Handey should be coning to you for inspiration, not the other way around. So put down your little book and put on your thinking cap. We're all routing for you out here! (Biochick1)

Y'know Tocadisco, it hurts, it really hurts that you don't think I'm real. Sure, I try to be cool and sly and cocky, but inside I'm just a scared little girl, holding on to reality like a 16 year-old boy holds on to the VCR control when he's watching a porno movie and his parents are home. And here, you come along and make me question myself. For if the all-knowing Tocadisco doubts my existence, maybe I *really* don't exist. What right do you
have to make me question my very being? As if life on this spinning globe isn't tough enough. Damn you Tocadisco, damn you. (Biochick1)

I don't eat garlic because I like it. I do it to scare off the vampires away. (Biochick1)

Books not to buy:
Biochick1's Efective Spelling Tips
WLW Troub's guide to dating
Tocadisco's Existential Treatise
The Story of Sporq
How to Pick a Good AOL Name - by ELYN42
Humor Through Repetion - Heckler X
(Biochick1)-

Y'know what? (Biochick1)

Chicken butt. (Biochick1)

When we were young, my brother and I used to play a simple little game called "I can be annoying." The rules were fairly simple, in fact there was really only one rule. The person who was the annoyer would chant, "I can be annoying. I can be annoying. I can be annoying." over and over and over again. It worked especially well when the annoyee was five minutes from the end of their favorite tv show.

Maybe on some level, I enjoy the random game because it lets me relive my youth. (Biochick1)

I CAN BE ANNOYING! ICAN BE ANNOYING! I CAN BE ANNOYING! I CAN BE ANNOYING! I CAN BE ANNOYING! I CAN BE ANNOYING! (Biochick1)

I would just like to say that I wrote that last entry without using the edit key, I actually typed out each letter. I did however, use the "Caps Lock" button, so if that makes me a cheater, so be it. (Biochick1)

So, let me get this straight. The culling has occured, and it's just me and MagicClams left? Okay, I'll bring the beer, you bring the nachos and we'll meet on the top of the Empire State building. Let's bring some eggs too so we can throw them off the roof...and some pennies so we can see if it's really true if you throw a penny off a high building it can kill someone (although everyone will already be dead, so nix that). I hope you play cards,
because it could get kind of boring. Okay, let the culling begin! (I like the word culling, it kind of reminds me of gyrating gals on SoulTrain. No, not really.) (Biochick1)

Tocadisco - I send you a poem, written from pain and sorrow and you post it for all the world to see? What kind of heartless monster are you? Geez, give a guy a little credit for comin' up with a dang "Three line novel" topic and he becomes a madman. You've hurt me for the last time Toca. (Biochick1)

Hey - do you get sour cream from cows in the bitter barns? (Biochick1)

Y'know why? (Biochick1)

Chicken thigh. (Biochick1)

My father went threw a stage where he thought the "Chicken butt" joke was the essence of humor. He went on and on with variations of theme ("Can I ask you one thing?" "Chicken wing!!"). Finally my brother begged him to stop. My father said, "Well, can I just make one last request?" "What," answered Lew, "Chicken breast!" How we laughed and laughed and laughed. (Biochick1)

In case anyone got confused and said, "Hey who's that Lew guy?" -- my brother's name is Lew. Just wanted to clear up any potential confusion. (Biochick1)

You're welcome. (Biochick1)

Is it just me, or are the dirth of top ten lists becoming annoying? (Now, I don't mean, is it just ME that's annoying...I mean is it just me that's annoyed. You're welcome.) Especially ones that AREN'T FUNNY. (I'm not mentioning any names though, SourSoda.) (Biochick1)

I think (maybe) that I (might) use too many parathetesis (boy is THAT spelled wrong!). But (really) they are so much fun (and not just to write, but to read as well! [I have no idea what that means]). (Did you all catch the double one? Pretty tricky huh?)

