if for some reason you got here w/o going thru the index
here's my home, not yours.


1.2.99 (11:56 pm, seoul)
i am not a happy squash. i am a perturbed rutabaga who damn-damn wishes she was back in the states. a disgruntled root vegetable who is mightly tired of this alter-ego that appears in the face of foreign language. a bower and scraper, a smiler and nodder. my anger is thinner these days, but it comes, oh it still comes.

i am not pmsing.

things NOT TO SAY to a flatulent annie(what. if you ate the approximate weight of three cows in grilled beef in as many days, you'd be flatulent too)

do you like america better or do you like korea better?
you don't understand what i'm saying do you?
why you look like you're in 6th grade! my daughter is fourteen and not only is she taller than you, she looks a lot more mature than you.
last seen pushing a pushpop at: mole


1.1.99 (10:08, seoul)
last seen doing the running man at: bloop; medianstrip ; and chopigami

after systematically working my way outsides in to the middle-end of the cybergrrls link list i feel like i've made my acquaintance of most of the web-literate, navel-gazing as-am women out there. which makes my paltry endeavor seem even more paltry. so in the interest of the new year, salvaging pride and avoiding anymore time spent looking at such page-turners like 'state and society in contemporary korea' a-htmling we a-go! the best to you and yours.



12.31.98 (10:55 pm, seoul) last seen ogling: malinchista'n'crew
last seen reading: medic(a surprisingly pepperupper of a memoir by a us health-type-guy (love the grasp of language, the descriptive prowess, the, uh, vivid imagery, annie-foo) who spent time in japan and korea. not an asshole. refreshing)

hell is a korean supermarket. thousands of people with no sense of personal space swinging cabbage and toting children. let's not even get into the parking scene. i'll sing america the beautiful thirty times if you just give me 5 acres of amber waves of grain. also. who let it become an hour from 1999? who said this was OK? even if i insist on my NYCcentric time, that only buys me 14 more hours. some station is s'posed to play 1999 all 24 hours. i guess not every year gets it own song - though somehow i doubt college students all across america were feversihly reading 1984 when the clock struck zero. then again, what do i know. i was six.

merry new year. what's your resolution?



12.29.98 (10:34 pm, seoul)
last seen lurking at: inscrutable me and halfempty
last seen reading: 2 years worth of Harpers and a linguistics textbook


i've been writing in guestbooks lately. small snippets that are supposed to intrigue and lead to a click click that will lead to here. which is silly because my homepage sucks. anyway, to misuse a word, it's axiomatic that i'm going to vacate here soon. the pissed-as-shit christine put it well - why do an online journal if being online makes you lie?



12.28.98 (9:16 pm, seoul) been mousing thru paperson and thinking about how political a person is allowed to be before they become a call-to-arms on two feet. which isn't necessarily bad. about the point of online journals and whether anonymity is something i want (obviously i didn't...there's even my old phone number from last year if you scrounge around long enough, but don't go messing with the new tenants) i guess i'm preparing to move my wee web presence after the big G happens in may. and the thought of a graveyard of spat-up paragraphs on the largely immobile life of an ivy league malcontent is disturbing. i'm so damn ambivalent about this journal thing! joan didion's 'form' of the journal, the private, incoherent collection of sentence fragments and other mind-blips, that's the kind i'm good at. well-structured, point-full, for public consumption journal i haven't learned how to do yet. so i have a feeling this will become a stringing together of sites i've been grooking and things i've been reading. which i can't imagine being all that interesting. then again, i can't imagine extensive descriptions of my pending life in the library will be particulary thrilling. like i've been saying to folks, i gotta become the yalie i hate, in order to become not a yalie.

