Once upon a time, while flying out over Crystal Lake, Wilbur a rather handsome Canadian Goose noticed some activity occurring along the banks of his and his tribes favorite haunt. As Wilbur meticulously sought out a safe place to land, his attention was continually drawn to the activity. Unable to concentrate in his task at hand, he decided to fly around and take a look.

Wilbur flew over the lake to the rather distinguished and knowledgeable Nature Mary’s lodge. Nature Mary’s is a favorite spot for him and the rest for she always had the most wonderful food for him and his crew. Often times he and the gang would sit on the lake in front of her lodge, listening silently as her melodious voice would float over the lake singing "Love and Nature make the World Go ‘Round" and whatever song would strike her fancy. Yes, Wilbur and his friends loved Nature Mary. She was always good to them.

Next, Wilbur found his way over to Loegler Lodge, a strange place where they housed strange creatures many referred to as "adult male staff". Listening closely, he could hear the sounds of snoring emitting from the cabin followed by some maniac assistant waterfront director who would continually scream out the time. Usually, no one inhabited that building, even during the day. It would just sit there, in the sun, quietly awaiting the evening arrival of its inhabitants. This too, was a nice place for Wilbur and his friends.

Wait a minute, a hum, a pith helmet, Wilbur felt a shudder run through his body.

Shaking it off, as he couldn’t quite put a feather on why that combination bothered him so, he gently wafted down to the Waterfront.

Waterfront, what a glorious place to see. There was this beautiful, gorgeous waterfront director that he decided to nickname the Water Goddess. Yes, she was a delightful one, always threatening bodily harm to those that worked for her especially when they would use that stupid phrase, "I’m gonna jack you up!" Wilbur had no doubt that one day, she would hurt, badly, the next person that said that to her. In the meantime, she consistently directed her lifeguards to get to work. Once in a while you would hear her screaming at Luke to leave Andy alone or telling them that if they didn’t do something she asked she would "just have to kill them." Daily, Wilbur would watch DJ and Luke take out a boat or canoe to glide gracefully over the lake. Yet he could never understand why everytime they took a boat out they would return to shore with it filled with water. Strange. Wilbur liked Kollin, the Water Goddesses assistant. He was organized, punctual, and always managed to get things done in a timely fashion. The water Goddess always told him he was anal retentive but, as Wilbur didn’t know exactly what that meant, he figured it must be a good thing. Dave was a nice mortal to, a little on the dark and morbid side. He seemed to enjoy nailing things called oars as well as hanging out in the guard boat. Wilbur loved to eavesdrop on him because the things he said always left confusion on the faces of many of the lifeguards. The Water Goddess, would always secretly smile. She always knew what David was talking about.

Wait, a hum, a pith helmet, that shudder again. Wilbur decided to move on, quickly.

The Dining Hall was an interesting place. There always seemed to be something going on in there and the yummy smells that emitted from there made Wilbur’s stomach growl as he anxiously anticipated the pickings later that evening that would find themselves in Nature Mary’s compost pile. Joyce was a great cook except when she would fry her brain, or as she put it "my brine is frayed." Al was another one that Wilbur enjoyed listening to, especially when he would tell people that "people who live in glass houses. . . .get dressed in the basement." How all of them laughed that day. The boys that worked in the kitchen all seemed to like each other, at least when Joyce was around. Steven, Matt, and John always seemed to be mopping and throwing water out the back door. Jennifer was the most fun though, she would yell at the boys to get to work and then sit down and watch. Now, that’s the way to supervise. Occasionally, Joyce would sneak to the back porch and inhale deeply on a stick in her mouth. A thin line of smoke would waft into the air as she visibly calmed down.

Wait, a hum, a pith helmet, that shudder again. It must have bothered Joyce as much as Wilbur because she hurriedly crushed out her stick and ran for the kitchen doors. Wilbur decided to move on.

Doing a figure eight over the parade field he would see Crystal and Jeff running all over the place. Crystal always looked fresh as a daisy while Jeff huffed and puffed and sweated. Crystal was a master at games; Wilbur especially liked Cubopoly and the way she kept control of her sisters by enforcing that curfew. Yes, Crystal was going to lead many people some day.

