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The scene crackles and hisses, and fills with static. After a few moments, the static fades, showing two young men in their early twenties. They are seated around a large, dusty barrel, with a stone wall behind them. It is impossible to say exactly where they might be. Subtitles appear beneath the image of each man - Grroodal and Bek. Must be their names. The young men are talking excitedly, and are whispering conspiratorially while often checking over their shoulders.

Grroodal: D'ya tink it ken work?
Bek: 'Course it'ken work, y'idjit! Y'don't tink I been plannin' dis fer four months fer nuttin', d'ya?
Grroodal: Noooo [pauses]. Bek, d'ya tink 'tis da right ting ta do?
Bek: [Looks around wildly]. By da gods, yer a paggin' idjit! I tolds ya not'ta use our real names! Call me "Blarf", ya twice-blasted fool!
Grroodal: Sorry Bek [Bek's face goes beet red]....I mean Blarf!
Bek: [Somewhat mollified] That's better. Now, back t'me plan.
Grroodal: Are ya sure no one knows 'bout it Be....Blarf?
Bek: 'Course no one knows! I've only told you, and you ain't told no one, has ya?
Grroodal: Ummmmm....
Bek: Grroodal, tells me ya ain't told no one!
Grroodal: Don't call me Grroodal...[pauses to think]. Call me "Grroodan".
Bek: I'll calls ya dead meat in a minute if ya don't answer me question!
Grroodal: Well, I might have said sometin to me ma...
Bek: [Slaps his forehead, and stares at Grrodal with a mixture of disbelief and disgust] Ya told yer paggin' mudder!
Grroodal: Only a bit!
Bek: Which bit.
Grroodal: Ummm....well....[tugs at his collar]. Pretty much all of it.
Bek: Yer a paggin' fool, Grroodal. Still, yer ma's a good woman, so she probably won't say nuttin.
Grroodal: Dat's right!
Bek: So, back to our plot. D'ya remember what we're gonna do?
Grroodal: You bet, Bek! [Bek slaps Grroodal on the back of the head] I mean Blarf! We're gonna steal....[pauses dramatically, and looks around the room]...the Crown Jewels!
Bek: [Bek's mouth drops open, and he stares at Grroodal anew. His look of disbelief is gradually losing ground to the look of disgust]. Where d'ya keep yer brains, ya paggin' oaf? 'Cause they can't be in that soddin' great melon of yers! Where are they? [yelling now] D'ya keep'em in a box?
Grroodal: Huh?
Bek: [Practically screaming] For the last time! WE'RE NOT GONNA STEAL THE CROWN JEWELS! WE'RE GONNA STEAL THIS HERE BARREL OF ALE [thumps the barrel they've been leaning on] FROM CHUCKLES' INN! We're in the basement of the inn right now! We're gonna steal this barrel of ale!
Chuckles: [A corpulent, sour-faced man with strong arms, dressed in a cotton apron, enters the scene. A subtitle beneath him reads "Chuckles".] Yer plannin' on doin' what now?
Grroodal: Uh....ummm....errr....
Bek: Uh, nuttin', Chuckles...we were just talkin'!
Chuckles: [He pauses, and his face grows beet red] GET OUT OF MY PAGGIN' INN! [Grroodal and Bek stumble to their feet, and beat a hasty retreat up the stairs. Chuckles manages to land a solid boot to Bek's rump before he escapes. The scene gradually fades to static, and a flashing sign appears.]