D'oh! Gas, I mean.
fw!!
* * *
Hey, Skippey?
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Skipper_and_Petey
Skipper- What is is it Petey? And I thought I told you not to call me that!
Petey- He-yuk! Sorry Skippey! But I think there's something with my propelar! We're going down!
Skipper- Oh, great! And look, there goes Cavewoman and Puma Man.
Petey- Hey Skippey! Look! That big blue car is rushing up to meet us!
Skipper- Oh no! We're gonna land on Mitchell's giant Ford!
CRASH!!
Skipper- AHHHHHHH! We're stuck!
* * *
Careful, Skipper...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Dumbschmoe
Mitchell might mistake you for a barbecue on his grill.
fw!!
* * *
Go, Smelly Pigs, go!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
Hahahahaha!!!
(runs Skipper off the road.)
Eat Hog manure, Mr. Man!!!!! Hahahahaha!!!
(Mel raises her mighty septor and turns a helpless tree into ice.
Whooo hooo!!!!!
(^_^)
* * *
Puma Man is dead
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Cavewoman
and gets Rimmer to turn around and come back,concerned for his safety. She gets out of her blue Ford and offers Cavewoman a beer.
Suddenly Puma Man jumps up..not dead at all!! HA!! Cavewoman jumps on his back and they are off again!
Cavewoman and Puma Man
* * *
Date: 3/23/2000
From: RedFraggle
Little Red Fraggle starts peddling her kids three wheeler and gets caught in a cloud of dust.
Where did she go?
An on clashing of cymbals can ber heard in her general direction!!!! She has a evil monkey toy with her!!!
* * *
(throws empty beer can at skipper)
Date: 3/23/2000
From: cowbear
Haha...its gonna take more than that to impair my big blue ford!
although it's not gonna take much more Pabst to make me impaired, I have reserves in the trunk!
:) - cowbear
* * *
*chucks a moonrock at Rimseys winsheild*
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
The deadly Bees car swearves off the road.
* * *
Oh, yeah, this is the life...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
crusin' over pavement... Oh, sh*t!!!!!
Noooooo!!!
(Mel's sceptor touches the ground turning it to ice. She, and all the hapless morons behind her slide around and crash on the side.)
Oh, poopie!!
(~_~)
* * *
Agggh! Schmoe's right!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Skipper_and_Petey
Skipper- Cowbear! Get Mitchell outta here! He think Petey's a giant sausage!
Mitchell- Mmmmm...thick juicy cholestral filled goodness!
Petey- Hi ya Mitchell! Ha-yuck! Will you be my friend?!
Mitchell- Whoa. A talkin sausage. I've only seen one of those before. It was pretty tasty is I remember right.
Skipper- Aghhhhh! He's chewing on petey's propelar! Someone get him of of there!
* * *
Look out below AnglesVanof Death!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Cavewoman
Puma Man's gotta take a dump!
Cavewoman
* * *
I'd help you, but...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
I'm kinda stuck here myself, coz this sceptor thing is a disaster.
owww...
* * *
... Rimseys bra is in stable condition..
Date: 3/23/2000
From: RimseysDeadlyBeeCar
No moonrock will harm me!!!
(Rimmer sends out her special pie chucking clowns!!! They attack Cavewoman and Mic first!!!!)
* * *
(careens all over the road)
Date: 3/23/2000
From: AngelsVanODeath
I am a woman driver after all! (pops the clutch and stalls out, after much cursing and banging on the steering wheel the van finally starts again)
Damn! Now I gotta catch up!
* * *
Heelp meeeee!!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
(All, of a sudden, Michell decides to lay off on the "talking sausage." He goes to eat Mel when...)
She raises her mighty sceptor and Michells dust. her pigs get running and she's off again. Only Skipper is behind her.
Oh, wait, she's catching up to Rimmer!!!!
No. But close though!!
* * *
NO pie-chucking clown can get me...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
I've got Paul the lizard in the seat next to me.
HAHAHA
No clown could get close enough!
* * *
Hahahaha!!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
I've passed AngelsVanOfDeath!!!!!! Whooooo hooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Mel moves closer and closer to the front....)
* * *
Hya!!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Glaistig
Glaistig yells to the horses leading her Smolken Hearse.
Twinkle twinkle little rats
I will toy with you all like a cat!
I will pick up the dead
and make them mine.