Wait that hum, the pith helmet, the shudder. Oh no, there goes poor Jeff, more sweat intended for him. Wilbur noticed that he shuddered too, he wondered why.

Over in the distance, Wilbur noticed the handicraft lodge. Dawn worked there sometimes with Adam, sometimes with Lisa, sometimes with Matt. Often Wilbur would hear strange words coming out of the lodge as Dawn hit the table with a hammer or pounded on a piece of leather. The words sounded like venting or rather maybe the leather was getting the best of poor Dawn, Wilbur didn’t know. What he did know is Dawn was very smart, as she would consistently ask people, "Do I look stupid?" No one dared answer her for they all knew she wasn’t. Wilbur especially liked how she would disappear with Tracy on closing nights as the thought of chicken made them both nauseous. That’s what he liked about Dawn and the water Goddess. Neither one of them would think of eating the flesh of his own kin, at least on closing nights.

Wilbur hovered over Casey’s area next. He was always tying ropes and disappearing from the camp from time to time. People would say he was going to find a "real job." It must have been hard to find because he seemed to be looking for it all the time. Wilbur’s favorite time was on the nights Casey would get ready to go sleep on the hill across from Camp. He would pray for rain and it would never come. Then a vein would leap out of his neck and he shouted curses at the sun for shining. Poor Casey. Maybe one day, no one would force him to try to cook spaghetti over an open flame or lead a pack of wild munchkins into the woods for twenty-four hours. Wilbur could only hope.

Wait, that hum, that pith helmet, that shudder again. What was that?! Wilbur decided to move on again, even more quickly.

Next, he flew over the BB gun and Archery ranges, there was Gary, talking about safety while Scotty handed out bows and arrows, secretly hoping someone would take him away from this place of targets and boredom. He prayed daily to do maintenance or at least to visit dawn in the handicraft lodge. They seemed to like each other as they spent lots of time together. Scotty was a neat guy. Tracy would always beg him to tell stories, and poor Scotty would laugh so hard he’d have to take his inhaler. Gary was the quiet one of the two. He would sit back and listen to everyone but when the rest of the camp inhabitants would least expect it, he would let fly with a zinger comment that would take everyone by surprise. Gary always was nice to Wilbur and his friends, maybe because he never saw much of them.

Finally Wilbur glided over the main office building. There sat Wayne and John, the program director and the camp director. They would sit on the porch while Wayne would talk, usually consulting some book he called his brain and John would sweep. John swept all the time, morning, noon, and night. Wayne would leave his things lying all over and John would pick them up. Wilbur liked Wayne because he was a big gigantic kid at heart and always had neat things in his pocket. This particular day Wayne was talking to Maureen, the nurse, and Holly the office clerk. Maureen was yelling at Wayne to slow down and take it easy. Then she would holler at John to take care of his leg. Then Wayne would yell at Holly to get to work. Holly would just smile at him at watch his lips move, blah, blah, blah. Whatever was on her Walkman was ten times better than what was coming out of his mouth. There always seemed to be a flurry of activity in this building at night. Kale, the Trading Post guy would show up with bundles of money mumbling about "Jacking someone up." Then he would jump in his black car, drive all over camp and fire people over his radio. No one took him too seriously though, as someone would fire kale at least once a day. Evidently they were kidding, because he was still there every night, counting money over and over again.

Wilbur was happy checking out the camp and decided to relax on the water with his friends. He gracefully flew back to the lake and joined his friends in front of Nature Mary’s. Her songs wafted over the lake as Wilbur and the rest happily swayed back and forth in the distance.

KABOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The hum, the pith helmet. It was that crazy maniac Digger, the camp Ranger who would invoke chaos and mayhem upon Wilbur and his friends. Fearing for their lives ,Wilbur and his friends made a mad dash off the lake, dodging crashes and bullets as the madman stalked his prey. The golf cart made the hum, it went everywhere it seemed. No where were they safe from him. Wilbur scowled deeply. One day, Digger, I’m going to come after you and make you eat that gun. One day I will command the lake and you will never ever get rid of me or my friends, Wilbur thought to himself. However, until that day, Wilbur and the gang, beat a hasty exit away from camp, bidding a fond farewell to all those that stayed behind and were at the mercy of Digger and his golf cart. Yes, they would be back again the next day, as it was happy place that sat upon Crystal Lake.