Return To Sender
By: Courtney 
Shea29@aol.com


	Carol awakes the that morning when Doug leans down to
 kiss her goodbye. She opens her eyes and sees him standing over
 the bed, dressed for work. "Good morning," he says as she begins 
to wake up. 

	She looks at the clock on the night stand by her bed. It is
 5:30am. "You're leaving so early?" She has the day off and was
 hoping his shift would be later so they could spend some time 
together. 

	"Yeah, I'm on at six. You're off today, right?" She nods her
 head and yawns as she sits up in the bed. "Sorry, I didn't mean to
 wake you up. Why don't you go back to sleep? I have to leave
 anyway."

	He begins to walk towards the door. "Wait," she gets up
 and walks over to the doorway to put her arms around him.
 "When will you be off work?"

	"I work 12 hours so I should be home around 6:30pm. After
 I change clothes, I can come over, if you want me to." She wraps
 her arms tighter around his neck and pulls him towards her to kiss him.
 "I'll take that as a yes," he laughs.

	"Yes," she says, smiling and still in his arms. "I wish you
 could stay here." 

	He frowns, "I know, but we're both off next Saturday, right?" she shakes her head yes. "Well, why don't we plan something really nice? Anything you want to do."

	Her smile widens and she kisses him again. "You're so good to me. I love you."

	Becoming serious now, "I love you, too. I hope you never doubt that." He kisses her passionately. After a moment he pulls himself away. "If I don't leave now, I have a feeling I'll never make it in today!" They both grin and reluctantly part. "Hey, if you don't have any plans this afternoon, how about
meeting me for lunch?"

	"Sure, what time?"

	"Uh, I'm not sure. Let me see how things look down there
 and I'll call you around 9, okay?"

	"Great, I'll be here." They kiss one more time and he turns
 and descends the stairs. A moment later, she hears the front door
 open and close and hears Doug's car start up. He drives away. She
 turns back to the bed, but she is no longer sleepy. She decides to
 go ahead and start her day. She's been so busy working and
 spending all of her free time with Doug, that she has been neglecting
 her housework a lot lately. She decides she might as well get some
 of it out of the way today. With that, she heads towards the bathroom
 to take a shower. 

************************************************************************

	By 8am, Carol has already cleaned the kitchen and the
 bathrooms, vacuumed, dusted, and gotten a good start on the two
 weeks worth of dirty clothes piled in her laundry room floor. She looks
 around the apartment. She has to find something else to do, she'll go
 crazy if she has to sit here all day and wait for Doug. She decides to
 go up to the attic and see if she can get anything done up there. 

	She's been living in this house for about a year and a half
and she has yet to go through any of the boxes that she moved into
 her attic. Some of them are things from her old apartment which she
 no longer uses, some came out of storage since she finally has the
 space for them, but, mostly, they are boxes of her old things from her
 mother's house that she had brought over when her mom did her
 spring cleaning last year. She had told Carol to come over and get 
anything she wanted out of the attic before she threw anything away.
 Carol, who had no time to go through the boxes at that time, decided
 to just take them all and go through them later when she had more
 time. Well, days had turned to weeks, weeks to months, and now, 
almost a year later, she was finally ready to sit down and rummage
 through the old boxes. 

	 She mounts the stairs that lead to the attic. When she
 reaches the top, she pushes open the overhead panel and climbs
 through and into the dusky attic. Standing, she pulls the string that 
dangles just overhead and a single bulb provides limited light to the
 vast, dark room. Surveying the room, she sees boxes stacked high
 in every corner. She takes a deep breath and says, "Let the games
 begin!" 

	She opens up the first box and finds old clothes she hasn't
 seen since high school. Her mother never threw anything away, she
 just stored it in the attic. That is why Carol was so shocked when her
 mother had summoned her last year to pick these things up. Carol
 suspected her mother just wanted to rid herself of all of these old
 memories. She can  relate to that, some of them were pretty hard to
 relive . . . She is lost in her own thoughts for a moment as she thinks
 back to another time. Suddenly, the phone rings, pulling her from her
 recollection. "Hello?" she says as she picks up the cordless phone
she has brought with her upstairs. 

