Blindspot - The syndrome caused when your 
                     partner turns on the spotlight without first 
                     checking where it's aimed.

                  Braidiation (bray dee ay shun) - The natural
                     tendency of the monitor cables, I.V. line, 
                     oxygen tubing and straps to become hopelessly 
                     entertwined en route to the hospital.

                  Budavoidance (bud ah voy dans) - The reflex 
                     of breathing disgusting smells through your nose 
                     since you'd rather smell it than get it on your 
                     tongue.

                  Dipsqueal - The feedback made when your 
                     partner forgets to turn off the pager or 
                     portable before you talk on the unit radio.

                  Grossmat - Abbreviation for "Grotesque and 
                     Foul Materials". These are compounds you try to 
                     get the student to stand in, handle, 
                     breathe, etc.

                 Hallitotalled (hal i toh tald) - The effects 
                    on your lungs after breathing the exhaled air 
                    from an enebriated person with poor dental 
                    hygiene.

                 Herniholler (her nee hahl er) - The sounds 
                    emitted by personell involved in lifting the 
                    larger than life patient.

                 Lackahumor - The stupid jokes always made at 
                    restaurants ("is the food that bad?") as the EMS 
                    personell wait to eat.

                 Nosault - The olfactory pain experienced on 
                    removing most peoples shoes.

                 Rotaguide (ro tah gide) - The technique of 
                    turning a map upside down, sideways, etc in order 
                    to orient it to "the way we are going".

                 Sonoricide (soh nor oh side) - The 
                    justifiable homicide of a snoring partner.

                 Spindletop - When fueling up, the inevitable 
                    backwash of gasoline that regurgitates from the 
                    filler, usually much faster than you can dodge it.

                 Trikey (try kee) - The transmutation of 
                    matter that keeps the gas pump keys from fitting 
                    until each has been tried three times.

                 Yelpanic (yel pan ik> - The hysterical 
                    confusion of the driver in front of you upon 
                    hearing the siren after five minutes of blocking 
                    your path.

                Pseudowoowoo (soo doh woo woo) - The situation 
                   of "running hot" but forgetting to turn on the 
                   emergency lights.

                Momthump - The sound that would be made if you 
                   could silence a meddling mother your way.

                Joulefool (jool fool) - The person who doesn't 
                   listen when you yell "Clear!" prior to 
                   defibrillating.

Wind Beneath My Wings