The Age Of Deviled Eggs

PTSNIPES asked for it, and he got it. That, or he caught me in a lazier mood than usual. Anyway, I'll just hope he wasn't accusing me.

Subject: Re: Planet Snipeywood
From: PTSNIPES
I think the next age for the RG winner's should be The Age Of Deviled Eggs, cause, well, this place is starting to reek.
I'll also give him 15 tokens for the suggestion, so that there's 15 less tokens I have to give to the rest of you this week.

The first winner this week is IGiveIn who gets 15 tokens, not specifically for this post, but because one way or another I figured the Wise Asses would find it amusing.
Subject: Re: Tova Party
From: IGiveIn
{order husband.}

I'm sorry, but that's an oxymoron.

And now for even more 15-token winners.
Subject: Re: Carc's Colorful Cache of Comedy
From: Carcazoid
The way I see it, there are two categories of birds:

1. Hummingbirds

2. The ones that know all the words.
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Subject: Re: TV tip
From: Ozma22
>>Once me and my firends were watching "Speed" and I paused the movie when bus was half way across jumpping gap and sent them home, so that will never know what happened.(Atkar)>>

I saw Speed dubbed into Hebrew while I was in Israel. Funny thing is, we watched it during a bus trip and the driver was watching too. And if I didn't know what Israeli drivers were like I'd swear he thought it was a training video.
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Subject: The Gorey details
From: MitchRK
A is for Astronia, who put a fork in the toaster.
B is for Bloodguilt, who watched cannibals roast her.
C is for Carcazoid, who fell from a tower.
D is for Despina, who breathed CO for an hour.
E is for Elmo, who froze in a meat locker.
F is for FiNOH, who broke his neck playing soccer.
G is for Granmajong, who swam with a shark.
H is for HO Myrrh, who vanished in Central Park.
I is for I Porpoise, who fell on a machete.
J is for Jlbkwrm, who choked on spaghetti.
K is for Khaleth, who drove into a pole.
L is for Lavoris, who ignored a mole.
M is for MitchRK, who was burned at the stake.
N is for Nyello, whose surgeon made a mistake.
O is for Odaeyss, who sneezed out his brains.
P is for Pia, who played "chicken" with trains.
Q is for Quakerjak*, who expired from pneumonia.
R is for RUGGEDCEC, who was holding hands with Astronia.
S is for SGood, who tripped a land mine.
T is for TyleredOne, who drank poisoned wine.
U is for USAmen, who was darted to death.
V is for Volfie, who rode with Khaleth.
W is for WISE ASSES, who all died of shame.
X is for XFoTwenny, who went up in a flame.
Y is for Yucca Bugg, who got lost and was speared.
Z is for Zornog, who just disappeared.

*I know it's spelled wrong, so sue me. You try to find a "Q" name in this game.

MitchRK's Alphabet Flash Cards, coming to a nursery school near you; hey it's no less wholesome than the Tale of Hansel and Gretel.

All right, who gets 25 tokens? Who haven't I given tokens to in a couple weeks? Of those, who hasn't pointed that fact out to me? I think it leaves Goo.
Subject: Re: Newstyle, Freestyle, Random Jamdom!!!
From: SGood42
Goo's 1998 Predictions:
Bobbi Ann McCaughey A.K.A The Septuplets Mom, will refuse an anonymous offer of money to corrext her nasty-ass snaggleteeth, saying the shards in her mouth are a "miracle straight from God"
* * * *
Subject: Re: Newstyle, Freestyle, Random Jamdom!!!
From: SGood42
Goo's 1998 Predictions:
After tiredlessly draggin his ass across, and eating portions of, the White House lawn, the Clintons' new pup Buddy will come inside and vomit on the carpet of the Oval Office. USA TODAY will publish a page-one, full-color graph analyzing the event.