	"Hi, you up?" It's Doug. 

	"Yeah, I've been up since you left. I decided to get started
 on the housework."

	"Well, don't waste your whole day off doing that. I've been
 there a lot lately, I can clean up some when I'm off on Friday."

	"I didn't know you were off on Friday," Carol says. 

	"Yeah, Carter was supposed to work Sunday, but he has
 some kind of thing . . . anyway, I said I'd work a double that day and
 he said he'd take my shift Friday since he is scheduled to be off. Do
 you have to work Friday?"

	"Well, no, but I work 5pm to 5am on Thursday so I'll have
 to sleep part of the day. We'll still have the afternoon, though, so
 that should work out good."

	"Good. So, you still want to come meet me for lunch?"

	"Yeah. When's a good time?"

	"Uh, say around one? Is that okay?"

	"That's fine. I have some stuff to finish here anyway. I'll
 see you then."

	"Bye Carol, I love you."

	"I love you, too. Bye." She hangs up the phone and sets it
 down. Smiling, she goes back to the boxes before her. 

	After she has been in the attic for about three hours, she
 stands up and looks around. She has brought up some garbage
 bags to help her sort some of the stuff she is getting rid of. One is full
 of things she is throwing away. Two others sit by the door,
 overflowing with old clothes. She is going to take them by Goodwill
 on her way back from lunch today. She decides she's made enough
 of a mess for the day and she begins to fold up the boxes she has
 already emptied. As she does this, she bumps into a stack of boxes
 behind her and the top one comes crashing to the floor before she
 can steady it. 'Oh great!' she thinks as she looks down at the spilled
 contents which lay all over the floor. She bends down and begins
 picking up the jumbled items and placing them back into the box. 

	As she does this, she notices the envelope lying on the
 attic floor. It has fallen out of an old book that was in the toppled box.
 Immediately, she knows what it is. She stops cold and just stares at
 the envelope, rather fearfully. Her stance and her intense stare
 suggest that she feels the object might suddenly jump at her. 
Timidly, she reaches out and takes the envelope in her shaking hands.
 She looks down at it and lets out a strained breath. The envelope is
 yellowed from spending a decade in the old book in her mother's
 attic. She has tried for that entire decade to forget this scrape of
 paper, but to no avail. One look at it and the contents come rushing
 back to her. She slowly opens it up and removes the neatly folded
 paper that is hidden within. She unfolds it and stares down at the
 familiar words. Hot tears fill her eyes and blur her vision, but this
 doesn't matter. She committed those words to memory long ago and
 now they rush back in a wave of sorrow and remembrance. Unable
 to look at it any longer, she tucks the paper back into
its envelope, quickly. She drops the envelope on the floor and puts
 her head in her hands. All she can do now is cry, she doesn't know
 what else to do. 'Why now?' she thinks, 'Why, when I'm so happy,
 does this have to resurface again?' She doesn't have an answer.
 All she can do is cry.

************************************************************************

	Doug sits in the lounge and flips through an old magazine 
that is lying on the table by the couch. He puts the magazine down
 and looks at his watch. '1:15,' he thinks to himself, 'Where is 
Carol?' He is beginning to worry so he gets up and walks over to 
the phone. He dials Carol's number and listens
to it ring. Once, twice, three times, no answer. After the fourth
 ring, the machine picks up. "Hi, this is Carol. I'm not in right 
now to take your call but leave me a message and I'll get back to
 you as soon as possible. Thanks!" BEEP

	"Carol, it's Doug. Where are you? I thought we were meeting 
for lunch at one. Well, I'm going up to the cafeteria so if you get
 this message, just meet me up there. If you can't make it, that's 
okay. Just call me when you get a chance so I know everything is
 okay. I love you, bye." He cradles the receiver and looks around
 for a moment. Confused and still worried, he leaves the lounge and 
heads for the stairs towards the cafeteria.