Before this race is over
I'll make your coffins of pine.
* * *
**dumps her garbage on the road**
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
the pigmobile stops for lunch and MIC zooms into the lead.
* * *
(fires cannons at Cavewoman and Skipper)
Date: 3/23/2000
From: AngelsVanODeath
I'm gonna blast you jerks outta the sky! Take that! And that!
(accidentally shoots a cannonball through the announcer's booth!)
Whoops! Sorry! (beep, beep!)
* * *
Hey my propelars working again Skippey!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Skipper_and_Petey
Skipper- Great! Get going!
ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
(Skipper throws hard candy down at the other racers.)
Skipper- Ha! Take that! (ping! ping! bing!)
* * *
Nooooo! Mic, how could you???
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
No! This is no time for snacking!! I'll make you all into frozen bacon if you don't keep running...
There we go. I knew that'd get them going.
Now, she's closing in on... noone. But wait!! If she could just get a few inches closer to Rimmer...
Look out, it's gonna be really really cold!!!!
* * *
(pulls up nest to Angels Van)
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MalcolmFrink
I'm in my ELECTRICIAN VAN because I'm an ELECTRICIAN. You know what they say about us baby. It's all true. Come ride with me!
* * *
Puma Man no!! Not at a Stuckey's!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Cavewoman
Dang! He never could resist those pecan rolls.
Well, atleast by ducking in here we can avoid those clowns with pies!
Cavewoman and Puma Man
* * *
(Rimsey has secretly substituted
Date: 3/23/2000
From: RimseysDeadlyBeeCar
everyones windsheild wiper fluid with fear scented bee formula. As each person cleans the mud from there car she deploys the first army of deadly bees!!!!)
* * *
**risks losing her lead to...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
pull into an airport to hire a charter plane**
I've just sent Johnny Longbow into the air to bore Puma Man into a long nap. Cavey and Puma Man come crashing to Earth.
* * *
Hhahaha!! (She passes Stuckey's)
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
And Cavewoman with it!!!
(All of a sudden, the mushroom headed elf dude pops up next to Mel.)
Mel: What? What are you doing here?
Mushroom Elf: I'm helping you of course!!
Mel: Wait! You don't want to be found! Now you probably want to play hide and seek or something.
Mushroom Elf: No, we've got a race to win. Pedal to the metal, piggies!!! Mel, close in on Mic... there ya go...
(Melly raises her sceptor and Mic's craft turns to ice.)
Thaw that one!!
* * *
Releases the caustic vapors...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Dumbschmoe
Now none of you can see the road!
fw!!
* * *
Ow! Skippey! The bees are stinging me!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Skipper_and_Petey
Skipper- Oh shut up Petey. You're made of Metal.
Petey- He-yuk! Oh yeah! You sure are smart Skippey!
Skipper- Shut up you big flying toaster. Here be useful and spit some hard candy down at those cars.
Petey- Won't that hurt them Skippey? I don't wanna hurt anyone.
Skipper- Uh, no Petey, um, it's a parade, you're supposed to throw candy.
Petey- Oh! Okeydokey then Skippey! (ping, ping, ping)
* * *
Gang way for Mr. Peeper's Pretzel Cart!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Mister_Peepers
Get your Hard and Soft Pretzels right here!! Served with ice cold lemonade and many flavored dippings!
Mr. Peepers
* * *
Smelly must have me mistaken...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
I was at the airport. How could you have frozen me?
* * *
Oh great THANKS Skipper.
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
Now the dumb pigs are EATING again!!!
Mushroom Elf: Let me try somehting. (He pops up in front of the pigs and scares the little hams out of thier wits. Finally, they take off at top speed...)
Hehehehe...
* * *
Starts at a slow trot...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: ManMan
Yup, just taking it easy on my horse. Yup, ol Steve The Horse is doing just fine at an easy pace. Yup. No worries.
ManMan
* * *
Look out!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Cavewoman
Puma Man is flying like a moron!!
(Puma Man flies into the Angels's Van)
How ya doing wulfie? Need any help with those guns?
* * *
Sorry, Mic. I guess that must have been
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
Rimmsey's car! But wait, Rimmer releases her bees and they chase my pigs the other way!
no piggies, no!!
* * *
A huge spider looms over ManMan & Horse
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Lita_n_Spidey
Hee hee... Guess who else got a slow start!