One caveat - be very, very, very careful not to get lost. And I personally find it inexcusable when someone starts a parathesis but doesn't close it (like this (Biochick1)

) (Biochick1)

I need closure. (Biochick1)

MagicClams (oh excuse, me, I mean Senor Itchy) you're not really a 16-year old guy are you (and if you are, shouldn't you be starting down the road of chemical dependency and denial in a slower vehicle like, say beer, rather than the Porsche of Kentucky Bourbon? Oh, by the way, when you get to the V in the road, and you can take - Smack St. or Weed Way, tell that guy Jimbo there "Jo says hey!") ? And here my friend, Troub (identity stealer
though he may try to be) is 17. What is going on here? I'm "hanging out" with high school boys. I haven't hung out with highschool boys since...well..since high school. Please, please tell me I'm not the oldest person here. Or that there's at least someone in their 20s! Ooooh, my arthritis is acting up...and the goiter...the goiter's killing me...and my eyes...I CAN'T SEE SO GOOD (should I bring all my shoes?!). (Biochick1)

Hey Tocadisco, I was never good at minature dissection. So your tool is safe (I can hear the collective sigh of girls across this great nation of our's. "AAhhhh, Tocadisco's love poker is safe. Thank God!!"). And if I was a guy, I would NEVER have a lame name (little rhyme for y'all out there) like Herbert. Gosh, that would be like having a name like, umm...I don't know...like...Tocadisco! (Biochick1)

I know what's going to happen here, and I'm frightened. Really, really scared. For some inane reason, people have decided that I am "cool" and "funny" and "smart" (I mean, I am, but no more than anyone of you out there! C'mon, we're all special people. We all walk under shining stars. Don't go changing. Did you ever know that you're MY hero? I BELIEVE the children are our future. Ohhh, margarania.) Anyway, the reason this concerns me is because
I know human nature (Hey, little digression...did anyone see "In the Line of Fire" at the end when Clint Eastwood said, "I know pidgeons." Yeah, that was funny. Hey, that reminds me of when Chris Farley does his SNL schtick when he "interviews" celebrities and asks them questions like, "Remember, remember when you were attacked by the giant squid and you stabbed it. That was cool. " and then hits his forehead. Okay, I am now about to exit the
parathesis, please go back to before they began so you can remember where we were.) and when people build someone up, inevitably, they will be torn down. So, this week I'm in. Next week it'll be, "Hey, y'know that Biochick is kind of annoying. I mean, she thinks she's so cool. God, she uses all those stupid parathesis - ya can hardly even read her posts! And her spelling, geez, my blind monkey can spell better than her." So, let's not go there.
Please, I beg of you. My poor little heart just couldn't take it to see you wonderful people turn on me. It would break me. I'd be an emotional cripple. Please, let's stop the madness. I beg of you. Look, I'm down on my knees...(I figured all you highschool boys could go sick on that one! You're welcome.) (Biochick1)

I think it may have been WLW who brought up the subject of palindromes awhile back. I always thought the word "palindrome" should be a palindrome. (Biochick1)

How annoyed do you think anyone whose name is "Kenneth" gets when some wisenheimer asks him, "What's the frequency Kenneth?" (Biochick1)

If I was Kenneth, I'd belt him one, good. (Biochick1)

But, maybe Kenneth is just a scrawny little guy. Poor Kenneth. (Biochick1)

He'd try and change his name to Ken, but then, of course, he'd get the "Barbie and Ken" jokes. Kids can be so cruel. (Biochick1)

I was thinking, we all should get together. Then I realized the power we could unleash together and I thought, "The rest of the world, just couldn't handle it, BAYBEE!" (Cause sometimes I like to call myself, BAYBEE.) (Biochick1)
When's the last time you hugged a total stranger? Oh, wait, wasn't it right before you got arrested for assault? Never mind. (Biochick1)

My brother once did LSD in Central Park and took off all of his clothes and walked around the city naked. He was picked up by the NYPD and they called my Mom. They said, "Your son was walking around NY naked claiming to be Jesus Christ." and my mom said, "But we're Jewish!" I think she may have been in shock. (Biochick1)

That's not one of the prouder moments in our family's history. (Biochick1)