************************************************************************

	Carol sits quietly on the couch and listens to Doug's voice
 as he talks to her answering machine. She knows he is worried 
because she can hear it in his voice. She also knows, however, that 
if she picks up the phone in her present state, he will be even more
 worried and this keeps her planted firmly on the couch. 

	Tears are still streaming down her face as she thinks about
 that letter. She had not even been able to get up off of the attic 
floor for almost half an hour after she found it. Finally, she was 
able to pull herself together and come back downstairs, but she was
 no longer up to her lunch date with Doug. She hates standing him 
up, but right now, it is for the best. She thinks about him as she
 sits there and it makes her feel a little bit better. At least now,
 she has him, she thinks. It wasn't too long ago that the secrets of
 her past had driven her to desperate lengths to escape them. 'But, 
not this time,' she thinks. 'I have Doug now and I can get through 
this.' She looks towards the living room window, 'But how will I ever
 tell him?' Her shoulders slump and she bites her lip to hold back the
 fresh tears that threaten her. She will find a way, somehow, she has 
to find a way.

************************************************************************

	At two o'clock that afternoon, Doug reenters the ER after a 
very unpleasant lunch hour. He spent his lunch alone in the cafeteria,
 staring at the sandwich he ordered, but never touched. Carol had never
 shown up and he hadn't received any pages so he assumes she has not 
called either. Still, he strides over to the administration desk where
 Jerry is busily typing on the computer. 

	"Hey, Jerry, have I gotten any calls in the last hour or so?" he inquires.

	"Naw, Dr. Ross, it's been pretty quite today. Is there someone
 in particular you were waiting to hear from?" Jerry looks up briefly 
from the computer terminal and glances at Doug. 

	Doug shakes his head, "No, I'm not really expecting a call. I
 just thought . . .," he trails off, not sure what to say. "Well, if 
anyone calls, page me immediately, okay?"

	Jerry looks curiously at Dr. Ross, but he simply nods and says,
 "Okay, no problem, doctor." Doug thanks him and walks into the lounge. 

	Mark is sitting on the sofa with his head back and his eyes 
closed. As Doug enters, Mark opens his eyes and greets Doug with a 
smile. "Hey, how's it going?" Mark can immediately tell the answer 
to his question before Doug responds. "What's the matter?" he asks 
with a slight frown.

	"Nothing," Doug tries to perk up, but it's hard to do,
 especially with Mark. He knows him too well. Doug sits down 
across from Mark and the look on his friend's face tells him 
that he is not hiding his worry very well. He looks away and 
says, "It's Carol."

	"Is everything okay between you? I mean, I thought, after the
 last couple of weeks and all . . .," he trails off, looking at Doug 
with a concerned expression. 

	"Yeah, everything is fine, I guess. I mean, it was great when 
I left this morning and I spoke to her around nine and she seemed fine.
 She was supposed to meet me hear for lunch and she never showed up, so
 I called her house. I got the machine, so I left a message telling her
 to call me. That was an hour ago and I am starting to get worried. It 
isn't like Carol to just disappear. I'm afraid something might have 
happened to her." Doug keeps his eyes on his hands the entire time he
 is talking. He is trying very hard not to get upset, but it is easy to 
see he is struggling.  

	Mark looks at his friend and he can see how worried Doug really 
is. "I'm sure there is a reasonable explanation," he assures Doug, but 
this doesn't do much to comfort him. "Listen, I'll see what I can do. 
Maybe I can cover part of you're shift so you can leave early to go and
 check on her."

	Doug looks up at this suggestion. His eyes meet Mark's and he 
says, "Thank you. I would really appreciate it." Mark tells Doug not to
 worry, that everything will be just fine. They talk for a few more 
minutes while Doug calms himself down. Then, the two get up and return
 to the ER. 

