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The Penny

I was counting my money the other day when I noticed a penny that looked different from the other pennies. It had a swirly texture. I put it in my mouth. It tasted different from the other pennies. It was tangy. I never tasted a tangy penny before so I separated it from the pile. This must be a special penny, I thought to myself. It must be my lucky penny. I never had a lucky penny before. I was nervous. What if someone tried to steal my lucky penny? I had to find a safe place to hide it. After much careful planning, I thought of the perfect place. I would tape it to my left butt cheek. Yes. That would be the spot. Nobody would ever look there. That’s when I began to worry again. What kind of tape would stick to my butt cheek the best? I tried scotch tape first. It came off. I tried masking tape. It too, came off. What about duct tape? That might work. I tried the duct tape but it only lasted a day before it came off. I was devastated. What would stick the penny to my butt and keep it there? Super glue! Yes. That had to be the answer. I hurried to the store in search of the super glue. I couldn’t find any. All they had was krazy glue. I never tried krazy glue before. Would it work the same as super glue? I asked the store clerk if krazy glue was as strong as super glue. The clerk asked me what I was going to use it for. I couldn’t tell him that. He might try to steal the penny from my butt if he knew. I told him it was for an experiment then decided to purchase the substance. I took the krazy glue home and put a tiny drop on my lucky penny. Then I slapped it onto my butt cheek. I looked at my butt in the mirror and to my disbelief I had slapped it onto the wrong butt cheek. I was mortified. Could this mean......no. This couldn’t mean that my lucky penny was actually an unlucky penny, could it? I panicked. The penny wouldn’t come off. I tried to pry it off with a butter knife. It was stuck. I was convinced. This was no lucky penny after all. It was a curse.

the end


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