Tocadisco - The only way I can bear the thought of not seeing you on a daily (nay, hourly) basis is by convincing myself that we are not meant to be. So, I try to pretend I don't want you, don't need you, don't care. But you have broken me out of my world of lies. You have made me say, "Life is not worth living if I cannnot be honest with myself and others about this raging inferno of passion I have for Tocadisco." Please, please forgive my
false protests of your love. Let's be together, Tocadisco. I cannot bear another moment without you, my sweet. (Biochick1)

Oh Leonard, let's have a tea party. Us gals need to stick together in this raging sea of testoserone. Mmmmm...testosterone. (Biochick1)

The maragrina song frightens me. I don't know why. (Biochick1)

"Disco Stu doesn't need to advertise." (Biochick1)

Y'know what's wrong with America these days? Not enough taffy pulls. (Biochick1)

Do Eskimos REALLY kiss by rubbing noses? I've always been astounded by that one. Does that mean a brown-noser would have a sh*t-eating grin? (Biochick1)


Remember the old commercial, "Wednesday is Sunday at Carvel?" That commercial realigned my entire sense of cosmic order. For if Wednesday was Sunday, Thursday was Monday, Friday was Tuesday, and Saturday was Wednesday (but wasn't that really Sunday?). By the way, that "Wednesday is Sunday" thing didn't fly too well with truant officers. (Biochick1)

Damn you, Tom Carvel, Damn you! (Biochick1)

My epidermis is showing. (Biochick1)

Get a life, Casper! (Biochick1)

Pass the turkey! (Biochick1)

Chelsea Clinton is looking at colleges. Can you imagine being her roommate? I bet you'd get a little nervous taking phone messages from her folks. (Biochick1)

Y'know Alanis' song, "Isn't it ironic?" Well, none of those things are actually ironic (with the exception of the plane crash thing). They all just suck. But I guess "Isn't it sucky?" isn't such a good song title. (Biochick1)

Is the world MagicClam's oyster? (Biochick1)

Gee, that Biochick2 girl is cool. Wish I could be more like her. (Biochick1)
I don't like fudge. I do, however, like Fudgicles. Go figure. (Biochick1)

And what is up with all these questions starting with "and"? (Biochick1)

"...the likes of..." -- as if. (Biochick1)

I think the word passe, has become passe. Now that's ironic. (Biochick1)

A poem in progress:
PRO
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Wordplays are fun
And so are you!
GRESS (Biochick1)

Don't ever say to a cop, "You can't arrest me." Because they can, and will. I learned the hard way. (Biochick1)

Ever need a sure-fire date ender? "I've got to go and pick up that foot odor cream," seems to work. Of course, you may be going out with a foot fetisher (not a word, but it should be) and that would only excite them more. But life is full of those little risks. (Biochick1)

Frogs frogs frogs. Everywhere frogs. Ribbit. Ribbit. Frogs. (Biochick1)

You don't really have to bow down to me. Just some chocalate would be nice. (Biochick1)

"Man go by some mango!" If I was in charge of US Mango sales, that would be the slogan. I think sales would really increase. People like word play, you know. (Biochick1)

Wanna heare something funny? When I saw "Biochick2" I was a little frightened. Who is this identity taker? I then went to make up a new screen name and took "Biochick." (You see, when I first started on AOL, back in the 70s, I was a little naive. I thought that your screen name HAD to be eight letters long -- hence Biochick1. I was so young, so naive, but I digress). Anyway, "Biochick" had NEVER been taken. So, Biochick2, just imagine, you could
have taken "Biochick" and then people might actually think you were the original. But because of your lack of thinking your evil scheme through, you are destined to remain a "2". So sad. So very sad. And, FYI - I have not played the Three Line Novel game, I have been the subject of a very disturbed little biography. So get the facts straight, missy. (Biochick1)

SewerDude - the sHOw me game is the best game goin'. Long live HO Truman! (Biochick1)

When I say "selfish egomania" you know I mean that in the very best way, with all the love in my little heart. (Biochick1)