************************************************************************
 

By four o'clock, Carol has pulled herself together a 
bit. She has taken another shower and washed her face. She feels
better, but her mind is still reeling from the days events. She
is standing in the living room, folding laundry when Doug bursts
through the door. Carol looks up quickly, surprised to see him and
wondering what is going on.

	"Carol! Are you okay?" he asks her, rushing over to the couch 
where she is standing. 

	"Yes, I'm alright. Are you?" He is acting very strange and she 
wonders if something hasn't happened that she is unaware of.

	"I'm fine." He looks skeptically at her. "Where were you this 
afternoon? I was worried when you didn't show up. I called here and left
you a message but you never called back. I was so worried that Mark let
me come home early to check on you. What's going on?"

	She sets down the shirt she is folding and slumps down onto the 
couch. "I'm sorry," she says, sheepishly. "I had no idea you were that 
worried. I did get your message," she admits, "but, I thought we could 
just talk when you got here. I never expected that you'd get so upset. 
I really am sorry." She looks at him, waiting to see what his reaction will be. 

	"That's okay," he sits down beside her and takes her hand in his. 
"As long as you're okay. You are okay, aren't you?" He looks expectedly at
her. She looks down and Doug begins to worry again. "What is it? Did 
something happen?"

	"It's nothing, Doug, really. I've just been a little depressed today, 
that's all." She sees that he isn't going to accept this answer but she does 
not know how to proceed. The truth is too painful to conjure up at that moment.
She needs more time to figure everything out. 

	Doug turns her face towards him so that her eyes meet his. "I love you,
you know that. And, if there's anything, anything at all, that is bothering you,
you can always tell me. No matter what it is." His eyes are so full of love that
tears spring to her eyes. Seeing this, he pulls her closer and they embrace. She
cannot keep her emotions in check and she begins to cry softly,  her head resting
on his shoulder. He holds her for a long time, then, finally, she pulls away.

	"Do you want to talk about it?" he asks her. 

	"No, I can't. Not now. I just . . .," tears flood her eyes again and she 
squeezes her eyes shut. Doug nods, assures her that it is okay, that she has all
the time in the world and that he is not going anywhere. "I'll be here when you're
ready," he says and she smiles at him, even as fresh tears roll down her cheeks. 

	Doug walks with her up the stairs and leads her to the bed. "You should 
get some rest," he tells her and helps her into the bed. 

	"Will you stay with me?" she asks.

	"Of course." He crawls into bed beside her and she retreats back into his arms. 

	"Just hold me. Please." 

	He wraps her in his embrace and strokes her hair. "I'm never going 
anywhere, sweetie. I'll be right here, whenever you need me." Hearing his 
words, she feels safe. She knows what he says is the truth, he's always 
going to be there for her. And he would understand her secret if she told
him. He'd support her and she honestly believes it would make no difference
to him. But, she isn't ready. She is so confused and upset right now. She 
just needs to stay here in his arms and listen to his heart beat. Here, in 
his warm embrace, her head against his chest, listening to his gentle words
of comfort and feeling his soft, comforting caresses, she feels more safe 
and secure than she ever has before. She knows that this is where she belongs.
Nothing else has ever felt so right.

	Doug holds Carol in his arms for a long time. Finally, she drifts off 
to sleep. He looks down at her face. He sees her tear stained cheeks and a 
look of concern and worry crosses his face. He thinks about getting up and 
finishing the housework Carol was working on, but he decides he should stay
with her instead. He doesn't want her to wake up and him not be there. So,
he  closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep as well. They end up spending 
the rest of the night asleep in one another's arms.

************************************************************************

	At four o'clock the next morning, Carol opens her eyes. For a moment, 
she forgets where she is and all that has taken place. Then, Doug shifts 
slightly in his sleep and squeezes his arms around her. Now she remembers. 
All that has happened over the last 24 hours comes rushing back, right up 
until the moment she cried herself to sleep in Doug's embrace. 'He never
left me,' she thinks as she rests her head on his bare chest. 

