Why I Am a Millwright

Everybody needs to find a job that fits them. When I was a kid I looked at a lot of different jobs and here is what I found out about millwrights.

When millwrights go hunting they generally get bigger deer than most folks do. When they go fishing they generally catch so many fish that their arms get tired from reeling them in.

Millwrights tend to be better looking than the average. This means they have better social lives than almost anybody else. Some folks from a university did a study and found that millwrights get lucky about 43 times as often as most folks. At least that's what I heard.

Millwrights almost always have better-looking spouses, smarter kids, greener lawns, redder roses and generally seem to halve fewer weeds in the garden. Their cars seem to run a little faster and use a little less gas. Things generally seem to work better for a millwright than they do for the rest of the world.

Millwrights do things that no one else can do. They live and excel in a world where things too small to see make a big difference. They possess special skills and unique knowledge.

Millwrights do real work in a world full of made up stuff. Millwrights make real things like machines and tools and a better world.

Millwrights tend to be more honest, better friends and slightly better adjusted than the world in general. It comes from making a career in a professional world of exacting specifications and real deadlines. It seems to show in their character.

Millwrights just generally seem to be clearly superior human beings, which is why I am a millwright. That and all the good jobs were taken.