You better pick up the pace there Manny ManMan, or you're going straight up my spider's behind!
Lita
* * *
Never thought I'd be grateful for bees..
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
Mic zooms into the lead once again as the Pigmobile rushes past, going the wrong way.
* * *
Uses Time Transport COMPUTER...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: ManMan
And ends up several miles ahead of the Giant SPider. Nyah!!!
ManMan
* * *
Mushroom Man pops in frot again...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
and scares the pigs the right way. But poor mushroom man runs off, being stung by those pests in various places.
Farewell, sweet mushroom man. You will not have left in vain.
Hya!!!
She catches up to Mic, and the two are side by side in racing...
* * *
Oh shoot! Go Spidey! Go!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Lita_n_Spidey
(The giant spider starts running at an enormous speed. Lita catches up with the rest of the action in no time)
It's amazing how fast you can go when you have eight legs!
Lita
* * *
Hey hey, it's Puma and Cavey! Alright!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: AngelsVanODeath
Party with me, I've got some coke that I swiped from Jack Palance. He was trying to sell it to little kids, but I kicked his elderly ass and now the coke is mine. Sadly, I have no idea how to use coke. Oh well, just stir some in your coffee, I guess.
And hey, you can keep that creepy electrician off my ass! He's on my tail and won't get off!
* * *
whoops! Now I know where you get the
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Cavewoman
name Revenge! It must be from those burritos you had for lunch!
Puma Man and I are outta here!
Up up and away...(Puma Man lands on top of the Deadly Bee Mobile)
* * *
**tosses some pork chops in front...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
of the pig mobile**
The pigs screech to a halt in horror and Mic leaves Smelly_Mel in the dust.....
....for awhile.
* * *
Hey, who left the midget in the road?
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Carmelita9000
Oh well.
(The Giant Spider stuffs Mushroom Man up it's butt)
Onward! I think I see a pig up ahead!
Lita
* * *
You should know you cant shake
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
an Ice queen!!! Now, see piggies, that's what YOU'RE gonna be if you don't get moving...
(Pigs start running faster than ever.)
Hahaha! eat ice!!!
She raises her sceptor once more...
and freezes Mic's car. Not Mic, but her car.
That'll teach you to mess with me, little miss person!!!
(At that moment Mushroom man pops in the cart with a cage full of bees.)
In the lead again...
* * *
**gets off her bike, and shoots a...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
moonrock arrow into Paul the lizard, riding on the back. The fire causes the motorcycle to thaw. Mic jumps back on her bike and cacthes up to the Pig_mobile. Mic Fires another, spare arrow, into the Pig. He's down for the count**
* * *
Oh no my little baby sunhat!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Schmoe_n_wurwolf
I'll have to turn around and get it!
fw!!
* * *
Bossie!!!! NOOOOOOO!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
(Mel jumps off her carriage and Mic and Mel are locked in hand to hand combat)
This'll teach you to shoot BOSSIE!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHH!!!
(She nears her sceptor to Mic's head, when a shadow passes over the two. It's Lita and Spidey, and she's in the lead...)
* * *
**doesn't understand how she can be...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
in hand to hand combat with Smelly, but decides to roll with it.
As Smelly hesitates, Mic grabs the septor, jumps back on her bike and, revving the engine, takes off once again, plotting how to take down the Giant Spider.**
* * *
Oh, yeah, I knocked you off your bike...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
earlier, but anyway,
(Mel bends down to grieve for Bossie, and she notices Mushroom Man.)
Eww, you stink. Bad. Where've you been.
MM: DOn't ask. We've got to catch that spider!!!
But how? Bossie's dead!!
MM: But I have healing powers!!!
No you don't.
MM: This is our race, so I can if I want to.
all you can doo is hop around... Bossie!!
(This time, Bossie's collar has protected her from certain death. Mel hiches her up to the carriage, and)
They're offf!!!!!
* * *
**quickly lays down some highway...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
carpet. Get over that, Pig-mobile!**
Mic glances over her sholder as she zooms away, and sees the Pigmobile stopped.
MUHAHAHAHA!!!!
* * *
Damn!! Sleds don't go over that!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
Noooooo!!!! I could use a little help here!!!
Hey, Pumaman... you're strong, right? can you get this sled over carpet??
(Bumms a ride from... well, anyone who will help her.)