i know i know. christmas is over. even on the other side of the date line. but the norad santa-tracking site sheds new light on, on, on something. go see the latest in modern military equipment prove that santa really does exist

sometime-soon-i-swear-reading-list-no-1: the design of everyday things by donald a norman; beggars in spain by nancy kress, life outside (can't read my scribble) by michelangelo signorile; naked states by spencer tunick (photography); more things (ceci n'est pas un titre) written by courtney weaver, man eating bugs: the art and science of eating bugs by peter menzel and faith d'alvisio; and how to play in traffic by penn and teller. i guess this is where i provide you with a link to amazon and tell you to buy things so they'll give me commission. uh. go look at booktraders.



tired

12.27.98 (5:00 pm, seoul)
i didn't bring enough cds to this popdancyfied place so i've been hanging out at cdnow listening to those 30 second clips. also been listening to the cd that came included with my drumhiphop book in the hopes that a decent sense of rhythm can be acquired thru diffusion. and if i really think about what the previous two sentences say about me and music i'd get embarrassed. sumbuddy send me a mix tape plis.

worthwhile web endeavor for the disposable age: the dead media handbook



12.26.98 (9:17 pm, seoul)
i changed my first diaper today. there. do i need to add anymore than that? yes? how about another TPQ of the undefined time period:
reality is a collective hunch (lily tomlin)

12.25.98 (10:34 pm, seoul)
kudos to life in a not-really christian nation....there is actually something to do this fine day. 2 years ago in lima i think we tried to go out to eat, failed since all was shuttered and festive, and ultimately found ourselves at the movies(smart folks) with everyone else who was tired of gathering 'round pianos and popping the bubble wrap that came with their third alarm clock. anyway. i lied about the gastro-check, i'll put ones in here when inspired, but otherwise i'll spare you the blow-by-blow. go julie-shi for moral support! go salon for providing TPQ of the undefined time period:
I am for U.S. government Inspected art, grade A art, Regular Price art, Yellow Ripe art, Extra Fancy art, Ready-to-Eat art, Best-for-Less art, Ready-to-Cook art, Fully Cleaned art, Spend Less art, Eat Better art, Ham art, Pork art, chicken art, tomato art, banana art, apple art, turkey art, cake art, cookie art. (Claes Oldenburg, yup he did the morse lipstick)


12.24.98 (5:16 pm, seoul)
bought guppies! three of them! and everyone needs to read mr. blue because who doesn't write and who doesn't love.



12.23.98 (9:04 pm, seoul)
as a *learning* experience i trekked my pale self to kang-nam and a seoul natl u grad student pah-tee. i'm big on learning experiences these days. shabby quark-ing. half-assed web-ing. my drums. learning's all good but what happened to MASTERING?
anyway some small truth-bone told me it's worse than hypocritical to dog on a country i see only from the outside. i think my korean got a little better. i ate pools and pools of a swiss (from, not the holey kind strange folk like to put on sandwiches better served by pepper jack) cheese fondue and got more confirmation that real people don't stand in circles. they sit in them. back in the day of h. summer school, i used to say i had three cardinal rules.
never smoke
never sleep before 3 am
and never stand in circles

new item. section. whatever. if i get the knowhow that m (outfit check - what are YOU wearing today?) has i might ask for input. i guess that would require visitors too. anyway, a shameless ripoff in a not necessarily obvious way. gastro-intestinal check (i bet mom will bookmark this one....)


12.22.98 (5:58 pm, seoul)
sitting in a foreign country with too much research to do, no wheels, and no friends. and somehow that's for the best. i've channeled brain time to finding a life on the internet.
funny enough, i haven't figured how to write for the internet. this int'l connection is funky, and my defense still up. look at marking time for con queso annie-style.


12.21.98
fresh start. screw waiting for new year's, i'm making a winter equinox proposal. i keep killing my web journal cuz i get embarrassed, or it gets unwieldy, or just plain stupid, and then starting it up again because the exhibitionist in me won't shuddup. so here it is again. version 3.0beta. because i have loud-mouthed dreams of photoshop wonderland.


if you must. this is the last one