It's the flip side or, rather, the Mulder side of the 'Deconstructing'
series. Hope you like it. But you probably won't. I'm being a 
pessimist.

Disclaimer: Fox William and Dana Katherine do not belong to me. The
            belong to Chris Carter and his whole royal entourage. I'm
            not making any money from this. Don't sue me. 

Rating: I don't know what a rating is.

Deconstructing Mulder: Acoustic #3
by
Tamani R. Green

***********************************************************************
Goo Goo Dolls

Acoustic #3

They painted up your secrets
With the lies they told you
And the least they ever gave you
Was the most you ever knew

And I wonder where these dreams go
When the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
No one's listening anyway

Your voice is small and fading
And you hide in here unknown
And your mother loves your father
'Cause she's got nowhere to go

And she wonders where these dreams go
'Cause the world for in her way
What's the point ever trying
Nothing's changing anyway

They press their lips against you
And you love the lies they say
And I tried so hard to reach you
But you're falling anyway

And you know I see right through you
'Cause the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
You're not listening anyway
***********************************************************************
    Mulder sat in his apartment. He was alone. And he was thinking. A
dangerous occupation for someone who so often went on gut feelings. 
    He thought about his parents and how their actions and words
affected him. He thought about all the lies his parents fed him when he
was a boy. They had no idea that he would become a man driven by those
lies.
    And driven he was. He was so dedicated that he pulled innocent
people into his quest. Like her. He hated the fact that she had become
a pawn in this dangerous game of interplanetary chess. And for that he
hated the web of lies his parents wove each time they lied to him as a
child. 
    When he tried to confront them they only added to the lies that 
were already told. And after that fateful night in Quonochontaug, 
whenever he tried to get some sort of sign of affection from them, he
was rejected. Time and again they pushed him away. In their guilt, in
their remorse, in their anger. And that went a long way to forming the
man he had become.
    Even now, his mother would not give him the answers he needed so
desperately. Indeed, one of the few times he confronted her directly, 
she had become angry and slapped him. That was the first time his she
had ever laid a hand on him. 
    At least he knew she actually acknowledged that he was there and 
not some bothersome insect to be swatted away in annoyance. Now that
he was a grown man, their actions hurt just as much, but he knew how 
to deal with it. 
    And he was still angry at them. That the least they ever gave him
was the most he ever knew. And that even now, at the age of thirty-
seven, he could still be hurt about it like a twelve year old would
be. 
    They had taken away all he ever wanted for himself. This quest 
that he was on had robbed him of a wife, a father, a life. And it had
almost taken away her life. And because of that he was even more 
determined to not let their, *her* stuggles be in vain.