Hey WLW -- where the heck are you? I miss my Larry the Liver stories. I enjoy the pancreas and all its juices (mmmmm juices). My name is, after all, *Bio*chick. And that doesn't mean bionic, baby! (Biochick1)

Sometimes, a guy will tell you he likes you when he really doesn't just to get you to sleep with him. Go ahead and sleep with him. You don't like him either. (Biochick1)

Has anyone ever noticed that some deodorants have directions on them. 1) Lift cap 2) Apply under arms. LIFT CAP?! What kind of idiot needs to be told that? The same kind that needs to be told on their Halloween costume that "Wearing this supeman cape does not allow the wearer to fly." People scare me. (Biochick1)

Ourself, you have taught me a lot about myself and my beliefs. As I was reading your posts, I imagined you as a guy. And then you spoke of your boyfriend, and I realized you were a gal (unless, of course, you are gay, which if you are I think you should use the slogan 'We're gay. Yah. Yah.'). I realized that I have preconceived notions of what a "man" is and what a "woman" is. And they are based upon nothing, truly nothing! For are we not all
"ourself." And with her screen name, Ourself, points that out, deeply yet calmy. Kudos to Ourself, kudos! (Biochick1)

BabyLamms and Tocadisco -- choosers of topics for three line novels. Two weeks in a row, members of our own little family have been chosen! Let's put our hands together for them! Congratulations, guys! (Biochick1)

Now wait just one second. SewerDude has too many letters, too. What is up with that, armpit boy? (Biochick1)

Wallaby16 - So nice to have you back. Something was missing all summer, I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but it was you (not that I would want to put my finger on you, sheesh). Wallaby16, also is the artistic genius, PeAcEout. Check out her drawings in the RG archives. (Biochick1)

If a bunch of Poles made a spotted dress while dancing, would it be polka dotted? (Biochick1)

Excuse me all, I meant nine letters - not eight. Apologies go out especially to SewerDude, who I claimed had too many letters in his name to be "real." I'm sorry, really, really sorry. (Biochick1)

JaneDoe - don't let the man tell you what to do! If you want to pick your nose in public, by all means, pick away! Social norm moscial shnorms. Rules schmules. You know what I'm sayin', sister! (Biochick1)

WLW gone? Say it isn't so, for the love of God, say it isn't so! (Biochick1)

I have sad, sad news. Moments after I wrote my fond farewell to WLW, our system's administrator came over to me and told me that I am getting upgraded to Windows95 and will now have my own personal e-mail (through the company network and not through AOL). However, I will no longer have access to the modem, which means that I will no longer have AOL on my computer at work. So, I will no longer be around. I may still have an account (We'll see how
long my company continues paying) and be able to sign on occasionally as a guest. Or, I may convince my roommate to put AOL on her computer. Either way, though, I will no longer be a regular poster. So sad. So sad. I'll miss you all, and if anyone wants my new email address, e-mail Tocadisco and he'll forward your message to me and if I decide you are not a psycho maniac, I'll give it to you. Goodbye, good luck, and best wishes for you all!!
(Biochick1)

Leeches suck. (Biochick1)

Tocadisco and I had a nice on-line conversation today (although he does have this annoying habit of changing the background color). Anyway, we got into a little debate. He said, "Hey, Bugalow Bill, who did you kill..." I then said, "BUNGALOW Bill?! Uh-uh pally boy, it's BUFFALO Bill!" We argued back and forth for about ten lines until Toca, through the world of cybermagic took me to a Beatles sight ("The White Album") and I indeed saw he was
right. I'm sorry I doubted your musical ability Mr. Tocadisco. My humble apologies. (Biochick1)

That said, what the hell is goin' on with this panda sham? (Biochick1)

Gee you all ::wiping a tear from my eye:: I really missed you. Although the time apart was brief, for me it was a lifetime (and by that I do not mean the cable station, although I do enjoy their programming). I see some new faces here, I see some old ones too. I hope you meet me and I hope I will meet you. I like our big happy RG family. Yeah, and if that's a crime, then color me guilty! (Biochick1)