* * *
**Mic can't quite figure out how to...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
bring down the Giant Spider, so she stays a safe distance behind for now, being careful to watch out for the pig-mobile, in case it made it's way over the highway carpet.
* * *
Vroooom! Vroooooom!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: SatansMaverick
I'm finally here! You should have seen the line at the gas station. I knew I should have gone to the Unocal instead of the Arco, but the gas was 2 bucks a gallon down there! Saving five cents and getting a Big Gulp at the AM/PM was well worth the wait!
Vrroooooom!! Emby whizzes past the stragglers in back and puts the pedal to the metal! I'm gonna win, dammit!
Embs sch-hst BIP
At little irratable
* * *
Push, Mushroom Elf, push!!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
MM: Don't you think it yould be easier get some help?
well, noone seems to want to help us, but we're almost there!! Bossie, a little help here? Bossie?
(Bossie, while still hitched up, is staring at the caged bees. With one swift move of her hoof, she releases them. Scared out of her little wits, she runs, terrified, over the carpeting. She is pulling the sled with her.)
Hold on Bossie!!! whoa!!!
(Mel and MM jump into the moving sled, and slide across the carpeting...)
Hey, Mic! Missed us?
* * *
**Mic thinks quick and...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
before Mel or the mushroom guy can figure it out, Mic slows her bike and swings the stolen septor hitting the pig in the first swing, and the Mushroom guy with the second.**
* * *
::Emby can see lights ahead::
Date: 3/23/2000
From: SatansMaverick
What is that? It looks like....blue ice light! From the magic sceptor thingie! That must mean Mel's way up there!
::shifts the Maverick into 5th gear:: I should have gotten an automatic!
* * *
(But Mel grabs her sceptor back and...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Smelly_PigMobile
hits Mic's bike again. She then picks up bossie and pushes the sled away...
* * *
**before Mel can knock Mic off her bike
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
Mic revs the engine and pushes her speed back up to 75 MPH, closing in on the Giant Spider.
* * *
::Closing in on Mel::
Date: 3/23/2000
From: SatansMaverick
::pulls up next to the sled:: Having some problems with your pig sled there? Frozen pigs don't work too good. Here, let me help...
::melts the ice sceptor with Satan's pitchfork::
That should fix that. And...
::lights all the piggies's tails on fire, making them go berzerk!::
Hee hee!
::steps harder on the gas and shoots out in front of Mel::
Ha ha! THIS is where the fish lives, baby!
Now to take down Mic! :o)
* * *
**Mic pulls behind a billboard...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
and as soon as Embs' Maverick is in sight, begins chucking Moonrocks at the windshield. When that doesn't work, Mic fires two moonrock arrows at Emb's back tires, causing her to swerve off the road. Mic takes off again and quickly catches up to the Giant Spider yet again.
* * *
Ahhhhhhhh!!!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: SatansMaverick
::CRASH!::
Gaaah! What'm I gonna do? Oh, I know! I'll summon Pitch!
::Emby snaps her fingers and Pitch appears::
Pitch: Um, what am I doing here? Shouldn't I be torturing Santa?
Emby: Dammit, Pitch! You're one of Satan's minions, aren't you? Fix up the tires on this Maverick, or I'll get the Morningstar on your ass!
Pitch: Yes, ma'am!!
::Emby sips her Big Gulp while Pitch changes her tires::
Emby: Hurry it up! Mic and Lita are getting farther ahead!!
* * *
**Mic looks over her shoulder....
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MiSTie_93874
in time to notice Picth changing Embs tire. Mic swings up to a pay phone and puts a call through to Santa himself.**
MIC: Hey, Santa, I got some info you might like to hear.
SANTA: Ho, ho, ho. And what might that be, little girl.
MIC: Uh, that's "woman" to you. Anyway, Picth is changing tires out here. Can you see him with that big assed eye of your's?
SANTA: Ho, ho, ho. Now's my chance to get the bastard! Thanks, there'll be a little something extra for you in your stocking this year.
MIC: Thanks.
**Santa hightails it over to Embs maverick and begins pummeling Picth. Mic rides safely on...
...for now.**
* * *
Hey!! Break it up!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: SatansMaverick
Emby: Santa!! I think Mel back there has some milk and cookies!
Santa: Cookies!! Er, has she been a good little girl this year?