	She is reluctant to leave his arms, but she has to use the restroom 
so she gently slips out of his grasp and makes her way across the room. When
she emerges from the bathroom, Doug is sitting up in bed, rubbing his eyes.
He looks her way and smiles as she enters the room. "Good morning," he yawns.

	"Good morning," she replies as she sits down beside him on the bed. 
"I'm sorry if I woke you. Go back to sleep." 

	He smiles, "Actually, I've been asleep since seven last night. I'm
surprised I slept this long." 

	"Sorry about that," she looks down with a melancholy grin. He moves 
closer to her and lifts her chin with his hand. He kisses her. 

	"Don't be sorry. Never be sorry for needing someone. I'll always be
there." She looks at him, surprised by his serious tone. His eyes are soft 
and his gaze is very loving. She smiles and leans her head onto his shoulder.
He strokes her hair and speaks softly, "I'm sorry for whatever it is that hurt
you. I would do anything to make this pain go away for you."

	"I know. I love you." She looks up at him and kisses him gently. "Are
 you hungry?" 

	"Yeah, actually. I'm famished." He grins. 

	"Me, too. Why don't we go makes some breakfast." They get up off of
 the bed and Doug takes Carol's hand. They walk downstairs together and enter
 the kitchen. The sun has not risen yet, so it is still very dark in the house. 
Carol flips the light switch as they enter. She walks over to the refrigerator 
and pulls out eggs, bacon, butter, and cheese as Doug goes to the counter and 
starts some coffee. 

	While Carol scrambles the eggs and cooks the bacon, Doug sets the table
 and makes some toast. When the food is ready, they sit down beside one another
 at the round table in one corner of the kitchen. They eat quietly, for a while.
 Finally, Doug sets down his cup of coffee and turns to Carol.

	"You know, if you want to talk, I'm here for you."

	"I know," she says. "I guess I'm just scared." She looks up at him and
 sees the love in his eyes. She also sees that he is still very worried about 
her. She decides it is time to tell him what's going on. "There is something 
you need to see," she says as she rises from the table. She takes Doug's hand 
and leads him back upstairs. Doug follows her. When they reach the attic stairway,
 she stops and turns towards it. She and Doug climb up the stairs and enter the
 attic. He looks around as they enter, noting the bags full of clothes by the door
 and the boxes stacked in every corner. Carol turns  towards the far corner of the 
room and Doug sees that she is headed for a box which is lying on the floor. It is
 half full and, around it, there are various things lying on the floor in disarray.
 Carol leans down and picks up an old hardback book that looks like it has seen 
better days. She opens the book and produces an envelope that is tucked between 
the pages. Doug looks questioningly at Carol as she hands him the envelope. "Read
 this," she instructs and relinquishes the object which has caused her so much pain. 

	Doug takes the envelope and removes the letter tucked inside. He unfolds the
 letter and begins to read it. Carol keeps her eyes on him for a reaction. As he
 reads, his expression turns from uncertainty to sadness. He finishes the letter
 and places it back in its envelope. He looks at Carol, takes a deep breath and looks
 down. She still keeps her eyes focused on him, holding her breath now. He walks 
closer and touches her face. A tear slips down her cheek and he takes her in his arms.

************************************************************************

	
	Doug and Carol hold their embrace for a long time. When they part, he takes
 her hand and leads her back downstairs. No words are exchanged between them until 
they are sitting together on Carol's bed. He looks at her. The sadness and utter 
despair he sees in her eyes sends a wave of sorrow through him. He
tales her in his arms and holds her very close to him. 

	"Why didn't you tell me before?" he asks.

	"I didn't know how. I always hoped this would just go away. I thought, if 
I never talked about it, then someday I would just forget about it."

	"It's not exactly something you forget. Do you want to talk about it?"

