RAW DATA INCORPORATED

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RAW D.I.T Neil kempen crashed his bike today into a car driven by much loved actress and supermodel PAM ANDERSON. "That fool hit me with enough force to bounce me out of my (Convertible) car and on to it's trunk!. "I hate Neil Kempen", said the sultry Bawatch star. "A little bit farther, and swoosh!" the Supermodel added, "and I would have landed smack in front of an oncoming truck". Pamela told police "what upset me the most out of this whole incident was that silly smirk on his stupid face". "I swear to you he thought the whole thing was fun and games and all part of Training for RIDE ALBERTA TO WASHINGTON, a bike ride in the Canadian Rockies. "That moron shouldn't be directing school kids across the street, much less an international Bike Ride". Said the Model.
RAW Director and colorfully dressed cyclist ED DRUIN, explained to authorities. "Neil is the Director-in-Training, not the Director, and If I'm allowed to speak for the record, I've never met the guy."
Immediately after the car/bike accident, Neil got back onto his bike and hurried away at break-neck speeds. The following day, City Police and Pam Anderson, then dressed in a smart looking white pants suit, worked together and apprehended the culprit about six miles further down the road. "It was for this type of criminal that they came up with the idea of throwing away the key", said beautiful Pam Anderson, "I'm telling Tommy to beat the crap out of him if he ever walks the street again", "I simply must, I broke a nail!"
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"A little bit farther, and swoosh!" the Supermodel added, "and I would have landed smack in front of an oncoming truck!".
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"what upset me the most out of this whole incident was that silly smirk on his stupid face". "I swear to you he thought the whole thing was fun and games and all part of Training for RIDE ALBERTA TO WASHINGTON
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