Emby: Yes indeed, old boy.
Santa: Whoo-hoo! Cookies for Santa! ::jiggles away::
::Emby looks over the bloody mess that is Pitch::
Emby: Wow, you look pretty beat up, huh buddy? That Santa sure can pack a punch! Why don't you head back to the Netherworld, and I'll fix this up.
::Pitch groans and disappears::
Emby: Hmmmm...now what do I do? ::pulls out a road map:: Hey, there's a Jiffy Lube right up the road! ::starts pushing the car, slowly, slowly...::
* * *
KingBoodozer enters the race late...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: KingBoodozer
...but that's okay, I have a speed demon super cool charged up Jaguar and all I see is a big old spider...(keep it away from me please, it's scarey), SmellyMelley with an old pig sled, a person talking to Pitch, someone else is talking to Santa and what the hell? There's a woman riding a guy that looks like Pumaman in the sky! No! That *IS* Pumaman and Cavewoman is riding him! There's a whole bunch of other stuff going on too, but who cares! I'm gonna win this race, because I'm the Ace and look fine in this cat suit of mine yeah, baby!
Oh look at how shiney and clean all these people are, well take *THIS*!!!!!!!
(KingBd feeds pudding into a wind machine that is attached to her Jag and spews pudding all over everything and hopefully everyone)!!
(KingBd also carefully avoids the big old mean looking spider.)
Yuck. Shiver. Squirm. How can Carmelita get near that awful thing? Eeeeek.
Must rock, must roll VROOM!
~ tootles darlings~
See you on the dark side of Keith Moon.
* * *
Line at QuickyMart was long!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: BloodFairy
After gasing up my jetpack, grabing a Lingenberry Squishy & a couple SlimJims ("Thank you.Come Again!") I'm off!Yikkes how does the steering work on this thing?!!!!(flies up, through QuickyMart, into cooler, through magazine rack, out of store & up the road)Ayyyyiiiii!!!!
* * *
Stops arguing with Tina the boozer bimbo
Date: 3/23/2000
From: manosgirl
looks around... Hey, where did everybody go?? Shut up Tina, we've got to make tracks! (Revving up the two seater) Vrooom! Vrooom, vrooom! We can catch up! we Can do this!
--Just then, a police car pulls them over. "Follow Me!"
--manos girl and Tina fall in behind the police squad car, passing so many of the other racers. "Eat Sodium, you losers!" manos girl screams as she tosses sodium out the side of the convertible.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
* * *
WHOOPS!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Clayton_Forrester
Oopsie, replied to the wrong thread. Didn't even SEE this one until now. Well, at least this time I won't embarrass myself by playing my stupid little Racing Theme Song...
Okay. Hey, it took me a while to get here because I was busy avenging the deaths of all my biker buddies who died in a horrible bloody depressing shoot-out with a rival Sidehacking gang, but I'm here now and ready to get GROOVY, baby! Yeah! ;)
Clayton Forrester hops aside her bike, her assistant T.V.'s Frank hanging on the running board, and looks around at the competition on the road. Man, is it ever a MESS! So she avoids the road entirely, and goes off to the side among the rocks and dirt and junk, taking a mountain trail shortcut instead. Having a small, agile vehicle with good treads on the tires (she put them on specially this morning) she can do that.
She looks at Carmelita's vehicle and shudders. "Wow, good thing I have you here instead of my FIRST assistant, Frank." she says. "He never did like big SPIDERS..." ;)
Oh, side-note--I noticed on the other thread, the sign-up one, somebody asked to use Pearl's van, the Widowmaker. Well, if they can do THAT, then that means that vehicles from MST3K itself are allowed.
SO...since it was my idea, and since no-one else wanted it, I've got the original KTMA Satellite of Love (yes, I am sticking by my conviction that it's a totally seperate ship from the dogbone one) flying overhead where you can't see it, following the race. It's been souped up with extra-nasty precision laser guns (Joel did that for me) so don't any of you go gettin' any IDEAS, eh? HA HA HA HA HA! ;)
Clayton Forrester pops the clutch and tells the world to EAT HER DUST!!
Well, part of the world, anyway.
File this one, Larry.
--Clay--
P.S. I might be making my other posts in this thread under a name that reflects my vehicle. We'll see if I can manage to set up a name like that or not.
"GOOD one, Cambot!"