	She lifts her head from his chest and looks into his eyes. For a long 
moment, they are both uncertain as to whether or not she will speak. Finally,
 she takes a deep breath and begins the story she has kept hidden for so long:

	"I was seventeen. I was at a party with my friend, Jenny. It was at Jenny's
 boyfriend, Shane's house. I didn't really know too many people there, since Shane 
went to a different school than us. Anyway, about halfway through the party, Jenny 
and Shane disappeared upstairs. Since Jenny had driven me there and I was on the 
other side of town, I had no way to get home. I decided Jenny would be back soon, 
so I sat down to wait. There were a lot of people there and everyone was drinking 
and yelling and having a good time. I was
sitting outside on the patio to get away from the noise and the crowd. This guy, 
Todd, came out and sat with me. We talked a little and he seemed very nice. He said
 the party was a drag and asked me if I'd like to take a walk with him. I wasn't
 sure, but I'd heard Jenny mention him so I figured it would be okay.

	"Shane's house was kind of in the middle of no where and there were lots of 
woods so we walked down around, on the edge of the trees, and Todd talked to me about insignificant things. He said he'd just broken up with his girlfriend and that he
 was only at the party because Shane had said it would be good for him to meet some
 new people. I felt sorry for him. He seemed so nice and the way he described his
 girlfriend, it seemed like she had really done a number on him. 

	"After we'd walked for a while, I looked back and realized we'd gone pretty 
far. I could barely see the house and I suggested we start back. As I started 
walking back towards the house, Todd grabbed my arm. I was surprised, at first, 
then very scared. I tried to break free, but he was too strong. He threw me down on
 the ground and I think my head must have hit a rock or something. The next thing I
 remember, I woke up in the hospital with a splitting headache. At first, I had no 
idea what had happened. Then, as the
doctors examined me, I began to remember what had happen with Todd. The doctor came 
back into my room a little later and started asking me questions. She asked me what
 had happened and I told her what I remembered, up until I hit my head. She looked
 concerned when I stopped with this. She said, 'You
were brought in by your friend. She found you behind her boyfriend's house, unconscious.
 Your head was bleeding and . . .,' the look on her face when she stopped talking was
 the worst thing I had ever seen. I was terrified. She seemed to be in pain for me. 
'What is it?' I said, 'What exactly happened?' She stared at me for a moment, then 
she shook her head. 'I don't know. All we know is that, when your friends found you, 
your clothes were torn.' I froze. I didn't know what to do. 'It seems you've been 
attacked Miss Hathaway.'
Those words wouldn't go away." Carol stops talking. She is crying and has to catch 
her breath before she can continue. Doug puts his arm around her and she slowly continues.

	"Todd raped me. I didn't believe it at first, but then . . .," again, 
she stops. Doug knows about the rape from the letter. The letter was sent to Carol
 from Todd's mother. She wanted Carol to know that, after she'd had him convicted 
for raping her, Todd lost his scholarship to Stanford. He was to spend four years 
in prison for what he had done and his mother believed that Carol had ruined his 
life. 

	"It's okay, I know the rest," Doug says. 

	Carol looks at him. "No, you don't. The worst part wasn't the rape, or the 
letter. After Todd went to jail, two months after the rape, I found out I was 
pregnant." Doug looks at Carol, unsure he has heard her. Tears roll down her cheeks 
as she watches his reaction. "I didn't know what to do," she says through her tears. 
She is sobbing now and can barely get her words out. "I  didn't want to . . .," she
can't continue. Doug wraps his arms around her and tries to calm her down.

	"It's okay, I'm here," he says in a soothing voice. "It is going to be
 alright."

	"I had an abortion." She says it and then hangs her head in despair. "I killed 
my baby. I know it was Todd's fault, but I still had the abortion." 

	"Carol," Doug takes both of her hands into his, "none of that is your fault.
 You were just a kid. You didn't do anything wrong. That man raped you! You shouldn't
 have to pay for his mistake."

	"But, I have. For the last 10 years. Every time I see a baby or a mother, I 
think, I could be that woman, that could be my child. I don't think I will ever get
 over what I've done."

