BEFORE AND AFTER YOU GET MARRIED
B- you take my breath away
A- i feel like I'm suffocating
B- twice a night
A- twice a month
b- she says she loves the way i take control of a situation
a- she called me a controlling, manipulative, egomaniac
b- Saturday night fever
a- Monday night football
b- he makes me feel like a million dollars
a- if I had a dime for every stupid thing he's done...
b- don't stop
a- don't start
b- the sound of music
a- the sound of silence
b- is that all your having?
a- maybe you should have just a salad, honey
b- its like I'm living in a dream
a- its like he lives in a dorm
b- $60/doz. roses
a- $1.50/stem rose
b- we agree on everything
a- doesn't she have a mind of her own?
b- feathers and handcuffs
a- ball and chain
b- idol
a- idle
b- i love a woman with curves
a- i never said you were fat
b- he's completely lost without me
a- why won't he ever ask for directions?
b- time stood still
a- this relationship is going nowhere
b- blind
a- nearsighted
b- you look so seductive in black
a- your clothes are so depressing
b- i can hardly believe we found each other
a- i can't believe i ended up with someone like you
b- passion
a- ration
Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage.....the "y" becomes silent.
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.
My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I got two girlfriends.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
The honeymoon is over when the husband calls home to say he'll be late for dinner and the answering machine says it is in the microwave.
My girlfriend ran away with my best friend and I really miss him !!
When two's company, three's the result !
A dress is like a barbed fence; It protects the premises
without restricting the view !
Being sexy is a hard job for me; But somebody has to do it!!
Love is photogenic; It needs darkness to develop.
A good discussion is like a miniskirt; Short enough to pertain >interest and long enough to cover the subject !
Children in backseats cause accidents; Accidents in backseats cause children !
Seven days on honeymoon make one hole weak.
Man who have hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
Short man who dance with tall woman get bust in mouth.
Woman who go to man's apartment for snack may get tit bit.
Woman who spends much time on bedspring, may have offspring.
Passionate kiss like spider web, lead to undoing of fly.
Virginity is like balloon, one prick and it is all gone.
Girls should not marry basketball players, they dribble before
they shoot.
© NIMESH SHAH 1999
THERE SURE IS A 
HERE
YOUR DESTINY LIES IN YOUR 
DON'T BELIEVE ME. CHECK IT OUT.
THIS IS TO 
GO BACK