* * *
Kidnapping Clayton with the blurring ray
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Samurai88
And transporting her aboard the Zigra ship/monster.
MUAHAHAHAHAHA Now, I return her to the race with a silver and green jumpsuit and eyes with retsin or "sex appeal". Take your choice but watch out for her snapping fingers at you.
MUAHAHAHAHAHA........ What are the chances anyone will figure out how to free you from my spell, Clayton?
"KCTT" Samurai88
* * *
Guess Who THIS Is?! ;)
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Sidehacker
YAY, now I have FOUR names at this site! That's three too freakin' many! ;) (For those of you keeping score at home, that's Captain Chaotica, who is my own original character, Clayton Forrester, the name I use most often, Queen Cleolanta, the main villian from "Crash of the Moons", and now Sidehacker.) I won't be using this name very much except for in this race, however. Well, maybe I'll use it some. After all, it's kinda cool that I got a name after one of my favourite old-school Joel-era episodes... :)
Anyway. Back to the races, Samurai, who says I WANT to be freed from your spell? For one thing, I was ALREADY evil, so that doesn't bother me none. Secondly, anything that makes me able to contol people better will help me out with my insane diabolical schemes to RULE THE WORLD, so I would LIKE the ability to knock people out with my eyes and make them do my bidding. And third, I don't think I'd mind being "the hot chick" for a while. ;)
Oh, and by the way, Samurai, my metallic ring Satellite is shootin' at Zigra with its lasers! ;) BWAHAHAHA!! (Don't totally DESTROY it in your retaliation post, please. I LIKE that funky old ship, dagnabit, and I want to continue using it for a while. Just beat it up some without blowing it out of the sky.)
Um, should either of us be frightened that it's like, say, 3:00 in the morning (or 5 on the East Coast) and we're both STILL AWAKE, totally hyper, and ready to joke and roleplay and be wacky on a moment's notice?
Nah. Not scary. Just shows that we're FUN, whoo!! ;)
Push the button, Fra--oh, wait, you can't, you're on the motorcycle with me. Oh, well, then, File this one, Larry. And STOP whimpering, ya big coward, I keep TELLING you, the Giant Spider can't hurt you if you're only watching it on T.V.! Sheesh...
--Clay--
"Hey, guys, it's okay to like the hot chick again, she's on our side now!"
* * *
Wind in my hair & Bugs in my teeth
Date: 3/23/2000
From: BloodFairy
This jetpack is hard to steer & the controls are all sticky.What was CommanderCody doing with this thing?(Shudder)Ewwww,don't think about it! I think I'm getting the hang of this!(sudden wind gust sends jetpacked BloodFairy crashing through tree-tops & shrubbery)OW!Ai!
Crap!pokey!Birds!Aiyyyy!
* * *
Chugging steadily along behind...
Date: 3/23/2000
From: _VeGeTa_vampire
way behind.
* * *
Oh no! You did not shoot that green s**t
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Samurai88
at me! --ID4
First, I'll use my razor sharp fins to slice off the old SOL's lasers. Next, I'll pelt all the racers with jelly beans from the top of the ship!
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA eat sugary-fruity-death!
Finally, I'm going to clean out some of these cobwebs. Sheesh, when was the last time someone dusted in here?
And I haven't even transformed the ship yet!
"KCTT"
Samurai88
I'm not worried about being up this late. I almost always am up this late, especially Wed night Thurs morning, Clayton. I don't have IM or mIRC, but you can emial me or send me the address of a chat to meet you in if you want. My email will alert me to new messages.
* * *
just a milling fan watching the race.
Date: 3/23/2000
From: dingleberrysncreme
COME ON!!! Someone throw a burnin' tire at me!
* * *
*zaps dingle with the blurring ray
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Samurai88
and transports him to the red-hot, solid iron moose-boat from "The Day the Earth Froze"* THAT'S a dingle vehicle if I ever thought of one.
Now you're in the race. If you're gonna reform you might as well get in the game. So many flamers reform and then stop replying. Get in the game. We don't hold grudges too long arond here. Hell, man, if I can accept your reformation, anyone can.
:o)
"KCTT"
Samurai88
* * *
Cavey is on *my* car? What the....?
