WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

How many times have you sat in the pub arguing with your mates about the possible whereabouts of Boro stars of the past? Right, well we're going to tell you anyway. Our exciting new feature will keep you bang up to date with the careers of many a Boro favourite.

1. Mikkel Beck

Many Boro fans will have fond memories of Mikkel. Strong in the air, fast on the ground, two great feet and deadly in front of goal he was guaranteed to have the crowd ringing out his name every time he played. But since leaving the Riverside little has been heard of the burly striker. Rumours are circulating that the man dubbed 'The Great Dane' by Alistair Brownose is still playing professional football. However, BADN could find little evidence to support this. Indeed, several Nottingham Forest and Derby County supporters that we spoke to claimed that the idea was preposterous. There are also unconfirmed reports that following the expulsion of their Argentinian striker due to passport irregularities, Pride Park officials have reported Beck to immigration officials on the off-chance.

Mikkel Beck – Wanted by police for impersonating a footballer.

NEXT ISSUE: PAUL GASCOIGNE

Oh…apparently he's stilll at the Boro…Alan Moore?……what?, you're joking!

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?