Lumping two newbies together, Atani7 and Max51284 both get 20 tokens. Even though it seems Max has made one post and then abandoned the game, both managed to epitomize an earlier time in the Random Game, while not being ridiculed for doing so.
Subject: Re: Time Warp
From: Atani7
A constant question I'm always trying to answer is what if people in our future are traveling back into our past and changing it? I mean, what if we all woke up one morning and there was no such thing as an airplane but we didn't consider it unusual because it'd be as if it were never invented... Spooky thought, huh?

If this were possible, I would set my priorities straight- first go back and teach Steve Cases parents abstinence; and then go to the future, find out how all my friends are going to die, then keep pestering them with vague hints.
Of course just out of curiosity, I think I'd go back and kill the person who invented the time machine before they even thought about it and watch a rip in the time-continuum form before my eyes....Oh, how I miss armageddon!
* * * *
Subject: AAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! REAL MONSTERS !!!
From: Max51284
Okay, so im watching tv this show called AAGGHH REAL MONSTERS !!! comes on. And im thinking what kind of show is called AAGGHH REAL MONSTERS !!! Then the show starts I look up,(cause you know i was thinking) and im like AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH REAL MONSTERS !!!!!!

15 tokens to Sal and Tova. I find this first post amusing because I've concluded that the only way she'd think of it is if she really did it. It somehow makes all of us who read the Random Game feel like we're actually accomplishing something with our time, doesn't it? Not something useful, mind you, but something.
Subject: Re: Sal's Caprice.
From: DrSalina
Sal's Late Night Hobby #1:

ULing rather large files to herself, turning on her Internet Insant Messager, and IMing her AOL account to slow down the UL.
* * * *
Subject: Re: Mall Horror
From: DrSalina
>>The scary part is everyone probably is just like they're imagined to be.<<(Bob)
>>Yes, I'm really a color-changing dragon who goes to college. Uh-huh. Of course.>>(Khaleth)

I believe it. I have friends who are pondscum sucking pack rats and attend college.
* * * *
Subject: Re: Tova Party
From: Tova100
I damn just realized that everything sounds so much damn better if you put damn before it.
* * * *
Subject: Re: Tova Party
From: Tova100
AHHHHHHHHH! I HATE AOL!

Not only is it my birthday and I'm having to do HOMEWORK, the internet site that I'm plagerizing from decides to "time out".

DAMN IT!

10 tokens to Conade, Stotan, and SoupEater, along with a separate congratulatory message to SoupEater for making a spelling related reply and actually spelling everything correct in it.
Subject: Re: ArtKity's Kity Korner
From: SoupEater
>>which would the store clerk probably axcept?<<

So that's what you do when you don't know whether to use "accept" or "except?" Cool.
* * * *
Subject: New Years Spirit
From: Conade
On January first, it's funny if you comment: "I haven't showered since. . . last year!"
It's not that funny, however, on June first.
* * * *
Subject: Re: Surgery?
From: Stotan9876
<<~~~ Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery ~~~>>mystopia

Quite frankly I don't want to hear anything during surgery, because that means that the anaesthesia isn't working.

Close to winning tokens this week, but failing the final cut, was Shiela for the "I hate the Random Game" banner in her signature. But leave it to me to find the first funny thing she posts hidden in the area of posts I don't reward.

Nevertheless, you see how my sense of humor was malfunctioning this week. Knowing that, you'll have no problem accepting Kat and Zornog as the winners of 30 tokens for these posts, and these posts alone.
Subject: Re: Poor Sonny
From: The Kat 4u
>>First Michael, now Sonny. When the hell are they gonna cut down that tree?>>sdl

no way, that's darwin's tree...
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Subject: Re: Zornog's Thread of Amusing and/or Entertaining Thoughts
From: ANT Zornog
In a message dated 98-01-10 11:10:56 EST, God writes:

AOL sux.

Thanks to Zornog for reposting that, I missed it the first time. And, since I wouldn't dare upstage God's words, I'll just end here. Congrats to the winners.