Conologues

For the first time ever Macy's has hired a woman to be their Santa Claus. Parents are warning their kids - "You better watch out, you better not cry, 'cause Santa's got PMS."

Here's a strange story. In Denmark a kitten has been born with fluorescent hair. Apparently, Dennis Rodman really does get around.

They're coming out with a new version of Hollywood Squares and Roseanne has agreed to sit in the center square. They're calling the show The New Improved Structurally Fortified Hollywood Squares.

John Wayne Bobbitt has a new movie coming out. It's the typical Hollywood story: boy gets penis, boy loses penis, boy gets penis back.

A recent marketing poll shows that 32 percent of all diamonds are purchased right before Christmas. And 50 percent are purchased right after the test strip turns pink.


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HAPPY FORTH OF JULY!