	"Why'd you do it, then?" Doug asks the question as gently as possible. "If you
 felt that way, why didn't you give the baby up for adoption?"

	"I don't know. My mother thought I should just 'get it taken care of'.
 I was scared and confused and still pretty upset about the trial and all. And
 then that letter came . . . I just thought it was for the best. I thought I'd
 be able to handle it. I didn't know what it would be like."

	Doug looks at her. "You have kept all of this inside for so long. Why
 didn't you tell me before?  Did you think this would change the way I feel 
about you?"

	"I just, I didn't know what to do. I really tried to put it behind me.
 I didn't tell anyone about the rape or the abortion. Our family moved from that
 town shortly after that so no one knew about it. And, I was doing okay. Then, 
two years ago, right after you and I broke up, Todd called me." Doug looks
up, stunned. "He said he was getting married and he wanted to make amends 
for all of the mistakes he'd made in the past. He want to apologize! How 
could he ever. . . ," she succumbs once again to her sobbing. Doug holds 
her, not sure what else to do. 

	"I'm so, so sorry." That's all he can think to say. "I am so sorry 
that this happened to you." Carol shakes with sobs and Doug holds her tighter.
 Tears fill his eyes as she continues to cry. 

************************************************************************

	At three o'clock, Carol is just emerging from the shower. Her hair is 
wet and she has a towel wrapped around her. Doug is lying on the bed, taking 
an afternoon nap. He opens his eyes as Carol rummages through the closet, finding
 something to wear to work. 

	"You're not leaving yet are you?" he asks as she begins to get dressed. 

	"No, but I only have a few hours. I thought I'd go ahead and get ready. 
I'll probably leave around four-thirty."

	"Are you sure you'll be okay?" He is concerned about her, still. She had 
calmed down considerably after this morning and they had talked a lot that afternoon,
 but Doug is still worried. 

	"I'll be fine. Don't worry." She turns towards him, a serious expression 
on her face, "Thank you, Doug, for everything." She walks over to the bed and hugs
 him. "I've never felt like anyone cared about me this much before." She wraps her
 arms tightly around his neck.

	Doug puts his arms around her waist and they embrace for a moment. When she 
lets go, she steps back and looks at Doug. He is crying. "What?" she asks, concerned.

	"I just love you. I . . . I never knew what love felt like until now," he 
tries to swallow back his tears as they fill his eyes.  "I guess I am just finally
 seeing what I've been missing all this time." She smiles at him and kisses him 
tenderly. "I'm never letting you go, Carol. I can't believe I was that stupid once,
 and I will never be that stupid again." He takes her in his  arms and covers her 
with warm kisses. She crawls into bed beside him and they make love with a new kind
 of affection. They have both learned a great deal
about each other today and it has strengthened their feelings immensely. They take
 comfort in each other and love without exception. 

************************************************************************

	Carol is five minutes late when she walks into the ER to start her 
shift. "I'm sorry, Haleh," she yells towards the nurses' station as she runs
 into the locker room and quickly gets on her scrubs. She comes rushing out 
and walks quickly to her post. "Sorry," she says again, looking towards Haleh,
 who was supposed to be off at five but had to wait for Carol to arrive.  

	"Oh, that's okay. Just don't make a habit of it!" Haleh smiles at Carol 
and grabs her coat. Carol returns the grin and goes about her work. 

	"So, how have you been lately, Carol?" she looks up to see John Carter 
leaning on the counter, skimming some charts. 

	She smiles, "Good, John. How about you?"

	"I'm alright. No excitement lately though." He grins and looks back at the charts.

	"Excitement? You don't get enough of that around here?"

	"Yeah," he laughs, "I guess I do." Just then, an EMT busts through the 
door with a car accident victim and says there are three more on the way, all 
critically injured. "Here we go!" Carter says and leaves his charts to attend 
to the incoming patient. Carol smiles to herself, rolling her eyes, and follows
 him to assist.

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