Date: 3/23/2000
From: RimseysDeadlyBeeCar
Rimsey had fallen asleep at the wheel (which is how she normally drives anyway) and finds Cavey and Pumaman TRYING TO JOIN HER CAR POOL!!!!
NOOOOOOO!!!!!
Rimsey's first army of deadly bees had no affect on them!!!
"Take the wheel Shirley, I'll handle this!" Rimsey opened the sun roof to find Cavey and Puma had taken advantage of Rimsey's absence and had set up lawn chairs on the roof of her car AND they had broken into her supply of martini's and frappuccinnos!
Rimsey knew how to handle Pumamen. You just push them the Hell over! Pumaman fell off the roof and rolled away. Maybe he was playing dead but now but that left only Cavey and Rimsey- prepared to fight in hand to hand mortal combat!!!
No. Rimsey realized that Cavey, like Vadinho, could probably beat the crap out of her, so she ducked back into her car and sent out another clown. This one was armed with a special seltzer bottle full of fear scented bee juice.
DRINK UP CAVEY!!!!!
* * *
BRRRAAAAAPPAAPAP!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: BloodFairy
(crashing out of trees flailing wildly before regaining control)This thing sounds like a leaf blower with flatulance!(pulls tree branches & nesting matter from the 'do) Hey, what's that down there?(spies pigcart below)It's Mel!(Waving wildly)"HI MEL!"(nearly crashes into pigcart)"Whoops, Sorry!"(throws down apples from "tree conflict" for piggys)CutePiggys! (& SlimJims for Mel & MushroomGuy)Don't know what MushroomGuys like, but anyhow.
(Throws down special treat I brought for everyone-WAFFLES!)Ask me for your waffles when you see me! (waves at Mel & piggys and heads erratically, up the road)BRRAAAPPAPPP!Excuse me!
* * *
Glaistig finds Pumaman playing dead.
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Glaistig
She pulls up her hearse along side him and pulls his body out of the ditch.
"Cavey and Puma went up a hill
to fetch a pail of blood.
Puma fell down and Cavey bit a clown
leaving Puma behind in the mud!" (Damn!!! That's a pretty good poem!!!)
She starts to dig a whole to bury him when all of a sudden he gets up and flies away to save Cavey.
* * *
peddle..... peddle..... peddle.......
Date: 3/23/2000
From: RedFraggle
Little RedFraggle peddles her stupid three wheeler as the others are already miles ahead of her.
Suddenly the monkey toy clashes his symbols and who should appear but Miffy the cat!!! She'd been brought back from the dead (as she was now a minion of Satan) and now she too could breathe fire.
RedFraggle puts away the three wheeler and gets on Miffy instead. The devil cat speeds away and catches up with SatanMaverick. It jumps on the roof and tries to scare Emby out.
* * *
**Nydia pulls into the race!!!**
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Nydia
She rides in Gumbos Firetruck. Along with her are some of the robots from that ep that are set to malfunction and tear apart the vehicles of other racers.
Oh look! Here comes Manosgirl and Tina. Nydia turns on the siren and tries to push them off the road!
* * *
(Winks at Angel)
Date: 3/23/2000
From: MalcolmFrink
Hey baby! I'm an electrician. I see a lot of action. Would you like to see some action? I'll even let you pet my dolphin! I have two actually. Blowie and Floppy. I like Blowie more, don't you?
* * *
SCREAMING LEMUR still on starting line..
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Yamaglonche
Huh...I was hoping we'd be starting on a hill...
Well....I don't suppose I could get a push...or...um......(sigh).....
oh, poopie!
-yams at rest
Boy, this racing stuff is dangerous!!!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: ManMan
(ManMan uses the Time Transport to go to the FUTURE! He arrives back in the present time with an armor plated, jet powered, monkey loving horse)
Bwahahahahahaha! I am unstoppable!
ManMan
PostGod
* * *
Zigra starts an earthquake!
Date: 3/23/2000
From: Samurai88
Force 17 no less. What's force 17? It's the "force of the earthquake on a certain scale" MUAHAHAHAHA only Zigra knows the scale. The one that detroyed Tokyo was only force 13. This one is force 17!
ROCK, ROLL, & RUMBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLE
"KCTT"
Samurai88
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tourists have been foolish enough to come and watch the wacky races since March 30, 2000. Of course, they were all frozen, slammed into by Pumaman, buried alive by mistake, eaten by Mitchell, fried by Pitch....